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l - (n.) 1. (a group of) Fifty; 2. The fiftieth thing (in a series, e.g., birthdays, dollars, etc.); 3. Someone 50 years old; 4. 20 inches (50 cm); 5. The Biblical year of Jubilee (Lev. 25); 6. Any big celebration of the completion of something. (Adj.) 7. Half, 50%; 8. ("Ls," pronounced "elz") even money (as in 50/50 odds); 9. Fifty years old. (v.) 10. To finally complete something; 11. to cut something in half. [From the Roman numeral L = 50.]

e.g., I am L, but I don't want a cake with candles; I'd rather have a pizza with an L on it in pepperoni. | "This two-by-four is twice as long as the space." "So L it."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

l 7 - A square. A person whose hipness is non-existent.

e.g., Frank´s just an L 7 -- he´s more chess board than human.

submitted by A Bergman

l.b.t. - (ell-bee-tee; n.) a 'little black thing' that shows up in food, drink, ointment, unguent, salve, or whatever, and makes the eater or user unwilling to continue eating or using it.

e.g., "Ack! what is that?" "What is what?" "That! Is it a weevil? a scab? a louse?" "That's an l.b.t.; that's all." "what? what? what's an l.b.t.?" "a little black thing, of course." "So I ask you 'what is that little black thing, and you tell me 'it's a little black thing,' and that's supposed to help?" "Okay ... it's a peppercorn---well, part of a peppercorn. ...I think." "Oh great. I don't think I'm hungry anymore."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

l.m.c. - L.M.C. = "Low Marble Count" (see marble count), a condition of memory, or mental ability failure, frequently accompanied by destinesia. (See oldtimer's disease.)

e.g., What was I going to tell you? I must have had an attack of L.M.C.

submitted by Jay Clark

l16 - To go L16 is to become haughty and precious in the glow of your own ego -- a dandy or popinjay. Think Louis XVI.

e.g., Beaufort answered a few Jeopardy questions right and quickly got L16 on the other contestants.

submitted by Busta Shoelace

l33t syndrome - A common disease that infects children, usually male, between the ages of 13 and 17. Symptoms include a propensity to use numbers and misspellings (as well as mispunctuation) in place of proper 'net English, a terrible need to prove oneself, and many other annoying habits that only script kiddies and l33t h4x0R boys (and girls) have.

e.g., My learned colleague would have presented a compelling argument, had he remembered to keep his l33t syndrome symptoms down. As it is, he sounds like a prat more than an intellectual.

submitted by nyarlahotep

l7 - Square.

e.g., You turned her down? You are sooooo L7.

submitted by Loz M.

l8r - An abbreviated form of "See you later," or "Talk to you later" usually found toward the end of an e-mail.

e.g., Nice website, guys! Good job. L8r E.

submitted by Emlyn - (www)

la de freaking da - This term is a response to be used when somebody tells you some insignificant piece of information that you couldn't care less about.

e.g., Paul - Hey, did you hear that Iggy Pop has a new album out? Me - La de freaking da.

submitted by orion - (www)

la esquela - Said after somebody just got made fun of. From the Spanish "the school." La esquela'd--got made fun of.

e.g., If Dan has big ears, and Tom said to him: "Your ears are bigger than Dumbo's!" then somebody could say "La esquela!" OR if Tom said: "Lauryn, you're an idiot," then Lauryn could say "I just got la esquela'd."

submitted by lauryn

la la la - Somewhat humorously used in place of any noun when you're too lazy to think of the actual word, especially if you know the person you're addressing will know what you mean. Invented by Steve Eddington.

e.g., Do you have time to drive me to the la la la?

submitted by Carole Eddington - (www)

la-la land - A place where the Tooth Fairy and Dracula have tea parties and people visit quite often when extrenely bored. Other residents include the Easter Bunny, Bigfoot, and a bowl of munchkins. Not enough munchkins for a symphony, but enough for a big band sound from the 1930s and 1940s.

e.g., Biology last period was La-la Land.

submitted by Sam McCool

labatyd - Life's A Bitch And Then Ya Die. Usually in response to whining complaints.

e.g., Red. Can you believe it? He only gave me a 3% raise. Jed. Yeah, yeah, LABATYD.

submitted by Gregory Bloom

label whore - Someone who only wears brand name clothes, with the name of the brand usually placed somewhere for all to see. A walking advertisement for a clothing store or brand.

e.g., Look at that spaz wearing all Abercrombie -- what a label whore.

submitted by nickqt

label-rocking - The act of wearing brand name clothes, with the name of the brand usually placed somewhere for all to see.

e.g., Look at Sean label-rocking with his Tommy shirt, Polo jeans and Fila sneaks.

submitted by Louis

laboodle - Spunk, pizzazz, or craziness.

e.g., Michelle says she went wild and showed a lot of laboodle after her divorce came through.

submitted by Emily Elizabeth

labrachow - A Labrachow is a dog that is a cross between a Labrador Retriever and a Chow.

e.g., My dog Dexter is a very sweet and lovable Labrachow.

submitted by Ellen Dockery

labradoodle - A breed of dog that is a mix between a Labrador Retriever and a poodle.

e.g., What is that? Is that a labradoodle walking down the street?

submitted by Chris

labrat - A system administrator, webmaster or programmer who virtually lives in a corporate computer laboratory. Distinguishable from average humans by one or more of the following traits: ghastly pallor (see screentan), dependence on caffeine-rich beverages and snack foods, inability to remember the names of close family members, intolerance for AOL users and a curiously extensive knowledge of government security agencies and firewall software. Etymology: probably derived from ancient Geek

e.g., Trying to supervise labrats is like trying to herd cats.

submitted by George Pateman - (www)

labrawhatsahoosa - A mongrel--a dog that is part everything, but all of nothing.

e.g., What sort of dog is that? Is it a labrawhatsahoosa?

submitted by human_baboon

laced banana - 1. Someone with mental health concerns who is receiving medical treatment vis-a-vis medication. 2. A psychiatric patient.

e.g., My doctor just put me on anti-depressants. I guess that makes me another laced banana.

submitted by Richard Tosh

lachrymology - Crying as therapy.

e.g., Tool seemed to make up the theory of lachrymology.

submitted by Kay - (www)

lachrymotormouth - One who can't stop talking about her troubles. A non-stop whiner.

e.g., I had to get away from that lachrymotormouth. He moaned the blues for 45 minutes straight.

submitted by Kenny Nottingham

lack 'o wanna - Alternatively, lackowanna. No desire or inclination to do something or other, at all.

e.g., Even though I put all my cards on the table, Miss Penellope Goodenough exhibited complete lackowanna to my generous proposals.

submitted by P I Edic - (www)

lack-a-nookie - No sex for a long time.

e.g., She's grumpy because she's suffering from lack-a-nookie.

submitted by Nikki Sokol

lackabowliosis - This word describes a BLAH feeling. When you lack a . . . umm . . . bowl.

e.g., I don't want to go out tonight; I'm suffering from a bad case of lackabowliosis.

submitted by polkadotcandycane@yahoo.com

lackavation - State where you are so hungry you don't know what to do.

e.g., I haven't eaten in two days, I think I might die from lackavation.

submitted by Alex Berube

lacker - Lackers have plenty of time to do good, but they lack any inclination to do so. They prefer to spend their time amusing themselves causing strife and making trouble (cf. lacker attacks). | Someone lacking the wherewithal to make a positive contribution: lack of attitude, knowledge, smarts, etc.

e.g., I have to spend a lot more time and money than I want to fending off lacker attacks on my sites. | From what I see, those who Occupy Wall Street pretty much qualify as lackers.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

lackluster - Blockbuster Video. Also "Schlockbuster."

e.g., I think we're going to make it a Lackluster night.

submitted by Name Withheld

lacktion - Lack of action with a situation.

e.g., I am very upset with my boss's lacktion on resolving this issue.

submitted by Len Peralta - (www)

lacrosstitute - Young women and girls who hang around lacrosse arenas and fields trying to get picked up by lacrosse players.

e.g., The girls at the game last night were lacrosstitutes.

submitted by Dan

lactard - A lactose intolerant person.

e.g., I can't drink milk -- I'm a lactard.

submitted by Dana Baguley

lactaunt - To bait, tease, or provoke regarding breastfeeding issues, specifically from the perspective of those in support of breastfeeding rights.

e.g., The open-shirted gang of young mothers lactaunted and heckled the businessman lunching next to them in the mall for expressing disapproval of their child-feeding activities.

submitted by Mark Lee - (www)

lactomangulate - (v) To mangle the "open here" side of the milk carton so badly that you have to resort to the other side.

e.g., Dammit, Erle, you sure lactomangulated that one.

submitted by philip dent

lactomangulation - What happens when you have trouble opening a milk carton and eventually have to go the "illegal" side of the carton.

e.g., I'm such an expert at lactomangulation that I've given up and just buy my milk in bottles now.

submitted by Tam

lad's jack - Men's room.

e.g., "Cliona and Scott are fit to kill me so I agree to get rid of the James and Deirdre. I drag James off to the lad's jacks for a chat. So I ask him if he remembers the conversation I had a long time ago with him regarding his embarrassing me . . . in front of my workmates. He doesn't remember that conversation."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

lada - Overly plain and simple, to the point of being not actually very usable. Origin: the Russian automotive manufacturer Lada, responsible for the very plain, very simple, unreliable Lada Niva.

e.g., The website he had built was lada. I could tell he had designed it himself, but what I couldn't tell was how anyone else would know how to use it.

submitted by alan - (www)

ladder lil - Person who slept her way to the top.

e.g., Unknown to him, he had married a ladder lil who decided his rung was not high enough or the view good enough. So she climbed a bunch more ladders until she got to the top.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

ladgerous - Silly, stupid, fixilated, etc.

e.g., You are a very ladgerous child.

submitted by Alexandra Washington

lady lumps - Breasts, otherwise known as boobs.

e.g., Listen, pal, it's one thing to make remarks about her beautiful green eyes, but saying anything about her glorbs or her lady lumps is out of bounds.

submitted by HD Fowler

lady marmalade - Cool, beautiful, impressive.

e.g., Madi's new belt was very lady marmalade.

submitted by madi - (www)

lady of negotiable affections - "B-girl, bag, bawd, bimbo, blower, broad, call girl, camp follower, cat, chicken, chippie, chippy, concubine, courtesan, fallen woman, floozy, harlot, hooker, hostess, hustler, lady of the evening, lady of the night, loose woman, midnight cowboy, model, moll, nymph, nymphet, nymphomaniac, painted woman, party girl, pickup, pink pants, pro, prostitute, scarlet woman, slut, streetwalker, strumpet, tart, tomato, tootsie, tramp, trollop, white slave, whore, working girl." More recent neologisms incude slore (slut-whore).

e.g., Quiz results - May 2006: "When lonely and down on his luck, Harpo traded his Masonic pin for the attentions of a lady of negotiable affections."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

ladyjaning - Getting in someone's way by standing exactly where she plans to be in the next minute. (Origin: my cat, Lady Jane, who does this unerringly.)

e.g., I was intending to sit there, but I was ladyjaned by my husband.

submitted by Joyce - (www)

laerio - An unidentified and unpleasant liquid or gooey substance.

e.g., Eeww! You sat in laerio.

submitted by EP

lafayette left - Any congested traffic situation whereby the driver has to make a series of right turns when making a left would've sufficed. Coined because of the traffic situation in Lafayette, LA (population about 200,000) where it's impossible to turn left anymore.

e.g., Whenever I leave my friend's apartment to head to work, I usually have to make a Lafayette left so I can blend in with the traffic instead of going against it.

submitted by Jerdog

laffin - Scouse, the native tongue of people from Liverpool, UK, for great, fine, brilliant.

e.g., Roger Ebert 's revied indicated Sin City was laffin.

submitted by Malcolm

lag - Convict or ex-convict. British slang.

e.g., "Paris Hilton conned doctors into releasing her early from jail, furious fellow lags claimed last night." | "Another former lag Cynthia Chavez, 53, said: 'You have to be dying to get transferred out of here. It’s wrong.'"

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

lag it - To be slow at doing something

e.g., "Marie lagged it for an hour before she left to the market." Marie took an hour to leave after she said she was going to the market.

submitted by il

lagfest - Used to describe excessive lag, predominantly in online computer games.

e.g., "You gonna come play tomorrow night?" "Yeah, but I have a feeling it'll be a lagfest."

submitted by blahblogger - (www)

lagged up - Used to describe a person who is a slow thinker, or exceptionally dumb.

e.g., The members of that debate team are lagged up, so this should be no problmem.

submitted by marko

lagger - One who lags behind and keeps you waiting for her.

e.g., 1. Nelson said he'd call but he never did. What a lagger. 2. We waited for Maria for an hour--she's such a lagger.

submitted by Maria n Valo

lagniappe - Used in the South (Southern Louisiana and Mississippi) to mean a little gift, a bonus, something extra.

e.g., To see it, you’ll have to do a view source and look for the lagniappe.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

lagulator - Someone on an internet game whose high ping slows that entire game down.

e.g., Argghhh, it's too slow. Kick the lagulator out.

submitted by tibrin wasaki

lahwho - (lah-hoo) A false god, an invented god, not the real thing at all, a poor representation of the Ultimate and True and Real GOD which Is that which It Is, if any.

e.g., You'd be surprised how many gods or Gods or The God are actually no more than a lahwho, quite erroneous and inaccurate on all accounts.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

laid-up - Being so busy with obligations that you cannot be reached.

e.g., I was laid-up with studying this weekend so I couldn't return your call.

submitted by Kym Q

laidez - Easy to pick up--laid easily.

e.g., Check out those laidez in the short skirt.

submitted by dark

laker - Redneck, or bad 80s clothes, rocker tees, bright tees, lots of hairspray, drives Thunderbirds or Mustangs.

e.g., Chrissy is my favorite laker.

submitted by Chrissy Gorman

lakierashes - A term meaning good luck or good fortune to you.

e.g., As Billy was going up to bat, Jim called out, "Lakierashes."

submitted by fred anderson

lalaland - A world where sleep may take over, or you are lucky enough to have an imagination equiped to take you there.

e.g., The moofflowers were ablaze in color, the music drifted from all around, here in my lalaland.

submitted by Maribee

lalamoment - A moment in time wheo one has slow reaction time.

e.g., The girl always has lalamoments.

submitted by Chelsea - (www)

laldie - A state of great high spirits while putting a great deal of effort into something. Usually drunken karaoke singing. Originated in Glasgow (the Scottish one, not any of the American, Canadian, or Australian ones, which I am sure are all very nice).

e.g., You should have heard Billy singing in the pub -- he gave it laldie.

submitted by Scooter

lambasted - Confused, bewildered, surprised.

e.g., Katie was lambasted when Stephanie told her that her boyfriend punched her in the nose. Even though it was an accident.

submitted by Katie

lambastigate - Combination of the words "lambast"and "castigate." Originated in Bournemouth, England, 2003.

e.g., Stop lambastigating me.

submitted by Andrew

lambineighting - A new type of self-contradicting joke. Cf. laminating.

e.g., When I found Dimetrodon's obituary, it wasn't on the obituaries page. It was entitled "Every Lamb in Eight" and had a picture of a baby lamb. In fact, it didn't even mention Dimetrodon. I'm almost certain that was my first experience with lambineighting.

submitted by Adam Leslie

lame - Cheap.

e.g., I think you like laming around.

submitted by Paddy

lame-inator - "That" person at a party or any other social gathering who is the first person to say no to a zany idea or want to go home.

e.g., John, I can't believe you, of all people, are being such a lame-inator. It's only midnight.

submitted by Lisa

lamecalling - The sort of namecalling seen on Internet discussion boards. Namecalling so lame it’s no fun at all. The kind where the response is always along the lines, “Alright already. Stop with the ad hominem attacks.” The response is almost invariably made by someone anxious to show the extent of her Latin vocabulary — someone who concurrently shows her poor grasp of English by writing “alright” rather than “all right.”

e.g., So, who do you think’s the worst lamecaller on Punch/CounterPunch these days?

submitted by HD Fowler

lamenoxious - Lame and obnoxious.

e.g., Why are you always using these words you make up that none of the rest of us have ever heard of? That's lamenoxious.

submitted by Matt

lamer - Someone in a strategy, combat, or other style of multiplayer competitve game who uses tactics which are either unskilled, particularly cowardly, or ludicrously easy to pull off (compared to their effectiveness). That is, someone who is being "cheap" or "lame" in a game.

e.g., 1. What a lamer strategy. Chris is a lamer.

submitted by Dragonnas

lamina - A hybrid between lameness and stamina.

e.g., You sat through a two hour meeting on "team spirit"; not falling asleep must have taken some lamina.

submitted by fool - (www)

laminatrix - A sexy woman who laminates.

e.g., That Sera is one hot laminatrix. Heat me up again, baby.

submitted by Sera

laminosity - Incredibly weak, lame, or pathetic. So bad it's almost good again.

e.g., Your laminosity at Pac Man makes me look like an expert.

submitted by Mischy Tiffty - (www)

lampostie - Another word for lampost, plural being lamposties. It's also much easier to say.

e.g., Oh look, the lamposties have turned on.

submitted by Angela

lampshade - A device which shades a lamp's light, therefore defeating the original purpose of turning the lamp on. But it looks cool.

e.g., You don't want to turn on a lamp without a lampshade ... after all, its in a lamp's nature to brighten a room.

submitted by The Berkinator

lamy - Love And Miss You.

e.g., See you in a couple of days. LAMY.

submitted by leasi

lan - Local Area Network, a place where people meet and bring their computers with them, to link the computers and share files and play games.

e.g., You going to the LANS in Christchurch this weekend? I'm gonna play Tony Hawks Skateboarding 3 with some people.

submitted by Calso

land monster - A ridiculously ugly large woman. Sightings usually occur in rural areas at trailer parks, fast food joints, bowling alleys, and of course Wal-Mart.

e.g., Were there any hot girls at the fair? No, but there were a couple of land monsters that would make Bigfoot sick.

submitted by Ben

land of lost socks - A mythical place where every small household item with the ability to vanish just as you need it eventually winds up. Originally the final destination of socks that vanish from the dryer.

e.g., I can't find the scotch tape anywhere and I know I bought a new roll just the other day. It must have gone to the land of lost socks or something.

submitted by Shaduan

land of sugar - This is a term we use at Lutheran Campus Ministry to mean Perkins Restaraunt. Occasionally, can also mean Denny's or any other eating establishment of that same sort.

e.g., Glen: Anybody wanna go to the Land of Sugar? Various assorted LCM people: Sure.

submitted by Rainbow Woman

land yacht - An extremely large car, especially from the 70s.

e.g., The '73 Cadillac is a land yacht.

submitted by Jim M - (www)

land-o-goshen - My mother used this term as an exclamation. Of Biblical origin. The land the Israelites were given following their 40-year wander in the desert. 1. The best of Pharoah's land. 2. A place of refuge where Pharoah's army was not allowed to enter. 3. A land that was blessed by God. 4. A land protected by God. 5. A place of peace. 5. The term has two, seemingly opposite meanings, and that's why I want to put it in here! The people I've heard use it (like my mother) do so in a slightly negative manner, pertaining to yet another hard task that has popped up but that needs doing. I don't know how this got transliterated to an expression denoting NOT a peaceful place, it may have originated in the South, where my mother grew up. Perhaps it refers to wishing one was in the "Land of Goshen" and didn't have to do this task, thereby attaining Peace. My best guess!

e.g., Land-o-Goshen, I've got a mountain of laundry to do! | Land-o-Goshen, how DID your dress get so dirty?!

submitted by Glenna Foreman

landdroner - The vestige of a once nicely tuned Landrover following years of off-road abuse.

e.g., I could hear the Landdroner coming from half a mile away.

submitted by stella whyte - (www)

landfill - What the passengers hope Captain Phil will do safely at the end of their flight.

e.g., Captain Phil's plane was plagued with problems. When engine number two sputtered and died, the passengers cried out, "For God's sake, landfill!"

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

landing strip - The pubic area of a woman shaved in a rectangular strip shape.

e.g., Jennifer and I had sex together for the first time last night. It was nice to see she had a well-groomed landing strip instead of a giant shrub.

submitted by Tom

landlard - The fathead landlord who won't fix the heat.

e.g., My apartment is freezing and the landlard won't fix the heat.

submitted by Kate

landline - A good old phone line, with actual copper cables. Or a phone that's attached to such a line.

e.g., I can't hear a thing you're saying. Hold on, lemme call you from a landline.

submitted by DavidJ!

lando - (v) To betray. Inspired by that snake-in-the-grass Lando Calrissian.

e.g., Can you believe the way Jesse stole my girl? He landoed me.

submitted by Waffles

landrunder - Four-wheel-drive vehicle on very soft ground.

e.g., Des: My dad has a Landrunder. S: A Landrunder? Des: Yes, it sank in the mud.

submitted by Des Healey

landscraper - Same meaning as landscaper but obviously more descriptive and understandable.

e.g., We hired an excellent landscraper to redo our yard.

submitted by jerry giberti

landscraping - Last bit of detail work done to a new lawn before seeding.

e.g., My backyard is almost ready to seed and fertilize, just needs a bit more landscraping.

submitted by fred wickens - (www)

landshark - People with malevolent intentions who are on the scam for the opposite sex.

e.g., The landsharks quickly began to circle their prey.

submitted by nitag - (www)

landy - A Land Rover, as said by English farmers.

e.g., I've bought a new Landy.

submitted by Jack Stringer - (www)

langauge - A meter for local area network performance (sometimes mis-spelled as "language").

e.g., The English Co. makes a really good langauge; it is recommended that we adopt English as a first langauge.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

langers - To be drunk.

e.g., After drinking 10 pints of guinness, I was langers drunk

submitted by rory

languaphobia - The fear of using the English language properly.

e.g., Because he has languaphobia, Damon often resorts to verbizing or substituing a pseudoword, even when perfectly good English is available.

submitted by Rick Feldkamp - (www)

langusecond - Cross between language and second. When a radio station is changed, this is the time between when the listener realizes the language is foreign and when the body instantly changes the station.

e.g., I was driving near the border, looking for a strong station. It was a langusecond when I found a station and then changed it because I could not understand anything that was being said.

submitted by Mallard

lanhiage - A language created by not correcting typos.

e.g., Oops... Great typo. We'll add that one to the lanhiage.

submitted by Peter

lankie - Slang term for a Sri Lankan.

e.g., Was he a Lankie?

submitted by drdevious - (www)

lapanickel - A slap you make on your knee when you laugh extremely hard.

e.g., The emcee was lapanickel funny.

submitted by Joni Brandt - (www)

laprechaun - A leprechaun who will sit in your lap if only you will give him (back) a piece of his gold, and he might even dance a jig on the lap.

e.g., I have me a gold piece, now all I need is to find me a genuine laprechaun.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

laption - The actions associated with a lapdance.

e.g., "Tonight I am going to go out and get some laption!"

submitted by h_ank

laptop - Anything, such as a cat, small dog, or small child that you can use to wriggle out of chores by persuading one to clamber up for a story or stroke of the ears.

e.g., I'd take the rubbish out, but I'm busy with the laptop.

submitted by annelise dunn

laptoppin - The public use of a laptop computer.

e.g., She was at Starbucks laptoppin.

submitted by Andrew Stubbs Johnston - (www)

laputanck - Cheap book.

e.g., I'm a bit low on cash for the brand new edition. I'll just buy a laputanck instead. Most likely online.

submitted by Hannah - (www)

lapvermin - Those index card-sized pieces of advertising fluff that fall into your lap when you're trying to read a zine.

e.g., Cripes, Margaret. How many lapvermin can they put in one friggin' issue of Oprah?

submitted by Roger Mexico

laquidate - To make up a multisyllable word with no meaning during conversations to appear smarter than you really are.

e.g., Bob laquidated his way through the job interview to get hired.

submitted by Jason Thompson - (www)

lar - A non-gender-specific pronoun, replacing both "his" and "her;" especially useful to avoid having to say "his/her."

e.g., "Everyone should open lar book to page seven." "Maggie was starting to doze off when Fred touched lar shoulder to wake lar up."

submitted by Jo Ginsberg

lar - Prevaricator; teller of falsehoods. (Can we get a photo of an ex-President in here?) (Which one?)

e.g., Politicians from the South generally call their opponents lars; they're all lars. (To call a politician a lar is clearly redundant.)

submitted by Blue Hornet

larapin - Cowboy slang for great food, usually home-cooked.

e.g., Erle, this BBQ chicken is downright larapin.

submitted by Ken Price from Montana

larb - To butter excessively.

e.g., If you're making me toast, please don't larb it like you did last time.

submitted by Louise Van Hine - (www)

larcen - (LAHR-sen; v.) 1. To steal: specifically, as in the old common law, "to take and carry away the personal property of another with intent to deprive the owner permanently of possession thereof." (n.) 2. One who indulges in larceny, a thief. [Back formation from "larceny."]

e.g., There used to be several types of larceny---plain larceny, larceny by trick, and embezzlement. A larcen had a smorgasbord of approaches available. A burglar or a robber had no such variety. Robbery was larceny accomplished through force or fear. Burglary was "to break and enter into the dwelling house of another at night for the purpose of committing a felony therein." So it was "rob," "burgle," and "larcen" in the old days. The old definitions no long apply. Nowadays, it's all just "theft," and no archaically poetic list of defining elements.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lardicious - Something containing, or having vast quantities of lard.

e.g., Edmond, that man is absolutley lardicious. He should lay of the crisco if you know what I'm saying.

submitted by Alex

large - One thousand, particularly dollars.

e.g., That shipment of Beanie Babies will cost you forty large.

submitted by dave

laripin - A favorable description of food: delicious, yummy, tasty. Laripin', lariping.

(ED. The phrase "larruping good" rings a bell, but I'm not sure which might be the most common of several spellings: larapin, larapin', laraping, etc. So, I'll defer to Evan Morris (The Word Detective), who says "larruping" is the one. Do You Speak American also has an extensive entry, as does Polk County (Georgia) Chat.)

e.g., Man, that steak cooked over the open campfire was laripin.

submitted by Don C. Duckering - (www)

larkhead - Stupid, idiot, fool.

e.g., Larkhead, GET!

submitted by madhuri

larp - An abbreviation meaning Live Action Role Playing, also used as a noun to refer to the activity itself.

e.g., We were at the LARP until almost 3 AM last Saturday.

submitted by RC

larrogant - An arrogant larrakin.

e.g., Macka's get's a bit boisterous when he's drunk...turns into a bit of a larrogant.

submitted by phil wild

larry - Left turn.

e.g., Hey, the party's up here. Hang a Larry into that parking lot.

submitted by JohnnyG

lart - Lamer Attitude (Re)adjustment Tool, anything from a wooden bat to a low electrical current.

e.g., If you don't stop tripping my sister, I'll beat you with my LART.

submitted by Stephen Free - (www)

lase - Poorly formed stem of the acronnym LASER. Meaning "to exhibit the qualities of laser light." Of US origin.

e.g., If we put the giggleplex in with the space bats, the hyper-crystal starts to lase.

submitted by Coofer Cat - (www)

laser it - Hurry up!

e.g., If you dont laser it, stoop, we won't make it to the party.

submitted by jill michel

last in space - The end of Man's sojourn on Earth, gone to healthier times and spaces.

e.g., He or she who is last in space, be sure to activate all the reterriform units.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

last nerve - What you "get on" of your teacher, parent, boss, or other authority figure when you're being a juvenile pest.

e.g., Mrs. Brock lowered her horn-rimmed glasses on her snout, peered over the top and wryly snapped, "Steve, you are about to get on my last nerve."

submitted by steve zihlavsky

last rights - The final appeal before the death penalty is carried out.

e.g., Soon after her last rights are exercised, last rites are administered to murderers.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

last wrongs - Erroneous sacrament.

e.g., A priest giving Last Rites to non-Catholics is actually giving Last Wrongs.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lastard - Those people who leave a tiny bit of milk in the bag just to annoy you and make you fill it up again. Lactose+bastard.

e.g., Where'd all the milk go? I bet it was Bill, that lastard.

submitted by Ian Macdonald

lastday - Used by my grandson instead of yesterday as he seem to understand that concept better.

e.g., I went swimming lastday. Can I go again today?

submitted by Julia Pate

lastel - To describe something that will last a long time, or a sport participant with no talent.

e.g., 1. Don't sweat it. That thing's lastel. 2. He'll never make it, he's way too lastel.

submitted by DrewT

lasterday - Coined by my daughter Jamie at age 3. Means somewhere between last week and yesterday. See lastertimeago. (ED. Or, more generally, any day before today -- but usually two or more days ago.)

e.g., Can we go to Chuckie Cheese like we did lasterday? | Some idiot set up a robot lasterday that spams the pd. Rather than delete this trash one entry at a time, I'm going to find a way to make use of at least some of it. Maybe for some Australish-ish.

submitted by chris gifuni

lastertimeago - My daughter, Sarah, made this up when she was about 2-1/2. She couldn't seem to get "last time" or "a long time ago" or "yesterday" so she created this awesome word.

e.g., Do you remember lastertimeago when we saw Grandma?

submitted by Sam Chapman

lasvaygan - (las-vaygen) noun - someone who has won money in Las Vegas; someone who has been successful in Las Vegas.

e.g., I have always heard stories of lasvaygans, and they encourage me to try my own luck in Las Vegas.

submitted by Miss McCann

late - See you later. Usually reserved for bro's and surfer-types.

e.g., I'll be by in the morning to pick up my board--late!

submitted by Margaret

late o'clockers - Those who are perpetually late -- to the point that if they arrived anywhere on time, it would shock everyone.

e.g., Simon is at the top of my list as a late o'clocker. I told him to be here at seven o'clock. It's seven forty-five, and he still hasn't shown up

submitted by Paul

lateover - (n.) a children's social event, like a sleepover, but when the children are really too young to be staying over at someone else's house---so they get to play until they're practically asleep standing up, and then they go home.

e.g., "They want to have a sleepover?! But they're only four!" "So let'em have a lateover. They can stay until 11 or so, and then I'll bring him home."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

laterosexual - One who always makes love in a sideways position.

e.g., He found that her laterosexual demands were anatomically impossible for him to meet.

submitted by Steve McDonald

laters - An English farewell term.

e.g., I'm going, laters.

submitted by kandy korner

latin lover - Someone or something that you love in a cute, kinda fake way (does not have to have Latin roots).

e.g., I know. He's awesome. He's my latin lover.

submitted by Cassie

latrine - (Pronounced LAY-trine (rhymes with BAY-brine) or LAH-treen (rhymes with STRAW-green); adj.) 1. Of or pertaining to latrines; 2. Of or pertaining to toilets or sewers; 3. Rather more disgustingly, of or pertaining to the flushable contents of toilets and sewage in general. [A resyllabification of_latrine_.]

e.g., "We think he dumped the crack down the toilet, Sarge." "Yeah, but he didn't flush it." "Bleh. You mean it's mixed in with the ... with that?" "Yup. I guess we'll have to ... um ... bag it for the lab." "Bleh! CSI's not gonna be happy with a bag of poopy water." "Don't tell'em that: tell them it's ... latrine evidence." | "Mr. Mayor: next year's capital expenditures must be augmented for the sewer system." "Ah, yes, the latrine concerns of municipal government." | "So he's just out of OCS?" "Well, sorta: he's out as a 3rd Lieutenant." "Why is he making us clean the toilets again?" "I don't know, maybe we should call him the latrine lieutenant."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

latron - Lateron. Used when parting ways.

e.g., Catcha latron, Mary.

submitted by Stephen

latron dutrex - "Later on, dude." Plural, Dutreces.

e.g., "See you later." "Latron, Dutrex."

submitted by saladin

latte - Later.

e.g., I gotta go, I'll see you latte.

submitted by Baggyjeans

laughs - Hilariously funny.

e.g., That movie was laughs.

submitted by BigAssFries

laundry balls - Touted as an earth-friendly alternative to clothes washing detgergents, laundry balls could be little more than an expensive hoax. How good can they be if multi-level marketer Amway wasn't willing to sell them? (ED. The things you run across when you're looking for the origin of phrases such as balls out and balls against the wall.)

e.g., "What do you know about those plastic ion laundry balls that supposedly replace detergent?" Cecil Adams was not kind in his answer . . . 11 years ago. Sellers have been taken to task by state consumer protection agencies -- one of which determined that the laundry balls contained dyed water. That would hardly be space age technology, would it?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

laundry event horizon - The state after which there is no longer any way to avoid doing laundry.

e.g., Jockeys are already inside out, t-shirt backwards and inside out, laundry pile has crept out into the hallway. I've just passed the Laundry Event Horizon.

submitted by Geo - (www)

laurelandhardyannual - A plant that is amusingly unfortunate, yet enduring. Once planted, it attempts to grow every year.

e.g., My laurelandhardyannuals always produce such a pathetic show of colour, but they never quite seem to give up and die off.

submitted by Hooty McBob

laurencesque - Relating to long, black, Renaissance dresses.

e.g., Your laurencesque attire remind me of the Renaissance Faire.

submitted by Judith A.

lavote - To ignore someone in a rude manner.

e.g., Just lavote him and he'll leave you alone.

submitted by amillia

laweba - Lack of Ambition With Extra Bad Attitude.

e.g., That Chris ain't right, she's suffering from laweba.

submitted by Kingtool - (www)

lawki - Life As We Know It.

e.g., Are hydrocarbons a requirement of LAWKI, or could such life be silicon-based?

submitted by David Kraut

lawn guy land - Landscaper's heaven.

e.g., Lawn Guy Land is where we have more landscapers than residents (and most are undocumented illegal aliens).

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lawnatic - A person who devotes an insane amount of time, money, or other resources to the appearance of his or her lawn.

e.g., Yeah, the lake is completely grown over with algae because of all the lawnatics in the subdivision up the hill.

submitted by Hal Colombo

lawnin' - When you mow the grass.

e.g., Dad, that looks like great lawnin' you're doing.

submitted by Anna - (www)

lawnmoaner - Someone who constantly complains while mowing the lawn.

e.g., She could have finished mowing the lawn by now if she wasn't complaining and dragging her heels. She's a lawnmoaner.

submitted by duncan

lawrph - Somewhere between a laugh and a harrumph, but definitely not a guffaw or a chortle.

e.g., Daryl's whit was dry, somewhat acerbic and a tad sarcastic, so it was with subtle irony that I wryly lawrphed at his jokes.

submitted by Dylon Whyte - (www)

laws - Religious term.

e.g., Laws a mussy. Despite having been caught prevaricating, he continued to varicate.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

laws of irony - Laws so solid they almost rank up there with Newton's Law of Gravity in infalliblity. Though plural, the laws of irony dictate one point -- that whoever is cocky about something or some situation will soon be humiliated in some way relating to pride.

e.g., I saw the laws of irony at work yesterday when Chris bragged about her gracefulness and then tripped over a chair and fell down the stairs.

submitted by Firestorm

lawsweet - A lawsuit the one suing hopes will result in a sweet payoff for her. Multiple lawsuits filed concurrently would be lawsuites.

e.g.,

Marty: What do you think the chances are that Thomas Eric Duncan's
family will file a lawsweet against the Dallas hospital he died in?

Mac: Who's Thomas -- what? Eric? -- Duncan?

Marty: The Liberian national who came to the U.S. from Africa carrying the
Ebola virus.

Mac: Riiight. With Jesse Jackson on the scene to charge racism? I'd say 100%.

Lillith: You think the hospital's staff is racist?

Mac: Doesn't matter. The hospital turned away a guy who was deathly ill and sent him home. The lawsweet will be for malpractice. I've had enough experience with doctors, nurses, hospitals, and nursing homes to know how many mistakes get made. Way, way too many.

Lillith: They'd have a better chance of winning a jackpot payoff if their lawsweet was anywhere else but Texas.

Marty & Mac, at the same time: Tru dat.

Mac: Jinx, you owe me a coke.

submitted by lawsuite - (www)

lawt - Bye, see you later, etc.--especially when making a hasty retreat. Rhymes with fought.

e.g., "Hey, do you remember that party Eric threw last year?" "Oh yeah, that was the one I woke up afterwards next to your sis...lawt!"

submitted by jenna

lax - Lacrosse.

e.g., "Ignacio Adriasola, an art history graduate student, had a sign taped to his shirt: 'It isn't what Duke has, but what it lax,' using the shorthand word for lacrosse." (News & Observer.)

submitted by HD Fowler

lax - To relax, kick back, chill out.

e.g., I'm gonna go and lax for a while.

submitted by Scarlett

lax - A hillbilly expression of enjoyment.

e.g., Ah shure lax these wurds.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

laxadated - Relaxed, laid back, lazy.

e.g., I'm so laxadated I can't even bother to punctuate this sentence properly. I hope the editor does it for me.

submitted by Barbara T

lay der hosen - In Penn-Sylvania Dutch country, it's how they stretch out the waterhosen ein fire outten to make.

e.g., First you lay der hosen, then you squirt the flames you've chosen.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lay down the law - Take control of a situation, occasionally through use of physical force.

e.g., Back in high school, whenever a fight broke out, the principal would show up and lay down the law.

submitted by ditnis

lay-level - (adj.) Written for the laity, that is, the ordinary person, rather than containing profession-specific jargon such as legalese or medi-speak.

e.g., "I can't understand this document at all. Can anyone here read Engineer-lingo?" "Oh, no need, sir: we've prepared a lay-level copy...it IS a bit longer, though." "Oh, good, I think."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

layer 8 - The OSI Networking model goes to Layer 7, application, the program the end user is running. Layer 8, the next layer, is the end user. This commonly refers to an end user not knowing what she is doing.

e.g., His computer is experiencing a Layer 8 issue.

submitted by Ross Towbin - (www)

lazearchy - A system of government whereby the world ruled by laziness.

e.g., World peace would be easy in a lazearchy; everybody would be too lazy to fight. The solution to all our problems lies in laziness, as long as we're too lazy to look for it anywhere else.

submitted by Sam G

lazy ketchup - The ketchup in restaurants that is hesitant to leave its bottle.

e.g., I'd have returned from my lunch break sooner, if it weren't for that lazy ketchup.

submitted by Harold R. McPhillips

lazy-man load - A load that is too heavy and large for the carrier to bear, mostly made so that the carrier can make fewer trips.

e.g., Jeanette said in fear, "Mike, put some of those cases back. It's dangerous to carry a lazy-man load down stairs."

submitted by Ian Faynik

lbd - Lesbian By Default. A physically unattractive woman with no other options than lesbianism.

e.g., She hasn't had a date in a while. I'm thinking she'll be LBD by New Year's Eve.

submitted by ADB

lbm - Little Bitch Man. Used to describe a particularly meek and sheepish male.

e.g., Watch yourself LBM. You're about to enter a world of hurt.

submitted by needfortweed

lbst - A hairstyle, long in back short on top. Aka mullet.

e.g., That guy has the longest LBST I've ever seen. He's cooler than Billy Ray Cyrus.

submitted by Heidi Groth

lcf - Looking Cool Factor.

e.g., What the hell did you do that for? It's all about the LCF.

submitted by Neonnoir

lead argument - Gunfight.

e.g., The poker players got into a lead argument.

submitted by Deacon

lead sled - Hot rod slang. In the days of yore, body work was done with lead, instead of the plastic body filler that is used today. Highly modified cars had to use a ton of lead, on top of the already excessive weight.

e.g., That '50 Merc' is all done up -- chopped, channeled, frenched -- hell of a nice Lead Sled.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

leaf blower - A "leaf blower" holds a noisy gasoline-engine-based material movement system in his hand, and the philosophic position that "As soon as the leaves are not in my yard, they no longer exist" in his head.

e.g., Josh is the biggest leaf blower in our office. As soon as a request hits his desk, he figures out how to make it somebody else's problem. Then he plays video games until he nods off.

submitted by Mark Near

leafity - (LEEF-it-ee; n.) 1. The quality or state of a plant or tree's being covered with leaves; by extension, 2. a. summer: that time of year characterized by the presence of leaves on deciduous plants and trees, also b. spring: that time of year characterized by the appearance of new leaves. 2. c. autumn: that time of year characterized by carpets and piles of dead leaves everywhere.

e.g., Shade is the result of a tree's healthy leafity. | Leafity is so hot that one must seek shade in order to avoid dehydration. | After a long winter, one must rejoice in leafity.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

leake - Take a leak in a lake and you have a leake.

e.g., Lake Superior just became Leake Superior, Sam.

submitted by HD Fowler

leaker - A person who is incompetent. Someone who always seems to make mistakes. A loser.

e.g., That Chris ... what a leaker. He can never do anything right.

submitted by Rick Kridler

lean - A synonym for the word "cool," used by hipsters in the Ottawa area.

e.g., Rich: You see that 70s rock revival band at Stuggy's last night? Paul: Yeah, they were lean.

submitted by natmac

leanable - That which can be leaned on.

e.g., The back of this sofa is so leanable.

submitted by Gav

leanular - To lean in a funny way, to the point of being ridiculous.

e.g., 1. That house is all leanular. 2. He hit the chimney with the 1956 Studebacker, so now it's all leanular.

submitted by Peter Bonzani Jr.

learify - (Rhymes with HERE-if-pie; v.) (1.) To reduce somebody to abject penury and hopelessness in one fell swoop, especially someone who had been wealthy, important, or celebrated (or thought themselves to be wealthy, important, or celebrated), especially where the person (um) abjected relied upon your support; (2.) To betray the trust of one's parent(s), siblings, other family members, friends, partners, vel cet., resulting in severe (sometimes catastrophic) consequences; (3.) To renege on an agreement, promise, or contract, again, especially where the breach causes serious repercussions for the nonbreaching party; (4.) To flatter (sometimes obsequiously), only to later turn against a somebody you've fooled (oftentimes a pompous flattery-monger (but hey, treachery is treachery)). [From Shakespeare's King Lear, who demanded that his three daughters (Goneril, Regan, and Cordelia) to profess undying love and obedience to him before officially granting them the three portions of his kingdom.] (cf. "Gonerillify," "Reganate," and "Cordeal.")

e.g., Ricole strung Max along, telling him that she loved him, enough (so she implied) to marry him after graduation. Max had been badly disfigured when he was a child, so we all thought very highly of her. But, at graduation, she admitted it was all a joke that she and her friends had concocted during the previous holidays and that she wanted nothing to do with a "cripple," none of us could believe anyone could be so cruel. We had to put poor Max under suicide watch, and we got his money back on the $10K diamond ring before he could throw it in the river. And Ricole, the filthy little Learifying harridan---and her high-school friends: all the popular girls---they ended up leaving town.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

learjet lefties - Politically liberal rich persons who criticise the capitalist system that they themselves exploit to accumulate their wealth.

e.g., Did you hear how those Learjet lefties Ted Turner and Bono who want to write off Third World debt?

submitted by Tim Hickey

learnagogy - The art of learning, or the process of learning. Of course we have words and phrases that are similar such as cognition, learning theory, study habits, study skills and learning strategy, but if Malcolm Knowles can popularize the term "andragogy," then why can't I keep going with a related word that speaks to the responsibility for the learning process to belong to the individual who is seeking and retaining the knowledge? If andragogy is offered as an alternative to pedagogy, then why can't "learnagogy"be offered as an alternative as well? As far as I'm concerned, we don't have enough words to describe this process. So I hereby on, and from this day forward, will refer to the art and joy of learning by using the term learnagogy.

e.g., The young programmer was pleased with his learnagogy, so he composed a blog entry describing how he mastered the process on his own.

submitted by Sandy Mills-Alford - (www)

learning computers - College students who do nothing but learn, i.e.. are only concerned with getting a good job. They don't have any fun. Northwestern students are a good example of this. It's also a good thing to yell out the window at people. It comes from _Terminator 2_. Arnold says it in the movie.

e.g., B: These guys don't do anything for fun. E: Yeah, what a bunch of learning computers.

submitted by Chewbaccalypse

leather hat band - Emphasizing extremly snug fitting garments.

e.g., I think I've put on weight--this shirt is tighter than a leather hat band.

submitted by Vince Edward Estepp

leathered - Drunk, stoned.

e.g., I have been in the pub all day. I'm leathered.

submitted by Kim

leatherette - A biker chick.

e.g., I saw a biker with a leatherette on the back of his bike.

submitted by Kristen - (www)

leaverright - Anything found that is worthless.

e.g., I picked up this worthless rock and decided to leaverright where I found it.

submitted by tim mcilwraith

lebowski - Synonym for the ultimate slacker. From the slacker protagonist in the Coen Brothers film _The Great Lebowski_.

e.g., I was going to take the summer job, but I decided to do a lebowski instead.

submitted by Joel Parker

leck - To strain the upper spine and neck upwards in order to howl at the full moon.

e.g., TJ found the woods and their environs rather disconcerting, and released all the pent up pressure by lecking in the manner of a wolf and howling at the Moon

submitted by Miles Gavin

lectursize - An exposition of a given topic combined with a hands on exercise and presented to an audience or class.

e.g., The lecturcize on typography would have been more effective if we'd been asked to compare semi-sans serif faces in additon to the sans serif.

submitted by John Upchurch

led head - A Led Zeppelin enthusiast.

e.g., That goofball's listened to "In My Time of Dying" four times in a row. Clearly a led head.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lede - Journalist slang for "lead" -- i.e., the first sentence of a news story.

e.g., The lede is nice, but by the third graf things start to slow down. From Ken Layne's warblog.

submitted by Slithy Tove - (www)

ledge - Short for legend

e.g., Commentator, "He shoots, he scores. He's a living ledge."

submitted by darrell milton

ledgerdeheel - "Light-heeled pranks. . . . A play on the word legerdemain, which literally means 'light of hand,' used to refer to sleight of hand or trickery and deception. In the citation above, legerdeheel refers specifically to infidelity, not a laughing matter. Except for the times that it is.  
 
"If being light of hands is prestidigitation, then being light of heel must be prestipeditation. Perhaps meaning that you can sneak off somewhere else without being noticed, as if by magic. Or maybe it means you can do card tricks with your feet."

e.g., If you have your wits about you, you won't let her get away with half of what you've accumulated during your marriage. While you practiced medicine, Chris practiced ledgerdeheels. And, here in Texas, that's enough to keep her from getting her mitts on your stuff.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

leditor - A letter to the editor.

e.g., I was so angered by the news article, I dashed off a scathing missive to the Times. Now ilet's see if they'll publish my leditor.

submitted by natalie - (www)

lee marvin, marvin - Starvin'--only related when you're very hungry for food.

e.g., I'm Lee Marvin, gotta get me some food.

submitted by Gav

leech - Someone who does little or no work, yet claims responsibility for the final product. To do little or no work and claim responsibility for the final product.

e.g., That leech stole my science grade. OR That guy leeched an A off me.

submitted by Scott

leeismic - Following all the religions at once.

e.g., D'you think Lee's leeismic.

submitted by leeleebigc

leet - Internet slang for elite

e.g., That's a leet toaster you got.

submitted by Aaron Wilde

leetspeak - Internet shorthand language. It came to be the hacker term for a collection of "emoticons," phonetic shortcuts, acronyms and abbreviations. When IRCchat and eventually AOL Instant Messenger came to dominate teen life (as well as cellphone text messaging in Europe and Asia), l33tspeak gradually became (and is becoming) a staple of teen vernacular. L33Tspeak (abreviation leet) comes from "l33t hax0r," a common term from the early days of the phenomenon when this practice was mostly employed by hackers on slow, multi-user Unix systems -- and each keystroke was precious. A "l33t hax0r" is an "elite hacker." "R U wurEd dat d eng lngwij wil bcum cor^ted unrEdabl?" translated becomes "Are you worried that the english language will become corrupted and unreadable?"

e.g., The PseudoDictionary seldom accepts leetspeak entries … partly because such entries are unreadable and unintelligible to our geezer editors. Nota bene: All of our editors are geezers. If not now, later.

submitted by Teri

left - Not right. Mentally off balance.

e.g., Fowler: Chris is left. Jim: No, he's right over there, playing pool. See? Fowler: I mean he's not right mentally.

submitted by HD Fowler

left - To become extremely dissappointed, upset, or angry with someone or about something. As in to be the opposite of "right."

e.g., You wrecked Sarah's car. She's gonna go left.

submitted by Brian Thompson

left-handed - Doing something in a strange way.

e.g., I figured out a left-handed way of fixing my CD player. I bought another one just like it at the store, then put my broken one in the box and returned it the next day. (We've all done it, but we're not proud of it.)

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

left-handed screwdriver - A thing we used to make freshmen go down and ask for from the machine shop to test their stupidity. Used now to describe a new product that performs the same basic function as the old product, but has a useless marketing feature.

e.g., Wow, the new Ziploc bags have a yellow and blue zip stripe . . . sounds like nothing more than a left-handed screwdriver. (Well actually, there is a function: the stripe turns green so you can tell the bag is sealed. Not a biggie, but it's useful.)

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

leftahydagonal - The direction behind you to the left.

e.g., The ladder was leftagydagonal to his position in the room.

submitted by Jared - (www)

lefter - Farther to the left.

e.g., The bank is lefter than the grocery store.

submitted by Katie

lefticate - Indicate left. Righticate, too.

e.g., Lefticate and turn left at the next traffic light.

submitted by Osher Goldman

leftoveritis - The condition of being tired of eating leftovers. Usually occurs around major holidays, such as Thanksgiving (in US) and Christmas.

e.g., Hal: What's to eat tonight, dear? Sal: Turkey tetrazinni. Yum? Hal: Aaaaaaaargh! No! Sal: Sounds like leftoveritis to me. Don't worry. We'll go to 3rd Street Pizza instead.

submitted by Paul

leftunder - A leftover of a dish made from roadkill

e.g., Mmmmmm-mmmm, Aunt B., these possum leftunders is somethin' special.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

leg fingers - Toes.

e.g., Grab my slippers, would you? My leg fingers are colder than a mofo.

submitted by Lord Highbrow of Arachnopod

leg of yam - Any food or drink that would be acceptable to a vegetarian or vegan. Sounds good, tastes good, and has nothing to do with the consumption of poor dead animals. (Yam, in this instance, has nothing to do with a ground vegetable; it is a modification of the Latin American pronunciation of llama: leg of llama would also be an unlikely thing to eat.)

e.g., I'd rather die than eat a pig or chew on a cow. It's got to be leg of yam, which can be prepared in many delicious ways. Eating meat is barbaric and cruel, not to say possibly unhealthy and very hard on the pocket book. Man is designed to eat tasty vegetation of many sorts, not the bloody flesh of murdered creatures. Eat right, act right, feel right, do right.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

leg-end - Someone who believes in her own legendary status, but for all intents and purposes is a dimwit.

e.g., A: I heard Chris slept with two supermodels last night. B: Lies. That leg-end couldn't make it with a circus midget.

submitted by wnpxnff

legaleyes - To see the meaning of a legal matter.

e.g., He was able to legaleyes the contract on the cell phone.

submitted by Jim

legalez - All galez following the strict regulations of the Free Galez Foundation (FGF). See also http://n.ethz.ch/student/simonrei/galez/

e.g., Bill: Legalize the plant. Ted: Are you sure this galez is legalez?

submitted by Daniel Suttter - (www)

legger - A downpour or rainstorm that makes you run for shelter

e.g., It's a real legger out there. I'm drenched.

submitted by Jeff Jorgensen

legger - Quick getaway. From "to leg it."

e.g., I'd recommend doing a legger before the cops come, Chris. Another felony conviction and they'll put you away for life. Remember, we've got Baume's Rush laws in this states. Three felony convictions and you go in for life, no parole.

submitted by Mick - (www)

leghumper - One who tends to be "cutesy," or overly playful.

e.g., Why won't that leghumper stop making up overly cute words?

submitted by John

legions - Banner patriotic donation amount.

e.g., I pledge a legions to the flag. (Common children's misconception.)

submitted by S., Berliner, III - (www)

legitly - Shorter form of "legitimately." Meaning correct, real, actual, true. Legitely.

e.g., That was a legitly good excuse.

submitted by katie

legitmatic - Existing independent of doubt or debate.

e.g., He suggested I kill her, but it wasn't a legitmatic option.

submitted by Lance

legless - In response to an Aussie's saying she was "tanked" and "legless." Quite simply, she was admitting she was slightly intoxicated, but having fun. See also: tanked.

e.g., Maaaaaaaaaate, I'm legless, hey.

submitted by Damien

legoides - (lay-GOI-deez; n.) Something made of legos or lego clones. (Adjectival form "legoidean": made of legos vel cet.) [

e.g., I've seen some really amazing legoides in my time, but a legoidean model of the Hindenburg disaster has got to win a monument or something.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

legtronix - A specialized application of electronics, in this case toward the use and construction of the artifical leg, and by extension to all the other artificial appendages, human, robotic, android, extraterrestrial.

e.g., Through the specialized science of legtronix, we now have lame who walk, hands that talk, feet that rock.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

leibniz - To come up with an idea or invention that already exists. From Gottfried Leibniz, the man who invented calculus years after Isaac Newton.

e.g., That whole ripped pants thing? I invented it, or at least I leibnized it.

submitted by Paul Amore

leisiate - To be at leisure.

e.g., We are going to our beach house with friends to leisiate for the weekend. | This weekend we are going to leisiate for a while and then do some food shopping. | Best vacation ever. We got on the cruise and spent the next seven days leisiating to our hearts content. | The resort provides everything you would need to leisiate for days on end

submitted by Jason Lepsis - (www)

lekker - Good, positive, cool, sweet, phat.

e.g., That Corvette is a lekker car. (This is actually an Afrikaans word which means the above. Many South Africans use it in English conversations.)

submitted by Paul Hickernell

lemahaf - Southern-fried urbonics for "eleven-and-a-half."

e.g., Hey, I been shorted. My carton of aigs only has lemahaf.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

leman - Old Scots for "lover."

e.g., She said he was her leman back in Glasgow.

submitted by Bruce Jewett

lembas - From "The Lord of the Rings." Elven way bread known for its ability to feed a person for a day with one piece. I use it to describe any overly dense, heavy, or stodgey baked good.

e.g., I think I will pass on your mom's Christmas lembas this year.

submitted by Patrick

lemming - Blindly or heedlessly repeating the actions or words of another.

e.g., As a result of consuming a six-pack of beer each and lemming a Monday night broadcast of wrestling, Eddie, Dwayne, Jerry, and Harold all ended up in the emergency room's trauma unit.

submitted by Lisa

lemming juice - Like lemon juice except it comes from lemmings. A new product to help the lemming population stay managably non-suicidal.

e.g., Is that freshly squeezed lemming juice in the lemmingade or bottled?

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lemmingly - Acting like a lemming, or "acting before thinking."

e.g., I lemmingly wrapped my car around a telephone pole.

submitted by Minkus

lemon - Used to describe any fanwork which is written solely to describe various sexual activities. Noted for their use of extreme hyperbole and atrocious grammar and spelling.

e.g., Glad Mom wasn't in the room when I was reading that lemon; otherwise, she'd never let me on the internet again.

submitted by keyla

lemon curry - Said out of nowhere as a response to something else, seemingly out of nowhere.

e.g., Frick: Credit card. Frack: Lemon curry.

submitted by BigAssFries

lemon shimmae, kiwi schnazz - Usually used together, describing two really hot cute amazing godess girls.

e.g., Hey, Matt, look over to the left. Kiwi ShnazZ and Lemon Shimmae headed our way!"

submitted by Katie smit

lempcke - Doing something stupid for a tiny reward or no reward at all. A person doing a stupid act.

e.g., A. I'll give you a nickel to suck my toe. B. No, I'm not doing a lempcke. OR Hey, that's a good stunt for a reality-based TV show. You could make a fool of yourself in front of millions. Then everyone would know what a lempcke you are.

submitted by DeBuG

leng - To snack or munch.

e.g., All you did all day was watch TV and leng.

submitted by aldwin oliveros

lengthly - Common mispronouciation of "lengthy" or "lengthily."

e.g., I was bored out of my head during that lengthly meeting.

submitted by chris gifuni

lennon moment - Describing a reaction to a situation, be it violent, creative, etc.

e.g., He said something that was so stupid I had to get him back with something that would make him cry. It was a real Lennon moment.

submitted by Nefret

lennonite - One who follows John Lennon and many of his beliefs. Superior to being simply a fan.

e.g., Not only does Brad own every Lennon album, he wrote the President and told him to give peace a chance. He's such a Lennonite.

submitted by Tara DellaFranzia - (www)

leo - Lower Earth Orbit. When someone blows her top, she is said to go LEO.

e.g., When I told Bob I'd kissed his girl, he went LEO.

submitted by qnarf

leohemerism - (lee-oh-HEE-mer-iz-m; n.) 1. The belief that not getting what one prays for proves that God does not exist; 2. By extension, the belief that God's nonsusceptibility to experimental proof demonstrates his nonexistence (although I can't prove by experimentation that my sister exists, since she doesn't hold still long enough for me to show her to anybody). (From the Greek λεον ήμερης [leon hemeres] "tame lion": from C.S. Lewis's analogy of people thinking of God as a tame lion who performs upon command, and then cease to believe in him at all when he doesn't do as we ask (demand).) "Leohemerist"---a person who believes in leohemerism; "Leohemic" or "Leohemeric"---of or pertaining to leohemerism or leohemerists.

e.g., "I asked God over and over to cure George's cancer, but he didn't do it." "I once asked my history professor to tell me the answers to a midterm, but he wouldn't do it either." "Isn't George a little more important than a stupid midterm?!---Why wouldn't God save George? He either won't, which is mean, or he can't, which means he's not God." "That's illogical ... it's leohemerism: should I stop believing in my history teacher?"

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lepercon - A con which relies on a pseudoleper playing a key role. From the TV series Monk, episode "Mr Monk and the Leper."

e.g., The lepercon case was so full of holes it could have been solved by GroovyLady.

submitted by HD Fowler

lepine - Characteristic of or resembling a rabbit. Fast or timid.

e.g., The way she was sampling at the snacks was more lepine than graceful.

submitted by Scott Stephens

leptic - Someone who posesses an extreme lack of competence at any task whatsoever.

e.g., Keith, you leptic, next time turn the saw *off* before you try to clean the blade.

submitted by Keith Hudgins

leroy - A sneeze that refuses to come out.

e.g., I was trying to answer his questions but I was stuck with leroy and I couldn't talk.

submitted by alex

lerpy - Used to describe a really tall, skinny guy who tends to look geeky and walks like Shaggy from "Scooby Doo."

e.g., That guy sure is lerpy.

submitted by Laura Centric

lerpy - Gangly and ungraceful; all legs and elbows. Especially used to describe prepubescent males at that awkward, clumsy stage where they're always bumping into stuff.

e.g., Is that little Josh? Boy, I remember him as a chubby little kid; now he's all stretched out and lerpy.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lert - A person who is very watchful all around her. Informed or perhaps nosy.

e.g., Don't tell me any secrets around Bob. He's a lert.

submitted by Henry Tagisson

les binos | binos - Variation on the word lesbian, used by our group of friends. (ED. This seems friendly enough. But what the hell do I know? I'm a geezerette, but not of the les binos variety.)

e.g., She's binos. Ah, les binos you say. | Is she binos? Yes, les binos.

submitted by Emma Carter

lesbiannoyed - What she is when a woman is angry at her boyfriend and proclaims "she wishes she were a lesbian so she wouldn't have to deal with men."

e.g., Beth was often lesbiannoyed with Todd and his buddies' "fart jokes."

submitted by Gina Yancey

lesbilly - She and her special girlfriend both live in the hills, happy and doing their own thing: they can sing, they can dance, they do a little farming and don't need no man nohow for nothin', thankee kinely.

e.g., I done see'd Bonnie and Butch, our sweet local lesbilly couple, down to the general store last evening an' gave them a invite over to the grange get together, which they duly accepted an' trotted off then to shoe their horse.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lesbionage - The practice of using lesbian agents to spy on other lesbians for data collection, etc.

e.g., The only way we can get inside that lesbian organization is through lesbionage. Ask your sister if she'll help.

submitted by #1 stunna

lesbionic - The state of being lesbian -- particularly if electronic devices are involved.

e.g., My desktop computer was being lesbionic, so I unplugged it.

submitted by Ally

lesbolshevik - (n., adj.) feminist.

e.g., Too many lesbolsheviks are occupying seats of power in Washington to suit me.

submitted by Karl Jahn - (www)

lesionable drought - A drought that's so severe that the earth is extremely dry and cracked, looking as though it might have been caused by an earthquake.

e.g., One very hot summer in the 1940s we experienced a lesionable drought so bad that we had to be careful not to fall into the cracks.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lesionnaire - Soldier in a military force that uses biological weaponry.

e.g., Everyone's coming down with smallpox. I think we've been attacked by a lesionnaire. ('Tis the season for a lesion?)

submitted by Adam Browne

leskoesque - (adj.) Of or pertaining to whimsical, yet incisive and socially relevant puns (that is, puns everyone groans at, i.e., puns everyone repeats at every opportunity. [From Charlie Lesko, a fellow contributor to the PseudoDictionary, whose punning entries always make me . . . well, laugh or wince (depending on the punning commentary's aim). I just thought such wit deserved a memorial.]

e.g., The Leskoesque puns in the PseudoDictionary could be gathered together as a book of political commentary and social satire. It'd probably do some real good in a jaded and fairly apathetic culture.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lesnerize - "It represents the ultimate fear of not knowing what it is you need to avoid doing. Well, I'm pretty confident that, whatever the cultural differences between me and the Korean administration and clientele at my new school, I'm not lesnerizing."  
 
Typical Sheckley stories include "Bad Medicine" (in which a man is mistakenly treated by a psychotherapy machine intended for Martians), "Protection" (whose protagonist is warned of deadly danger unless he avoids the common activity of "lesnerizing," a word whose meaning is not explained), and "The Accountant" (in which a family of wizards learns that their son has been taken from them by a more sinister trade -- accountancy).

e.g.,

"Whatever you do, don't Lesnerize!" |

"The trouble is, I don't have any idea what lesnerizing might be. A common human action, the derg had said. Well, for the time, I'm avoiding as many actions as possible.

"I've caught up on some back sleep and nothing happened, so that's not lesnerizing. I went out and bought food, paid for it, cooked it, ate it. That wasn't lesnerizing. I wrote this report. That wasn't lesnerizing.

"I'll come out of this yet.

"I'm going to catch a nap. I think I have a cold coming on. Now I have to sneeze.

"The End

"© 1956 by Robert Sheckley. First published in Galaxy, April 1956." |

"Well, that was an odd one. It made me think about some of the ridiculous warning labels you sometimes see. Am I to take it from the ending that lesnerizing is the same thing as sneezing?" |

"I have this peculiar fear of doing something I shouldn't be doing -- could I be lesnerizing?" "No. It's just that you're married now. Such fear is normal for a newly married man." |

"The protagonist of 'Protection' is reassured that he is safe, unless of course he dares to lesnerize, but no one will tell him what that constitutes. Here is a theme that resonates in the sf community, rich as it is in socially challenged types who never know when they'll be punished for violating unspoken rules everyone else is aware of. I myself often fear that I am about to lesnerize, or have already done so. (Another sf treatment of this theme appears in Greg Egan's Distress, whose narrator finds himself in the Kafkaesque position of being kicked out of a Relationship for two crimes, the second of which is ignorance of the first.)" |

"Contact with the derg has also opened the narrator up to other dangers. There’s the gamper, the grailers, the feegs, the leeps, which can be warded off with things like mistletoe and graveyard mold and keeping the closet door closed, but and worst of all, the thrang, which can only be eliminated if the narrator does not lesnerize. Problem is, the thrang gets the derg before it can define lesnerize, so the narrator is left alone, his actions reduced to eating and sleeping, afraid that anything more ambitious might cause his doom. It's all great fun, but it's the derg's sigh that elevates 'Protection' to something approaching tragedy; Sheckley's is a universe when even dergs are slaves to their nature and weary from the inexplicable rules of existence. A friend I showed this story to got it exactly backwards when he said, "It's good, but he’s no Douglas Adams.'" |

There'll be an airplane crash in Burma next week, but it shouldn't affect me here in New York. And the feegs certainly can't harm me. Not with all my closet doors closed.

No, the big problem is lesnerizing. I must not lesnerize. Absolutely not. As you can imagine, that hampers me.

And to top it all, I think I'm catching a really nasty cold.

The whole thing started on the evening of November seventh. I was walking down Broadway on my way to Baker's Cafeteria. On my lips was a faint smile, due to having passed a tough physics exam earlier in the day. In my pocket, jingling faintly, were five coins, three keys, and a book of matches.

Just to complete the picture, let me add that the wind was from the northwest at five miles an hour, Venus was in the ascendancy and the moon was decidedly gibbous. You can draw your own conclusions from this.

I reached the corner of 98th Street and began to cross. As I stepped off the curb, someone yelled at me, "The truck! Watch the truck!"

I jumped back, looking around wildly. There was nothing in sight. Then, a full second later, a truck cut around the corner on two wheels, ran through the red light and roared up Broadway. Without the warning, I would have been hit. |

"I couldn't really tell you what the talk was about. After all, I was pretty high, and I've never bothered to master a lot of the standard human concepts. Roughly speaking, it seemed like Jack thought he could prove that every possible universe exists. Considering my background, you'd think I'd be interested in what he might have to say on this topic . . . but you'd be wrong. I just wanted to lesnerize a couple of people and get the hell back to the Pure Land. . . . I couldn't stop myself from shlubbering out, 'I want to lesnerize you.' Why did I have to go and tip my hand like that, a part of my mind wondered bleakly. Helen had jumped to her feet, and when I slid to the floor I could see her shiny black underwear. It took the full force of my will to keep from beginning to rave in the mother tongue. . . . A 'Venusian's' mission on Earth is to reproduce by lesnerization, and then return to the Pure Land. Once enough of us have done this, there will be a web of consciousness connecting our universe and yours, and we will be able to draw the two closer together so that even the weak and diseased members of our race can move freely between 'Venus' and the Earth. Several members of my swarm have completed successful missions, and they have described to me in detail what it is like to have the sort of multiple trans-universal consciousness which Jack and Helen were puzzling out. . . . 'I can't believe this,' Jack said desperately. He ripped the top off another beer from the icebox. He'd left his first one by the werble, and he was scared to get close to me. He sat down on the kitchen chair. 'I'll watch,' he said shakily, 'But I'm not going to let you lesnerize us.' . . . I should have taken them then and there . . . but lesnerization goes a lot smoother if the human hosts are completely willing. It's a simple operation. You just run a pseudopod up the person's nose, suck out their brain, and fill their head up with part of your bodymass. Over the next year, your offspring slowly absorbs all of the host body, learning how to model it in the process. It's the way we've always reproduced on Earth. When we fission like this, we have to split off two buds . . . baby 'Venusians' . . . so we always have to lesnerize two people at once." |

"Neither of you must lesnerize for at least the first ten years of your relationship, starting form you first date; If either of you do, it will end badly in an incident involving cheese and some kind of transportation device." |

"Either way, do practice safe sex, and lesnerise at least once a day." |

"This monstah is known as a 'feeg.' It appears in a story by Robert Sheckley called 'Protection.' In the story a man sells his soul to the Devil who says he cannot collect unless the man 'lesnerizes,' but the Devil never tells the man what 'lesnerizing' is. Turns out that 'lesnerizing' is, uh, sneezing. In the story the feegs are what lurks in the closet which is why you have to keep the closet doors closed at all times." |

Lesnerizing is much less common in science fiction and fantasy, than everyday life. While some characters have adverse reactions to magic, truth drugs, or dishwashing detergent with lemon, most characters never seem to suffer from food allergies, allergies to cats or wool or other animals or animal fibers, or exposure to poison ivy or other often-adverse-reaction-causing plants. When writers include allergies, why are they doing it -- how much of it is to make the character seem more 'real,' how much is for some particular plot effect in the story, where the character's sneezing is important, or the wizard melts away with a bucket of detergent dumped on him? Do readers appreciate it, not appreciate it, or not care when characters' weaknesses include allergies?" |

"There is also the unlucky sneeze. . . . I had forgotten about the sneeze. . . . the protagonist (who is also the narrator) is warned not to lesnerize." |

"All I can say is nobody better sneeze around here or all hell will break loose. . . . Kip, of course, will take seriously the warning not to lesnerize." |

submitted by [Robert Sheckley]

lesqueet - "Let's go eat."

e.g., Are you ready? Then Lesqueet.

submitted by Kevin Elliott

lessedmit - An extremely intelligent person.

e.g., He was a lessedmit. No, of course I'm not talking about "Juan."

submitted by Juan Bastoole

lessoff - A term more fitting to replace the word "moron," which sounds too positive (more + on) to describe accurately the person you're referring to.

e.g., If'n there weren't so many lessoffs on the road, we might be able to make the movie on time.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

let gunch - Get lunch.

e.g., I'm hungry. Shall we let gunch?

submitted by Juice Maloose

let some air out of - Stab, stabbed. Several years ago I was talking with a middle-aged black guy in a pool hall. When he mentioned that he had just got out of prison, I asked him what he was in for. He said, "Some cracker was gittin' in my bidness, so I decided to let some air out of him." Since I was the only white guy in the room, I decided it might be better for my health if I found another place to spend my time.

e.g., Keep your smart aleck pie hole shut this time, Reggie. You open your yap again and someone's gonna let some air out of you.

submitted by HD Fowler

let the smoke out - To make something smoke by accident, usually damaging it. Most often used when in reference to electronics or automotive work.

e.g., If you install your own sound system without following the directions, there's a good chance you'll let the smoke out.

submitted by Tristan

lete - A. An Athlete. B. Someone from an elite class.

e.g., The letes are in the gym right now, so we can't use it.

submitted by Quigs

letheft - Legalized theft.

e.g., In over half the cases, marriage can be said to be letheft.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler