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t'aint - the area in between two spaces

submitted by Gina

t'hell - Contraction of 'to hell.' Said with vigor and clarity of voice to indicate a savage opposition to a question.

e.g., Q: You going to the bar? A: T'hell no! I'm flat broke.

submitted by Nathan Hopper

t'isn't - Arhaic or poetic for "it is not." Somewhat more refined than "t'ain't."

e.g., T'isn't so that simple souls, or not so simple souls, might be "punished forever" for not happening to believe in the "right thing" or for misdeeds or errors made in a lifetime. T'isn't in the nature of Cosmic Compassion to "judge" or "condemn" anything, including humans, people.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

t'mill - A place where the people are revolting or on strike--a reference to the phrase "trouble at t'mill."

e.g., It was a case of t'mill with the workers.

submitted by adrian hobbs

t'pau - Sound made by lump of virtually anything malleable hitting flat water on the perpendicular, usually descriptive of short distances and fairly shallow water in a bowl.

e.g., (T'pau.) Jeez, get that out of the pool.

submitted by Johnny

t-bell - (n., from "Tinkerbell") 1. A "lovely assistant" (of either gender, it seems) in charge of necessary information, materiel, organization, or activity behind the scenes; 2. An unobtrusive scout who investigates a situation prior to main force action; 3. A drug dealer (that is, a purveyor of "fairy dust").

e.g., Abby is the NCIS t-bell. | Elton, you're the t-bell: just walk in, look around, and let us know whether Brewster's in there. If he is, just get your drink and leave. | This school is a drug-free zone: there shouldn't be any t-bells around here.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

t-i-c, tic - Tongue In Cheek.

e.g., It was TIC, for Christ's sake. It was intended to be funny.

submitted by HD Fowler

t-jones - A gansta term for parents.

e.g., I was chillin' when the T-Jones came in.

submitted by Tommy

t-nab - Non-alcoholic "beer" or beer-flavored drink; acronym for "Tasty Non-Alcoholic Beverage." Several of us in recovery enjoy the drinks but don't like to keep using the word "beer" and decided we needed a generic term of our own.

e.g., Hey, Cuzzin Leon, it shore do be blazin' down again today in Texas. I know you cain't have no beer on accounta what that judge sed, but can I offer you a T-Nab?

submitted by Cerise Merritt

t-side - (n.) the east side of the moon (to the right as you look up at it): the part that first shows up after a new moon, waxing from crescent to full, and then gradually disappears, waning away until it disappears entirely into darkness at the waning half moon (22 days into the lunar cycle). [So named for the sea of tranquility, which lies near the lunar equator to the right of the lunar prime meridian.]

e.g., If the t-side is lit at the half-moon, the moon is headed for the full. A t-side half rises a little after noon and reaches its zenith at almost exactly 6:00 pm.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

t-tubi - (n., pronounced tee-TOO-bee, to rhyme with 'me newby'): A Truth that's Told With Bad Intent -- especially (1) out of spite, or to cause embarrassment or harm; or (2) out of context. (From William Blake's Auguries of Innocence: "A truth that's told with bad intent/Beats every lie you could invent.")

e.g., The McCarthy-era witch hunts led many people to spread T-tubis: "so and so was a Communist back in '39." And even though it was true, what difference did it make?

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

t. russell - I came up with this as code to use in a crowded place when I wanted to point out someone who was dressed like a prostitute. The origin is the movie Whore, which starred, you guessed it, Theresa Russell. (Generally, there's some tsk-tsking and head-shaking accompanying any T. Russell comment.) (ED. Of course, just about any T. Russell movie could have served as inspiration.)

e.g., 1. Did you see the T. Russell over by the sunglasses case? 2. What was Chris thinking? Coming out of her house looking like a T. Russell? 3. T. Russell, twelve o' clock. 4. T. Russell alert.

submitted by Brandee A.

t.d. factor - Touch = die factor. An extremely precise measuring system for rating the leftovers in your fridge. Choose a number from 1to 11 to indicate exactly how dangerous it would be for a person to eat your leftovers. The T.D. factor is particularly useful for shared households, where different value systems about food hygiene or sharing may clash.

e.g., Q. What's the T.D factor on this leftover chocolate? A. Three--have it. Q. How about that curry from last week? A. 11.

submitted by philippa

t.o.u. - "(abbrev.)Techy One-Up. Spotting an elementary error of a technical/nerdy nature made by a colleauge who really ought to know about that sort of thing, and the subsequent gloating over one's own cleverness. Multiple TOU's can accumulate in a point scoring system to decide who is the saddest."

submitted by steve - (www)

t3 - In triathlon, there are two transitions, from swimming to biking and biking to running. T3 represents the third transition, from athlete to triathlete or victor.

e.g., I just want to make it to T3.

submitted by Shea - (www)

t4jinghay - (Tee-for-jeen-ge-hay) Ultra-cheap fighting game player that mastered every cheap tactic possible and unable to use all but one character.

e.g., You can never win against a T4Jinghay guy.

submitted by Scott R.

ta - A gender-neutral third person singular pronoun, objective case. To be used when an individual is androgynous, of uncertain or complicated gender, or for hypothetical individuals whose gender is irrelevant. Please see also te, tai, tais, taself.

e.g., When my friend Sabin got back from the "Reimagining Gender for the Post-Postmodern Era" conference, I hugged ta.

submitted by entitything

ta ta - a more posh way to say farewell/goodbye

e.g., "see ya later, ta ta!"

submitted by Zoe - (www)

tabemasho - (v., imperative) "Let's Eat!" (from the Japanese for "Let's Eat!").

e.g., Yo! Everybody!: 1800 hours! Tabemasho!--I got Chinese! Pot Stickers, egg rolls, sesame chicken...come on!

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

table butt - When an overweight person has a a butt that protrudes so much someone could use it as a table.

e.g., Check out that table butt.

submitted by Indrani

table pizza - A pizza for sharing amongst a group, typically ordered as a side dish to main meals,

e.g., Man, we should get a table pizza, too.

submitted by Tim Stevens - (www)

table pizza - A pizza for sharing amongst a group, typically ordered as a side dish to main meals,

e.g., Man, we should get a table pizza, too.

submitted by Tim Stevens - (www)

table pizza - A pizza for sharing amongst a group, typically ordered as a side dish to main meals,

e.g., Man, we should get a table pizza, too.

submitted by Tim Stevens - (www)

table pizza - A pizza for sharing amongst a group, typically ordered as a side dish to main meals,

e.g., Man, we should get a table pizza, too.

submitted by Tim Stevens - (www)

table stable - A cube farm without the cubes, a room full of tables, one for each employee.

e.g., Do your programmers live in a cube farm or a table stable?

submitted by Kevin

tablesist - A person who reads tab's, not sheet music; somone who thinks she can play guitar but can't.

e.g., No wonder he's no good, he's only a tablesist.

submitted by Represent_CA

tabooery - (tab-BOO-er-ee; n.) 1. A discussion about the use and meaning of "bad words," that is, terms ("swears," "cuss words," "dirty words," "obscenities," "vulgarities," "profanities," et quoi d'autre, which are frowned upon in polite society; 2. An informal study of such terms (a step up on the formality scale from a simple discussion); 3. The formal study of bad words (also called Tabology (tab-ALL-uh-jee) or taboo-ology) and other culturally-imposed, sociolinguistic restrictions; 4. The use of bad language in ordinary speech; 5. The use of such bad language as "punctuation" or pointless emphasis (diluted more and more into meaningless rot). [A word my nephew and I came up with as we talked over an analysis he was working up on taboo language; that is, on tabooery.]

e.g., "&*#%$#@~!" "Hey! Can the tabooery!"

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

tabool - Taboos set forth by those in power in order to steer or corral human behaviors.

e.g., The War on Drugs was a tabool implemented in order to clean up the military.

submitted by Betsy Andrews

taccident - A mistake on one's income tax return. Variation: taxxident

e.g., Bob was anxious after the IRS called to inform him that he had made a grave taccident on last year's return.

submitted by Dave Violette

tachologist - 1. One who studies the moustaches; a tachonomer (Obsolete). 2. One who practices tachology; one who professes to foretell events and personality characteristics by the aspects and situation of the moustache follicles.

e.g., Dan Pilkington, the UK's pre-eminent tachologist, commented today...

submitted by Sarah

tachyflumbelus - A skin rash found on the stomach, usually bluish-green.

e.g., The teacher had tachyflumbelus, so she couldn't teach the class.

submitted by Ryan

tachyon speed - Speed faster than the speed of light. Superluminal speed.

e.g., Are you sure Einstein said it was impossible to travel at tachyon speeds?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tackaturblurdy - An indication that something is not as it should be--problematic or even suspicious.

e.g., Actually the whole world seems to be pretty tackaturblurdy at the moment... but as a specific example, my CD player, which I have to hit to do anything, is definitely a bit tackaturblurdy

submitted by will

tacksimum - Maximum tacky.

e.g., "That bright purple Subaru WRX with after market rear spoiler is the tacksimum"

submitted by Steph

tacky 'r us - Where you go to buy very nasty, skanky, or ugly outfits.

e.g., Christina musta got that at Tacky 'R Us. She needs to find out where Britney shops.

submitted by Lex

taco - To spoon with someone who speaks Spanish.

e.g., Want to go to Mills' Lane and taco?

submitted by Juanes

taco hell - The restaurant chain Taco Bell, or what you feel like after partaking of said eatery

e.g., "I went to Taco Hell and got a burrito."

submitted by maccasong

taco hell - It's the devil's favorite eating place. The food is hot, hotter than hell.

e.g., Your lips will blister, your tongue will swell, you'll cry for happy, at Taco Hell.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

taco tit - The phenomenon that occurs when the contents of a woman's meal falls onto her chest.

e.g., You can really tell when Joyce has been trying to eat with chopsticks because she always ends up with a major case of taco tit afterwards. She ought to stick to using forks.

submitted by Heather

tactilize - To imagine what something would feel like to the touch; analogous to "visualize," only with touch.

e.g., In order to help her students understand how Braille works, the teacher asked them to close their eyes and tactilize their fingers running over raised dots on a sheet of paper.

submitted by Peter Zakrzewski

tactopunk - A jerk who purposely speaks in a manner verbally abusive to all.

e.g., Got this roll of duct tape for that tactopunk, Chris.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

tad - A bit, or a small amount.

e.g., I'm feeling a tad tired today; I think I had a tad too much to drink last night

submitted by Ste McC - (www)

taddie - Small, a tad.

e.g., I'd like a taddie bit more, please.

submitted by Haley

tadeusz - A mentally handicapped person with an extremely low intelligence quotient.

e.g., That gerbil ramming into the brick wall is tadeusz.

submitted by Aaron and Jason

tadge - A unit of measure somewhere between a tad and a smidge.

e.g., That's a tadge too difficult.

submitted by Boolbar

tadpole - A man who is dating a woman considerably older then himself.

e.g., Look at Betty, she's landed herself a tadpole.

submitted by Joe Pirelli - (www)

taekwondonut - Self defence martial art using cream buns and the like.

e.g., Gustaf was easily able to defeat his would-be attacker by deploying his Taekwondonut skills, vigorously rubbing a Boston Cream into the foolhardy miscreant's balaclava.

submitted by John Waid

tafe-syndrome - Those at a publicly funded tertiary education facility, deluded into thinking that they will be set up when they finish. The saying comes from Enmore Tafe in Sydney where many design students think that upon graduation they will just walk into web design jobs. 2. A person whose expectations are far in excess of the reality of her situation. NB.: Not used as an insult, more in the way of pity for the unwitting.

e.g., The way those guys are talking -- its tafe-syndrome for sure.

submitted by mike - (www)

taffer - A common thief.

e.g., That taffer stole my wallet.

submitted by Curtis - (www)

taffey - Aussie slang. The educational underclass.

e.g., Employee: Did you see that? He didn't even spell his name correctly on his Ausstudy Form. Manager: Must be a taffey.

submitted by lat3ralis

taft - Puffy and soft. Possibly warm and huggable, but not necessarily.

e.g., I rubbed my cat's belly, and it was very taft.

submitted by Ben Peters - (www)

tag 'n release - Picking up a potential love interest and setting her free before having sex. Usually practiced by married men who don't want to cheat on their wives, but still enjoy the thrill of the chase.

e.g., I went to a nightclub last night for a game of tag 'n release.

submitted by Mark

tagackny - This is the greatest of all hates. An outstanding detesting of whatever this word is used with.

e.g., The whining that came gave me the bitter tagackny overtone toward the woman, one that I had hoped to feel never again.

submitted by piggarro99 - (www)

taggle - "to tackle or wrestle in a gentle, playful way, from Stephen King's "Bag of Bones" "

e.g., Be nice or I'll come over to tickle and taggle you.

submitted by Alf

taglish - Tagalog-English, a combination of two very different languages typical of the Tagalog dialect. Prevalent in the US, Canada, Australia, Philippines, and UK.

e.g., Rom was speaking Taglish, so they couldn't tell what he meant.

submitted by Rom Zamora - (www)

tagonize/tagonist - Meanings unknown (probably having to do with worrying about really-bad Avery labels) but usage quite clear.

e.g., Someone in favor of tagonizing is a protagonist.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tahbazian - An old Persian name, derived from the princely title and meaning great defender or soldier. {ED. An Armenian surname?}

e.g., The wise tahbazian pardoned the defendants.

submitted by Jonathan Pike

tahn - Community in Essex, larger than a village but not as big as a city.

e.g., Shane: Are you goin' up Tahn later?

submitted by Bryan

tai - Gender-neutral third person singular pronoun of possession. To be used referring to possessions of individuals who are androgynous, of uncertain or complicated gender, or hypothetical individuals whose gender is irrelevant. Please see also te, ta, tais, taself.

e.g., If your average conservative business person had gone to the "Reimagining Gender for the Post-Postmodern Era", it would have blown tai mind.

submitted by entitything

tail-pipe - To sit on a protruding object, whether accidental or not, and typically cause yourself pain.

e.g., Annie tail-piped herself on the seatbelt.

submitted by jason

tailor - Tailor-made. A pre-rolled, factory-made cigarette as opposed to(and presumably better than) one which is self-made and hand-rolled.

e.g., Hey, can I bum a tailor? These rollies are killing me.

submitted by Rastamon

taint or perineum - The area of the body between the anus and the testicles or vagina. No other words will be accepted for this body part. Read the guidelines: RTG. British equivalent: tizzent. Note: The word perineum has nothing to do with the Latin word perorationem -- although both words have to do with ends.

e.g., The area of the body between the anus and the balls is called the perineum -- or the taint, because it t'aint either. | Taint misbehavin'? Acting up? Seek psychiatric help immediately.

submitted by beelzebub - (www)

tais - Gender-neutral third person singular adjective of possession. To be used to refer to things belonging to an individual whose gender is androgyne, uncertain, or complicated, or to a hypothetical person whose gender is irrelevant. Please see also te, ta, tai, taself.

e.g., Sabin wants the Gender Workbook back; it's tais.

submitted by entitything

tajmahtoilet - a very expensive bathroom remodeling project.

e.g., The contractor's clients purchased $90 per square foot imported tile for their tajmahtiolet renovation.

submitted by Maggie Dawson - (www)

tajunga - Ta-HUN-ga. An exceptionally well-built woman who tends to wear a lot of makeup, expensive clothes, manicure, and hairdo. Coined by a former resident of Tajunga, California, who claimed all women of that town looked and dressed the part.

e.g., After his divorce from a plain-Jane, Joe only dated tajungas.

submitted by Ted Weeks

taka - Takashimaya, a popular Japanese department store.

e.g., Let's go to taka today.

submitted by Rachelle

takagistic - Used by Formula One fans to describe someone who often skids off track. Word commemorates former Formula One driver Tora Takagi.

e.g., Michael knew he was having a Takagistic weekend when he spun off the road for the second time in \ two laps.

submitted by Wycco

take it to the holiday! - Forget about it, man!

e.g., Ryan (a little on the depressed side): Josh and I broke my little action figure last night. We were trying to interchange his hand, and his arm busted off. I was sad. Nicky: Awww, I'm sorry. You can always buy another one. Take it to the holiday!

submitted by Nicky Ubben

take me up - Judge talk. "If you don't like my ruling, you can appeal." Is there an appeal process for rejected submittals? Not in this life.

e.g., I've ruled on the law and that's it. If you don't like it, take me up.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

take out - Much in the news since Teamsters President Jimmy Hoffa used the verb phrase to introduce the President of the United States in a Labor Day speech. Democrats may claim Hoffa was referring to taking Tea Partiers out on a date, while Republicans are likely to claim Hoffa had violence in mind, and that he meant something along the lines of destroy or kill.    There's a good discussion of the meaning of "take out" at, Language Discussion Forums Word Origins and Meanings: take out (kill, destroy, …):    Toby Harnden, the Daily Telegraph's US Editor, blogs about the continuing vitriolic rhetoric in US politics with "Will Barack Obama condemn Joe Biden and Jimmy Hoffa for calling Republicans 'barbarians' and 'son of a bitches'." Given that we've had a revolution and a civil war on this side of the pond, I'm sure there have been times in our political history when the words have been more heated than they are now. Nevertheless, they're the worst I've seen in my short life.

e.g., "President Obama, this is your army. We are ready to march. Let's take these sons of bitches out and give America back to an America where we belong," Hoffa added.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

take stock in - Respect, whose opinion I respect, whose judgment I respect, trust. . . .

e.g., "Every politician I take stock in. . . ." "Hold on. Sorry to interrupt. But . . . politicians you take stock in? Surely you jest. You gotta be kidding. There's not a politician alive you can trust." "Well, I would have been speaking in relative terms, of course. If you had let me finish."

submitted by HD Fowler

take the grenade - To hit on the ugly girl in a group so your friends can get with her attractive friends. (Comes from jumping on the grenade so it doesn't blow up your pals.)

e.g., Cecil: They're all fine -- except that one. Bob: Don't worry bro, I'll take the grenade.

submitted by jeff

take the mickey - Michael Quinion Q From Lisa Russell-Pinson: While I was an exchange student in England, I heard the phrase to take the Mickey, meaning to tease. Do you know where this expression comes from? Does it have something to do with disdain for the Irish? Is it a euphemism for to take the piss? A It is, yes. It dates from at least the 1930s in various forms; the oldest version recorded in print, from 1935, is to take the mike out of, as in this from a book with the title Cockney Cavalcade: He wouldnt let Pancake take the mike out of him. Its said to have its origin in the rhyming slang to take the mickey bliss, that means to take the piss. Mickey as a diminutive form of Michael has been common for many years, but how it got together with bliss is unknown, so weve no idea whether it is a reference to an Irish Mick. As the form first recorded is already elliptical, either the rhyming slang is actually older than the 1930s or some other source has to be looked for. In the 1950s a mock-genteel version to extract the Michael became briefly fashionable.

e.g., What's really pathetic? Commenters who hide behind anonymity.

submitted by [Kathy Shaidle] - (www)

takebacks - What happens when you break up with someone and then you get back together again, usually multiple times. Not complimentary.

e.g., I don't do takebacks -- they always end badly.

submitted by Rainbow Woman

takeshi - To fall in a humiliating manner. Possibly from Japanese actor and model Takeshi Kaneshiro.

e.g., Walter takeshied from the back of a giant frog.

submitted by mdb - (www)

taking it in one - To be a real team player, or to give it all you've got. Term originated in the old days of Vaudeville, when the stage was divided into zones, Zone One being the closest to the footlights, and the audience as well.

e.g., Stanley: Christine's really taking it in one on this new project. I say we nominate her as spokeperson for us all! Group: Hear, hear!

submitted by Paul

taking the piss - Pulling someone's leg, putting them on. British origins. Also, ripping the piss, a superlative.

e.g., When Bob told me that the WTC towers were hit by hijacked terrorist airplanes, I thought he was taking the piss.

submitted by Dan

talanoa - The dialect you believe yourself to speak, such that when you are placed in what you consider a formal situation you almost automatically begin to approximate the speech pattern. | By extension, the social group with which your beliefs resonate -- e.g., liberal, African-American, entrepreneur, hacker, etc. From the Hindi "idle chit-chat for the sake of social coherence."

e.g., Usually you can't hear from Meg's accent that she's an Australian, but when someone mistakes her for an American, her talanoa yanks on her so hard she sounds like Steve Irwin. | "Hendrix, Creedence, Arlo Guthrie? What kind of a collection is this?" "Be kind to my talanoa, man, I'm a baby boomer -- Woodstock was, like, the symbol of our generation."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

talearect - /TAL-e-a-rect; the first syllable rhymes with the man's name Hal/ To correct (criticize) excessively or abusively. [From Latin talea: rod or stake, + rectum.]

e.g., That jerk still talearects people even though his wife left him, his son ran away from home, and he can't figure out why his subordinates hate him.

submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon

talent - Describing a place or situation in which there are many good looking women.

e.g., "Boy, there sure is some talent here tonight."

submitted by Rob Reienrt

talkabout - The point in a conversation where the person talking ignores the proper protocol of fair exchange and goes on a seemingly endless verbal journey. From the aboriginal word for journey, "walkabout." (Some of these people end up in politics and some on talk shows. They also tend to overtalk.)

e.g., I knew I was doomed to be late when, speaking about her grandchildren, she went on a talkabout.

submitted by Carlos I. Medina

talkin' out my mouth again - Talking without thinking what you are saying, saying something stupid, putting foot in mouth.

e.g., There I go, talking out my mouth again.

submitted by April

talkin-it-up-a-bit - A story that is a little too hard to believe.

e.g., Mark: I met this hot and beautiful chick and she immediately fell for me. Dee: I think you're talkin-it-up-a-bit, Markie.

submitted by Dee

talking head - "A talker on television who talks directly into the cameras and whose upper body [and head are] all that is shown on the screen." The term is rarely (if ever) used as a compliment. Don Quixote and The Talking Head.

e.g., I've reached the point where talking heads more often than not make me want to scream blue murder.

submitted by HD Fowler

talking out my ass - not really knowing about what you're talking about, but talking about it anyway and trying to sound as if you know exactly what you're saying.

e.g., when i got to talking about being knowledgeable about the rooms and compartments in the titanic, i was just talking out my ass to impress that girl.

submitted by Paul Jarvis - (www)

talking woman - In burlesque, a chorus girl or stripper who could also be counted on to deliver lines.

e.g., Mom was a talking woman back in the day.

submitted by HD Fowler

talkintuitive - A descriptor of someone comfortable with or adept at conversation, someone "easy to talk to."

e.g., After we got to know each other over a couple of drinks, she was talkintuitive, so I thought I'd ask her back to my place.

submitted by Andy Eddy

talkitate - Speaking using bad grammar.

e.g., I have a tendency to talkitate.

submitted by Ian Morrison

talknical - Topics of discourse or conversation involving words and meanings that relate only to specific, often obscure, technical areas. This format is used both to enhance an aura of exclusivity and superiority for those conversant in the field as well as to reinforce a hopeless feeling of inadequacy for those unintelligent enough to be unfamiliar with the subject.

e.g., Modern law allows only three defenses against a charge of murder: insanity, self-defense, and being forced to endure three hours of a talknical discussion.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

talko - A "typo" is an error when typing; therefore, an error in voice recognition software should be called a "talko"...a nd for added amusement it resembles the word "taco." Maybe in the future the emoji of an actual 🌮 will be used in place of the word.

e.g., I could hardly understand what she was saying in her text because it had so many tacos.

submitted by Brian Kruschwitz - (www)

talkument - Verbal agreement most likely misunderstood by all parties, usually sealed with a "wink-wink-nudge-nudge" -- i.e., not what was said, but rather what was meant.

e.g., The talkument needed more clairifcation before we could agree to disagree.

submitted by Peter Beckwith

talkumentashown - Taking your point to an extreme such that you show approximately what you meant.

e.g., Without the talkumentashown no one could figure out how to do it.

submitted by Peter Beckwith

tall erance - The elevated moral act of accepting all individuals for what they are, and not for what we'd like them to be.

e.g., I can never reach the heights of tall erance, especially when it comes to swaggering gang members, body piercings and permanent tattoos, and politicians.

submitted by charlie lesko

tallboys - Sixteen ounce cans of beer. Same diameter as a twelve, but much taller.

e.g., They don't sell tallboys at American hockey stadiums anymore as too many people were chucking them onto the ice.

submitted by Stephen Mize

tallywags - "18th century term for a pair of male testicles."

e.g., "The Politically-Correct Parents of Politically-Correct America (PCPOPCA) recently penned a letter to Ben & Jerry's suggesting that they refrain from using 'Schweddy Balls' on the outside of their ice-cream carton and instead replace it with the tot-friendly title 'Tallywags Treats.'

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tallywags - "[An]18th century term for a pair of male testicles"

e.g., "The Politically-Correct Parents of Politically-Correct America (PCPOPCA) recently penned a letter to Ben & Jerry's suggesting that they refrain from using 'Schweddy Balls' on the outside of their ice cream carton and instead replace it with the tot-friendly title 'Tallywags Treats.'"

submitted by [Quipping Queen] - (www)

talps - A synonym and reversal of "splat" -- it just sounds much better than the original.

e.g., The pumpkin went talps when it hit the deck.

submitted by Greg Vickers

tammy-fayed - Painted with gratuitous amounts of make-up.

e.g., She was so Tammy-Fayed she looked like a common street walker.

submitted by Stephen Mize

tamperage - Something that has been damaged through criminal mischief.

e.g., "Actually Used" When I received the package, I noted no damage (or tamperage) to the case or unit that would indicate the detector was DOA.

submitted by Albert D. Pereira

tan tric - Dividing the word, "Tantric" ("pertaining to the practice of using sexual pleasure to achieve a spiritual goal") into two words implies the act of free and guiltless sex performed while in warm, sunny, and exotic places. Antonym: pale ontology.

e.g., Rod's passionate career goal was to be the exclusive Tan tric Master on the white Carribean sands of the all-inclusive spa, Hedonism II.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

tanatophilia - Obsession with death.

e.g., Tanatophilics prefer hunting with spears... or rocks.

submitted by Fabrizio

tanch - Based on a Philippine word "Tanchahin" meaning doing something that involves precise amounts, measurements, and knowledge. But, since the person doing the act is not equipped with proper tools or not skilled, the person just relies on gut feel, very rough estimates, or any other things that cannot be classified as a proper measurment basis.

e.g., I want to bake an apple pie but I can't find my measuring cups. I'll just have to tanch it.

submitted by Patrick Lumbres

tang-patroller - Bar hopper whose sole purpose for living is going to bars to pick up girls. (Ed. I'd have said it more straightforwardly: A guy patrolling for poontang.)

e.g., Look at Chris eyeballing the blonde on the dance floor. He's a tang-patroller extraordinaire.

submitted by kevin

tanga - "A moderate to minimal coverage European panty silhouette that has a back panel that is wider than a thong but narrower than a bikini. Tangas are a comfortable way to transition from a bikini to a thong."

e.g., Look, you're not always going to see a really thin whale tail when a chick wearing lowriders bends over. That's because not all of them are going to be wearing thongs instead of bloomers or drawers. Some won't be wearing undergarments at all and others are going to be wearing tangas or bikinis.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tangcentri - Touch the center.

e.g., Please tangcentri of the circle.

submitted by dodgeviper - (www)

tangenital - One consequence of nude sunbathing.

e.g., While visitng nude beaches in Southern France, you are permitted to stand tangenital but are not allowed to touch.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

tangent - "A narrative drift connection, sometimes tenuously, to the original topic."

e.g., ""How'd we start talking about motorcycles? Oh, well, tangent. Anyway...""

submitted by Jess

tangentical - Multiple tangents of thought that interconnect with each other.

e.g., CS: Tangentical thoughts often explore different ideas where those different ideas can be confused with other ideas and get jumbled up and confused into something of a tangle of confused thought. HD: CopperStone, seems to me that sentence is written in a bit of a tangentical way.

submitted by CopperStone - (www)

tango - (v) to sneak up behind someone and simultaneously slap both their ears. Derived from commercials for a soda in Europe back in the day.

e.g., Joe tangoed Mike, but only because Mike had poured soy sauce in Joe's milk.

submitted by Brian

tango uniform - Tits Up. Used to describe something dead, useless, or otherwise defunct; very wrong.

e.g., The CEO got all upset because his wife opened an attachment on his laptop, and now its bigtime Tango Uniform.

submitted by ZenRhino

tanisow - There Are No Incorrect Spellings Of Words. The power to give the intended meaning to a word which previously had no meaning. This power effectively transforms every misspelled word into a correctly spelled word.

e.g., Red: Through tanisow, "freat" became a "real word" in the PseudoDictonary. Ted: Huh?

submitted by Joseph Guidry

tanj - There Ain't No Justice. Used as an epithet. Created by Larry Niven.

e.g., We're out of gas? TANJ!

submitted by garth - (www)

tank - A very large, very heavy car or truck, especially one that looks like it can withstand a lot of damage.

e.g., Norman's new car is a freaking tank! You could almost stand up in that thing!

submitted by Juice Maloose

tank - Built like a tank: buff, strong, huge, big, tough.

e.g., When he took off his shirt and people realized he was a tank, they left him alone.

submitted by Kendal - (www)

tanked - Doing very poorly.

e.g., Madonna's new movie tanked at the box office. | "How did you do on the test?" "I just tanked."

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

tankruptcy - The state of having run out of fuel: e.g., gasoline in a car, heating oil in a home.

e.g., It's one thing to play tankruptcy as a nookie gambit, quite another to do it alone at three am and have to call your dad to pick you up.

submitted by adam thorsell

tanksgiffing - Dot's ven a Germman fren iss giffing U a neiss nu Piktcha uff a Tank -- Tank U, kidt.

e.g., Az a oldt und begrizzled Soldja uff der Tank Korp--Ei am reelie a prischy ating der Tanksgiffing on der In Der Nett.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tanktopic - Used to describe a summer clothing topic of conversation.

e.g., Amy: Hey, Nicky, since you're the best dressed cachique in the whole school, what are you wearing to the beach ball? Nicky: Why, Amy, such a fine tanktopic. I am wearing ________. (Whatever the bessed dressed cachique in your school would wear. Fill in the blank.)

submitted by Nicky Ubben

tanky - Irritable with a bratty, quasi-violent edge.

e.g., Little Phranky kicked Marty in the eye. Little Phranky made Marty *very* tanky.

submitted by Stephanie

tanorexia - Obsessive overuse of tanning salons to achieve an enviable skin tone, sometimes resulting in skin damage. LA Times 4/27/04)

e.g., My sister and I have naturally very fair skin, but lately she's been haunting tanning salons to try to change that. Mom is very concerned about her tanorexia.

submitted by natalie

tanorexic - Someone who goes to the tanning bed way too much.

e.g., She goes tanning every day. She's tanorexic.

submitted by Kate

tanph - There are no plot holes. Used when someone points out an obvious hole in your story and you don't want to admit it.

e.g., IcefaerieLives: I didn't make the tags, did I? Eurous Ventulus: >_> Tanph.

submitted by PPM

tanstaafl - "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch." Old saying, but Tanstaafl as a word was popularized by the book The Moon is a Harsh Mistress by Robert A. Heinlein.

e.g., A. Hey, let's go into that bar -- they give away free drinks. B. Tanstaafl, my friend. . . . What? The food pays for the drinks. If the drinks weren't free, the food would cost half as much. No matter what, someone, somewhere pays.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

tantalizational factor - (n) Scale used to measure tantalizing things.

e.g., Oh, her tantalizational factor is about seven.

submitted by malachi

tanti - Wonderul, cool, excellent, good. Alternatively rubbish, pathetic, bad. Generally used as the thing compared to in a simile with its goodness or badness determined by the adjective in the simile.

e.g., As cool as tanti. What a pile of tanti.

submitted by Some guy from the street

tanwahsya - "(Tan-wahs-ya) Acronym. Stands for "There Are No Words For How Screwed You Are" Used when someone has put off a terribly large project to the last minute, or any other appropriate time."

e.g., "Peter, you are tanwahsya."

submitted by ryan

tao-mark - The supermarket where you "Get a Little Less. . . ."

e.g., Tao-mark, the supermarket where you "Get a Little Less...," and its unique trademark are featured at

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tao-te-ching - The sound of money being collected at Tao-mark (q.v.), where you get less but pay more.

e.g., The tao-te-ching, tao-te-ching of coins (especially silver dollars) is music to the ears of the Tao-mark manager.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tap - To make a quick, limited excursion against a military enemy, in order to find out as much as possible about his strength, disposition of forces, etc. During the Civil War, General Nathan Bedford Forrest, commanding cavalry, was considered a master of the tap.

e.g., General, our tap has shown us exactly what we need to know in order to defeat Col. Dummkopf tomorrow.

submitted by Wayne Hagood

tapastry - An adhesive strip used to rejoin two or more pieces of broken pastry together.

e.g., Gary ate about a third of Jill's eclair while she was in the bathroom, but he used a piece of tapastry to make it look like he never touched it.

submitted by Saint714

tape-case memory - The ability to remember silly unimportant things from a long time ago (like the color of a cassette tape case), but not important recent things (like yesterday's math lesson).

e.g., Frank remembered what shirt I wore for his sister's 7th Birthday, but he couldn't remember what color my dress was for our wedding a year ago. He has such a tape-case memory.

submitted by Webster's Nemesis

tapeloate - The act of turning on a bath tab with one's foot from the other end of the bath. Related word: tapeloatinor -- a person with the ability to tapeloate.

e.g., A tapeloatinor has tapeloated that tap.

submitted by Mark Wade

tapezzate (or tappezzate) - To fill a space with something Etimology: Latin verb tapitiare, which modernly became tappezzare in contemporaneous Italic.

e.g., I tappezzated my room with ... posters. | I tappezzated the city with fliers.

submitted by Snowberry - (www)

taping - Dragging a large peice of duct tape across the road such that an unsuspecting car will drive over it causing the tape to slap against the side of the car and sound like a flat tire.

e.g., Last night when I went taping, the cops almost caught me.

submitted by Absolute Zero

tappable - If someone is "tappable," you would have sex with her.

e.g., He's tappable, but not boyfriend material.

submitted by Rachel

tapped - Someone who is nuts. Also, tapped in the head. Similar to the old saying "touched" to describe insane behavior

e.g., I can't believe Carlos just went ahead and shaved off all his body hair--he's tapped in the head. or: He's tapped.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

taps - Thick As Pig Sh*t

e.g., Chris doesn't have a clue, he's TAPS.

submitted by David Tidy

tar - Target, when you are too lazy to say the word in full.

e.g., Hey, Im going to Tar. You wanna go?

submitted by Jess

tar baby - A person who behaves exactly like you do, a kindred spirit. Someone you know you can love forever and ever. A person who makes life seem like it's so easy.

e.g., Ryan is so much like me, he's my tar baby.

submitted by Taylor - (www)

tar beach - The rooftops of tenement houses and highrises where city dwellers go to sunbathe. Term probably originated in New York City, but can be applied in virtually any city which has tall buildings.

e.g., Ned: Where'd you get that tan? Didja go to the shore? Jed: No. (points skyward to indicate rooftop) Tar Beach, baby, tar beach.

submitted by Paul

tarania - A beautiful sunlit horizon.

e.g., I caught my breath, taken in by the beautiful tarania in front of me

submitted by Francesca

tarantino - To propose a deal so juicy and enticing that the other party would be a fool to reject it. Refers to the movie The Four Rooms.

e.g., Paul: So I was offered a new coat and $1000. Rich: That deal is freakin' Tarantino -- depending on what you had to do for it, of course.

submitted by natmac

tarantino - 1. To do the thing that would logically come last first. 2. To execute tasks in a completely random order. Refers to the general plot structure of Quentin Tarantino's movie, Pulp Fiction.

e.g., I had to read a whole book for Amercan Lit. It turns out it's a bad idea to tarantino it and read the last chapter first.

submitted by Andrew Troupis

tard - What they did to con artists in old New England.

e.g., He was tard an' feathurd and run out of town on a rail.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tardcore - Something so extreme that it has become ridiculous.

e.g., My brother paints his face green before going to the game. He's a tardcore fan.

submitted by John Chase

tardis - Bigger on the inside than on the outside. [ED. From Dr. Who?]

e.g., The bag was a Tardis.

submitted by Ellie Holdich

tardissy - Unbelievably spacious or "roomy" inside. Alternate version: tardiscious. (Inspired by the TV show Doctor Who in which Doc Who's time machine, called a tardis, is bigger inside than its external dimensions should allow.)

e.g., Cameron, how did you manage to bring ten DVDs for movie night? How tardissy is that backpack of yours?

submitted by Jay Hinkelman

tarfu - Things Are Really Fucked Up, used in the US military.

e.g., "This is whiskey. Foxtrot, do you copy?" "Whiskey, this is foxtrot. TARFU. Need extraction NOW."

submitted by Die Hard Jon MClain - (www)

targe - A play on the name for the retail chain store Target. Pronounced Tar-JAY.

e.g., I'm going to Targe to get some socks--wanna come with?

submitted by Ashe

targeted individual - Victim of organized, clandestine,experimentation and bullying, with the goal of destroying the victim's life; usually committed on behalf of person's of wealth or authority.

e.g., The targeted individual is often stalked by police.

submitted by Carol

targhetto - Target chain stores--reserved for aging, rundown, old-school variants.

e.g., Joe's making a late-night run to the Targhetto for a box o' Brillo pads and some dental floss.

submitted by Christiane

targsuming - The morsels of food ( specifically meat) which get stuck in between your teeth and irritate the bejesus out of you. (Usually results in picking of teeth.)

e.g., After eating that corn on the cob and chicken for dinner I've got killer targsuming.

submitted by Kricky aka Hootie McBoob

targull - A seagull that lives off of scraps dropped in store or mall parking lot, usually not living near any major water source.

e.g., When I walk home I often am calmed by the clucks of the targulls. Although many find them a traffic problem when they sit in the road.

submitted by Ian Faynik

tarhand - A tarhand is a close friend or family member who after watching you struggle to unload groceries or move furniture or do the dishes or another chore, benignly asks if she can help. This is done at the precise or almost precise moment the task is done.

e.g., Judy labored to carry the dresser upstairs while Dave read the newspaper. Just as she sat it down with an audible grunt, Dave called out "Can I help ya, hon?" in true tarhand fashion.

submitted by Susanne Strickland - (www)

tarhead - Individual engaged in petroleum based recreation

e.g., The tarhead laughed as the wheels of his ATV crushed yet another prairie dog out of existence.

submitted by kevin

tarick - The spaces between the boards on a bridge.

e.g., Be careful not to fall between the taricks.

submitted by Courtney 7th English

tarpaulin' - Contracted verb having to do with liberally applying a very-heavy petroleum product to our Conceptualizer.

e.g., Tarpaulin' isn't nice (or warranted) since the PD is an excellent concept, although it does give a great excuse for then whaling the tar out of him.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tars - Tires.

e.g., Check out the new tars on his Camaro.

submitted by taylorpup

tarsh - Alternate pronunciation for Target.

e.g., Lets go and shop in Tarsh.

submitted by Beaver

tart - N. Loose woman, slut. V. To get ready to go out in the evening, especially to put on makeup.

e.g., Look at the uber-short skirt on that tart Chris. Give me five minutes to tart up and I'll be ready.

submitted by Magda Wojtyra - (www)

tart box - Small, cheap car that has been modified -- usually with scoops, vents, wings and alloy wheels -- to look faster than it actually is. Another ploy is to stick a massive exhaust on the car, ruining backpressure and performance, but making a suitably quasi-macho noise.

e.g., Darren had boyed up his tart box by putting neon lights on the underside. Consequently, everyone thought of him as a mental pygmy.

submitted by Bent Udder - (www)

tas - Tea. Possibly from the French "'Tas de the." Also see flug.

e.g., Go on love, make us a tas.

submitted by David Parker

taself - Third person singular gender neutral pronoun of self-reflection. Used to refer to individuals whose gender is androgyne, uncertain, or complicated, or hypothetical individuals whose gender is irrelevant. Please see also te, ta, tai, tais.

e.g., At the "Reimagining Gender for the Post-Postmodern Era" convention, my eye was caught by a gorgeous person who had covered taself in shiny foil.

submitted by entitything

tass - "True" or "Truth." A corruption of the Latin "Veritas" (very tass). Used as a synonym for "cool."

e.g., That shirt is tass.

submitted by Alexander King - (www)

tastamalasty - (TAY-stuh-muh-LAY-stee) To be extremely tasty

e.g., Mmmm this chao-tsu is tastamalasty!

submitted by Leandra - (www)

tastie - Quite odd, perplexing.

e.g., That's a tastie gold leotard your wearing. I got myself into a tastie situation last night when I locked myself in the broom cupboard. "That's a tasty burger." (Pulp Fiction)

submitted by charley - (www)

tastolfaceous - Having a taste that resembles the smell of another, often followed by "to" or "with." [coined in 2006 by Shawn Remy (b. 1979); tast(e) + olf(actory) + -aceous]

e.g., This pumpkin pie is tastolfaceous to a candle store.

submitted by Shawn Michael Remy

tastualize - To imagine how something would taste. Similar to "visualize."

e.g., That's looks like an interesting dish. I'm trying to tastualize it.

submitted by Daniel McLemore & Melissa Carr - (www)

tatas sauce - Originally a pleasant soothing creme for the udder of the cow, smells good, feels good, is good. Also benefits the hands which milk the cow, soft and lovely. Now available also for human female of the species, equally effective and beneficial to all.

e.g., At first we were skeptical, as befits the intelligent yet critical mind, but then were pleased to discover that well named tatas sauce did indeed soothe and smooth and often quite soften the appropriate tissues to the delight of the whole family, indeed.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

tatatuma - A land that Princess Banana Neiner and Princess Cantaloupe Feiner control.

e.g., Princess Cantaloupe Feiner entered the grand castle of Tatatuma.

submitted by erin Doody

tate - A sticky substance meant to keep doors and windows sealed.

e.g., Trouble with drafts? Seal your windows with tate.

submitted by jenova

tater-tot - A person who is slightly overweight or pudgy.

e.g., Mrs. West referred to the chunky little boy as a tater-tot.

submitted by Lauren

tater-tot-olicious - Amazing beyond sexy and sensuous in every sense but the bedroom sense.

e.g., You look tater-tot-olicious.

submitted by Cass

tation - One of the most widely-used and least-well-defined root words in the English language.

e.g., Consider just a few of the many words for which "tation" is the root: Station, Imitation, Limitation, Excitation, Rotation, Roundaboutation, Invitation, Connotation, Transportation, Teleportation, and Presentation, just to name a few. There were 583 word(s) matching the search term "tation" in the PD at the time of this submittal!

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tatoo - To say goodbye as an afterthought.

e.g., Ta, too. See you later, alligator.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

tatoon - Texan/Czech for "tattoo."

e.g., I can't believe my granddaughter wants a tatoon.

submitted by John Booth, Jr.

tatsahfoo - The sofa or couch--derived from the word "chesterfield."

e.g., Rogi, stop jumping on the tatsahfoo.

submitted by Renee

tattle wave - A phenomenon seen mainly in elementary schools in which one child reports the improper activities of another child to an adult, setting off a chain of reports and complaints from other students. In adults, a similar incident often occurs regarding malicious gossip.

e.g., When Jimmy told the teacher that Bobby had pushed him off the seesaw, he started a tattle wave that engulfed the first grade classroom.

submitted by Jennifer V. & Scott G.

tattoes - Tattoos on one's toes, from a misspelling.

e.g., Frankly, I prefer tattoes to arse antlers.

submitted by Miss Speller

tattooware - Software that cannot be removed, or can be removed only with great difficulty

e.g., This tattooware took several hours to remove, and I ended up losing other programs along with it.

submitted by Kevin Fuchs - (www)

tattyphernalia - The untidy but necessary paraphernalia of modern life.

e.g., I like having a laptop computer, but all the tattyphernalia it comes with is a bit annoying.

submitted by Alien Burrito

tatyr - A lecherous Mr. Potato Head.

e.g., Chris is a satyr wannabe, but he's only a tatyr.

submitted by HD Fowler

taunt the happy fun ball - To engage in a dangerous activity despite having been warned not to do so. From the Saturday Night Live skit "Happy Fun Ball," about a seemingly innocuous product with more disclaimers and warnings than weapons-grade plutonium.

e.g., Ned: Come on, I'll drive. Red: I've heard about how you drive, and I'm not about to taunt the happy fun ball.

submitted by Shaduan

tauntology - The study of provocative, insulting questions and remarks.

e.g., We asked Dennis, a testy guy at the Gym, "When you get to the boustrophedon, what do you do?" He did not know to "make a U turn." Boustrophedon: turning like oxen at the end of a plowing row.

submitted by Frank Mandriota

taupeville - A neighborhood that requires buildings to be all neutral colors, usually beige and taupe. Generic, non-descript, lacking in personality and boring.

e.g., We're much too eclectic to live in Taupeville.

submitted by Elaine

taurocoproglossification - From Latin: Taurus--bull, copro--faeces. From Greek: gloss--speaking. Talking bullspiel. But using an impressively long word.

e.g., What you say is taurocoproglossification.

submitted by martibabes

taw - Shooting taw, the marble used for shooting. Typically the shooter's favorite marble. More marbles terms.

e.g., No, what I said was "shooting taw." It has nothing to do with "shooting stars" or "puddy tats." My taw was a beautiful swirl of rainbow colors on a white background. It was the closest thing to a perfect sphere I ever held in my hand. No, we didn't "play for keeps." That was considered gambling, and gambling was considered wrong. Not up there with killing a robin with my B-B gun, but close.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tawt - Tweety Bird's pronunciation of "thought."

e.g., I tawt I saw a puddy tat.

submitted by The Weirdo

taxfarms - Industrial wind energy installations are the benefactor of huge subsidies, thus they are built on farms receiving their preponderance of profit from federal and state taxes.

e.g., Taxfarms are an affront to common sense and the first law of economics.

submitted by Mike Winkler - (www)

taxibout-rounder - A car driver who doesn't understand the rules of roundabouts. Usually to be found driving a taxi for some reason.

e.g., Hello?!? You're supposed to give way you taxibout-rounder.

submitted by Richard J

taxicab numbers - "The number 1729 is known as the Hardy Ramanujan number after a famous visit by Hardy to see Ramanujan at a hospital. In Hardy's words: 'I remember once going to see him when he was ill at Putney. I had ridden in taxi cab number 1729 and remarked that the number seemed to me rather a dull one, and that I hoped it was not an unfavorable omen. 'No,' he replied, 'it is a very interesting number; it is the smallest number expressible as the sum of two cubes in two different ways.' | "Immediately before this anecdote, Hardy quoted Littlewood as saying, 'Every positive integer was one of [Ramanujan's] personal friends.' | "The two different ways are 1729 = 13 + 123 = 93 + 103. | "Generalizations of this idea have created the notion of "taxicab numbers".

e.g., "Are those the only taxicab numbers you know, HD?" "Yes, they are. The first time I ever heard them spoken of was in the movie _The Man Who Knew Infinity_. I read the book several years ago, not too long after it came out, but I don't remember seeing the term in the book."

submitted by HD Fowler

taximaximus - The point at which the tax level of an item becomes too high.

e.g., Gas tax is reaching its taximaximus.

submitted by Octomonkey

taxing - Used to replace the verb "to eat."

e.g., I am so hungry, I can't wait to tax on some Italian Beef sandwiches. I'd love to tax that ass.

submitted by Petey

taxu - (Command) "Give me a ride!" (patterned after Esperanto verb structure: words ending in -i are verb infinitives (hence "taxi"=to shuttle about, give a ride to); changing the -i to a -u makes the word a command (hence "taxu"=shuttle me about, give me a ride).

e.g., "Jeremy, you wanted some driving practice?" "Yeah! I gotta get a hundred hours before the end of the term." "Good, you can taxu for me today: I have a list about 17 hours long."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

tay - Term for a con or exceptional con-artist.

e.g., 1."Hey Jim, wanna pull a Tay on that old, rich lady who lives down the street?" 2."Damn girl, you're one hell of a Tay, you just conned that guy out of his life savings!"

submitted by Shaft

taz - To devour or consume quickly, to attack voraciously; from the "Tazmanian Devil" of Looney Toons lore.

e.g., I was so hungry by the time we got there that I completely tazzed the chicken pot pie.

submitted by Enrique Diaz

tazmagorical - Amazing, exciting, or of special importance. Especially when tied to conditions of snow, in skiing.

e.g., The snow was tazmagorical today. I couldn't believe the conditions.

submitted by ellie

tazzy - The condition of being in the mood to get very drunk.

e.g., I am so tazzy. Let's get drunk.

submitted by Adam Polselli

tchotchkeria - A place that sells tchotchkes. From Yiddish "tchotchke," meaning useless little object (knicknack), and Spanish "taqueria," meaning a restaurant that specializes in tacos and other Mexican fast food. Usually found in "quaint" towns, usually patronized almost exclusively by middle-class females of all ages, usually exuding a stench of potpourri all the way out to the sidewalk. Variations: "New Age tchotchkeria," a place which sells candles, incense, statues of goddesses, meditation cushions, etc.; and "upscale tchotchekeria," where you can buy Waterford crystal collectibles, Lladro figurines, and the like. The towns of New England are simply rife with tchotchkerias.

e.g., 1. I bought a clarity crystal at that New Age tchotchkeria in Harvard Square. 2. My mother wanted a lead crystal dinner bell, so I referred her to an upscale tchotchkeria in the Chestnut Hill Mall.

submitted by Sara - (www)

tchuber - Used to say "too bad," but in a funny form.

e.g., Tchuber for you.

submitted by blanks

tdtl - Too Dumb To Live.

e.g., Who let Chris in here? You know he's TDTL.

submitted by Sean Tomlinson

tdw - TurboDataWeasel. Someone who can't help breaking down and ingesting all the facts of a relatively mundane conversation.

e.g., "My friend is driving to Canada this week" "Wwhat car? What engine? etc." "Stop being an annoying TDW."

submitted by Fraser

te - Third person gender-neutral pronoun in the subject case. Rhymes with he, she. Used to describe an androgynous person, a person whose gender is uncertain or complicated, or a hypothetical person whose gender is irrelevant. Please see also ta, tai, tais, taself.

e.g., Te came back from the "Redefining Gender for the Post-postmodern Era" convention happy, exhausted, and coincidentally polygendered.

submitted by entitything

tea - Gossip, news, the real story. Presumably because people are likely to talk about such topics when they are having tea with their friends.

e.g., What's the tea, gir?

submitted by H D Fowler

tea bag - With the very rare exception of a few tag-along smart-aleck kids, make no mistake about it, what TEA (Taxed Enough Already) Party Patriots had in mind when they said to tea bag liberals and the White House was to send real tea bags to remind the Beltway politicians of the Boston Tea Party and what had happened when the eighteenth century populace got fed up with being overtaxed by a bullying, non-responsive, and remote government. Face it, most conservatives, by choice -- especially geezers and geezerettes -- are not as hip to the meaning of sex terms as I am. In the linked article there's a reference to irrumatio -- and I'll bet fewer than one in a hundred liberals or conservatives reading this know what the term means.

e.g., When you encouraged me to join you in sending tea bags to the White House, did I make even the remotest inference that you were asking me to join you in being a teabagger -- or that those to whom the tea bags were being sent were teabaggers? Of course not. To this day, I seriously doubt that you know what the vulgar slang sex term teabag means. You might know if your daughter or husband told you; otherwise, probably not. It's not the sort of thing your son or your classy friends are likely to tell you. Nota bene: I'm making no claim at all to being one of your classy friends; but, even so, I won't be telling you -- no matter what The Imp of the Perverse tells me to do.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tea party - English mountain biking term. To stop during a group ride and chat for ten minutes for no reason. Meetings also turn into tea parties. Both types of tea party are intensely annoying to people who are not interested in banal conversation about offspring, holidays, and new cars.

e.g., C'mon, we need to get going. Barney here has finished fixing his tyre, and there's a big black cloud over there. Break up this damn tea party.

submitted by Bent Udder - (www)

tea voider - "18th century colloquial term for a chamber pot."

e.g., "Princess Piffleberry always had her handy-dandy tea voider nearby, just in case she couldn't make it to the tinkle pantry in time."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tea-cup - Derived from the insult "mug," only to be used when acting like Rik from The Young Ones.

e.g., You're a tea-cup, aren't you, Neil?

submitted by Cat Stanley

teabag, teabagger, teabagging - Dummy entry. You can find out all you need to know about the word at the linked website.

e.g., Dummy entry, dummy.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

teachaphile - A teacher who always flirts with or hits on the girls in the class.

e.g., You: "Mr. Zafitzpatabek is a teachaphile." Friend who sits beside you: "Yeah, and why does he call her doll-face anyway?"

submitted by Kevin Stude..

teacher breath - A foul smelling breath brought on by excessive consumption of tea or coffee. Remarkably common in high-school teachers.

e.g., Don't get too near to Mr. Smith -- he has terrible teacher breath.

submitted by Luke McCarthy

teachnology - Educators who use and promote the use of information technology (ICT) in their classroom teaching.

e.g., With the coming of the next generation of native internet users, the only way for the teachers to shift is towards teachnology -- where technology becomes a necessary tool for every lesson.

submitted by Noraini Padillah

teahead - Devotee of the Canadian rock band, The Tea Party.

e.g., You know you're a teahead when you have replaced all other drinks in your diet with tea.

submitted by Kalira

team - Absolutely fantastic. From the band Team Plastique of Brisbane, Australia

e.g., You look team in that dress.

submitted by Matthew Heales

teamworking - For cooperation, even when working alone.

e.g., Thanks to our teamworking skills, we were able to create the illusion of productivity.

submitted by Michael - (www)

teapot - Slang for a friend who is confusing you.

e.g., Do what, teapot?

submitted by ash

teapoy - A teapoy is a small three-legged table, originally designed for holding tea, not for feet. This word was extensively used in the elementary school California Aptitude Test examples (memory and vocabulary test) to the point where anyone who grew up in the 1980s or 1990s would know the examples by heart by the time she reached high school. "Teapoy," "younker," "baloo," and "wuzzle" were all used together. It is quite common for most people who grew up in that time period not to remember any other vocabulary from the tests except the examples.

e.g., Is it hard to turn over a teapoy?

submitted by Raven

teapp - TEA Party Patriot.

e.g., It's hard for me to disagree with the tenets of the TEAPPs: fiscal responsibility, constitutionally limited government, and free markets.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

tearalong - A common, but little known, large feline.

e.g., Tearalong the dotted lion.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

teasearasa - A red-headed, sexy beauty from Canada.

e.g., Check out that teasearasa over there.

submitted by sven dangler

teaser - A teaser is what looks to be a vacant space to park your car from a distance, but when you get closer you realize one of those bloody compact cars is parked in the spot. Since they are so small, they are hidden by the larger cars surrounding them, thus creating the illusion of an empty space.

e.g., There's a space. There's a space. Right there. Oh, bugger, it's just a teaser.

submitted by shauny - (www)

teatable - From C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters. In a discussion of angels, used to describe one of the many ways angels have been portrayed in literature.

e.g., "...the frigid houris of a teatable paradise."

submitted by Jeff

teatrocity - A TEA Party atrocity. Such as Maryland's dimwit witch wannabe who ran for the Senate in 2010 -- what's-her-name. Suggested by a typo made by Paul Krugman in a September 11, 2011, blog post, "The years of shame." He closed with "Im not going to allow comments on this post, for obvious reasons," apparently concerned about the anger he would cause.

e.g., What teatrocity do you think they'll come up with next?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

teavangelical - According to Barry Popik in The Big Apple: "A 'teavangelist' (tea party supporter + evangelist) is a Christian minister who supports the tea partys political agenda. 'Teavangelist' has been cited in print since at least April 2010. An earlier use of 'teavangelist' meant 'an evangelist for tea' (instead of coffee or other drinks)." | A political conservative who is both an evangelical and a T.E.A. Party supporter. The first example comes from a comment to Mediate's "Don Imus On Rush Limbaugh: 'He's A Fat, Gutless, Pill-Popping Loser." -- a fallout of the March 2012 tempest in a teapot when Rush Limbaugh hinted on air that one Sandra Fluke might be either a prostitute or a slut. (I've seen no suggestion that Imus be fired again for his intemperate language on this.)

e.g., "And Imus paid the ultimate price, losing his show, whereas Rush will only lose a few advertisers and probably even gain more cred with loony teavangelicals." | Surely there's a special place in hell for conservatives and Republicans -- and for all those despicable teavangelists especially.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

teavules - Those tiny bits of tea leaves that escape from your tea bag and settle or float in your tea cup.

e.g., As Natasha held up the broken tea bag, she looked down in disgust at the teavules floating in her tea cup.

submitted by Susan

tebowed - To lose a game in the final moments after being in the lead.

e.g., Chris was on a roll and had the lead in flag football until T.J. tebowed him, giving him his first loss in almost a year.

submitted by TJ Carlson

tech - An adjective describing something that is new and technologicaly advanced.

e.g., That computer controlled GPS tracker for your truck is really tech.

submitted by Technoham

techier than thou - Patronizing attitude of highly technical people over less technically adept people, or a one-upmanship game played in technology companies where someone tries to show off her computer skills over inferiors.

e.g., The programmers are always so much techier than thou when they explain anything to the Marketing Department. Just as it should be, though, because the marketeers are not well-informed about technical issues.

submitted by Joel Parker

techknucklehead - Backroom unix geek not allowed to interact with clients.

e.g., I'll get the techknuckleheads to work on those cgi scripts right away.

submitted by m

technical difficulty - Any problem originating from one's body. For instance, indigestion or a bad headache. Especially used when one does not want to describe the exact nature of the problem as it is gross or too personal.

e.g., Sorry I wasn't able to make it to the party. I was having technical difficulty.

submitted by Meredith

technicalitician - From the root word "technical" and pronounced "teck-nee-kal-uh-tish-un": a person who gleefully enforces the letter of the law with complete disregard for the spirit of the law.

e.g., It's impossible to play Taboo with Julie Anne because she's too much of a technicalitician.

submitted by Julie Anne

technicolor yawn - Vomit.

e.g., I opened my mouth to speak, but all that came out was a technicolor yawn.

submitted by Mike

technicolour yawn - Vomiting.

e.g., Did you see that technicolour yawn Chris did over the entire deck? Gross.

submitted by JesusBuiltMyHotrod

techniculty - Technical difficulty.

e.g., Sorry to go offline abruptly -- Ii was experiencing a techniculty.

submitted by harry bennett

technidiot - A foolish person who has an aversion to electronic or digital products and systems. | A customer who would get technical support and still not understand how to check e-mail after a one-hour session.

e.g., My mom is a technidio. She thinks that Hotmail is a pornographic website.

submitted by Troy

techniqueey - A technical way of doing something. | Highly technical, intelligent, crafty, ALF-like and extraordinary, in a socially unacceptable manner.

e.g., You wrote the sentence in a techniqueey way that confuses me. | The burp sound that you created on the computer was so techniqueey.

submitted by George Grossman

techno-peasant - One who works with technologically advanced machines, and yet does not understand how they work. This may be most accurately used to describe those who work all day on the computer, but have to call in the Sysop when their screen freezes.

e.g., I may work for a software company, but as a secretary I am merely a techno-peasant. In 1989, I became a techno-peasant when hired to do data-entry for the federal government.

submitted by Anneke

technobabble - Jargon or terms used by computer support personnel when annoyed with customers and desring to belittle them. Any unintelligible gibberish that uses more acronyms or references to system or DOS than actual English.

e.g., "Well, your MIDI player must have caused a 404 in your DOS, which in turn corrupted your LAN and your OS. The whole DL is pretty much ruined until we reboot the Vx." "Umm, could you say that without the technobabble?"

submitted by Ben Johnson - (www)

technobabble generator - An annoying person who is an expert on an extremely boring subject and insists on using technical terms about his or her interests knowing that no one will understand. Normally shortened to TG.

e.g., Kirsty, quit being a TG. Talk about something we're interested in.

submitted by Xnoybis

technochallenged - Challenged by technology, often to the point of befuddlement.

e.g., A few geezers are, indeed, technochallenged; however, many of us simply aren't willing to waste any of our precious remaining time learning to use something we think dehumanizes us -- and in the process makes us stupid. We'll turn into cabbages or mush melons soon enough without any hastening, thank you very much.

submitted by HD Fowler

technochasm - The gap between the "haves" and "have nots" regarding technology.

e.g., The state of California is trying to bridge the technochasm in many of our schools.

submitted by Bill W.

technodunce - One lacking in any technical knowledge.

e.g., Don't ask me how to reconnect your modem, I'm a complete technodunce.

submitted by Adam Leslie

technofuse - To confuse with new and complex technology.

e.g., It seemed that every time I finally mastered the inner workings of my latest technological gadget, a newer, improved model would arrive to technofuse and challenge me once again.

submitted by Susanne Strickland

technogob - Someone who pretends to know more about computers than she really does and continually tries to baffle friends with techno talk. | A variation could be technoyob or technoyobbo for yobs or yobbos who do that sort of thing.

e.g., "Peter talks all the time about Internet details." "Yes, he's a technogob," replied John.

submitted by Kath

technoliteracy - Possessing the ability to work well with technology. Technoliterate.

e.g., A requirement of working here is a moderate level of technoliteracy.

submitted by BigAssFries - (www)

technologize - To apply technology

e.g., We technologize the operations of a mid-sized company

submitted by Kimber ley

technology butler - The Macmillan Dictionary: "a member of staff in a hotel whose job is specifically to perform technical tasks and help guests with computer-related problems. . . . A lexical variant is the countable noun compcierge, also the trademark of Compcierge USA, a company based in Washington D.C. that provides IT services for the travel and hotel industry."

e.g., "Wired travelers can ring for the Technology Butler, now on-call at The Ritz-Carlton, Phoenix to solve their computer and technological problems. Guests may reach the technology butlers for complimentary assistance without the inconvenience of leaving their guestroom." (Press Release -- Ritz-Carlton Phoenix, 2002)

submitted by HD Fowler

technomancer - A wizard of technology

e.g., The uuber hacker was considered a technomancer even within his own circle of friends.

submitted by GWN

technomasochist - 1. One who derives pleasure from being beaten with random computer/technology related parts. 2. One who purposely creates computer problems so that they may derive pleasure from solving them.

e.g., 1. Brad is a technomasochist. He once broke his hard drive by beating himself with it. 2. Malbolge ( ) is a language especially designed for programmers with a severe case of technomasochism.

submitted by Charlie

technopathy - Knowing we have the technology but not being bothered enough to use it.

e.g., His new mobile phone was so small technopathy dictated that text messages would only be sent with his old brick.

submitted by tracyb/timp

technopeasant - Low paid, unknowledgeable workers at large computer stores.

e.g., I hate when I can't figure out which network card to buy and the workers in the store are all technopeasants.

submitted by Larry and sean

technophobic - Unreasonable fear of any new technology.

e.g., I'm suprised that the word isn't already in the dictionary. Perhaps it would be if the originator wasn't technophobic.

submitted by Joe Gloor

technoplop - Computer or other technical terminology which makes no sense to the ordinary person

e.g., USB port? RAM chips? 26-pin SIMMs? Speak English. I don't understand that technoplop.

submitted by Pundette

technopoeia - (Gr. techne art, craft + gr poiein, to make or create) -- the poetic, visionary side of technology as a form of creativity.

e.g., Cities, bridges, rockets, telescopes, computers, as examples of technopoeia, are no less creative achievements of human genius than poems and dramas. All of them are born by the same force of imagination.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

technosis - Feeling of fear, confusion, dread, etc. brought on by technology

e.g., My wife's technosis is so bad she won't even use the electric can-opener.

submitted by Rosco Bell

technostalgic - A person having tremendous enthusiasm and love for technology.

e.g., Besides being creative copywriter i am also a technostalgic person.

submitted by kunal

technotard - Someone (like me) who, in spite of lacking the technology gene which allows one to easily absorb, apply, and master new technological skills, is slowly dragged, kicking and screaming, into the technological age.

e.g., I am a self-confessed technotard. Against all odds, I have accomplished setting up a Facebook page, although I still cannot master the skills needed to make an FB Fan page go live. That would require DNA reprogramming. Incredibly, however, I have been able to upload photos and videos to FB, an accomplishment that is especially gratifying for any technotard. If I get any better at this, I might have to turn in my technotard membership card.

submitted by Christine Cowley

technotic - Any boring, droning electronic dance music designed to be enjoyed only by "happy" people; describes almost all music played at a rave; in the state of being bored by any bad disco influenced music.

e.g., This place is so technotic only ravers could enjoy it.

submitted by Keith

technovelty - The latest technological gadget that is more a conversation piece than a necessity.

e.g., His parents wouldn't allow him to spend his allowance on the compact retractable shoestring lacer, saying it was a technovelty that would soon end up in a drawer.

submitted by Beverly Larsen

technowar - This is a progressive electric music style in most of techno, electro, proggi, house, trance, breakbeat music.

e.g., You wanna' know what I'm really into these days? Technowar. It's the coolest. What I'm having trouble figuring out, though, is that since I've started listening to it I have a lot of headaches -- and hearing loss, too.

submitted by Laszlo Tavasz

techorexia - Skipping meals due to extreme focus on computer programming tasks.

e.g., After realizing that he had consumed nothing but Mountain Dew in the two weeks since installing Linux, Jim was forced to admit he had techorexia.

submitted by mc

techsodermist - One who stuffs a dead tech company with filler or fluff in the hopes of convincing someone to buy it.

e.g., They hired a techsodermist to spin their dotcom as a new idea to some investors.

submitted by cinderella

techtarded - Said of people who can't figure out how to hook up DVD players, any type of game consoles, cones, take a while to figure out how to hang up on their smart phones, can't program the clock on the microwave or the digital watch they bought their kid. Techtards are people who leave a random word like cones in a sentence because they can't figure out how to move the cursor on their phone screen to go back and erase it, and don't know why the word cones is even there.

e.g., Everyone will know I'm severely techtarded after reading my description of techtarded.

submitted by molly

tecknockergy - Abbreviated form of "knocker technology"; a boob job.

e.g., A woman getting a bad boob job would be a victim of tecknockergy gone wrong.

submitted by mike wiebel

ted - Totally EavesDropping. Used to describe the art of listening in on others' conversations.

e.g., Ted: Can you hear them? Ed: Oh, yeah. I am TED right now.

submitted by Laura

teddy-bare - The condition of most women, shortly after coming to bed, dressed only in lingerie.

e.g., Debra came to bed, clad only in her latest Victoria's Secret acquisition. In less than a minute, she was teddy-bare.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

tediate - To annoy with meaningless blather.

e.g., You aren't really contributing anything by all that. You are just tediating me.

submitted by Louise Van Hine - (www)

tedides - (ted-EE-deez; n.) 1. voters; 2. anybody that has voted in an election of any kind (as opposed to those who have not); 3. enfranchised citizens (as opposed to second-class citizens of whatever kind who haven't got the right to vote). [From the "I Voted!" stickers often given out by those staffing the polls; in particular, such a sticker with the O of voted having been replaced by a large thumbprint. One year, I really needed new glasses but did not have them yet, and as we approached the elementary school where voting was taking place, I could see people wearing these stickers that said, so far as I could tell, "I ted!" I had no idea what the big thumbprint was, and the V was red like one of those "I whatever" badges. I asked what the "I Love Ted" badges were all about, and everyone thought I was very clever and witty, and laughed obligingly, but I had to squint my way into figuring out what the silly stickers said. But by that time, it was too late: It's stuck in my head as "I Love Ted." The Greek suffix "-ides" means "son of" or "child of," as in Zeus Kronides "Zeus, son of Kronos." So, everyone who votes is a "child of Ted." ... true story.)

e.g., The tedides have spoken: the town will float a bond for a new skateboard park.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

teefed - To borrow something and never to give it back.

e.g., Kat teefed my favourite red shirt and i haven't seen it since!

submitted by Natasha Kovacevic

teejayed - Dejected; rejected; semi-suicidal

e.g., Did you see Chris the other day? He looked so teejayed he could have pulled a gun on us at any moment.

submitted by John and Marshall

teenage wasteland - Any tacky-looking teen magazine such as Teen, 16, J14, etc., as deals in the likes of pop music, films, TV shows, etc., having a rather tacky appeal. From the teen magazine "Teenage Wasteland" as Debbie Thornberry can be seen reading in many an episode of The Wild Thornberrys, ultimately from a song by The Who.

e.g., Teenage Wasteland AGAIN?!

submitted by Larry Ellis Reed - (www)

teenglish - The pseudo-dialect of the English language spoken by teenagers. | c: From the Macmillan Dictionary, as a real word: "English used by teenagers. It is a blend of the words 'teenage' and 'English' and refers especially to words not used in standard English or words used with different meanings from standard English."

e.g., John spent his 14th birthday with his friends, playing video games and speaking teenglish. || "Teenagers will no doubt be cringeing at this, but a dictionary of 'teenglish' has been published to help parents better understand what their youngsters are talking about." | I had trouble keeping up with what my kids said when they were teenagers. If I could get them to say anything at all, they mostly spoke in teenglish.

submitted by Vaughan Milligan | HD Fowler - (www)

teeniney - Very, very small.

e.g., Cinderella reputedly had teeniney feet.

submitted by haagatha

teentastic - Those crazy, fun, fantastic times during one's teenage years. Those unique times that you can only experience when in your teens.

e.g., Upon spotting a group of teenagers having a good time, "Looks like they're having a teentastic time." upon a new teen's 13th birthday that happens to fall on a Friday: "have a teentastic weekend!"

submitted by jaye

teeny bopper - The son or daughter of a boxer. From "teeny" meaning small; "bopper" meaning someone who hits.

e.g., Mohammed Ali's children are teeny boppers.

submitted by Michael Katz

teepeekaboo - Looking for toilet paper by opening and closing cabinet doors, drawers, closet doors, and the like; usually preceded by a person going to the bathroom and looking over to see a naked cardboard roll where the toilet paper should be.

e.g., Thanks for leaving me with no toilet paper. I had to play teepeekaboo until I found some in the cabinet under the sink.

submitted by jay donaldson - (www)

teet - Teat.

e.g., ~ "They don't make union thugs like they used to -- too well-to-do and living high off government teets."

submitted by [Pascal] - (www)

teet - Teat.

e.g., They dont make union thugs like they used to: too well-to-do and living high off of government teets."

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

teethpaste - A variant of "toothpaste."

e.g., Rats. Looks like I'm off to the store to buy some more teethpaste. I hate to wait another minute without brushing my tooths.

submitted by Klamath

teetotality - Unattainably healthy state

e.g., She's headed to Betty Ford to work on achieving teetotality.

submitted by pudders - (www)

teflet - Small flake of Teflon from a cheap non-stick pan.

e.g., He told her that the bits in the egg were pepper, even though he knew they were probably teflets.

submitted by Brave Sir Robin

tegism - Teg -- the end game; ism -- belief, philosophy, school of thought. Transfer of life form or spirit to another place at the moment of death, accepted as authoritative by some group or school.

e.g., The moment when he passed from this life to web life and achieved tegism, he became an online spirit.

submitted by tegerdine

teh - Misspelling of "the." Indicates that teh sentence to follow is not to be taken seriously.

e.g., Teh money ate my dishwasher.

submitted by Benjamin Nelson - (www)

teholasting - Switching beverages during a night of drinking.

e.g., I was drinking beer for awhile but then I started drinking rum and cokes.

submitted by Michael

tehuti - (Rhymes with "day-DOO-tee," n.) 1. A writer, especially a teacher of writing; 2. The person charged with taking care of all report writing, bureaucratic minutia, telephone calls, and so forth; 3. The person who's really in charge of an office (the secretary, rather than the officer). [From the original name of the Egyptian god of knowledge and writing, called by the Greeks 'Thoth'; originally dhwty "ibis-like," sometimes reconstructed djehuty.]

e.g., "Elsa---that's Miss Pavian to you---will be your tehuti." "My what?" "Your composition teacher." || "Okay, our company will need a president, a vice-president, and a secretary." "I voluteer for tehuti." "Te---what's a tehuti?" "Secretary." "Oh. Okay." || "Wow, what a secretarial pool. How many secretaries do you need." "Oh, pretty much all of them. But the tehuti is that woman six rows back on the far left." "The tehuti? Oh, the real power in the office, huh?" "Yup."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

tek - Superior; high-class.

e.g., Your baseball cards are ted.

submitted by sagar - (www)

tekillya - An alcoholic beverage of Mexican heritage. Consuming mass quantities is known "to kill ya." Pronounced similarly to the word "Tequila."

e.g., "Come on, a couple shots of Tequila will do us good." "No way buddy, there's a reason why they call it tekillya..."

submitted by Salty

teleblabarious - A description of someone who keeps talking on the phone when your'e desperate to hang up.

e.g., I tried to get online last night. but my mate was being teleblabarious.

submitted by Harry - (www)

telecrastination - Always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.

e.g., If you telecrastinate a bit, you won't seem so anxious for a call.

submitted by Linda Lu - (www)

telefire - "telephone pole, used at an early age, and the whole family has been using it ever since"

e.g., "Mama mama! Look at the telefires!"

submitted by n holmes

telegenetic - A breakdown at the cellular level, causing the inability of molecules to keep form and order. This condition causes a literal blinking of genetic makeup in space time, so the subject cannot maintain cellular build and changes or disappears at random intervals. This condition is usually caused by traveling through time without proper constraints to maintain genetic placement.

e.g., Upon returning through the black hole, John recognized instantly that he had typed the wrong settings into his gravity adjustment module, causing himself and his crew to become telegenetic.

submitted by Shelby Smith

telekepsychic - To be able to place one's thoughts into another's mind; the person able to place her thoughts into another's mind.

e.g., My friend Gavin is telekepsychic: at lunch today, he made me think about killing the evil plant in the courtyard. I went to the telekepsychic for a tarot reading, but she just convinced me to pay her money instead.

submitted by Alison

telekinesium - A mineral that gives the user the telekinetic power.

e.g., My brother tried to use that rock as if it were telekinesium.

submitted by Sera - (www)

telent - To suffer from the inability to type correctly when someone is standing behind you. Even simple words are typed incorrectly because the person typing is conscious of the person standing behind her.

e.g., Fred gets telent really bad when John stands behind him. You can barely understand what he's typing.

submitted by Kevin Sale

telepalooza - A TV show that was once great, but has since "jumped the shark."

e.g., "Behind the Music" used to be fine, but now it's telepalooza incarnate.

submitted by Paul

telepanhandler - Any telephone solicitor who tries to separate you from your money.

e.g., His dinner was importunately interrupted by a telepanhandler soliciting contributions for the Fraternal Order of Police.

submitted by Karl Pfeifer

telepathetic - To have telepathic skills that are no good to anybody. | A person in online chats who is always talking about how hard her life is. | A person who claims to have telepathic abilities, and is labeled by government "telepathetic."

e.g., He was telepathetic. He could tell when a bear was hungry. | God, she's telepathetic. | The guy on your left has been tagged telepathetic on two different occasions.

submitted by briantginge | Razor Edalb | T. Ellie Pat

telepathetic - Someone who is without telepathic ability, in a society or world where everyone is a telepath.

e.g., On certain other worlds I am sadly regarded as telepathetic, which is like being blind or deaf or defective. But somehow I manage to get around and survive, even famously.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

telephallic - Of sexual communication without recourse to the senses -- between two persons.

e.g., Sensing a sudden warmth in her groin Sheila knew that at that moment her boyfriend was sending her a telephallic message.

submitted by Cecil Pinto

telephone pole - Used to indicate that a change in the topic of conversation is seriously needed.

e.g., Justin: So then I found out that she liked to put cat food on her pizza. Jen: Did anyone just see that telephone pole fly through the room?

submitted by Adam

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