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telephonesia - Forgetting who you're calling just as the phone is answered.

e.g., I called my friend Scott, but when his mother picked up the phone, I contracted a severe case of telephonesia and stuttered like an idiot for thirty seconds, not remembering who it was that I was calling, until she hung up. (This is particularly likely to happen if you are making a plethora of calls, using a list of numbers and not getting many answers.)

submitted by Brendan Brown

telephoney - Used to describe the monopoly of the telephone company in the 70s. Still creeps up when old-timers in the computer industry talk about how Steve Wozniak was able to make free long distance phone calls with a "blue box." Pronounced: Tell-awf-phony

e.g., I tell ya, son, when ol' Woz was able to beat the telephoney and call the Vatican to wake up the Pope -- for free -- well, that was just too groovy.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

telepiphany - To come to a mutual realization with someone while conversing over an ICQ-style chat client.

e.g., I was chatting with Adam last night over AIM, and we had this telepiphany about Bil Keane as a postmodern commentator on the post-Vietnam American nuclear family, surgically deconstructing the flawed ideologies that define modern existence.

submitted by Chris

telepollegibus - (tell-a-pole-EDGE-ee-boos; n.) Communication by means of texting with one's thumbs. [Latin, tele 'distant' + pollex 'thumb' (in the ablative case pollegibus 'by [the] thumbs'). Also "telethumbing."

e.g., Telegraph, telegram, telephone, telepollegibus: the evolution of electronic communication.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

teleprechaun - A thoroughly modern leprechaun who uses planes and phones and TV and computers and everything.

e.g., I met a real teleprechaun the other day down at the pub and he gave me a tip on the gold market.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

teleprosy - A type of leprosy that spreads very quick, like a fast moving storm, flows of lava, aggressive weeds, and the like.

e.g., In the beginning the word was that it was a simple case of unqualified leprosy, but in short order it was quickly determined that they had their hands full with a virulent plague of teleprosy.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

teleslow - 56k telephone line internet.

e.g., He uses a teleslow to play a game.

submitted by Fox

teletripsy - (TEL-leh-trip-see; n.) 1. Arial bombing or shelling by distant artillery; 2. mail bombs; (facetious) 3. A Dear John letter. [From the Greek tele- "distant, far" + tripsy "crushing": literally, "distant crushing."]

e.g., "Wow, look at the wreckage. The whole city's in ruins." "Yeah: it's teletripsy, for sure." || The bomber mailed the device from St. Paul; it killed his partner in Fort Worth: teletripsy. || "His girl dumped him." "By mail?" "Yep." "Harsh." "Yep." "He looks horrible." "Yep: teletripsy." "Yeah. Wow."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

tellcraft - (Rhymes with BELL-daft; n.) 1. Arithmetic; 2. The talent possessed by those blessed with mathematical talent, training, or skill; 3. Keeping tally; 4. Accounting. [From the Old English "telcraeft," the original English word for mathematics.] One skilled in tellcraft is "tellcrafty," and is called a "tellcrafter" or "tellcroft."

e.g., Tommy: “Grampa, have you seen my maths homework?”   Grampa: “Ah, your tellcraft.”   Tommy: “My what?”   Grampa: “You are truly tellcrafty, my boy....You get that from your mother.”   Tommy: “I do?”   Grampa: “Oh yes. Let me show you: 'Darla!'”   Darla: “Yes, Dad?” Grampa: “If I have €13 000 000, and purchase twelve tonnes of dyes from an Indian company at ₹1120/tonne, and I rent an old warehouse at £1 000/night for---”   Darla: “Oh, stop it, Dad: you use that example every time you demonstrate my 'tellcraft.'”   Grampa: “I do?”   Darla: “Yes, you do. And the answer at the end is ¥902,561. .... No, wait---sorry---it's ¥920,561.”   Tommy: “Wow.”  

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

tells - Tales.

e.g., What I'll blogging here is tells of my day-to-day life, embellished quite a bit in the hope that that will make them interesting enough to read. Wishful thinking on my part?

submitted by Miss Speller

telly machine - Alternative name for the TV remote, used to change channels.

e.g., Pass us the telly machine. This channel's tripe.

submitted by Michael Sweeney-Glover

telly tube - An extremely popular form of entertainment, found everywhere, and available to the highly and the lowly. Some regard it as a source of brainrot and inferior mind control.

e.g., We done seed it on the telly tube several times over and over so it must be true, and reliable.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

telvinaut - A crude mixture of television and astronaut; used to describe someone whose exploration and education needs are sufficed by watching TV.

e.g., Ed. You mean Billy dropped out of school? How will he learn? Fred. Through PBS and Nova specials, of course -- he's a regular telvinaut.

submitted by bilyeu

temblid - (adj.) characterized by earthquakes or, metaphorically, by trembling. [From temblor '[small] earthquake' on analogy with stupid < stupor, humid < humo[u]r.]

e.g., Come on, say something to her! Don't be temblid.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

temma - To posses an unquestionable amount of coolness.

e.g., Calamity Jane had unparalleled temma.

submitted by Concerned Citizen

temp - any co-worker (not necessarily a temporary employee) who shows a profound lack of intelligence and/or initiative, yet always knows a better way for you to do your job

submitted by Greg

temper tantrum - To calm a childish fit of rage.

e.g., Sometimes, when a child has a hissy fit, I can temper tantrum with a distracting song or joke.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

temperor - (n.) Someone who controls (or believes themselves to control) others through fear of (sometimes spectacular) tantrums. [Feminine "tempress"; not to be confused with "temptress," which is something else entirely.]

e.g., One of the archetypes in modern literature is the tempress dowager: the older woman who is a screeching harpy toward the younger ingenue heroine.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

tempertine - Any substance that seems to cool your temper.

e.g., There must be tempertine in this lemon-lime-vanilla drink. I'm no longer angry.

submitted by Robert Dale Younce - (www)

tempon - Temporary employees hired for a short-time to "soak up" extra work around the office.

e.g., That project was killing us until we hired those tempons.

submitted by Ben

temporoaudial abrasion syndrome - The unfortunate state when a musician's recording company selects to release songs, which require many plays to enjoy, as singles. This syndrome causes good songs by good artists to be unrecognised as people do not initially like them. It is caused by a record company's overexposing the song, leading them to accurately believe it is superior, without taking into consideration the original tolerance period needed to enjoy it.

e.g., I didn't like Roisin Murphy's "If We're In Love" at first, but now I love it. Now that it's a single, it's really got a bad case of temporoaudial abrasion syndrome, so o one's buying it.

submitted by Klamath

temptasation - The act of relieving temptation.

e.g., It was great temptasation to remove her clothing.

submitted by Lawrence

ten - The best, as in Bo Derek.

e.g., Girl, your hair looks ten.

submitted by GigiGrrrl

ten ladies long - Having to wait a ridiculously long time for something, line optional. Coined by my friend Emily on a recent roadtrip, when we pulled into a gas station to use the restroom, and promptly turned around when we saw that the line was 10 ladies long. Needless to say, we used the expression all weekend.

e.g., Forget it. I'm not going to the post office right now. The line is ten ladies long.

submitted by Jacqui

ten shades - (n) To a high degree, a large amount. Usually used to quantify emotions.

e.g., I won the lottery! I am ten shades of excited!

submitted by Sarah Gem

ten ten - An informal meeting with managment -- ten minutes for you, ten minutes for me.

e.g., Hey, your ten ten is set for 12:30 tomorrow, OK?

submitted by Griff

ten-think - The pervasive way in which the number 10 is treated as "a special number." Some examples of ten-think: "on a scale from one to ten"; "a perfect ten"; multiples of ten, decades; hundreds of years, dollars, centuries; thousands of years, dollars, people; five, twenty-five, etc, as being portions of ten, one hundred, etc; millions of dollars, years, people.

e.g., I'm surrounded by ten-thinkers.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tenacidty - A commitment so fierce that it can corrode character, relationships, and the task itself.

e.g., Rick is our junior high football coach. He ran the summer PeeWee football training program with great tenacidty. Two were lucky enough to need treatment as outpatients. Four others will be out of the hospital in about three weeks.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

tenchiper - Young childrens' variant of temperature.

e.g., I don't feel good Momma. Will you take my tenchiper so I don't have to go to school?

submitted by steve zihlavsky

tendentially - With a tendency towards. There are 9000 various Google references to this word and yet I can't find it in any dictionary. [ED. Now your can.]

e.g., The data tendentially approached the predicted value.

submitted by Eric

tender - A very attractive female.

e.g., I met a girl last night at the bar. She is a tender.

submitted by Anthony C. Weber

tenderfood - Grub what be fitten for little ones and old ones without no teeth and those under the weather; i.e. it's soft and mild and needs hardly no chewin' a tall.

e.g., Many times lately we've been feedin' grampa and the baby the same thing. It's mashed and pulverized tenderfood from the table. The dog gets a bit of it, too, and leftovers for the morrow.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tenderitis - Playing sports with an injury that still hurts when touched.

e.g., I could have stretched that double into a triple if I hadn't had tenderitis in my big toe.

submitted by fredwick

tenderizer - Slang for a type of dance movement involving the swinging of the right arm with a contorted expression on the face. The Tenderizer.

e.g., Zubin, when you do the tenderizer, it makes me laugh really hard!

submitted by jli - (www)

tenderoni - Used by older women to describe an attractive and seemingly innocent and inexperienced young male.

e.g., Demi Moore got herself a tenderoni.

submitted by Sandy L. Campos

tendril - Anything useless that is kept for no particular reason. A packrat saves tendril; something most people would throw away that is kept.

e.g., Barnaby's apartment is full of tendril. "Dave needs to throw away that stack of newspaper and all the other tendril he's got cluttering his patio."

submitted by BigJ7489

tenebraphiliac - A person or thing who loves, is fascinated with, or mostly active in darkness.

e.g., Little Bobby is a tenebraphiliac; he only goes out at night..

submitted by Michael Garza

tenent - Tenant, a not uncommon misspelling for tenant.

e.g., Tom St. Dennis, in Cryptography for Developers: "If one of the fundamental tenants of Quantum Mechanics were wrong, it would be deeply surprising." | "He should have admitted, that as a practicing catholic, he chooses to ignore the tenants of his faith and embrace a government funded abortion policy that promotes abortion for the poor. That is a fact. No thinking person wants back door abortions but to promote government coverage of abortion at the whim of women using it as a method of birth control is morally and ethically wrong." | "The tenants of the FCC require that stations operate in the 'interest, convenience and necessity' of the American public."

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

tenfooting - When walking a dog and he stops about every ten feet to sniff something incredible interesting to a dog's nose, really throwing off your pace.

e.g., We had a great walk around the lake except for Bosco tenfooting me to death.

submitted by onjaysun

tenonitis - A woodworker's disease in which the tenons become stiff, resulting in rigor mortise.

e.g., The rigor died of rigor mortise after he allowed his tenons to stiffen.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tensity - The absolute most amount of tension you could have.

e.g., Let me massage your shoulders. You have a lot of tensity.

submitted by Jenny Block

tental - Acute mental illness involving unhealthy devotion to camping.

e.g., Not for Mark the pleasures of the five-star hotel. His nights were spent under canvas following years of abuse and humiliation. He was tental.

submitted by Michael Stradling

tentatise - To make up words.

e.g., This site is for people who like to tentatise.

submitted by Yean

tentative - To be undecided about camping.

e.g., Because of all the rain I was feeling a little tentative about the trip.

submitted by Bill

tentative agreement - Not an agreement. Possibly an agreement, even probably an agreement -- but not an agreement.

e.g., Bill: "So we have a tentative agreement?" Ted: "Sure. I'll run it by the boss and get back to you." ... [Later, when Bill and Ted meet again.] Bill: "Well, did you run it by your boss?" Ted: "Sure did." Bill: "Well, what did he have to say?" Ted: "He said no." Bill: "What? He said no? You're kidding. We had a deal. He's backing out? WTF?" Ted: "No, he's _not_ backing out. You can't back out of a deal unless you _have_ a deal. And we never had a deal. All we had was a proposed deal -- which you chose to refer to as a "tentative agreement." You knew at the time that only my boss could make a deal. I was just being a general dogsbody for him, sparing him from the negotiating details and the time it took. That's my job. Ultimately, he rejected what we came up with -- which sort of surprised me, to tell you the truth. Guess it shouldn't have, though. That's why he's the boss and I'm working for him, not the other way around. He always makes better deals than I do. ... You do realize, don't you, that he wrote a best-selling book called _The Art of the Deal_, don't you?" Bill: "You're right. I do. Should have known better. Unfortunately for me I told my boss we had reached an agreement and would be signing on the dotted line right after this meeting. ... I'll probably end up getting fired." Ted: "Too bad. But surely you know not count your chickens before they're hatched." Bill: Yeah right. I also know that oral agreements aren't worth the paper they're written on.

submitted by HD Fowler

tenth of all - Best of all, the best thing is, to top everything.

e.g., Nine of ten say they plan to honeymoon on Mars as soon as regular passage is available to the common World Citizen. But tenth of all they say that date is right around the corner when Pluto intersects with Uranus.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tenthink time - At last, base 10 configuration comes to time. Something you've been waiting for all your life. Ten months in a year. (Drop both months that begin with an A.) Ten days in a week. (Longer weekends.) Ten hours in the morning, ten hours in the evening. (Get more done in an hour.) One hundred minutes in an hour, one hundred seconds in a minute. Days in a month will alter between 36 and 37. Leap day end of May, middle of year. Very logical. But difficulty in adjusting to better system?

e.g., Think Ten, TenThink Time.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tentpole - "A big-budget movie whose earnings are expected to compensate the studio for its less profitable movies."

e.g., "Who will be blamed for Burt Wonderstone? JC Spink and his voracious dining appetite?? Toby Emmerich who also greenlit Jack The Giant Killer? Perhaps the same people at Warners who marketed all these duds? One suspects that there is much confusion at Warners and not a tentpole in sight.    "Comment by Rodney Allen Red — Friday March 15, 2013 @ 11:17pm PDT"

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tenue - 1. The manner in which one behaves. 2. The manner in which something functions or operates.

e.g., Studying mortal tenue is a growing field.

submitted by Steven Blank

tenvy - Ten envy. When you just can't seem to get into the top ten scores list.

e.g., I've been playing Snow Bowling on orisinal.com for ages, and I can't get above 2500 points. As a result, I now have tenvy.

submitted by Zanny - (www)

teotwawki - Absolute disaster--derived from "The End Of The World As We Know It"

e.g., Every election year, candidates warn of a teotwawki if their opponents wins. As yet, though, the world goes on.

submitted by John Payson

teow - Sounds like "meow." Crazy, eccentric, stupid.

e.g., Our neighbours dog is teow, as it only goes for walks on Saturdays and refuses to go on any other day.

submitted by Joylita

tep - telephone

e.g., I am gonna call Joe on the tep.

submitted by shaun

tequilla shotgun - Snort the salt. Take the shot. Then squeeze lemon juice in your eye. Voila, a tequilla shotgun.

e.g., Let's do tequilla shotguns. (I have actually seen this done.)

submitted by Ross

tequilology - The science of comparing various tequilas for taste and rating them.

e.g., Paul an amateur with tequila shooters, but deserves a Ph. D. in tequilology. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

submitted by Joel Parker

teratomobile - A monstrously large consumer automobile; an SUV or unneccessarily large truck.

e.g., Some idiot was driving a teratomobile that tore off my fender in the parking garage. Jerk was using her cell phone whilst spiraling down the exit ramp--at about 50km/hour!

submitted by Aaron Wells

teretsible - So horrible that it makes you shout swear words uncontrollably.

e.g., Don't tell her that in the library. It's too teretsible; you'll get kicked out.

submitted by Gaylebird

termagancy - The noun form of termagant -- "a shrewish woman; scold.:

e.g., Hellary Clinton may never be indicted and convicted for any crimes, but she's definitely guilty of termagancy. Me? I'm guilty of nephalism. (Almost.)

submitted by beelzebub - (www)

terminal dyslexia of the keyboard - A seveer disaese from wihch I sufefr wehn I sit in frnot of the temrinal at the keybaord.

e.g., As a mild dysleitc, myslef, I am aollwed to kid abuot Temrinal Dyselxia of eth Keybroad.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

terminal verbosity - The point at which you realize that you're saying some important stuff, but also that with the next sip of your drink you will dissolve into incoherence.

e.g., I was at the cusp of defining the eternal journalist/PR problem at Soho House last night when I realized I was about to join the drunk pile in the far corner. I was near terminal verbosity.

submitted by Bent Udder - (www)

terminate assist - Professional expert euthanasia provision or service: quite legal and widely available in the future.

e.g., Next week I'll be leaving here courtesy of terminate assist: it beats sitting out on the ice and being eaten by a polar bear.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

termite - Long form for a terminal loser. One who will never succeed or lead a prosperous life.

e.g., that smith guy cant even hold down a job sorting trash at the junk yard,. If he's not a termite, I don't know who is.

submitted by george kursar

tern - (pronounced like "turn"; n.) 1. one-third of a year, i.e., a period of four sequential calendar months; generally, 2. one of the three four-month thirds of the year: January--April; May--August; and September--December (this last is also known as the "embers" (q.v.). [A portmanteau of "term" (as in the three scholastic terms 'hillary,' 'trinity,' and 'michaelmas'), "trine" (a three of something), and "turn" (from the birds' song 'turn, turn, turn,' a sixties recitation of Ecclesiastes.]

e.g., He got home from a religious mission in April, but too late to start school the next tern, so he's going to work at his sister's office for a while before going back to the books.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

ternada - An intense meteorological disturbance with high winds and large objects being tossed about. Usually found in trailer parks.

e.g., Betty, get them hounds in befer the ternada gits here.

submitted by skywiser

ternupsidedownigmonify - -the bit of space where you turn upside down - by hyperspace

e.g., I am going through a wormhole and bypassing the portion of space called ternupsidedownigmonify.

submitted by Martin

teromzar - A situation or problem without solution or escape.

e.g., His business entered teromzar after the incident in the parking lot.

submitted by Tatomir Ion Marius

terracidal - Said of an act that will contribute to the ultimate demise of our planet. Terracide.

e.g., Any company that pollutes as much as that ought to be charged with terracide.

submitted by Laurie Damon Boese - (www)

terradyne - Used to describe a guy who can't take a hint that you're not interested in him even though you've clearly explained it.

e.g., That terradyne keeps calling me.

submitted by Tiffany

terranoid - A fear of Earth everything on it.

e.g., It was not useful to be precise in listing her phobias as she has been terranoid since kindergarten.

submitted by Sharon Huston - (www)

terriblendous - A word that describes something that is both terrible and horrendous.

e.g., That test was terriblendous.

submitted by Sammy

terribull - Half terrier and half bulldog. This dog usually makes awful mistakes.

e.g., My terribull knocked over a very expensive vase today.

submitted by Amanda

terrid - terrible and horrid

e.g., It was a terrid night out there, with blowing snow and wind all over

submitted by Nathan Powell

terrieredity - Basically, the phenomenum of people and their dogs looking alike in the face. This can be observed at dog shows. Can apply to all breeds of dogs, not just Terriers.

e.g., Did you see the man with the beard out walking his Schnauzer? Major case of terrieredity there, wouldn't you say?

submitted by Paul

terrisistible - So horrible you can't look away, like a train wreck.

e.g., "Showgirls" was so terrisistible I watched the whole thing twice.

submitted by Alice

terrist - (n.) A terrorist, minus the middle syllable. Another in a long line of criscoids (as I call words made by shortening other, longer words), such as "prolly" for probably, "opportuny" for opportunity, and so forth. As a descriptive linguist, I note these neologisms as perfectly in keeping with the well-established laws of elision, deletion, and sandhi forms. I must, nevertheless, admit that I find them as annoying as a swarm of horseflies. I have always held that we should listen to one another with an ear toward understanding, rather than picking apart the way others speak (or write). Conversely, I have always also held that we should speak to one another, insofar as possible, in their own idiom. To a certain extent, to be sure, this is rather difficult when we are speaking in our own language to someone who speaks that same language in another dialect (whether or not we find that dialect "lazy," "low," or just "wrong"---labels, we should note, which the Aramaic speakers in Judea gleefully applied to the Lord's own Galilean speech). It is tempting to simply stop listening to someone speaking with different grammatical rules or a distinct accent or whatever, ignoring WHAT they say entirely and focusing instead on the WAY they are saying it. Consider the situation of someone being told by another, "We come down dis mornin and seen da dam ready to bust! We was set to go fishin, but now we gotta book!" It is hardly the time to start 'correcting' the fellow's speech. Quite aside from the danger of a flood, he's not likely going to change because of a metalinguistic reprimand. Despite the detachment enjoined by my linguistic creed, however, every time somebody says something like "this is prolly a good opportuny for a terrist," I feel an overwhelming urge to leap to my feet and yell, "It's proBABly a good opportuNITy for a terrORist, you mumbling blockhead!" Fortunately, I have never given in to my base rage, so nobody knows how truly vile I consider these criscoids to be. I can hardly condemn them, of course, since English is riddled with criscoids. The word York, for example, comes from the drastically foreshortened "Eboracum," lady is the descendant of the ancient "hlaf-dige," which meant "bread-kneader," and even goodbye comes from "God be by ye." And I shouldn't condemn the criscoids anyway, since sitting in judgement upon them seems to me to be "taking the chief seats," which the Lord specifically enjoins in Luke 14. Anyway, "terrist," a neologism I encountered in a Twitter post (by someone else, mind; I don't like social media. It worries me.). A word that's prolly here to stay. (Heaven help us.)

e.g., It seems the whole world spends its days and nights trembling in fear of terrists. I guess the terrism worked.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

territori-teetee - The act of a male letting other males know that the girl he is with is off limits, usually involving touching the female in an intimate way and giving combative looks to competing the males. From animals urinating to mark their territory.

e.g., I did see one hot guy at the party, but then my husband took a territori-teetee and ran him off.

submitted by Breezy

terrorism - With all the recent brouhaha about TEA Partiers as terrorists, it seems appropriate to remind people of what terrorism really is. Nota bena: A three-year-old child who threatens to hold her breath until she passes out is not a terrorist -- despite her making a threat to get her way. "The use of violence and threats to intimidate or coerce, especially for political purposes." | "The deliberate murder of civilians for a political cause, specifically to intimidate the victims into surrendering and to muster support among one’s own potential supporters."

e.g., Revolutionaries resort to terrorism when they can't achieve their ends by legitimate means. What good comes from calling mere political hardball terrorism?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

terrortory - A scary politician.

e.g., Michael Howard, the leading terrortory, addressed the unfortunate attendees..

submitted by Hammerton - (www)

tersigiveration - The stuff that gets on your shoes whenever you go to the post office.

e.g., I've had it with the ubiquitous tersigiveration of the postal kingdom. From now on, I'm going to do *all* of my mailing transactions by way of the mailbox.

submitted by Fabriel Gauré

terthsome - From the point of view of the denizens of The Third Planet, commonly called Earth. According to human concepts, ideas, beliefs, conclusions. Not necessarily perfectly objective, realistic, or accurate.

e.g., When finally firmly entrenched on planet Mars circa year 2060 it was found that exiting terthsome limiting boxes was difficult to interacting effectively with multidimensional native lifeforms.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

teshmelon - The result of the first time you shampoo on your own after you get a new haircut, and you not only lose the style, but your head looks abnormally large and rectangular for the rest of the day.

e.g., When I left the salon yesterday, my doo was stylin...but today I got the teshmelon.

submitted by Busta Shoelace

tessaged - A text message delivered primarily over the phone. A mix of “text” and “message.”

e.g., Chris tessaged me with the location of theatre so I could meet him at the play.

submitted by Denise Siedner

testament - In education -- a tool for the assessment of student learning that to the student feels like a test.

e.g., A spring testament in reading was given to assess student progress.

submitted by Elisabeth Kachline

testees - A person taking a test. Sounds rude, I know. I know.

e.g., I am the tester. You are my testees.

submitted by Karen Troupis

testhese - Appendages atttached to the male torso that auto-react with any perceived threat to one's manhood.

e.g., Phil: Hey, buddy, stop pushing me. So I spent some time with your girl -- no big deal. Don't get your dander up. Will: So you hit on my gal behind my back? It ain't my dander that's up. Testhese.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

testiculate - To talk bollocks. Heard on John Peel's Radio 4 Home Truths.

e.g., Don't listen to him, he always testiculates.

submitted by Malcolm

testilie - To lie under oath during testimony, in order to make a case look stronger than it is.

e.g., I'm on my way to court to go testilie.

submitted by jc3

testinal forty dude - Someone who's succeeded in reaching or surpassing the Big Four Oh [40 years of age, that is.]

e.g., Not long ago my child became a testinal forty dude, and even though that reflects on my growing antiquity, it serves to mark moments in time that indicate achievement and progress.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

testosterone poisoning - Phrase used to describe a much misunderstood, incurable, male specific behavioral malfunction attributable to the juxtaposition of the X chromosome next to the Y chromosome.

e.g., Ted's belief that if some is good, more is better was our first indication that he was suffering from testosterone poisoning.

submitted by Apremma

testosterony - Used to describe actions generally branded as macho or possessing masculine bravado. 2. Faint smell that all men, regardless of arguing to the contrary, do possess. Usually detected only by women, and most easily determined by lesbians.

e.g., ::Thea typing at computer:: Mike: Hey, Thea. Thea: I knew that was you walking up behind me. Mike: How? Thea: You smell all testosterony.

submitted by Thea

testosterunt - A short man who is overly aggressive to compensate for his small size.

e.g., Louis De Palma, the character from Taxi, is a testosterunt. (ED. Just about the worst kind of cop in the world to run across is a testosterunt. The worst I've ever encountered is the Tulsa Police Department's (invisibled).)

submitted by Scott Marchus - (www)

testostojerk - The result of the transformation of an otherwise decent married man into a complete jerk during the five days prior to his wife’s onset of menses. Before and after her period he is regarded as a loving husband and father, but when his precious punkin morphs into The Dragon Lady each month, he effortlessly becomes a testotojerk.

e.g., “Hi, Jane, how’s Mark?” “The testostojerk? I’d like to put him in a rocket and fire him into the core of the sun.”

submitted by Mark C

testure - A combination of the words "test" and "torture" to describe the experiments on animals in laboratories. Created by Ogre of the band Skinny Puppy.

e.g., The painful experimentation inflicted on the young puppy amounted to no less than testure.

submitted by Matthew Barba

testymony - Testimony given grudgingly by someone who shows how annoyed she is for having been called to testify. People who testyfy instead of testifying are not only hard to get along with, they're also hard to believe."

e.g., "Did you watch Peter Strzok when he testified before that congressional committee last week?" "I watched maybe thirty seconds of it, then went back to streaming a movie. I could tell watching would just piss me off." "You missed a doozy. What Strzok did was testyfy rather than testify. I've never seen anyone act the way he did after swearing to tell the truth. I hope I'm not around to see something like that happen again."

submitted by testymony

tetragy - A series of four interrelated works, such as the first four seasons of the Simpsons.

e.g., I completed the second portion of the .hack tetragy today.

submitted by PMT - (www)

tetrahedrotransmogrispinnify - To spin round faster than the speed of light.

e.g., The ball spun round really fast. I thought it would tetrahedrotransmogrispinnify.

submitted by leeleebigc

tetrapoly - (n.) 1. An intersection with four gas stations or other businesses on its four corners; 2. the four businesses having the largest market shares in whatever they sell or do; 3. the area defined by the urban and suburban areas of four cities. [From Gk tetra "four" + polein "to sell" (for defs 1 & 2), or (def 3) polis "a city."]

e.g., 1. Go straight on until you come to that tetrapoly of restaurants---McDonalds, Burger King, Wendy's, and Carl's Junior---and then turn east." 2. The Walmart-Costco-Kroger-Safeway tetrapoly control 55% of the grocery market share. 3. Often called the Quad Cities, the tetrapoly of (1) Davenport and (2) Bettendorf, Iowa, and (3) Rock Island and (4) Moline, Illinois, are home to almost half a million people (or probably more than half a million by now: my data's a few years old).

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

tetris-head - The condition of closing your eyes and still seeing the video game you've been playing for hours on end, usually diagnosed while trying to sleep.

e.g., After staying up all night playing Asteroids, I had serious tetris-head -- every time I closed my eyes, I could still see the floating rocks.

submitted by g_love

tetriss - To fit items of different sizes and shapes into a finite space.

e.g., Luckily, Darcy was able to tetriss the moving boxes into the elevator.

submitted by Tamara Leer

teugh - Drink made from the granulated tea concentrate found in British vending machines.

e.g., After one taste from her cup of teugh, she stuck to the hot chocolate.

submitted by Gerard

teuro - Pronounced "toy-ro," German slang for the new European currency, the Euro. Derived from the German word "teuer," meaning exepensive. It refers to the general rise in real prices that occured during the introduction of the new currency.

e.g., You paid 10 teuros for that salad? That's almost 20 marks. You've been ripped off.

submitted by Jason Fleischer

teveligion - Religion as presented and promoted on the media of television. In future it will evolve even further one hopes. (pron. tev-uh-lidg-in)

e.g., Teveligion is mostly of the fundamentalist, evangelical sort. It would be refreshing to have some programming that is more enlightened and free, please.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tevs - Exclamation which loosely translates to "oh," "hmmm," or "OK." Usually used at the beginning of a sentence or alone.

e.g., 1. Tevs, I've got to go by the post office today, so I'll be out for a bit.. 2. Mom: I won't be able to pick you up after soccer practice today, so I want you to ride home with Rachel McNaughton's mom, OK? Daughter: Tevs.

submitted by Paul

tewk - Hat, cap, or headwarming device, particularly of the Canadian variety.

e.g., Board, boots, mittens, tewk ... check. Pack up our Molson sixers and let's ride, eh?

submitted by briecheese

texarcana - Knowledge of Texas, unknown and mysterious to the average person. From a misspelling of Texarkana.

e.g., If you grow up in Texarkana, Texas, are your chances of knowing some Texarcana better than if you grow up in Texarkana, Arkansas? (ED. Can you believe Hillary Clinton pronounced Arkansas (r-can-saw) R-Kansas when she ostensibly threw her support behind Barack Obama?)

submitted by HD Fowler

texas tee-shirt - The large paper protector that comes from a dispenser in a public toilet, to place over the seat.

e.g., He was so drunk, he came out of the stall wearing a Texas tee-shirt.

submitted by Steve McDonald

texas tommy - San Francisco Balboa Festival: A "Texas" Tommy was a female prostitute who worked the trenches and/or walked the streets in the early 1900s. Street Swing | Texas Tommy: The "Texas Tommy" is said by many to be the first swing dance. The main reason being that during this period (1909), all the dances were done in "closed" position, this was supposedly the first modern dance of the time to include the "break-away" step (dancing in open position) while using the basic 8-count rhythm of swing dance.

e.g., 1. Maybe what you need is a Texas Tommy to take off the edge. 2. Was that the Texas Tommy they were doing in the Gap ad?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

texecutioner - A Texas state employee responsible for carrying out executions.

e.g., How many texecutioners does Texas have?

submitted by HD Fowler

text slut - One who carries on text conversations with more than one person at the one time.

e.g., Are you texting someone else right now? You're such a text slut.

submitted by Marina Mirage

textalogue - The texting equivalent of a dialogue or conversation taking place through the electronic medium of mobile phone texting.

e.g., My son and I were having a wonderful textalogue about the firing of Rich Rodriguez (head coach of the University of Michigan football team).

submitted by Lisa Blake

textcreta - Text-speak that makes no sense whatsoever to the reader.

e.g., Can you explain what that bit of textcreta actually meant? I've never seen the phrase wubu2lv before.

submitted by Snag

texted - Verbing the noun "text," indicating a past tense of sending a message to someone over a mobile (cell) phone, using SMS (short message service).

e.g., Diane was sitting alone at the bar, her second home, waiting for the ever-late Chris, when finally she'd had enough and texted him to ask where he was.

submitted by ashsimmonds

texter - A texter is someone who both sends and receives text messages using a mobile phone, one or more. If you send text messages to cell phones from an e-mail account and get replies to that e-mail account, doing so does not make you a texter. You're still an e-mailer, not a texter -- unless you do something else that makes you a texter. {Duplicate.}

e.g., If you're still someone who goes on dates and you communicate with your date when ze is sitting in the same room you are by texting, you're neither a texter nor an e-mailer: You're an idiot. | Sandbox Jim says, "If you text while you're driving, guess what: You're an idiot." || (If you get notified by the canned e-mail message that "texter" was added to the pd lexicon, you know who wants you to call her. Please do. Thanks.)

submitted by [Sandbox Jim] - (www)

texticon - The vocabulary of text messages, including its words and expressions.

e.g., The teen's texticon was impressive, using the newest abbreviations and smiley faces in her text messages.

submitted by Jacob Nelson

texting - The act of sending a short text (SMS) message on a portable device, usually a cellular phone.

e.g., Most of the on-set crew communication was via texting on cell phones.

submitted by bristolz - (www)

textistentialism - (n.) 1. the recognition that text messaging isolates the textor from the world immediately around them, making global communication available to anyone willing to forgo their humanity by locking themselves into Coventry. 2. the feeling of abandonment you get when you realize that the person you are speaking to has lost themselves in the ecstasy of thumbing little plastic keys. (also "textistential": of our pertaining to these feelings or phenomena.)

e.g., I see people wrap themselves in the cloak of textistentialism everywhere these days: people actually shush one another so that they can keep on texting to someone all of 40 feet away. What was the point of the telephone if we're going to abandon it for telegraphy and the written word again?

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

textonym - A word produced on a device (such as a cell phone) using dictionary-driven predictive text input (such as T9) which results from the same key strokes as another word. For example, using a Nokia phone (T9 equipped), "good" is a textonym for "home" and "he" is a textonym for "if." Textonyms can be embarrassing and are becoming a bugbear for those of us who touch-type on cell phone keyboards.

e.g., Her reply to my SMS made no sense at all until I realized that "lips" and "kiss" are textonyms.

submitted by Arjen Maarleveld

textual - A large amount of text to read.

e.g., "That web site is rather textual." "That's way to textual for me." "I think I'll make it textual."

submitted by Paul

textual frustration - Emotion felt when typing out a text message on a mobile phone where all the letters of a word are located on the same key, thus making you wait ages for it to clear between each key-stroke. Reduced by fast-type systems.

e.g., Typing "high" in a text message can be a source of textual frustration.

submitted by OJ

textual harassment - When someone sends you lots at text messages (sms) on your mobile phone despite your never replying to any of them.

e.g., I swear Bob just doesn't get it. He's asked me out via text message 1000 times. It's to the point of becoming textual harassment.

submitted by Deb

textual intercourse - Texting sexual content (words) to someone else.

e.g., I did not have sexual intercourse, I had textual intercourse only.

submitted by dan

textually frustrated - The feeling you get when a friend send you a sms (text message) on your mobile phone, but you have no credit and can't reply.

e.g., I'm going to have to put some credit on my phone--I'm getting textually frustrated.

submitted by Deb

tfcing - Watching or viewing The Filipino Channel (TFC) cable television. (Most Filipinos watch "TFC.")

e.g., My grandma who came from the Philippines didn't stop tfcing, because she was homesick.

submitted by Joash Mencias

tfigel - 1. It's cold. 2. Cold.

e.g., 1. Tfigel outside. 2. It's freakin' tfigel outside!

submitted by Xander Aaxtious

th'alatel - A device for the heart.

e.g., Mrs. Jones, we have to put a th'alatel in your heart.

submitted by Dr. Gary Rothfeld - (www)

thac0 - To Hit Armor Class Zero. A really weird little Dungeons & Dragons thing that you had to figure out in the old days in order to do combat.

e.g., What's the THAC0 on that guy?

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

thack - (v., pronounced to rhyme with 'rock' (and with a voiced 'th', if possible), but can be said 'thack' to rhyme iwth 'back') 1. to create supposedly foreign or alien written language by simple transliteration of your language into the other language's alphabet; 2. to create a written language by simply making up a squiggly for each of the letters in your native alphabet; 3. to write words in your own language in another alphabet; 4. to use a current, real language in a boxen in which that language could not exist. (n.) 5. any instance of thacking, especially in television or cinema, although it is quite common in books as well. (An acronym from the initial sounds of "THey Are Coming" (/ðak/ or /¦Čak/), which appeared in the _The Fellowship of the Ring_, written in Elvish script, but plainly English words, in the record book they find in Moria.)

e.g., 1. "They are coming" is thacked in Elvish script, but English words, in _The Fellowship of the Ring_. 2. In the Dinotopia books, the sentient and generally peaceful dinosaurs have a thacked written language of footprint-combinations for each of the 26 English letters. 3. When I was in college, I thacked my financial records in Russian -- that is, English words, but Russian script -- it drove my parents and my bank nuts. 4. David Eddings thacked the language in his _Belgariad_ and _Malloreon_ series, cribbing almost entirely from English: The characters all speak English (even referring to the etymology of "shepherd" as "sheep-herder" and referring to the letter U. This despite their being on a planet located on another planet somewhere off in the vastness of the universe.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

thaid - Pronounced like "said" with a "th." Thinking what you'd rather say in a certain situation, instead of what you obviously did say.

e.g., This girl asked me if I had the time, and she was pretty hot, so I thaid, "Sure, what did you have in mind?"

submitted by Josh Allen

thanatagog or thanatagogue - thanatagog or thanatagogue, n. (Greek thanatos, death + Greek agein, to lead; cf. pedagog, demagog, mystagog) – a person who initiates into mysteries of death, who prepares old or terminally ill people for dying.

e.g., He is a thanatagog by vocation and occupation. He works at a hospice.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

thanatagogy - thanatagogy, n. (Greek thanatos, death + Greek agein, to lead; cf. pedagogy, demagogy, mystagogy) – initiation into death, preparation for dying. Thanatology is the study of death and dying; thanatagogy is a practical branch of this knowledge. The Egyptian "Book of the Dead" is the most ancient manual in thanatagogy.

e.g., For Plato, philosophy is the basis of thanatagogy. To study philosophy is nothing but to prepare oneself to die.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

thank the process - (of evolution.) "Thank God." "Of evolution" is optional.

e.g., Thank the process for gummy worms.

submitted by lauryn

thank you - What a person really means is "Go away"

e.g., "Thank you, Mr.___." (Thinking "Oh, you loser, go away."

submitted by T. Ellie Pathik

thank you, captain obvious - A statement used sarcastically or humorously whenever someone states the obvious.

e.g., "I just noticed you're wearing red shoes, Chris." "Thank you, Captain Obvious."

submitted by Aurora

thank-queue - The repetitive thanks you must offer someone when following them down a long corridor.

e.g., My mouth was dry from the thank-queue after walking through all those fire doors.

submitted by Hammerton - (www)

thank-yo - A form of thanks when receiving a completely inappropriate present from a younger relative

e.g., Thank-yo for my skateboard. I wonder if it will take the weight of my Zimmer frame?

submitted by Hammerton - (www)

thanka-vue - The feeling you've already thanked someone.

e.g., Have I said thanks for the flowers or is it just thanka-vue?

submitted by Hammerton - (www)

thankles - A condition where a person's calves are the same width as her ankles. Also see Cankles.

e.g., Check out the legs on that girl. She's got some serious thankles.

submitted by Bob

thanksgiving - (n.) Two or more turkeys (three strikes in a row) in a single bowling line. [From the need for two or more turkeys (birds) to feed a large family gathering, applied to bowling jargon.]

e.g., Six nonconsecutive strikes do not create a thanksgiving any more than three nonconsecutive strikes make a turkey.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

thanx - A short form of thank you, usually found in notes.

e.g., Please don't throw butts or gum into the urinals. Thanx or Please keep this door closed for "Health and Safety" reasons. Thanx

submitted by CJMiller

thanx - Expression of gratitude on the Isle of Manx

e.g., She expressed her thanx for his attending to her cat in Manx, and thereby hangs a tail.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tharn - Stupefied, distraught, hypnotized with fear, such as a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. From the book _Watership Down_ by Richard Adams.

e.g., When my mother opened the door, I went tharn in fear.

submitted by 'Salem - (www)

thas - Further shortening of "that's."

e.g., Thas a great idea,

submitted by Keith Burdette

that dog'll hunt - Redneck expression used to inform other rednecks that something is acceptable or will work.

e.g., Billy Bob asked Jethro what he thought of his new girlfriend, to which Jethro responded, "That dog'll hunt."

submitted by Marc Sanzenbacher

that old chestnut - Used by the workers in my company to describe a well worn excuse. (Also "an old, much-repeated joke that has long since lost any real humour" according to Jonathon Green's Dictionary of Slang.)

e.g., Bad belly again? It's like that, is it? That old chestnut?

submitted by Xnoybis

that'll learn ya! - When confused people mix "learning a lesson" and "being taught a lesson." Of course, it's most commonly used as a joke: "That'll teach you. You'll learn a lesson from that."

e.g., *A kid falls off her bike cause she's riding with no hands.* Charlie laughs and says "That'll learn ya."

submitted by Phoenix

that's the blow - That sucks.

e.g., "I have to read 8 million pages by tomorrow." "That's the blow."

submitted by lauryn

that's the ticket. - Exactly the right answer or solution. As Jon Lovitz would say on Saturday Night Live.

e.g., Heath: Chris, I've been trying all day to get the characters in the character map to appear, but I can't. I hit ALT + 0222 over and over but nothing happens. Chris: Use the number keys on the right of the keyboard. . . . Heath: Yeah, that's the ticket.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

thataway - That way. An example "of epenthesis, the addition to a word of a vowel or consonant not part of the original word." "Thisaway" and "ath-a-lete" are other examples.

e.g., Chris . . . Chris!! The elkonometer is goin' off the chart thar in every direction -- there must be at least five or ten million of 'em, let's go thataway.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

thatcher's girls - Prostitutes. From Michael Quinion: "Thatcher’s girls, from northern England, briefly appeared around 1985 to mean prostitutes, applied — so it was asserted — because her policies had driven many women to the only way left open to them to earn money." Definition-Of: "British expression, coined in the 1980s, when Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher's economic policies caused such widespread unemployment that the increase in the number of prostitutes, who defiantly called themselves 'Thatchers girls,' was significant."

e.g., "I'll be back in a minute. I'm going the chat up that beauty near the end of the bar." "Have a go at her. But keep in mind that she's a Thatcher's girl." "Eh? How do you know that?" "Mmm. . . ." | TheGuardian / politics » "Thatcherism hasn't failed: it has infected all our politics": "In 1982, the English Collective of Prostitutes occupied a church for 12 days in protest against 'police illegality and racism in King's Cross' the area to which many sex workers known as 'Thatcher's girls' had travelled from high unemployment areas in the Midlands and the north. Thatcher's passing is marked by street parties in Brixton, Belfast, Bristol, Derry, Glasgow and Liverpool, and seething bitterness among the mining families and communities she was allowed (including by scab union and Labour leaders) to destroy." | Tom Sawyer: Comprenension Check: "The beautiful new girl was most likely a. a friend of Amy Lawrence. b. his sister Mary's friend. c. Joe Harper's sister. d. Judge Thatcher's girl." [It's a joke.] | Bangor Daily News - Oct 6, 1983 » "Group begins campaign to repeal prostitution laws": "Some prostitutes, she said, are victims of cuts In welfare and are known on the street as 'Reagan's girls' in the United States and 'Thatcher's girls' in Britain." | Peter Lindelauf: "Only in England could a Thatcher's girl child become PM." | BBC Blogs » "How can the Libyan conflict be resolved?": "It's certainly time for the big boys [and no dought Thatcher's Girls] to wade in and appropriate whatever they can while Nu Bkue Labour and the Lib dems look on approvingly [cue good time tobury bad news, chortle; snigger, snigger;smirk, smirk]." | TheyWorkForYou.com » "Orders of the Day — Sexual Offences Bill": "In the King's Cross study it was shown that there were two types of prostitutes operating: those who worked in the evening and organised by pimps, and those who worked during the day, who were basically 'freelance.' Virtually all the arrests were made during the daytime. There were some suggestions that that might show a degree of favouritism and bias by the police. Interestingly, the professional prostitutes, who had a much longer track record, referred to the new prostitutes — women who were just working one or two days a week in the afternoons — as 'Thatcher's girls', because they had been forced into prostitution by a decline in income, lost jobs, or because their social security payments had not kept up with inflation. If the hon. Member for Streatham produced a Bill that tackled the social causes, we could perhaps end prostitution, but instead we are talking about a further scale of repression." | Reclaim the Night Speeches » Discussion, Chat and Gossip » slightlyspikeygirl:  I just don't think it's at all a simplistic, polarised, either/or issue: nature/nurture, biology/culture.   Men have higher testosterone; testosterone has been linked to violence, sexual aggession. That doesn't mean it's just testosterone operating — I read a theory today that boys who are violent in the classroom have particularly low cortisol levels — possibly as a result of inadequate attachment/ brutal parenting as infants — 'nurture' producing 'nature.' There's probably a complex mix of biological reasons why men are more violent — not just T.  Chicken/egg? — maybe.  But it may still be true.    And of course a complex mix of cultural reasons as well.  Women on average have better language skills — writing as a male-dominated field until the C17 for purely cultural reasons.    However, if it was purely cultural, there'd be cultures where women were dominant, more violent, politically in control.  Large-scale, there just aren't.     And the sex work industry we have now is a product of that male-dominated culture. I don't think anyone's advocating the industry as it is: people are talking about making it more equal, working for women's rights within the industry, respecting that women can and do choose to go into it, saying it's more complex than just victimisation.    --- Quote from: Kate B on Nov 27, 2007, 10:00:15 PM --- And for every woman who does choose, there are many others for whom it is quite clearly not a choice at all — it's either explicitly forced on therm or it's a matter of bald economic facts. Remember the term 'Thatcher's girls'? And what of the children? This burgeoning industry involves more and more children of both sexes. It's all but impossible to 'pick 'n' mix' in this, after all. Is some of it acceptable and some not? How do you legislate for such complexities? --- End quote ---   You say that the involvement of minors is illegal?  You legalise the industry? Recognise unions?  Work (obviously) for greater career choices in deprived areas? Better education? More support and protection for those who choose to work within it? Step up the fight against people-traffickers?  Protect women who have been illegally brought into the country to work in brothels?  The fact that it's complex doesn't mean you can't legislate for it.   --- Quote from: Kate B on Nov 27, 2007, 10:00:15 PM ---I know you're not implying that biology makes male aggression acceptable — I'm not suggesting that. But I do think the whole 'biological facts' theory is trotted out all too often in a way that tends to favour the status quo, rather than a push towards change. --- End quote ---   But that's a problem with the reception of the argument, not with the argument itself.  So there is a strong biological component? Let's take that into account when we devise social policy, not pretend it doesn't exist. | YOGMAEL — The Unofficial George Michael Mailing List — Issue # 216: "It is kinda interesting that George, a Tony Blair fan, is getting. chummy with one of Thatcher's Girls.'" | "Kings Cross As A Historic Red Light Area": "The station itself had its fame as the arrival of people coming to seek a better life in London from the rest of the country, and there's a whole mythoogy about people doing that and falling into a life of sin! Not to mention the tales of 'Thatcher's girls' coming down from the recession-hit areas of Britain to make a few bob on the game in London and by all accounts even doing so on the trains themselves!" |

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

thawed out - Newly excelent, suprisingly good.

e.g., I thought it was going to be a terrible movie. I was pleasantly surprised when it turned out to be thawed out.

submitted by Prabro

thayerism - "The self-righteous unrighteousness of established people," coined by H. G. Wells, and cited in Sacco and Vanzetti: The Men, the Murders, and the Judgment of Mankind, Watson, Bruce, pp 116-117 -- a reflection on the rationalized mental attitude of Webster Thayer, judge in the Sacco & Vanzetti murder trial.

e.g., All institutions, however well-intended originally, sink to Thayerism, run by people who think their bureaucracies are the instruments of the Divinity.

submitted by Robert DiGrazia

the *noun* fairy - Mythical being responsible for the delivery of an object that is is obviously too ludicrous to have been delivered by said being. In reference to the tooth fairy.

e.g., I was a good little girl and the piano fairy brought me a brand new Steinway.

submitted by EggieChan

the *noun* gnomes - Mythical beings responsible for the malfunction or disappearance of the object mentioned.

e.g., Eggie. My computer keeps giving me a blue screen. Chan. The computer gnomes must be chewing on your cables.

submitted by EggieChan

the 602 - Any run-of-the-mill, basic-looking tavern which will usually have a mix of "regulars" and the curious (usually collegians) among its clients. (Dervied from the name of a now-closed tavern in Madison, WI, by name The 602 Club, which has since gained a sort of cult status, notably allusions on "Star Trek Enterprise.")

e.g., "I'll just head over to The 602 for a game or two of sheepshead with the boys."

submitted by Larry Ellis Reed - (www)

the big ego - New York or New Yorkers, for the city whose residents refer to it as The Big Apple. Suggested anew by someone writing of Michael Phelps, after he won 8 gold medals at the 2008 Beijing Olympics: After 8 gold medals in Beijing, huge sponsor deals likely for Michael Phelps Here's a guy who refused to let anyone or anything stop him from becoming A-No.-1 in the world. No, he's not a New Yorker, but he's got the spirit. How fitting it would be for the world's greatest city to extend official congratulations to the young man with the greatest record in Olympic history.

e.g., Jesus, now the celebrity-worshipping residents of The Big Ego are getting the notion that Michael Phelps's success as a swimmer is something they should get to share or take credit for -- as if only New Yorkers have what it takes to be winners. Damn Yankees.    Seems to me the only people who have any business at all wanting to lay claim to any reflected glory should be those from 200 miles to the southwest of New York.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

the breasts - The Breasts, in the context of entertainment media, refer to a female character who transparently only exists as eye candy or as a romantic interest for a major male character. Typically followed by "of the film," "of the show" etc. as appropriate. The Breasts of the Film is often as two-dimensional as she is incompetent.

e.g., "So, who do you reckon will turn out to be The Breasts of the Film?" asked Alphonse. "My vote is for her," said Bordois, indicating a scantily-clad character. "She's managed to lose four items of clothing already and we're only fifteen minutes in."

submitted by ddelderayx

the c-word - Competition.

e.g., "Being a class valedictorian is no big deal, of course, but whatever it's worth shouldn't be diminished the way it was in an Ohio school district last year. Apparently, so no one's feelings would be hurt, the district named 222 students as class valedictorians. For whatever reason, competition has become a bad word in the United States. Henceforth, I'm going to refer to it as the c-word."

submitted by Lillith

the clinton fund "a" tion\ - Set up under the guise of a tax-favored charitable foundation, this money pit has been a factor in providing funds, like $1 million speaking engagements, for ex-president Bill, and his wife, Hillary's, private life style.

e.g., The Clinton Fund "A" tion annual audit reports that just 15% of revenue gets distributed in charitable grants; 60% in "undisclosed expenses" -- hey, what's to disclose?

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

the clutches - Descriptive noun for the feeling or predicament you're in where it seems you're so far behind in your work, chores, obligations, and the like that you'll never get caught back up.

e.g., My girl been home sick so long now, and I got no helper, and folks keep calling me with more work, and now I'm sick and missing work, and the bad weather has some jobs shut down. . . . Sakes . . . I'm in the clutches.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

the crawl - What some describe as spiders in their heads (usually while the world around them sleeps). An affliction often associated with chronic insomnia and symptomatic as follows: insomnia, easily distracted, fidgitry, nonsensical talk, self-absorption, spells of introspect, difficulty communicating with others, and a plethora of others. (Please if you suffer from this incurable panacea, list any symptoms you benefit from here, so a complete compendium can be compiled.)

e.g., The crawl often subsides with me around 3-4 am.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

the crust rot - Any heinous unknown ailment.

e.g., Stayed home today, got the crust rot.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

the death throws of political correctness will not be pretty. st - The death throws of Political Correctness will not be pretty. Stand by.

e.g., The death throws of Political Correctness will not be pretty. Stand by.

submitted by The death throws of Political Correctnes

the glock is ticking - Intended to suggest that someone is so pissed off that she's about ready to shoot someone.

e.g., Politics has become so filled with antagonism in this presidential election that I fear the Glock is ticking. Truly, I'll be surprised if there isn't an assassination attempt in the offing for whoever takes over the Presidency on January 20.

submitted by HD Fowler

the grey - A Greyhound bus.

e.g., I'm taking The Grey to Calgary.

submitted by Jen

the h is o - Short form of the "The Heat is ON." Taken from the title of a Glenn Frey song. Also used on a Saturday Night Live sketch.

e.g., Rich: "Albert, you're screwed. You have a 1-page essay due tomorrow that you haven't started yet." Albert: "Yeah, I know. The H is O."

submitted by natmac

the ham sandwich - To give someone the ham sandwich is to fire her.

e.g., Fred was so disappointed in Terry's job performance that he gave her the ham sandwich last Monday.

submitted by Michael Mason

the hay - What you hit when you go to bed.

e.g., Well it's about time for me to hit the hay.

submitted by Brandon Ducharme

the heir and the spare - British expression: The Princes Willam and Harry, respectively.

e.g., The press has backed off the heir and the spare in the publicity wake following Diana's death.

submitted by Stephen Mize

the judge reinhold special - To get extremely drunk. Based on a rumor that in his heyday Judge Reinhold could put away three Colt .45s a day, enough to get a normal person drunk, and still manage to perform all his lines flawlessly on set.

e.g., Come on guys, it's Friday, Put away your books and let's get the Judge Reinhold Special.

submitted by natmac

the man - An authority figure, such as a principal, boss, mayor, etc.

e.g., The man caught me skipping class again.

submitted by JoE

the monkey problem - Heard on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. When a candidate has no chance of winning, you ask her "What will you do about the monkey problem?" implying that the day she's elected, monkeys will fly out of her butt and it will be a messy problem.

e.g., So, Ms. Sharptinich, when you're elected, what are you going to do about the monkey problem?

submitted by uncajohn

the ness - That certain "je ne sais quoi" that a person has that makes you go, "Wow, that's one cool guy!" when you see him. If someone has The Ness, you instantly want to be friends with him. Originated from a lack of description for a friend: "She's got this... coolness. Weirdness. Amazingness. It's just a... a -ness!"

e.g., "Look at him! He's got The Ness." "I used to have the Ness, but I think I've lost it."

submitted by Miranda

the norm - The butt-crack, which, as near as I can tell, has been unnamed until now.

e.g., Eeew, I think I'm gonna hurl. You're exposing your hairy norm.

submitted by beelzebub

the o'dark thirties - The middle of the night. Roughly, the hours between midnight and 6 am. From pilots who fly air freight, usually late at night.

e.g., We worked until the o'dark thirties getting our software presentation together. I know we'll all sleep when it's over -- if not before.

submitted by Paul

the online etymology dictionary - Eventually intend to be able to search several dictionaries from here, at which point the lexicon entry will be changed to something more generic.

e.g., Search the OtED: Search Mode Natural Language Find single term Find any term Find exact phrase

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

the ord mandell factor - The added depth given to books and films by referencing unseen events. Comes from "That bounty hunter we ran into on Ord Mandell" from _The Empire Strikes Back_.

e.g., _The Hobbit_ is great. Tolkein brings the Ord Mandell factor into full force.

submitted by Adam Leslie

the other f-word - Faggot. See oppithet.

e.g., From "Chris Selley: Broadcast Standards ruling on Money for Nothing a comedy classic":The first hint you’re in for something special is when the report announces it will refer to the naughty word in question as "the other f-word." No, I thought, you’re not going to do that. You say you are, but you aren’t. It would be too stupid to take seriously. But then, there it was, over and over again: "There was little or no argument made in favour of the public acceptability of the other f-word"; "members of the audience might be offended by the use of the other f-word." Incredible. . . .    The point at which I finally leaned back for a good, old-fashioned, two-minute belly laugh was when [the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council] decided to consider the "context" of the use of the other f-word in Money for Nothing. . . .    The people who wrote this poorly argued, leaden, grandiloquent document wouldn’t know "a light and genuine touch" if it slapped them in the face. They got the decision right, at least. But there was no case to be made against Money for Nothing in the first place. This colossal waste of time ought to be remembered as the last of its kind.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

the package - U.S. Secret Service jargon for the person being protected at any given time.

e.g., The Veep was the package for that evening so we had a relatively large detail.

submitted by Stephen Mize

the pen-stealing goblin - Mythological creature who lives in a large grotto in the centre of the earth where he keeps every misplaced or lost ball-point pen in the history of mankind. Think about it, he HAS to exist--it's the only plausible explanation. Cousin to the sock goblin.

e.g., Pointy-headed Boss: Why doesn't anyone have a pen? I bought a box of 50 yesterday. Wally: The Pen-stealing Ggblin must'a got them.

submitted by the_other_giuliani

the people - 1. Rhetoric for a politician's constituency -- voters, particularly the poor, the underprivileged, the handicapped, and all those whose causes need governmental action and support. 2. Reality -- a limited group including the politician, his or her family members, relatives, individual, and corporate large financial contributors, staff, lobbuyists (cf.) and assorted others who presently, or may in the future, help the politician with some favor or benefit.

e.g., "My personal and political lives are devoted to serving The People, 24 hours a day" was the motto of a well-known politician. Fortunately, he's "serving" the same amount of time in a Federal prison for the next ten years as payment for his actions.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

the place for ribs - A hip place, the coolest spot in town.

e.g., You were at the Skylark on Friday night? That joint's the place for ribs.

submitted by burner

the pma - An organization started by Dr. Alec Maguire (musicologist and bartender) that critiques music. Organization faves are Blue Rodeo, Toad My Wet Sprocket, and anything with Accordion.

e.g., I heard that the PMA gave the new Blue Rodeo record 5 Stars.

submitted by Levy9

the puzzle palace - Washington DC expression, the National Security Agency.

e.g., Has the Puzzle Palace decrypted the communications we intercepted yesterday?

submitted by Stephen Mize

the rhine in spine - loys minely in the Pline. A variation of Mr 'Iggens practice phrase, now to teach others 'ow to speak Cockney, if possible.

e.g., I think they've got it, by jove! The Rhine in Spine -- does make me wonder 'ow close the river and the plain might be?

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

the s - A superior being whose sole purpose in life is to rub in her superiority to other human beings.

e.g., Don't mess with The S.

submitted by Bobby

the side eye - When someone is suspicious of something, she can turn her head at said thing, and look at it through her peripheral vision. This conveys suspicion.

e.g., I was just walking down the dorm hall, and this girl I passed gave me the side eye. I guess she's suspicious of me, probably thinks I want to jump her.

submitted by Aaron Firth

the sisterhood of firekeepers - In the primitive days of the cavemen, sustaining a controlled fire was a difficult process. Over the years, a position of Firekeeper evolved, and was entrusted to a society of women, The Sisterhood of Firekeepers. Young girls were chosen at an early age, trained for years, remained unmarried, and spent their entire lives dedicated to the care and protection of the tribal hearth.    If a calamitous event ever occurred, and a fire did go out, a Sister in distress would send a courier, with a large clay pot, to a neighboring village. Her Sister there was bound by oath to send back the elements of a replacement fire.

e.g., It was a severe winter for a mountaintop caveman community. The Firekeeper, a Sister named Mae, woke up early one morning, and found to her horror that a storm had blown a huge amount of snow in, and completely extinguished the tribal fire. Her nearest Sister, Dee, lived in a neighboring mountain tribe some miles away.    The quickest route was along a mountain trail. But because of the treacherous ice, snow, slippery rocks, and bad weather, the tribal Elders counseled Mae to send a courier down the mountain, and through the wooded valley terrain, a much longer and time-consuming distance, but safer.    Mae thought a moment and spoke. "We are in great danger," she said. "Our sacred Fire burns the dark; its brightness keeps away the beasts that hungrily prowl the night." "Mother Fire wraps us in heat, and keeps warm our babies, the sick and our old ones," she continued. "The strength of our Fire softens the meat we hunt, the grain we pick, and the roots we dig from the soil, and makes them food to keep us healthy and full."    Mae looked up at the Elders. " Unless we get new Fire quickly we will all die; as dangerous as the mountain trail is, for the safety of our tribe, we must send a group of couriers along that path." "As we know," she continued, shaking her head slowly and sadly, "Forest's a long, long time, from Mae to Dee's ember."

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

the skinny - The truth about something. A precise definition. A set of explicit instructions. The latest news.

e.g., What's the skinny about getting this contraption to work?

submitted by Steve McDonald

the smile - The three-point line.

e.g., Zac fires one up from behind the smile . . . and it's good for three points. Talk about lucky.

submitted by zac perkins - (www)

the snorks - When grass in a field or park is wet from rain.

e.g., Don't cut through the park, it's gonna be the snorks.

submitted by Danielle

the sooner the quicker - As soon as possible, ASAP. Same meaning as "the quicker the sooner."

e.g., Do it now, the sooner the quicker.

submitted by Ted borzak

the streisand effect - "The Streisand effect is the phenomenon whereby an attempt to hide, remove, or censor a piece of information has the unintended consequence of publicizing the information more widely, usually facilitated by the Internet."

e.g., "The Streisand Effect is now in play."

submitted by [Brad5] - (www)

the taste that rocks my face - Phrase commonly used after tasting something gooder than good.

e.g., Kate's strawberry lip gloss has the taste that rocks my face.

submitted by Robert L. Miller III - (www)

the the - The. Being the anal retentive I am, I am very careful about making typographical errors. Nevertheless, I found 37 entries containing the the in the pd: 16 in descriptions and 21 in examples (not including the the the entry itself. (Did you notice my deliberate use of three consecutive the's?) There were also many files on my hard drive with the the the typo, not all of them mine -- plus, some were duplicated from one file to another. When I entered the the into the lexicon previously, there were only 10 typos. I must be slipping. (Forgot to put spaces before and after the the, so I turned up no typos in the pd after all. The actual count of typos on my hard drive was 39.) The previous entry has been updated in the example below.

e.g., Previous description: Exactly the same thing as the by itself. Found most often at the the end of a line and the the start of the the next line. Now that it's been defined in an online dictionary, it's no longer necessary for me to check for it as a typographical error. Previous example: A search of the the PseudoDictionary turned up 10 instances of the the the typo. Six were in the the descriptions and four were in the the the examples. | To hear a man refer to his wife as "my old lady" bothers me. I consider it to be a misogynistic designation not far removed linguistically from "my bitch." I see it as terminology that demeans and insults not only the man’s wife, but women in general. Not as bad as the the cheaper designations mentioned, but bad enough. That’s my bitch's my wife’s opinion, too, and my son's. Why not just "my wife"?

submitted by HD Fowler

the tool - Hammer, especially when used to destroy an item that has not responded to reasonable requests to repair itself; usually requiring the use of The Tool, Part II (i.e., credit card) to replace said item. (See"barbarian method.")

e.g., We knew to put on safety goggles when Dad went to go get The Tool. Later, Mother had to use The Tool, Part II, to buy us new bicycles.

submitted by Claire Grove Stone - (www)

the trhumph! presidential campaign - An explosive reaction to the campaigning conduct of the 2016 Republican presidential candidate, Donald Trump.

e.g., For most of the Republican "faithful," the persistent mutterings from the stubbornly egotistic candidate of the TrHumph! Presidential Campaign elicit repeated depressing reactions ranging from raised eyebrows to bewildered head shakes, and finally to shrieks of despair.

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

the virgin merely - Totally without (intimate, or other) experience or knowledge.

e.g., Her mother was also the virgin merely, both saving themselves for their husbands to be.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

the void - The empty feeling when you lack the physical contact from a relationship.

e.g., Rebound relationships satisfy the void. Now that I broke up with my significant other, the void is consuming me. "I was with that person to fill the void. It wasn't serious"

submitted by sorakirei - (www)

the wainwright phenomenon | machiavellean speculation, - What accounts for our experiencing that time seems to pass faster as we grow older. It's not necessarily that our contemporaneous experience of time is that it seems to pass faster -- to me, a twenty-four hour day still seems to last as long as it ever has -- but that our memory of an event that took place years ago causes us to think, "Has it really been that long since that happened?" And, of course, the pseudocorollary says that when we go back to see places we experienced as a child, we will think, "Wow, this place seemed a lot larger when I was growing up."

e.g., "Mary Beth, have you noticed how much smaller Old Main seems to be than it was when we went to high school?" "I have. Mike, it's the Wainwright Phenomenon again. ... Besides,the building is no longer there. It was torn down about thirty years ago. Hadn't you noticed? «Unabridged»

submitted by machiavellean - (www)

the zacklies - What you have the morning after a good party. From "exactly," in the sense of "my mouth tastes exactly like my butt this morning."

e.g., You got a coke? I got a bad case of the zacklies this morning.

submitted by Swami

the-ff - "The" combined with the suffix "ff." Used where "the" precedes a potential "f-word," when the person speaking stops herself from completing the "f-word" in question, usually followed by a brief pause.

e.g., 1. Solomon: Hey. your girlfriend is giving the gardener a back rub. Tyler: What the-ff? 2. Teacher: Now, why would Don Quixote want to kill another man for merely touching his armor? Student: Because he's a lunatic. The-ff...crazy person.

submitted by Jonathan Charles Wright

the-sgusting - More than disgusting.

e.g., That chocolate milk at lunch looked like chocolate cottage chesse. It was the-sgusting.

submitted by the-sgusting

theartice - To entice another to accompany oneself to a theatre.

e.g., He tried to theartice me by offering me popcorn.

submitted by Stoffle

theasles - Marks resembling a rash left on the skin from pressing against a textured surface.

e.g., When I awoke from my nap, I discovered the bedspread had made theasles on my face.

submitted by Nonesuch

thee allah ji - (Sounds like: theology.) In addressing God, may be used to begin a prayer or speak to the Eternal One.

e.g., Thee Allah ji, let us be peaceful and slow to anger, neither attacking nor harming anyone, now rational and constructive and progressing in a world that appreciates wholesome change, change for the better.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

thee allah ji had - ########## Past tense of Paul Edic's "thee allah ji."

e.g., Thee Allah ji had, let us NOT be peaceful nor slow to anger, attacking and harming anyone, however rational and constructive and progressive in a world that does not appreciate wholesome change, change for the better. We'll show THEM whose God is the right God.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

theflag - A mythical software feature which allows developers to solve any problem just by changing TheFlag.

e.g., Hey . . . we just need you to change TheFlag so all new users who sign up get a 10% discount. Can you also update TheFlag so these users get a 30-day trial if they sign up for a membership?

submitted by stennie - (www)

theiatry - God-healing religion created by me.

e.g., All are invited to participate in services with Rev. Sunshine and the Original Church of Theiatry.

submitted by Mozella R. Sunshine

theire - Their + there, for those who misspell "their" -- or don't know when to use "their" and when to use "there." Also thier, thiere. Examples will include uses of "their" when a singular possessive pronoun ("his" or "her") is clearly called for.

e.g., Theire she goes again, trying to help us use English properly. Don't she know? Most submitters doesn't care whether or not theire language use is sub-standard. They just want to be able to tell theire fiends they got a new word published in an online dictionary. | "newboy3, August 29, 2011 at 5:17PM: Are we really this stupid? Is the measure of 'a crime' really what the criminal 'nets'? This animal attacked, with guns, [a 73-year-old man]; beat them; and then robbed them. If I were the judge, the beasts would have been sentenced to life. Next time, these two jackals are likely to kill someone.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

theirloveissodestined - A rush of words smooshed into one word describing how you feel about a couple.

e.g., Will and Grace are just perfect for each other, theirloveissodestined. Why is he gay?

submitted by Tamar Pacht

theirself - Herself, himself, themselves. A misuse.

e.g., "People who spend a lot of time tsk-tsking over other people's bad behavior are usually trying to deflect attention away from their own. Often the person whose attention they most want to deflect is theirself." (From the linked site.)

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

thelcome - A reply to a complimentary "thank you," where both "thank you" and "you're welcome" seem appropriate responses. [Blend of "thank you" and "you're welcome"]

e.g., She said, "Thanks so much! You're such a wonderful person!" "Thelcome," I replied.

submitted by Kevin Sullivan

thelp - A red mark that shows up after a whelping.

e.g., My back was thelping after the stick touched it.

submitted by Ash

themself - ########## Used in place of "himself" or "herself" or "themselves." Used when emphasizing that the person being discussed is a singular person. It's not a real word, of course. |   The singular form of themselves, I suppose. Needed by the politically correct who are afraid to use masculine personal pronouns, especially to refer to a neutral antecedent. Because of the lack of number agreement, don't count on entries such as this getting past our editors' red pencils. . . . Oh, that's right. Red penciling is out. Some student might be made to feel bad -- not "feel badly."

e.g., That's funny enough to make someone wet themself. | John, Tuscon: "I bet some of these folks did not care for the homes and now a lawyer who wants to make a name for themself, is convincing these folks that they will get lots of money." John is certainly making a name for himself -- as an idiot. |   Hilariocious description, as submitted by "nate": "Funny to the point of making one laugh very heartily, roll around on the floor in laughter, laugh until one cries or wets themself." |    "Given that science can only answer for things like 'what' and 'how' the scientist who speaks in terms of ' invisible skyfriend' (or whatever) robs themselves of this component by not going further and truly exploring inquiries such as 'why.'"    "One of my Twitter trolls reinvented themselves and said: 'I'll always be here to bother you.'" |    From a Paul Edic example. (Mr. Edic knows what he's doing.) "Oleo first appeared commercially in stores in the late 1940s as a cheap substitute for butter. Butter manufacturers insisted that it not look too much like yellow butter, so oleo appeared only white to purchase. Soon though a color capsule was included in the package, so that a consumer could manually add color themself. Eventually you could buy ordinary colored oleo, or margarine, in the store."

submitted by n8saffle | [Phineas Pedant] - (www)

then - Than. I see then used on the Internet when the word should be than. Until I made a ytpo a couple of minutes ago, I thought it happened because the writer didn't know the word to use. Now I've decided most of the occurrences may be due to keying errors.

e.g., Better then Democrat Underground, DailyKos, HuffPo, Media Matters, MoveOn....

submitted by Miss Speller

then the pig flew - Statement made in reference to a predicted event that never occurred.

e.g., 1. It was supposed to snow today. Then the pig flew. 2. Y2K was supposed to cut off our electricity, and shut down entire computer systems. Then the pig flew.

submitted by Paul

theocrazy - Theocracy.

e.g., A Rick Santorum Presidency would be too close to a theocrazy for me.

submitted by HD Fowler

theoentertainmentology - The discipline that argues that a divine being guides and approves of entertainment choices.

e.g., My theoentertainmentology argues that if God didn't want me to watch Battlestar Galactica, season four, She wouldn't have invented streaming instant play.

submitted by Mark Lee - (www)

theomonism - From Greek theos, God, and Greek monos, one. Unity in God, the integration of various religious traditions achieved through their common faith in one God, in the oneness of God. As a term, theomonism is the reversal of the term monotheism, and is believed to be its historical outcome.

e.g., There are three major stages in the religious development of humanity. Many gods, many faiths: polytheism. One God, many faiths: monotheism -- such as Judaism, Christianity, and Islam. One God, one faith: theomonism. Monotheistic religions share faith in one God that ultimately will lead them to unity: from monotheism to theomonism. The further various faiths proceed to their common goal, the closer they are to each other.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

theophilawstory - Theology, philosophy, law, and history. The four inescapable areas of life that make up one's world-view.

e.g., All thought begins from a religious presupposition. Your predetermined thought patterns can be summed up as theophilawstory. From the mouth the heart speaks.

submitted by Christopher J. Fry

theorapy - Psychological combined with religious (theological) counseling.

e.g., Jolene Broadwood, Canada, paraphrased: "Theorapy isn't enough. A long sentence in with the general prison population is what they should get, considering what they've done to innocent children."

submitted by Miss Speller

theorhetorical - Concerning a suppositional statement not based on facts and made purely for effect (with a religious context).

e.g., The very idea that climate change is not affected by humans is strictly theorhetorical (G-d damn it!).

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

theoricide - (n.) (thi-OR-uh-side) (when discussing fiction such as video games or novels) 1. A person who has a tendency to respond to arguments or points in a debate with "Who cares?" or an equivalent, thereby defeating the purpose of the debate and often killing it. 2. The action of committing such a response. (Etymology: Greek theoros [theory, belief] + -cide, from Latin caedere [to kill].)

e.g., On World of Warcraft chat, Daniel came across Ellen, whom he considered to be a theoricide. Whenever Daniel asked why his character took so long to gain experience, Ellen would reply, "C'mon, he's just data."

submitted by Mirakle B.

theosophical - Fundamental beliefs of a religious nature.

e.g., His theosophical position is that the Earth was created in six days and on the seventh day God rested.

submitted by Eric Hall

theotesology - The scriptural study concerning the Revelation of the Godhead.

e.g., He is a theotesologian.

submitted by Sherry

therapissed - Angry at one's psychologist, counselor, etc. Therapissed off.

e.g., I'm so therapissed, I'm gonna stop spending money on therapy and get a dog. | Yeah, I'm pissed. Therapissed. I've been in therapy for nine months now and I still don't know whether being crazy led to the drugs or the drugs led to being crazy. I wanna scream.

submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon - (www)

therapize - Transitive verb to indicate the action of a therapist doing her work with a patient.

e.g., I have three patients this afternoon, and even before lunch I have to therapize Mrs. Johnson.

submitted by Joe

therapy - Cigarette-smoking sessions that must be conducted in a designated place.

e.g., I drove by the office building and saw a bunch of workers having some therapy outside.

submitted by ditnis

therapy fodder - A self-affirming way of describing something really awful that happened -- you're going to have something to talk to your psychologist about. (Note: This actual phrase is used by maybe five people on the face of the earth. It's a good explanation for my URL though.)

e.g., Yeah, so my boyfriend just dumped me. Ah well, it's all therapy fodder.

submitted by keyla - (www)

there is no ass - To be said sarcastically when somebody says something very philosophical. From The Story of Us.

e.g., Nicky: Or time is falling away, like sand; the tighter you grasp it, the more it flows through your fingers. Lauryn: Ooooh, there is no ass.

submitted by lauryn

thermalation - A cross between insulation and thermal material.

e.g., Those shades will be a great source of thermalation for the cold weather.

submitted by Amadee D

thermaphobia - The fear of being in an unsutable climate such as killer heat or killer cold.

e.g., People who love hot climates sometimes have thermaphobia for cold climates.

submitted by RC3

thermasm - The pleasure felt when you are cold and immerse yourself in a hot tub.

e.g., I sunk into the hot water and felt a thermasm.

submitted by jtgd

thermo-dymanameter - Your leg, when you stick it out from under the sheets in bed because you are too hot.

e.g., During the summer, Lucy uses her thermo-dymanameter to cool off.

submitted by Margaret Andrews

thermofooled - For a sudden painful realization that the object just taken from the oven is in fact too hot to handle.

e.g., "Owww!" screamed Marie Curie. "That three-necked round bottomed flask fairly thermofooled me."

submitted by Aoife

thermonuclear catastrophe resistant long-underwear - What you need if the nukes start falling.

e.g., Got my compass, eighty pounds of dry beans and rice, a tunnel under my house to a cave, and my thermonuclear catastrophe resistant long-underwear.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

thermonucleus wonderwear - Subatomic furnaces warm your every pore, impossible to be cold, even in beautiful (please visit) Siberia, fellow travelers.

e.g., From the brilliant minds of Russki genius yet another significant breakthrough in human comfort and safety. Thermonucleus wonderwear will wear like steel, made to last in any blast, Arctic or nuclear.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

thermopetraubalt - The loss of your toes, due to frostbite in the 4th degree.

e.g., Jeff has thermopetraubalt, and he ain't happy.

submitted by Joannah Biolva

thermoresiduum - The residual heat created by a person or warm-blooded animal lingering upon a piece of furniture, which is in turn felt by another person.

e.g., After Sally's dog Fritz got off the recliner, she sat down to find it pre-warmed and cozy from thermoresiduum.

submitted by Agapeist

thesarvo - This afternoon. (Aussie slang)

e.g., Wotcha doin' thesarvo? Goin' to a barbie?

submitted by Jon Nermut

thesauri - article, articles, buzz word, buzz words, buzzwords, coinage, coinages, coined word, coined words, colloquial, colloquialism, colloquialisms, confusable, confusible, define, definition, definitions, dialect, dialects, dictionairy, dictionaries, dictionary, dictionery, ebonics, English, English usage, essay, essays, etymologies, etymology, glossaries, glossary, grammar, idiom, idioms, jargon, language, languages, lexicographer, lexicography, lexicology, lexicon, lexicons, lingo, meaning, mispeling, misspelling, misspellings, neologism, neologisms, new word, new words, slang, spelling, thesauri, thesaurus, thesauruses, vernacular, vocabulary, webspeak, word, word of the day, words, wotd, you name it™.

submitted by

thesaurize - To replace a word with a synonym.

e.g., To avoid plagiarism, I thesaurized every fourth word in my essay.

submitted by Lenny - (www)

they - 1. A suspicious group of people, a government, cult, or supernatural beings who are behind something that has happened. Also "them." | 2. The third-person singular neuter pronoun (that is, the pronoun for someone whose gender you don't know, is irrelevant, or could be either male or female). This is the pronoun every English-speaker uses but everyone is afraid of (generally because of their junior high school teacher docking them points for “lack of number agreement.”) A colloquial replacement for the (far more formal and sometimes awkward) he or she (or she or he), which sounds like a sneeze. Includes “they,” “them,” “their,” and “themself” — or “themselves,” if you're a purist. (Although, if you're a purist, you probably won't like this entry anyway.)    (ED. I'm a purist, but I definitely like the entry. See her. Nota bene: As a pedant|purist, I'm going to resist using they as a singular pronoun. When multiple dictionaries I regard highly all identify the word as a singular pronoun, I may reconsider my stance. May.)    Sometimes referred to as "singular they": used instead of the gendered singular pronouns "he" and "she" in sentence predicates to refer to ungendered antecedents, regardless of number. I'm not ready to give up my fight for subject-predicate number agreement, but that time may be getting closer when even federal judges use the form in their writing. Chances are good that I'll never willingly go along with the use of "they" when the sex of the antecedent is made clear. Why introduce ambiguity where none exists?    CMOS Q&A: Q. Does the sentence "The historian has several sources at their disposal" make a proper use of the word their? Can it not be argued that the use of their in this sentence is acceptable to maintain gender neutrality?   A. Although many language writers and linguists accept the use of their as a gender-neutral singular, conservative editors will reword, especially when itďż˝s so easy: Historians have several sources at their disposal. (Or better: Several sources are available to historians.)

e.g., 1. "Dave, did you hear about the alien abduction?" "Yes, Bill, it was … them." | Oh, my God, they killed Kenny. | 2. “Who was that on the phone?” “They didn’t say.” | “Remember, don’t start CPR on someone until you’ve checked their neck for a pulse.” | {ED. "'The goal here,' Shirley writes in the preface, 'is to make the reader readers feel as if they are experiencing the day-to-day events as they unfolded. Some historians don’t like to go into the arduous tasks of going through thousands of newspapers, preferring instead to rely on those bits and pieces of news reporting they may glean from other books. I did, and consequently the reader readers will find stories and information from the month of December 1941 they have never heard before.'" See how easy it is to recast sentences for antecedent-pronoun agreement. “What if I’m going to give mouth-to-nostril resuscitation to a cat that isn’t breathing?” “I’m not sure, but I think the same thing may apply. Click on your hyperlink for a reference to a book that may tell you.” | The Eleventh Circuit judges make a persuasive case: “The government's position amounts to an argument that the mere fact of an individual’s existence substantially affects interstate commerce, and therefore Congress may regulate them at every point of their life. This theory affords no limiting principles in which to confine Congress's enumerated power.”}

submitted by Erik | Scott M. Ellsworth | HD Fowler - (www)

they'ren't - A double contraction of "they," "are," and "not."

e.g., I hope they'ren't too late to save the world from those silly robots.

submitted by Dr. Science

thh - Acronym, short for "tee hee hee," used to express a positive response to humor. Similar to "lol," but more erudite.

e.g., Daniel: A man walks into a bar. Ouch. Danielle: THH.

submitted by Daniel

thick - Apart from the more common definitions, used to describe a woman who is heavy, but not fat, and still pretty. All round in the right spots.

e.g., "I wicked liked that chick I met last night. She's tall with a great body, and a real cutie. She's not skinny, but not fat either. . . . I dunno, she's just kinda like thick, ya know?" "So's Michelle. Except for the great body and real cutie parts."

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

thickbook - Expensive and big software tutorial books that based their thickness on boring and non-intuitive presentation of contents. Such as your typical Whatever-For-The-Web kind of books. Tutorial books that remind you of bio or chemistry text.

e.g., That Flash thickbook is so crappy I couldn't learn anything from it. I fell a sleep every time I read it.

submitted by Henry - (www)

thier - Their. Could well be one of the most common misspellings on the internet. Some 13,600,000 hits from googling "thier." The URL contains the misspelling, too.

e.g., No wonder this is the first hit: "16 Cars Run On Thier Left Tyres Only." The video shows just what the quotation says -- cars being driven only on thier driver side tires. I'm not sure how the determination is made that the cars are on thier left tires. Wouldn't that depend on your perspective, whether you are watching from the front or the back of the cars?

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

thigh ornament - 1. A person whose only value is in her good looks. 2. Trophy girlfriend or boyfriend.

e.g., Sean treats Kelli like she's nothing but a thigh ornament.

submitted by Doug

thighoptic nerve - The nerve connecting the eye to the brain that allows you to see that other people are fat while preventing you from seeing that you yourself are proportionally challenged.

e.g., Mary looks across the aisle at a woman of considerable girth who is holding a size 11 dress. Mary is thinking that the woman is dreaming if she thinks that she will fit into it. Mary is, however, holding up a size 7 dress and looking into the mirror. Mary’s thighoptic nerve prevents her from seeing that she, at 5’2” and 220 lbs, could not possibly ever fit into this dress.

submitted by Borsia Novak

thight - A really tight thigh.

e.g., She has a good pair of thights on her. Check 'em out.

submitted by Naomi Wanliss

thin air toddler - A lurker of a builtin board (or a forum). When you start to lurk you toddle off into thin air.

e.g., I say bye to you all and now I toddle off into thin air. "watch me fly".

submitted by pheloxi

thin-skinned - I think of someone who is thin-skinned as being sensitive to slights, easily hurt emotionally. The Free Dictionary says thin-skinned means "sensitive to criticism or hints; easily upset or affected." There's nothing new in those definitions. But it's also a fact that as we age, the epidermis gets thinner: "With aging, the outer skin layer (epidermis) thins, even though the number of cell layers remains unchanged."   It seems but a small step to give old as another meaning of thin-skinned. It's possible that, as I've aged, I've become more thin-skinned in the emotional sense. It's a certainty that I'm more easily hurt physically -- because my skin no longer provides the protection it once did. My wife's hospice nurse kindly called that to my attention when she commented that my skin looked almost translucent, while hers had a deep tan from frequent tanning salon visits. God only knows what her skin will look like by the time she gets to be my age – if she manages to live that long.    I was unaware until now that we have the same number of epidermal cells as we age, but I'm acutely aware of how much thinner my skin is than it once was. It's much more easily torn than when I was younger. Once I have even the slightest break in my skin, I tend to be a bleeder -- much like a hemophile. I'm sure taking Plavix has something to do with that -- undoubtedly a lot. Plavix helps keep me from having another heart attack, but I think I could easily bleed out if I were injured in a car wreck or other accident.

e.g., When I called him a thin-skinned old geezer, he said I was being redundant, possibly doubly redundant. I suppose that might be the case if being an old man is a proper subset of being a geezer. | I'm not thin-skinned about being referred to as a senior citizen or a seasoned citizen, but my mind is too young for me to like the appellations. That's why I ask about geezer discounts rather than senior discounts. I get blank stares as often as not and have to explain what a geezer is. Then I go on to say I've earned the right to be called a geezer -- and a crank and curmudgeon, too. | With my having mentioned in more than one e-mail in response to her sending me the chloroform joke she sent to me, I'm betting The Girl thinks I'm getting thin-skinned.

submitted by HD Fowler

thing thong - A thong for whatever thing you think needs a thong, or requires it, or deserves it. A thong for your thing, quite fetching at that.

e.g., For modesty and appropriate dress I like to sport a nifty thing thong at the baths. I'm generally the best dressed man around.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

thingalingadingding - A fill-in word that you would use to give you enough time to think of the correct word.

e.g., Where did he set that thingalingadingding?

submitted by Jason Strong

thingamabober - Generic noun.

e.g., That thingamabober has something strange on it.

submitted by Natalie

thingamajig - A term that can be applied to something you've forgotten...also a candy bar in the US, I think...

e.g., Pass me that, um, you know, that thingamajig over there...the grey one.

submitted by Steve - (www)

thingamajiggereedoo - Things unknown

e.g., You know...that thingamajiggereedoo.

submitted by Brittany Jackson

thingamarobert - The proper name of a thingamabob.

e.g., What's this thingamarobert you have, Dave?

submitted by steve zihlavsky

thinger - "Thing," "something," "thingamajig," and "whatchamacallit." Used when referring to some kind of web entity including applications, procedures, etc. Sometimes used to refer to people as a substitute for "whatshisname" or "whatshername."

e.g., I just finished building the spellcheck thinger for the new e-mail publishing system.

submitted by Carl Lindberg

thingie - Same as thingamajig

e.g., Pass me that, um, you know, that thingie over there...the blue one.

submitted by Boris

thingking - King of things.

e.g., Ron Popeil, inventor of the pocket fisherman and dozens of other product is definitely the thingking.

submitted by HD Fowler

thingy - A catchall phrase. A proclamation, exclamation or retort.

e.g., Wow. Thingy! I can't believe he did that. "Wanna go catch a movie?" "Thingy! Let's go!"

submitted by Andrew Clapp