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headuparse - A newly discovered disease imported from the UK. Symptoms include an inability to see where one is going, a severe lack of peripheral vision, severe pain when sitting, and the random offering of crow bars by strangers.

e.g., Those afflicted with headuparse should seek the guidance of those who have been cured by seeing their own ironic tendencies.

submitted by paige_archer

headupbuttitis - The condition of somone who is extremely clueless.

e.g., Chris has his usual bad case of headupbuttitis.

submitted by Jana Coley

headwaggle - Head waggle.

e.g., "To perform the headwaggle, keep your shoulders perfectly still, hold your face completely expressionless, and tilt your head side-to-side, metronome style. Make it smooth -- like you're a bobble-head doll. It's not easy. Believe me, I've been practicing."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

heady stuff - "Apt to affect the head; intoxicating; strong." Mostly intoxicating stuff to me, about the only use of heady I've heard run across: "Willful; rash; precipitate; hurried on by will or passion; ungovernable. | Apt to affect the head; intoxicating; strong. | Violent; impetuous."

e.g., Short enough still to be hidden by the shelves stocked with tools and the other goods you find in a hardware store, hearing the oldtimers' talk of a man and a woman engaged in sexual congress being killed with a single bullet was heady stuff for a 12-year-old.

submitted by HD Fowler

health and safety meeting - Smoke break, returning smoker to a calm, rational, happy person thus ensuring health and safety for co-workers and others sharing space with the smoker

e.g., I think it's time we went for a health and safety meeting.

submitted by Zoe

health-care - I've tired of trying to determine which form to use, based on whether I'm dealing with an adjectival or noun usage. Therefore, I hereby designate the hyphenated form «health-care» to be Machiavellean Standard 67, to be used in place of «health care» and «healthcare» in all instances. health care also health·care (helth'kâr') n. The prevention, treatment, and management of illness and the preservation of mental and physical well-being through the services offered by the medical and allied health professions. adj. also health-care (helth'kâr') Of or relating to health care: the health care industry.

e.g., My life would be so much better if the so-called health-care professionals were always up to the designation professional. At military academies, the student who finishes at the bottom of the class is called the goat. Do you know what the student who finishes last in her medical school class is called? Doctor.

submitted by HD Fowler

heart - When you can't draw a heart on a piece of paper use the word heart instead.

e.g., I heart that movie--it's my favorite.

submitted by Kimberly

heart terrorist - A heart terrorist is someone who repeatedly breaks other peoples' hearts and feels no guilt whatsoever about it.

e.g., He was a serial heartbreaker, going from partner to partner without a thought for their feelings -- a real heart terrorist, in other words.

submitted by Jason Jones

heart thiefs - Grandchildren, especially granddaughters if you're a man. Daughters are heart thiefs, too.

e.g., "Wow, same age as my granddaughter and she, too, is a heart thief. Had my second granddaughter last Thursday morn. Grandbabies change things don't they, guns? I never imagined what it would be like. Now I know, almost can't explain the feeling." | My soon-to-be 19-year-old granddaughter remains a heart thief. If they're brought up right, it can happen. | Having taken care of him five days a week for his first five-and-a-half years, our major heart thief is our second grandson.

submitted by [biggatorsc]

heartblink - A very short interval of time, between a heartbeat and an eyeblink.

e.g., One minute she was here; then she was gone in a heartblink.

submitted by Geoff White - (www)

heartful - Artful and heart put together. As in a piece of work that has a lot of heart. Or a person who has a lot of heart and is very artful about it.

e.g., Krista's new word is quite heartful.

submitted by Krista Watters

heartillage - to seek pity or preferential treatment because of something that emotionally effects you.

e.g., Jeff threw a heartillage and got some time off cause his grandmother died.

submitted by francisweir

hearting - A little more than liking, and a little less than loving.

e.g., Lately I have been hearting him.

submitted by Delia Havran

heartred - (HAR-tread; n.) 1. The feeling of fanthink 'love,' represented by a Valentine heart on bumper stickers and t-shirts; 2. The feeling of melancholy nostalgia you get when you realize that hearting whatever you hearted when last you wore that t-shirt was just a passing fad that has faded, leaving only faddenschmerz behind. [From "heart" + "hatred"]

e.g., "How many of these 'I heart' shirts do you own?" "Oh, about a hundred." "Lots of topics, too: 'I heart Comicon,' 'I heart Annapolis,' 'I heart Chicago Pizza,' 'I heart the Olympics,' 'I heart heart t-shirts.'" "Yeah, I remember those days, when my soul was full of heartred."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

heat - A derogatory term used when something has gone terribly wrong.

e.g., Did you know she dumped Chris? That's so heat!

submitted by tabs - (www)

heat - Something risky and obvious that could get you in trouble.

e.g., Smoking pot in front of the cop shop is heat.

submitted by tasha - (www)

heat see'n missile - An alternative phrase for a missile that detects heat, as opposed to "Heat Seeking Missile."

e.g., Dem army dudes blew the tank up with a heat see'n missile

submitted by Kim Gordon - (www)

heatbag - Someone who deliberately causes trouble--verbal pain, make fun of.

e.g., That guy you were with at the party last night is a real heatbag.

submitted by Shane - (www)

heated - Angry. So outraged your face gets red and you feel hot.

e.g., I can't believe Chris walked in here with Johnnie. I am SO heated right now.

submitted by Kendra

heater - Gun.

e.g., When the cops tried to arrest her, she showed them her heater.

submitted by Jerome Greco - (www)

heather - A popular, controlling person. Inspired by the movie Heathers.

e.g., Our head cheerleader? A Heather, of course. Why, that's even her name.

submitted by damien thorn

heatscore - Someone who is heat. Someone who is possibly attracting attention from an authority figure.

e.g., You are a heatscore.

submitted by tasha - (www)

heaux - Ho, whore, a promiscuous woman. Not to be confused with a hoe, a garden implement. Extrapolating, the word could be used to refer to a prostitute.

e.g., She's a heaux, all right.

submitted by HD Fowler

heaveious - Describes anything related to light.

e.g., The greatest swords are heaveious.

submitted by TheFakeWordMaster

heavenish - Absolutely fabulous. Heavenly.

e.g., My wife is beautiful. She has a heavenish face.

submitted by Jeremy - (www)

heavenly days - Previously a mild exclamation, used only by women, to express surprise, or mild or feigned consternation. Perhaps a euphemism for (heavenly, God) and (days, damn).

e.g., Heavenly days, don't just stand there twiddling your thumb, peel us some potaters already before the sun settles in them hills.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

heavens ta murgatroid - From the old Snagglepuss cartoon. Nobody knows what a Murgatroid is exactly, but use is similar to "Heavens to Betsy" or "Great Caesar's ghost."

e.g., Heavens ta Murgatroid, I can't believe you want to watch Dawson's Creek tonight. That's it. Exit, stage left.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

heavensense - An awareness of heaven always in the back of your mind, in all that you think and feel and do. Will it contribute to attaining eternal residence in paradise with all the other true believers?

e.g., Because of their all pervasive heavensense, their demeanor and behavior are exemplary in every way.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

heavy - Adjective, used when you consider the subject to be good. Synonymous with "cool."

e.g., That music is heavy.

submitted by Ricky - (www)

heavy confetti - Cheap toys given away at birthday parties, Halloween gatherings, and carnivals, often in bags (especially when sold in grocery stores). They tend to last perhaps a day or two before you have to throw them away. Usually, little children delight in getting such bags of toys since it is for them the receipt that is fun, not the ownership.

e.g., We're having a little kids' fishing pond at the carnival, and I wound up buying about ten pounds of heavy confetti.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

heavy layer - A big chicken what lays tons of eggs, far in excess of what the average hen can do.

e.g., Jennie is our champion heavy layer -- every time you turn around another egg rolls by. She is beloved by all: fellow chickens, booster roosters, the farm animals, and all the big and little people on the spread

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

heavy metal sport - Any sport being played while intoxicated and with the wrong equipment.

e.g., Two more pints and heavy metal soccer begins.

submitted by mark

heazy - A great way of life that may include large amounts of money.

e.g., You won the lottery? You're in the heazy now, bro!

submitted by Stephen - (www)

hebb - A wipeout or going over the handle bars while mountain biking.

e.g., There was this kid who had a hebb on the trail today.

submitted by Mattew Pace

hebonics - The Jewish-American idiom, now recognized as a "second language" by some, based on English, Yiddish and other Eastern European languages. (A takeoff on ebonics, the African-American language.)

e.g., Question: "What time is it?" English answer: "Sorry, I don't know." Hebonic response: "What am I, a clock?"

submitted by natalie

heck - Spelled with initial capital letter. A milder version of Hell (Hell Light)--which usually isn't spelled with an initial capital letter. Its characteristics are lack of intense heat, no pits of boiling oil, no imps with pitchforks, etc. In fact, its climate is much like the Southeastern U.S. in the summertime, and Satan is a polite Southern gentleman with silver hair. Punishment is so mild here that it's more like a boring vacation.

e.g., Bily Joe, stop trying to see up my skirt--or you'll go to Heck when you die.

submitted by wynhgd

heck, you! menical - An extremist politician's negative attitude, applied religiously, toward any sort of compromise with members of an opposing party. I filled in my e-mail address because I want to be notified when my submittal is added.

e.g., In the past, diametrically opposed factions were able to achieve political progress through cooperation and compromise. Today, however, political factions such as the Tea Party's heck, you! menical approach stifles all debate and ends in destructive deadlock.

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

heck-meckalectic - Beyond beautiful and captivating.

e.g., Jennifer Lopez looked heck-mecalectic in that dress she wore to the awards show.

submitted by Winston G

hecka - Same as hella, used in Northern California. Can mean very or a lot of.

e.g., My teacher is hecka boring.

submitted by Chops

hecka - Clearly the same as "hella" -- an intensifier with a meaning along the lines of "very." "Hella" is presumably dead or almost dead by now, but it was at least noted in passing when it was on the scene. "Hecka" seems to have come with little fanfare and gone without notice.

e.g., Another blog title that represents the wishful thinking of its creators. This blog was alive for less than a week. Wonder how much trouble it would be for Google to determine the half-life of blogs on Blogger? Meaghan, Jessica, Kayla, and Stephanie are HOTT! Saturday, July 28, 2001 i need some more short shirts stillllll.......i have some money again. working is fun guyssss. dude, the funny part was when we locked them all out of the houseeee. that was the shit. we should go shopping again. no wait! i go shopping way too mucccch. it's defently funny to scare people away especially when they are dorky conventional losers looking in the self help section. that guy totally wanted to be in our orgy. you know what's hecka good??? vegan beer!!!!! i was drinking it with the indie winos behind some band van awhile ago. it's hecka good. i thought about how you guys, since you dont usually like the taste, would like it. it was off da hizzy fo shizzy. it made me feel young tho cause most of them were out of highschool. posted by Stephanie at 12:32 AM

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

heckabetta - A great improvement.

e.g., Real butter is heckabetta than that margarine stuff.

submitted by RAO

heckathon - (n.) (HECK-uh-thahn) In a video game, an area that includes exactly 100 smaller challenges (floors, enemies, etc.). It is almost always the final endeavor possible to be played, coming immediately before mastasis (q.v.). (Etymology: from Greek hekaton [100]; also influenced by heck [euphemism for hell] + marathon.)

e.g., Andy: "I beat the final boss, now I get to go to this cave inside of a volcano!" Sandy: "Apparently, it has 100 floors in it." Andy: "I wonder if nature just coincidentally made that volcano exactly 100 floors high." Sandy: "Nope, this is a heckathon all right." Andy: "I thought so. Please don't go in -- if we finish it we won't have anything to do on Friday nights anymore."

submitted by Mirakle B.

heckdarndangit - Alternative to cursing. Useful around children.

e.g., Owww! I just dropped the heckdarndangit sledgehammer on my foot!

submitted by Bodhi Chitta

hecticity - An overabundance of hustle, too much drama or unecessary action.

e.g., When I am out ripping and running, I know that eventually the hecticity of being out and about will catch up to me.

submitted by Thomas Maddox - (www)

hective - From Anne B.: Hectic + active: "My favorite portmanteau came from our two-year-old daughter, whose response to the question 'How was your day [at daycare]?' was, 'Oh, hective, very hective.' We assume that it was a combination of hectic and active, but whatever the source in her mind, it remains a wonderfully descriptive word for busy family life."

e.g., The day we were inundated by the submittals from the 7th graders was one of our most hective days recently.

submitted by HD Fowler

hecuzz - Cuzzer, a male cousin.

e.g., My hecuzz Jim and I are going hunting this fall.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hederaphobia - An exaggerated, usually inexplicable and illogical fear of ivy, its relatives or even people named Ivy or Ivey.

e.g., I don't walk in the woods because I have hederaphobia. I'm afraid of posion sumac, I'm hederaphobic.

submitted by Hector

hedge - One who is forgetful or stupid.

e.g., I'm a hedge--I forgot to pay the phone bill.

submitted by Roxy Roller

hedgehawk - A predatory bird that lives in the bush down under.

e.g., Even the dingo has to watch out for the hedgehawk.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hedgemeer - A situation that turned sour without foresight to the problem.

e.g., "The party was great until the beer ran out, what a hedgemeer."

submitted by Lorri O

hedgetation - To hedge and to hesitate simultaneously.

e.g., His investment policies are formed with much hedgetation.

submitted by fredwick

hedon - International unit of measurement for fun, on a scale of 1 to 100.

e.g., Wow, my funometer says this party is cranking at 87 hedons.

submitted by sandoz

hee-haw - A whole lot of something, to an extreme.

e.g., I got a flat tire because there was a hee-haw of nails spilled on the driveway.

submitted by Peter Bonzani Jr.

heebatow - Similar to shushing. A nice, confusing way of telling someone to be quiet.

e.g., In response to someone talking too much. "Excuse me, would you please heebatow."

submitted by Jonathan

heeble - Any grody thing growing on your skin or found under your bed that you can't explain.

e.g., I thought she was a good housekeeper, but then her dog pulled a giant heeble out from under the couch.

submitted by Helen

heebus - Extraneous, irrelevant, or just clutter or excess stuff. Sometimes red tape.

e.g., They had all of these decorations and heebus all over the place. | You have to get through all of this heebus just to get what you want.

submitted by Tim Mason

heeelarious - Sarcastic way to say someone is funny--when they're not. Also "hehelarious."

e.g., The more times you tell that joke, the more heeelarious it gets. (Follow by rolling your eyes for effect.)

submitted by Jeffro

heegy - A word to describe the feeling you get when something is close behind you, generally causing you to hunch your shoulders, especially when driving. From "the heebie-geebies."

e.g., "The person standing over my shoulder made me feel heegy."

submitted by Meredith

heek - A belly button piercing.

e.g., Did you see her heek? She was beheeken.

submitted by Anthony Paynter

heels over head - To feel an intense attraction for someone.

e.g., I'm so heels over head for Mike, I'm mentally picking out our linens.

submitted by nitag - (www)

heen - Used to identify white trash.

e.g., I was surrounded by heen at the Texas State Fair. They were the Tulsa State Fair a week or so earlier. OR "Do I look like a heen."

submitted by Tiffany

heep - Any pile-of-junk beat-up 4 wheel drive truck/SUV. Especially referring to beat-up Jeep brand products

e.g., Bob needs to retire that smoke-belching Heep.

submitted by biff

heesh - Contraction of the he and she pronouns.

e.g., Whoever ate the last hot dog -- which was mine -- heesh should come forward.

submitted by Rex and Stover

heffalump - Playboy Mansion Affliction

e.g., 1. Hugh was staring at a very-scantily clad Bunny while walking down a hall and cracked his head on a wall sconce, suffering a Heffalump. 2. Hugh was staring at a very-scantily clad Bunny and developed a Heffalump (and at HIS age, too!).

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

heffalump - (n.) a [n American] Republican. [from a.a. Milne's _heffalump_, a creature resembling an elephant (which is the signof the Republican Party).] (see _eeyore_.)

e.g., Who is this year's heffalump for governor?

submitted by S

heffalumps and woozles - Elephant-like creatures that enjoys stealing "hunny" from Pooh Bears. Found in most colours and patterns--black, brown, plaid, etc. Normally accompanied by a woozle or two.

e.g., Beware of the heffalumps and woozles; they come at night and steal your hunny.

submitted by Jen - (www)

heffler - For a shallow bond between two otherwise strangers based on a stupid inside joke or one-time experience.

e.g., Quick, hide. If that heffler, sees me he's going to tell the joke about the time we were at a party and the dog died. That's all we have in common.

submitted by geof

heft - Obliged, required (Appalachia)

e.g., I heft a go now.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

heh - Expression of wry amusement.

e.g., Look, Chris peed his pants. Heh.

submitted by melissa

heifervescence - The bubbling forth or exuding of the uniquely unpleasant combination of human sweat and the odor of cow. Heifervescent.

e.g., While Bill remembered his time of courting Liz with great fondness, he also remembered that it took a few minutes each evening on the porch swing of her parent's farmhouse to re-acclimate to Liz's heifervescence.

submitted by Dave Violette

heifetz - To screw up something easy, often repeatedly.

e.g., Chris keeps forgetting what side of his car the gas goes into. He's a heifetz if ever there was one.

submitted by Milt Cheeseneck

heift - To complain repeatedly about something that is accepted by most others.

e.g., Chris is heifting again about the cost of milk.

submitted by Lachlan Penman

heilon - A person who tries to constantly rule or control others by intimidation, threat, loud shouting, verbal abuse, nasty notes, or other means; one who thinks he is a “Heil” person, like Hitler.

e.g., Our boss is a most horrible heilon who must be obeyed in all ways, and the abuse never stops.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

heim - To selfishly steal or take away, wanting something all to yourself. The problem is, it is usually something others do not want anyway.

e.g., I want to heim that fat chick from her boyfriend. That fatass proceeded to heim all the cake before I got a piece for myself. That person is a heimer. A cakeheimer, if you will.

submitted by drhammer

heim pisst - A seemingly bastardized German phrase meant to express one's unhappily contentious state.

e.g., My German made car won't start this morning. The battery's dead and jump starting it doesn't work. My local AAA informs me that my plan covers only American made cars. Neighbors are jumping into their autos and driving happily off to work. Not me. Frankly, "Heim pisst!"

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

heimgehenfreude - (Rhymes with LIME-gay-hen-DROID-eh, or LIME-gay-en-DROID-eh; n.) 1. The feeling, actual or anticipatory, of going home for the weekend, especially 2. the feeling of going home for a long weekend. (From the German for "home-going-joy"... sorta.) (Cf. nosthedonia, sasumo.)

e.g., "Long weekend! What are you gonna do?" "I'm going surfing!" "My wife and I are going skydiving!" "We're gonna watch all of Monk straight through!" "I'm going to Boston to examine some very old coins ... perhaps I'll buy a few." "Whoa...this is good Heimgehenfreude."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

heineken remover - Not only a mispronunciation of Heimlich maneuver, but also what you call a significant other who keeps taking your beer out of the refrigerator.

e.g., Dammit, where'd you put my beer, you … you Heineken remover?

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

heinleiner - One who follows the "teachings" of the author Robert A. Heinlein. First seen in the book Steel Beach by John Varley.

e.g., A. Do you believe in gun control laws? B. No way -- I'm a Heinleiner. "An armed society is a polite society." (You may not believe in them, but there's proof that they exist.)

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

heinosity - The state of being heinous.

e.g., That new guy -- Chris? -- reeks of heinosity.

submitted by The HeartBurn Kid

heinous - To be extremely ugly and disgusting individual.

e.g., He was an incredibly heinous man.

submitted by Makayla Gritt

heir cut - That's where an heir gets cut out of a will. (ED. Something is awry. If she's cut out of the will, doesn't that mean that she's not an heir? Seems we need a new word for someone one who has been heircutted, although, technically, I suppose one doesn't actually have to inherit anything to be considered an heir.)

e.g., Grandma Hoofcoot wanted to write a new will; she wanted to give an heir cut to naughty grandkids Longtooth and Mightyroar.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

heir cut - That's when you get cut out of the will. Humor the old man or lady, be genuinely nice to them, cuz you don't want to be the victim of a nasty heir cut.

e.g., At the reading of the will, Will was startled to learn that he was the recipient of an heir cut. Now he couldn't even afford to get a fresh haircut.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

heir-head - Rich young person thrust into the public eye, who has far more money than sense.

e.g., As her TV show proves, Paris Hilton is a real heir-head.

submitted by krelnik - (www)

heirarchy - A hierarchy made up exclusively of males. Also accommodates misspellings and ytpos.   

e.g., Oskar Groening was not convicted of murder. He was convicted of being an accomplice to murder -- for committing acts that benefited the German heirarchy.

submitted by Miss Speller

heisenberg - To alter something by studying it. From Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle.

e.g., We will continue the experiment until we heisenberg it into something we don't recognize.

submitted by Joel Parker

heisenbungle uncertainty principle - The law that describes what happens when the greed of Wall Street operates freely without strict oversight by the Federal government.

e.g., We don't know exactly what the Heisenbungle Uncertainty Principle is or does, but we do know that, since October of 2008, it's added a lot of uncertainty to OUR principal.

submitted by Machiavellean & . . . Lesko - (www)

heisman - Giving someone the Heisman stiff-armed pose.

e.g., I asked her to dance, but she gave me the Heisman.

submitted by jimamy

heismanize - (v) To heismanize, or to give the heisman. Typically a female move, the act of crossing one arm across one's chest while extending the other arm straight in front of one's body, as if to block someone. Mimicking the "Heisman Trophy" body positioning, minus the football.

e.g., "I went to kiss her and she blocked me, pushed me away," he said incredulously to his friends. "She heismanized you, man!" "You got the heisman!" See heisman.com for true visual.

submitted by Stephanie

hejob - To destroy.

e.g., He wants to hejob that toy.

submitted by Brady Craig - (www)

heke - (n) A word made up for use in a game. (v) To make up such a word.

e.g., I challenge. That's not a word; that's a heke.

submitted by Ken

hektic - Good or exellent.

e.g., Her old green Pontiac was one hectic car.

submitted by lopedog

hela - A word to add on to other words.

e.g., You guys are so hela-stupid.

submitted by jess

helicopter wife - A wife who "smothers" her spouse with over-attention...hovers too much.

e.g., My spouse, instead of giving me a little lee-way, has become a classic helicopter wife.

submitted by Michael Nova

helium heaven - The magical place that balloons go to after they fly away or deflate.

e.g., At the rock concert, they released dozens of balloons and they all went to helium heaven.

submitted by Chris

hell zone, the - (n.) the area, period, or location proscribed or mandated by an "X the hell Y" construction (where X is either (1) an imperative or hortatory verb construction or (2) an interrogative pronoun, pro-adverb, or determiner, and Y is either (1) a preposition or prepositional phrase or (2) a linking or helping verb (normally)).

e.g., For example, "stay the hell away from me," the hell zone is the area into which or the period during which the speaker does not wish the speakee to enter or remain. The same rule applies to such commands as "get the hell up," "leave me the hell alone." Of the second sort (pronoun + be or do, etc.) are such classics as "where the hell are you?!" (generally meaning that the speaker is seeking the hell zone the speakee occupies at the time) and "what the hell do you want?" (the speakee's desire being a hell zone the speaker does not wish to enter).

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

hell's bells - interj An exclamation of impatience, anger, emphasis, etc : Hell's bells, Maude, I did that two whole years ago (1912+). Dictionary of American Slang (Fourth Edition). © Harper Collins Publishers, Barbara Ann Kipfer & Robert L. Chapman

e.g., Hell's bells. It hasn't been a month since I mowed my lawn and already the grass is up to my knees. Damn, I wish my dole check was bigger so I could hire the job out.

submitted by HD Fowler

hell-fire cubed - Extraordinarily wonderful, obscure, esoteric and eclectic.

e.g., "Have you seen my wind-up mobile phone charger?" said Ermintrude. "Yes, I think it's hell-fire cubed." replied Dougal, agog.

submitted by Colin Taffel

hella - Used to emphasize a phrase or description. Northern Californians only. Very, a lot of. | Very or really. Use instead of wicked. Originated in Las Vegas, NV, and traveled via the punk music scene to Northern California where the word now safely resides. {ED. Contemporary slang is fleeting, and thus seldom safe anywhere.}

e.g., Let's go to John's house -- he has hella food. | That's hella cool. | "You can't expect an entire army that has spent years fighting conterinsurgency in Iraq to take a couple month course and voi la they are now large-scale war fighters -- not to mention they are hella burned out and the fact that a movie is being made about stop-loss speaks volumes about the sentiments of many soldiers. How are we suppost to fight a large-scale war with people who don't want to fight anymore?"

submitted by alex, Sara, Jerel Sarkisian - (www)

hella - Very or really. Use instead of wicked. Originated in Las Vegas, NV, and traveled via the punk music scene to Northern California where the word now safely resides.

e.g., That's hella cool. | "You can't expect an entire army that has spent years fighting conterinsurgency in Iraq to take a couple month course and voi la they are now large-scale war fighters -- not to mention they are hella burned out and the fact that a movie is being made about stop-loss speaks volumes about the sentiments of many soldiers. How are we suppost to fight a large-scale war with people who don't want to fight anymore?"

submitted by Sara, Jerel Sarkisian

hella tight - Northern California -- contemporary way of indicating something is "hip" or "cool." Texas -- phrase uttered by Northern Californians to describe the noose Texans place around their necks for inventing and overusing dumb words.

e.g., NC: This noose is hella tight. Texan: Yeah, pretty cool isn't it?

submitted by Mike Castillo

hellacious - Badass, wicked.

e.g., That was a hellacious explosion.

submitted by ryan - (www)

hellacool - Beyond cool. The pinnacle of coolness.

e.g., The ICP are hellacool tonight. They are rockin' the house.

submitted by Ben Johnson - (www)

hellementary school - Grades K1 through 6 of a Catholic educational facility.

e.g., Having been branded a "trouble maker" in kindergarten, Judson spent six more years under the guidance of the nuns at Sts. Cyril and Methodius parochial hellementary school.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

hellenhimershisturtle - Synonym for "what."

e.g., What the hellenhimershisturtle?

submitted by Tyler

helleu - How some people actually say "hello," spelled phonetically.

e.g., Helleu, this is Rachel.

submitted by Rachel - (www)

helliday - A major holiday between November and February that is made a disaster, sometimes on a yearly or frequent basis, by a person, circumstances, or living situation.

e.g., For Anne, Valentine's Day was her worst helliday. She had been without a steady boyfriend for three years.

submitted by The Feline Punk - (www)

hellodoggywoofything - A way of covering up an insult when you are feeling particularly cross.

e.g., You're a hellodoggywoofything, you are.

submitted by Mingo fred mondayburger - (www)

helloha - A greeting in Hawaiian-english language.

e.g., "Helloha! How are you today?"

submitted by Renee

helloo - "What's happening?" Best said with an upperclass British accent.

e.g., Why, helloo! Why aren't you at work?

submitted by i_monk

hellooo - What?! That's stupid. HellOOo. "Are you crazy? Are your lights on? Does your elevator go all the way to the top? Are you stupid or what?" Certainly no claim for originality on this one--and intonation is everything. Even four-year-olds know how to use this one -- at least Alec does. I gave him a "No Whining" button Memorial Day Weekend. Shortly after getting it, he came to me a bit concerned, "But, Opa, I might get hurt really bad and need to cry." I reassured him that would be all right.

e.g., Thursday following Memorial Day, Andy was getting more than a tad fussy in the early evening. I reminded him, "Alec, remember, no whining." His response, "HellOOo . . . I'm not wearing the button."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

hellthy - Hellthy (pronounced "hell thee") is the true mental and emotional status of the over-zealous health nut.

e.g., "Yes, I know -- you've told me many times before. You wake up at 5:30 a.m. and go for a five mile run. Then you do 300 push ups and work out at the gym. For breakfast every day, you have a green protein shake and 23 vitamins and supplements. "Lunch is a leafy salad, plus an 8 ounce glass of water. You abstain from alcohol, caffeine and sodas of all kinds. Dinner is restricted to 500 calories, consisting of a 4 ounce portion of lean fish or chicken and steamed vegetables. "You go for a shorter run in the early evening, and you're in bed, every night, by 10:00 p.m. Your body is in fantastic condition, but you act like a nervous wreck. "I can tell you why, buddy. You may think you're 'healthy', but, in truth, mentally, you're 'HELLTHY!"

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

helluva - Something Mr. T says.

e.g., That car is helluva fast.

submitted by Adam

helly wah - Something of a cross between cool and aloha. Can be used as a greeting or emotional expression depending on context, although no firm definition exists yet.

e.g., A: Helly wah. What's up? B: My dad just bought me a new car. Helly wah. C: That cute girl I like just asked me out. Helly wah.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

helmet - Visage.

e.g., OK, her body's tight, but how's her helmet?

submitted by rico

help m'boab - Scots expression of surprise or alarm. Pronounced "Help m'bobe."

e.g., Help m'boab, it's the truant officer.

submitted by Adam Leslie

helpee - Helpers help helpees.

e.g., What are the chances that Florida and other states (still?) allow "non-partisan" "volunteers" to help nursing home residents mark their ballots? What are the chances that most of the helpers doing that help the helpees vote for Democrats? Sight unseen, I'll go with Pareto and say that 80% of the ballots so marked are marked the way leftists want them marked -- regardless of how the helpees want them marked.

submitted by beelzebub - (www)

helpfail - Help-fail. A self-defeating attempt to help someone (esp. constructive criticism) that almost always ends up hurting or at best annoying; often revealed by the phrase, "I'm only trying to help you." | An attempt to help that fails to the point of being hurtful. | An insult disguised as helpfulness.

e.g., Criticising someone for being too sensitive will offend the person either because the recipient is too sensitive, or because the critic is hard-hearted. In either case, it's a complete helpfail. | Jack: Stop telling me I'm oversensitive and take things too personally. Jill: I'm only trying to help you. Jack: That's not helpful; that's a classic helpFAIL!

submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon - (www)

helpitive - To be very helpful in a tough situation.

e.g., Brett was not helpitive on my math exam.

submitted by Brett Boomer Reynolds

hemaglobe - The bloody state of the world. (Washington Post Style Invitational.)

e.g., Day after day all we read about is the hemaglobe.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

hemline index - Tamar Lewin: "Almost anything can be an economic indicator. Back in the 1920s, the economist George Taylor conceived the hemline index, finding that skirts got longer as the economy slowed. These days, there’s been talk of a haircut index, with short locks signaling a market drop."

e.g., I have no idea what the hemline index is telling me -- I don't get around much anymore.

submitted by HD Fowler

hemlock - A device, which prevents the hem on a piece of clothing from changing.

e.g., My teenage daughter wanted to shorten her skirt, but I installed hemlocks on all her clothes and that ended the debate -- at least for now.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

hemmlock - It is the money that a friend tries to give you in payment for generosity that you consider a part of the friendship.

e.g., Pete: Here's some money for the coffee. John: No, that's OK, keep it. Pete: No, I insist. John: Keep your hemmlock. (Hemlock is a poisonous herb. I doubled the 'm' to indicate a shortened 'e' vowl.

submitted by Tim

hemogeny - Sphere of influence

e.g., Althouh China has a physically greater land mass, the US's Hemogeny surpasses even massive china's, extending through the globe.

submitted by David L

hemorrhoidjack - A co-worker who is a pain in the ass.

e.g., That hemorrhoidjack Brett won't stop nagging me until I do all his work for him.

submitted by J. C. - (www)

hemperbenitat - Hippopatamus.

e.g., She was as fat as a hemperbenitat.

submitted by kineom34

hen tensity - The voracious, open-eyed stare of a chicken just before its ready to peck at a worm.

e.g., Hey, whoa, young lady . . . please sit back on your bar stool. I was just showing my buddy, over a drink, pictures of my new Mercedes 500 clk convertible. Please don't look on with such hen tensity!

submitted by Charlie Lesko

hengrenade - Alternatively known as a chickenbomb, a hengrenade is basically a hen with a metal pin on the side. The pin is a cylindrical shape with a hole cut on one end, for which a metal ring can be passed through so one may pull the pin with her finger. To use, simply pull the pin and throw the hen a safe distance away.

e.g., Bob pulled a hengrenade out of his pocket and told us how it was effective in confusing the enemy.

submitted by Eight - (www)

henjuliamthygart potent - The moments, seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years or decades sliding from sanity to reality (insanity) occurs during.

e.g., Best to leave Steve alone right now, seem he's still in the blissful throws of Henjuliamthygart Potent. Just yesterday he drank a pint of interior acrylic.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

henosandalimenos - (rhymes with bean-oh-bawn-dolly-may-dose, sometimes shortened to "sandali"; n.) 1. your nemesis: the bane of your existence; 2. someone to beware of; 3.a. a bearer of bad news, b. the bad news itself; 4. the arrival of a doom long forseen and inevitable. [From the Greek heno 'one' + sandalon 'sandal'---in ancient myth, King Pelias, usurper of the kingdom of Iolcus is warned by the speaking oak of Dodona that he will be toppled by a 'one-sandalled man.' The one-sandalled man turns out to be Jason (of Argonaut fame), the son of the former king, who loses his sandal in a river as he is carrying the disguised goddess Hera across a river.]

e.g., I am told that floods from melting ice caps and wide-scale desertification are the henosandalimenos of global warming. | Barclay wins every year! I always come in second ... Barclay is my henosandalimenos.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

henry - Used to describe any animal which will be eaten. Especially useful during fishing or hunting season.

e.g., A: So Rob, did you see anything out there? Rob: Henry walked right down the trail, but I couldn't get a shot off. | Chris, come over to the tank, this restaurant lets you pick out the lobster you want to eat. Yeah, I want to eat that one ... Henry, you're going to taste gooood.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

henryish - 1. Being very strong -- along with possibly being athletic. 2. Having to do with very hard work, esp. laborious work. Based on John Henry folklore. Bunyanesque already exists.

e.g., Bo Jackson was known as a henryish athlete, football player, and baseball player. | Hulk Hogan was henryish. | John Henry was a steel-driving man, known for henryish railroad track building. | Slaves often did henryish work for narcissistic and somewhat lazy slaveowners. | I never was into henryish big garden work.

submitted by Marcus Mitchell - (www)

hentai - Japanese word for someone or something perverted. Also used for pornographic or adult anime or manga (comics).

e.g., Chris got caught last night looking at hentai. His mother grounded him for two weeks.

submitted by mike sedita

hep - A 50s or earlier term meaning "I am understanding." Can also be like the modern term "cool."

e.g., Do you understand? Yeh, I am hep to that. Jim is a real hep cat.

submitted by Dean Murphy

hep - A measure of indeterminate distance.

e.g., "When asked how far is it to any certain place, the oldtimers used to say 'Well, it's a right smart hep.' Again he annoyed the townspeople by jokingly saying he had bought 10 acres of land which by contour of the hill was actually 16."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

hepplewhite - A word for an odd piece of furniture that you can't remember the name of at the moment, such as an ottoman or a armoire.

e.g., Could you please get my cup of tea from off the hepplewhite?

submitted by Sandy

hepslang - The slang of "upper middle class high schools in the late 1940s." Suggested by Gordon Osse at "sklunklish."

e.g., No, no, no. I'm not old enough to remember hepslang. I was a teenager in the 50s, not the 40s. Not upper middle class either.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

heptacollar - Helicopter.

e.g., Seen any black heptacollars lately?

submitted by kasse

hepya, hep'ya - Short for help you

e.g., Can I hepya with your coat?"

submitted by Al Hepburn

her - Here.

e.g., Hey, you! Come her!

submitted by Craig

her, "her" instead of "their" - "Singular they is word of the year."For expert advice on the use of pronouns, refer to The Chicago Manual of Style: 5.14: Noun gender, 5.225: Nine techniques for achieving gender neutrality, 5.227: Gender-neutral singular pronouns, 5.41: Pronoun and gender,5.45: Special uses of personal pronouns, and 5.46: The singular "they."The PseudoDictionary uses "Fowler Style" for pronouns.We will use the editorial we only rarely.We mostly insist on pronoun-antecedent number agreement. Singular they will not sometimes be used, as suggested by Baskervill and Sewell's 1896 style guide, An English Grammar.From linguist (and descriptivist) Gabe Doyle's blog"Motivated Grammar: Prescriptivism Must Die!": "[W]hile he is preferred to singular they in general, they is "frequently found when the antecedent includes or implies both genders. The masculine does not really represent a feminine antecedent […]" (Italics in original.) Further, as an exercise, [Baskervill and Sewell] give examples of singular they, and tell the reader, "In the above sentences, unless both genders are implied, change the pronoun to agree with its antecedent." (Again, italics in original.)"Then, from Steven Pinker:"The logical point that everyone but the language mavens intuitively grasps is that everyone and they are not an antecedent and a pronoun referring to the same person in the world, which would force them to agree in number. They are a "quantifier" and a "bound variable," a different logical relationship. Everyone returned to their seats means "For all X, X returned to X's seat." The "X" is simply a placeholder that keeps track of the roles that players play across different relationships: the X that comes back to a seat is the same X that owns the seat that X comes back to. The their there does not, in fact, have plural number, because it refers neither to one thing nor to many things; it does not refer at all."We reject as sexist the traditional use of he, him, and his as pronouns … equally applicable to a male or female person." Doyle's essay on singular they is the best I've seen on the subject. In it, he's pulled together several arguments for accepting singular they. What I quote from him and Steven Pinker has been sufficient to cause me to rethink my tenaciously held position and back off from it a bit -- more than a bit, actually. Let's say a byte. The two have given me a logical reason for changing my mind -- instead of a political reason, which was all I had ever been given before. However, I intend to continue my mission to change hes to shes and hims and hiss to hers when I run across them in the pronoun-antecedent relationships for which I was taught to use he as if it were gender neutral. Otherwise, I might feel bound to scrap most of the rest of this. Nota bene: Henceforth, when we edit entries to bring them into conformance with our style, the modifications will be indicated with an underscore to draw attention to the change. A «del» tag will be used only when we think it's important to show what the text was before it was changed; otherwise, reading can become unnecessarily difficult.Reiterating: Sentences where pronouns do not agree with their antecedents in number are, in our opinion, grammatically incorrect. Rather than use her or she to avoid an error a mismatch in agreement, it may be better to recast a sentence to be gender neutral. (A short lesson on how to use personal pronouns.)Some people have become so fearful of offending that they go out of their way to avoid using what they've been told is sexist language. Instead, they useawkward constructs such as he or she, he/she, he|she,him or her, his or her, and s/he. Public schools once taught students to alternate the use of feminine and masculine pronouns. Keeping track to do that must have been fun -- and must have made editing hell. (Did the Swedish school found through the link below really ban the use of boy, girl, her, & him?)Others go even further, using plural pronouns to refer to singular antecedents of a clearly stated gender. No less than the estimable New Oxford American Dictionary has fallen prey to political correctness. For witling, it offers "a person who considers themselves to be witty." What a horror that is. Did someone sneak it in? Still others have gone so far as to use the non-existent themself to avoid using a masculine pronoun.A reminder: A word's appearance in the pseudodictionary does not make it a real word, merely a pseudo-word. We take no responsibility for your use of words from the pd. Use them at your peril. What was submitted to the pd"Dorkasaurus: Someone who is so intensely dorky, the word dork alone will not do them justice." To be politically correct, them was used in the preceding sentence. However, them is not grammatically correct. Someone is singular and them is plural. A singular antecedent calls for a singular pronoun, so we have an error: lack of agreement in number. (I know all I need to know about the historical use of singular they. I also know that things change. But you'll have to drag me kicking and screaming into accepting the use of singular they. Why not just let me die in peace?)Sixty years ago, political correctness was not in vogue. The masculine pronoun him (or he or his) was accepted as standard English usage when a third-person pronoun referred to a gender-neutral singular antecedent.In the first sentence above, him would have been used instead of them. However, using him is now viewed as politically incorrect, as insensitive. What we need is a new accepted English usage. A usage that is correct for the prescriptivists and standard for the descriptivists.My modest proposal, Machiavellean Standard #1, in lieu of an as yet undetermined neologism (Mikhail Epstein offers up hu.): Use her instead of him for sentences in which a third person singular pronoun refers to a singular gender-neutral (or gender-unknown) antecedent.Her maintains conventional English pronoun-antecedent agreement in number and, at the same time, avoids the political incorrectness of him. Thus,"Dorkasaurus: Someone who is so intensely dorky, the word dork alone will not do her justice."This new rule will also help prevent such atrocities as this: "I would interpret that as a law that was originally drafted with men in mind. I'm sorry, but if some woman were walking through a downtown area park with nothing covering the bottom half of their body, I would see that as a violation." Applying MS#1 yields something much more sensible: "I would interpret that as a law that was originally drafted with men in mind. I'm sorry, but if some woman were walking through a downtown area park with nothing covering the bottom half of her body, I would see that as a violation." Voila! Now we have both gender agreement and number agreement. The error of using a gender-neutral plural pronoun to refer to an obvious female gender singular antecedent has been avoided. Some may object that the antecedent someone is gender-neutral, while the pronoun her is not. I maintain that her is still politically correct, any slight discrepancy in gender agreement notwithstanding. Using the masculine form has been avoided -- that's the main objective of political correctness, is it not? (There's little we can do for those who insist on using womyn. They're pretty much hopeless.) Note: It is especially important to use Machiavellean Standard #1 for negative examples. That way you can be politically correct even though you are sticking your finger in someone's eye.Nota bene. In a February 2012 decision for the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals, Chief Judge Alex Kosinski wrote, "Taking on a roommate means giving him full access to the space where we are most vulnerable." Then there's Associate Justice Antonin Scalia in the Supreme Courts opinion in Lujan v. Defenders of Wildlife, "It goes beyond the limit, however, and into pure speculation and fantasy, to say that anyone who observes or works with an endangered species, anywhere in the world, is appreciably harmed by a single project affecting some portion of that species with which he has no more specific connection." If Kosinski and Scalia continue to use masculine pronouns with indeterminate antecedents, who am I to insist on doing otherwise? More from The Chicago Manual of Style:Q. I hope I'm not losing my mind. I've been told that "they"and "their" are used incorrectly in this sentence: "The telltale sign of a right-winger: they can't write in English to save their lives."I agree that it's an awkward sentence, but is "they/their" used incorrectly? Thanks! A. The use of they as a singular is a hot topic in online grammar forums. By traditional standards, the sentence is incorrect because it contains no plural noun for they to refer to. Traditionally, the correct versions are "The telltale sign of right-wingers: they can't write in English to save their lives" and "The telltale sign of a right-winger: he can't write in English to save his life." The growing acceptance of they as a singular pronoun is in response to a need for a gender-neutral pronoun that avoids the use of he to mean he or she. Good writers would make right-winger plural to avoid the appearance of incorrectness or gender bias, but in other sentences the plural is not a good option: "Someone ate my Twinkie, and they'd better watch out!" In those contexts, many language experts now approve of the use of they. You can learn more by searching online for "singular they." We have adopted a new convention: Use the femininegeneric third-person pronouns her, hers, and she in places where masculine pronouns have traditionally been used as pronouns of indeterminate gender. We will edit submittals to conform to our style and usage conventions.

e.g., Dorkasaurus: Someone who is so intensely dorky, the word dork alone will not do them her justice. | Eva Marie Saint, who starred in North by Northwest"ach actress was at a different stage of their life: we were different ages, some married, some not. My experience with Hitch was one of utter respect, warmth, friendliness, and humour, and North by Northwest. was a glorious time in my life. (ED. One supposes people have become so accustomed to avoiding the use of masculine pronouns in predicates that they reflexively use their whenever a third person pronoun is called for. In this instance, we have a pronoun-antecedent relationship in which the antecedent is clearly both feminine and singular. Her is the correct choice. However, with the word actress more and more often being replaced by the unisex word actor, following the Baskervill-Sewell "rule," many would not object to the use of the plural their despite the still singular antecedent. Many wouldn't. I would. Interestingly enough -- to me -- it apparently wasn't yet fashionable at the time Ms. Saint made her remark to refer to actresses as actors.) |"If in fact a sympathizer gets ahold of this list and is readily able to identify you as being his her neighbor and, then, decides (because they're she's a sympathizer) to go out and do something horrific to you, there is no way to calculate the potential or to prevent that." |The DiplomadThe Orlando atrocity has sent the progs to the moon in a blast of, well, lunacy. Per the progs, an inanimate object, a gun, caused the Orlando massacre. Now, of course, this might be anecdotal, but since I returned to the States, I have monitored my guns every day; none has yet to burst out of either the glass cabinet or the steel safe, and go on a killing frenzy. Maybe I have very well-mannered guns? I notice, too, that my cars have never roared out of my garages to kill, or self-identify as IEDS; nor have any of my pressure cookers become a bomb; likewise, no member of my collection of knives, daggers, and swords has lunged at passers-by. I, however, am keeping a watchful eye on the boxcutter in my toolbox -- don't trust him/her/it/zhe, at all.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

herb - The "h" is not silent. Hip synonym for dork or nerd. (ED. "Hip"? Surely you jest, Camille? Yes, you definitely jest. "Hip" went out with spats.) The Assimilated Negro: The TAN Guide To Slang, Slurs, And Slander A herb is a stereotypically dorky individual. But herbishness is not so much about people, it's more a style and characterization. A lot of hipsters like to dress herb-chic for example. And yes, you do pronounce the "H." Herbs don't smoke herb.

e.g., Did you see Chris in the Hootie shirt? That confirms it. He's a herb.

submitted by camella

herbal tea smoker - An older, bad influence.

e.g., You should stop hangin' out with that herbal tea smoker.

submitted by Big Bob

herbivore - Young men who show little or no interest in sex. | Wikipedia: "Herbivore men or grasseaters are a social phenomenon in Japan of men who shun marriage or gaining a girlfriend. They are characteristically described as frugal, and interested in personal grooming. Under this categorisation scheme, men and women are either herbivore type or carnivore type. As of September 2010, 36% of Japanese men between the ages of 16 and 19 perceived themselves in this way. Additionally, two surveys of single men in their 20s and 30s found that 61% and 70%, respectively, considered themselves grass-eating men. This phenomenon is viewed by the Japanese government as a leading cause in the nation's declining birth rate, prompting the government to provide incentives for couples that have children, including payouts and free health care."

e.g., Another worrying statistic was the increasing number of young men with little or no interest in sex, a group known as "herbivores" in Japan. | "If you're waiting for him to make the first move, Shirley, you're wasting your time. He's a herbivore." "A vegetarian?" "No, but he's not exactly a meat-eater. ... Well, it's not so much what he eats, it's that he doesn't go hunting."

submitted by [Herb I. Vore] - (www)

herbomb - Being overtly politically correct in writing by alternately using male and female pronouns -- in a way that distracts the reader from the subject and causes a loss of continuity.

e.g., Herb intentionally dropped a herbomb underlining his activist agenda.

submitted by Johnny

herculon - A measurement unit for strength. Unspecified.

e.g., The weight was so heavy that I needed a thousand herculons to lift it.

submitted by Frederick Carraher

herd - Heard. The example would also work for an entry for "which," but I probably won't bother with that.

e.g., "Good job. The only thing I don't like is Shillerys voice. I can't stand to listen to her or Obama. Her voice is much worse though. She is the wicked which of the west (I've herd her coven is in Cal.)"

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

herdimentality - Of those with the mentality of a herd of sheep -- those who follow others, go along with ideas, easily led, flock mentality as opposed to being an individual.

e.g., The herdimentality of some people annoys me. Can't they have an opinion of their own?

submitted by Fee

herdsplance - When cattle deliberately stand with there legs spread apart to prevent being tipped over by pranksters.

e.g., It was late high school graduation night and all of Farmer Jones' cattle had gone to sleep in the field in the herdstance position assuming there might be some attempt at cow tipping by intoxicated graduates.

submitted by Mary Mulkey

herdsurfer - A person caught in the huge lines waiting to utilize attractions or services rendered by theme parks or governmental institutions, such that she feels like a herd animal.

e.g., "I'm tired of this endless herdsurfing." said Jenny.

submitted by Ike - (www)

hereditate - When one person starts to incorporate actions, expression, or sayings that she has picked up from someone else into her daily life, it isn't hereditary or inherited, it's hereditated.

e.g., He hereditated that from his wife. | When you spend a lot of time with someone, you begin to hereditate her habits.

submitted by Brian Kusmack - (www)

heredition - An addition to the family; child.

e.g., Maria brought a heredition when she birthed her new son. Her heredition is quite beautiful.

submitted by Andrew Mitchell

herison - Dialect word from Cumbria (NW England: Lake District, Beatrix Potter country) for a hedgehog.

e.g., Amos, look there's a herison on't road. When it is scared the herison rolls itself up into a ball.

submitted by David Ford

herk - Hell of a jerk.

e.g., I thought Chris was OK, though a bit of a thug. He turned out to be a herk.

submitted by Lisa O and Salty

hermaphrodite - One hell of a mixed-up Greek god.

e.g., Great God Hermaphrodite. I can't do anything with my haiiiiiir and I don't know what to weaaaaaaar.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

hermatory - "a private space for contemplation, reading, etc."

e.g., I'm going to my hermatory for a little while.

submitted by Jim

hermitate - To act like a hermit when you have the desire to be left alone to meditate.

e.g., Naw. I don't want to go out tonight. I'm going to hermitate.

submitted by Tami

hermitized - Isolated and out of touch with society.

e.g., He had been withdrawn from society so long that he became permanently hermitized. He never had contact with another living person again ... well, at least until he wasn't living himself.

submitted by Linda L. Dowd

hermitude - Being alone or remote from society, sought especially when one is weary of company.

e.g., I'm cranky and would prefer to be left to my hermitude.

submitted by Sharyn - (www)

hermitude - A combination of the words "hermit" and "attitude," indicating the suggestion of the "hermetic vas" spoken of by Jung. In Jungian terminology, the Hermit is the archetypal "Wise Old Man." The hermit, being "the primitive man who trusts the unconscious" (von Franz on Jung's "Zofingia lectures") is one whose way of life is concerned with authenticity, the inner attitude to life, and developing one's inner and intuitive life, as opposed to playing a role in the external world of socio-politics.

e.g., my hermitude broken, beached moonjellies become visible D.W. Bender (Hermitude, as used in a haiku poem.) For the one in hermitude, a simplicity of life and thought begins to unfold.

submitted by DW Bender - (www)

hermute - To seal someone's mouth using Sellotape(TM) or some other self-adhesive material.

e.g., Miles was sick and tired of Colin's incessant prattling so he hermuted him with no further ado.

submitted by Miles Gavin

hernt - A derisive exclamation in response to something uncool or queer.

e.g., As the man with the food-stained shirt passed by, Jim turned to Hildegard and said "Hernt."

submitted by James Coffin

heroine - Heroin. We should be so lucky as to be able to replace heroin with heroines.

e.g., "Share his heroine needles with him."

submitted by

herosive - Cross between hero and repulsive. Used in bar-time scenarios where others tell their made-up heroic stories. The result is invariably extreme cases of boredom or aggression.

e.g., If I have to listen to another of Chris's herosive stories, I may kill myself. Better yet, kill him.

submitted by Andrew - (www)

herpagonasypaliadarts - Herpes gonorrhea syphilis AIDs genital warts.

e.g., She is so nasty I bet she has herpagonasypaliadarts.

submitted by Marcus

hersatz - A German transvestite.

e.g., Hilda's stubble gave the game away. Hilda was hersatz.

submitted by Matthew May

hershel - To elicit secret information from someone by pretending you already know it. Named for the guy who perfected the skill.

e.g., I wasn't going to mention to my boyfriend that we met those guys last night, but he hershelled me into telling him.

submitted by Pineapple - (www)

hesh - To replace "he or she" or "he/she."

e.g., If hesh is chosen for the lead role, hesh'll have to be at every rehearsal.

submitted by J.Alves

hesidigitation - Pausing one's hand while reaching for something. The verb form is hesidigitate.

e.g., Jane hesidigitated momentarily over the Belgian Chocolate truffle, then grabbed it and stuffed it into her waiting mouth.

submitted by Karen Erickson

heslop - A person who does the dishes, but ignores the cheese grater, frypan, and saucepan.

e.g., Don't be a heslop, John. Clean the cheese-grater before you cut out.

submitted by Shantelle Arundell

hess - basically this word is used where people from the UK would say 'loads'. It is usually put in the place of 'very' or 'heaps'. Said as the high tonal point in the sentence

e.g., that would be 'hess' cool thats 'hess' expensive man

submitted by Steve_o

hestia - Acronym: "Holds Every Size Tit In Australia." This is a product found in most lingerie departments.

e.g., Today I am wearing my Hestia bra.

submitted by Kirkus - (www)

het man hug - That strange ritual wherein guys shake hands, then abruptly pull together and slap each other on the back once or twice. They then back off just as abruptly, to make sure people don't think they actually like each other or something to that effect.

e.g., He het man hugs his own dad for God's sake. How insecure is that?

submitted by Meredith

heterobellion - (n.) 1. A set of simultaneous uprisings or revolts, each of which is aimed at a different goal; 2. a rebellion made up of groups united in tearing down the current norm, but each desiring a different state of affairs to replace it. (See also "vicarza" herein.) [Hetero "different" + bellion (from "rebellion") < bellum "war."]

e.g., The miners' revolt seeks better working conditions; the student think they want to overthrow the "man" and replace him with a socialist ruling council; and the southern rebels want their own country. It's heterobellion everywhere.

submitted by Scott M. Ellswworth - (www)

heteroflexible - Someone who is primarily heterosexual but may engage in some homosexual acts. Not a synonym for bisexual. | "Mostly straight." | Stumbled across this word recently with no context given for it. Until I locate something different, I'm going to take it to mean a person who is up for sex acts of any sort as long as the other person involved is of the opposite sex. (ED. Yeah, that's right -- H.D., Marty, and I are dinosaurs, from a generation where we heard the word gender only in English class. It was used to classify pronouns by gender: feminine, masculine, neutral.) (Duplicate.} Salon.com: Heteroflexibility Wednesday, Nov 15, 2000 8:31 PM UTC The latest semantic ploy to keep sexual options open really pisses me off. Laurie Essig There is nothing like teaching college students to make a person feel hopelessly out-of-date. This fact first hit me at the tender age of 30. I was teaching what I thought was the hippest version of sociology imaginable. As part of my haute hipness, I had included readings on Elvis Presley. None of the students, however, had the faintest idea who Elvis Presley was. One thought that he might have been an actor. Another said she thought he had invented a diet because he had always been fat. The generation gap between the students and me was bad enough, but then my teaching assistant, a nice man who was neither as young as they nor as old as I, decided to help me communicate more effectively the King’s cultural significance. “Elvis Presley,” he explained to the students, “was someone our parents used to listen to. He sang this stuff called rock ‘n’ roll. It came before rap music.” The students nodded their heads, as if they had just remembered that rap music did not always exist. I shook mine, having realized for the first time that Elvis really was dead. And in Elvis’ death, I felt my own mortality. Faced with the eternal youth of college students, my own aging can only become more obvious with each passing semester. I vowed to accept this fact gracefully and never again try to wow them with my knowledge of popular culture. But now it’s not just popular culture that divides us. It’s sexuality as well. Oh I don’t mean straight, gay or bi. I don’t even mean queer. What I’m talking about here is “heteroflexibility.” If you don’t know what that is, it’s time to admit that you’re as out of it as I am. Heteroflexibility is the newest permutation of sexual identity. According to my students, a person uses heteroflexibility in the first person, as in “I’m heteroflexible.” This means that the person has or intends to have a primarily heterosexual lifestyle, with a primary sexual and emotional attachment to someone of the opposite sex. But that person remains open to sexual encounters and even relationships with persons of the same sex. It is a rejection of bisexuality since the inevitable question that comes up in bisexuality is one of preference, and the preference of the heteroflexible is quite clear. Heteroflexible, I am told, is a lighthearted attempt to stick with heterosexual identification while still “getting in on the fun of homosexual pleasures.” One student, Lisa, explained it like this: “Heteroflexibility is Ally McBeal kissing Ling.” I pretended I knew what she was talking about, but of course I didn’t (and not just because I don’t watch television). My reaction was predictable. I was ashamed of my own inability to stay current, and I was also deeply pissed. How could these kids go and invent yet another identity when “we” solved that problem for them in the 1980s and ’90s? The word they were looking for was “queer” or even “bisexual,” damnit. I was angry that they would throw out the politics and the struggles of naming that had come before them. And what did they throw it out for? A monstrosity of a word, a mix of sexology and yoga practices. My anger wasn’t just the anger of the middle-aged toward disrespectful youth (even if it was primarily that). I resented the fact that they would root their marginal sexual practices in the safety of heterosexuality. I resented that they would be so committed to not having primary relationships with someone of the same sex that they would preclude such possibilities with that abominable prefix. I resented that feminism had died so that women now felt free to name their primary commitment to men while proclaiming their sexual availability to other women. And then my middle-aged rage mellowed enough to see the true genius behind this new term. Heteroflexibility — not homosexuality or bisexuality — would bring about an end to the hegemony of heterosexuality. Think about it. The opposite of heteroflexible is heterorigid. Imagine saying to anyone that you’re heterorigid. Sounds awful, right? Like some very stiff politician in a suit and tie who is so busy being heterorigid that he can’t relax his sphincter muscles enough to look natural. Heterorigidity has none of the promises of pleasure that heterosexuality has. There is no sexual potential in an identity rooted in denial of possibility. Of course, it’s not just heterosexuality that will wither away with the advent of heteroflexibility, but homosexuality as well. Being homorigid doesn’t sound as appealing as homoflexible. Homorigidity brings to mind the lesbian who won’t even have penetrative sex because she’s afraid it might be too much like heterosexuality, a person so bent on identity that her sexual desires get bent into knots. I can imagine a world where rigidity of any variety becomes as taboo as homosexuality used to be. In the post-rigid age, we will all identify as flexible (even if we’re not). And sexual identity will become much less mired in the unimaginative binary of hetero and homo. The world will in fact start to look a lot more like that queer nation “we” envisioned when we were in school — just like the queer nation we envisioned turns out to be not that different from the one envisioned by the gay liberationists before us, and the homophiles before them and so on and so forth. And so my students will replace me and others like me with new imaginings of sexual desires. And I will become increasingly entrenched in my own generation’s way of seeing the world and sexual desires and ourselves until one day it will not be my sexual rigidity that makes me old and them young, but my generational rigidity. Or more accurately, it is my generation’s superiority that will make me old and them young, since anyone born before 1970 surely knows a lot more about sex than these heteroflexible punks ever will. Laurie Essig is a professor of sociology at Yale University and the author of "Queer in Russia" (Duke University Press, 1999). More Laurie Essig.

e.g., I_monk dates women almost exclusively, but he's been known to be heteroflexible from time to time. | "Lillith, are you heterosexual." "Yes, I am." "Exclusively?" "Yes." "Are you heteroflexible?" "I have no idea, because I don't now what the word means, Marty. Frankly, the word sounds like doubletalk to me. I do know this, though: At my age the only thing flexible about me these days is … well, nothing really."

submitted by i_monk | Lillith - (www)

heteroflexible - Stumbled across this word recently with no context given for it. Until I locate something different, I'm going to take it to mean a person who is up for sex acts of any sort as long as the other person involved is of the opposite sex. (ED. Yeah, that's right -- H.D., Marty, and I are dinosaurs, from a generation where we heard the word gender only in English class. It was used to classify pronouns by gender: feminine, masculine, neutral.) (Duplicate.}

e.g., "Lillith, are you heterosexual." "Yes, I am." "Exclusively?" "Yes." "Are you heteroflexible?" "I have no idea, because I don't now what the word means, Marty. I do know this, though: At my age the only thing flexible about me is ... well, nothing really."

submitted by Lillith

heterography -    Inconsistent spelling. Taken from Dr Goodword's Good Word Dictionary. • heterography • Printable Version Pronunciation: he-tęr-ah-grę-fi • Hear it! Part of Speech: Noun, mass (no plural) Meaning: 1. A nonphonetic or inconsistent spelling system: the use of the same letter to convey different sounds (as the C in city and candy) or different letters to express the same sound, as spelling the sound [s] C in city and S in sea. 2. An aberrant or unusual spelling, as m-i-l-c-h for milk or l-y-t-h-e for lithe. Notes: The spelling system of a language is its orthography, Greek for "correct or true writing." The trueness of writing systems varies greatly and, as we have pointed out before, English orthography is dismally heterographic, to use the adjective for today's Good Word. Be sure to reassure your children, as they learn how to spell English words, that their difficulty is not their fault. In Play: Heterographically speaking, in other words, English is a world leader: "Speaking of English heterography, I have never understood the purpose of the –ugh in though or thought." Many nations periodically introduce spelling reforms that update the spelling systems of their languages, as Germany recently did. English, however, is spoken by large populations in several different countries (Australia, Britain, Canada, India, New Zealand, the US, and South Africa), so agreement on any change is highly unlikely. Word History: Today's Good Word is a fairly recent combining of heteros "different, the other of two" + graph- "write" + ia, a noun suffix. The root graph- has a fascinating family history. The patriarch of this family is PIE *gerbh- "to scratch." In the Germanic languages it underwent metathesis, switching the position of the [e] and the [r], leading to English crab, a beast that can deliver an excellent scratch. As the rules of scratching were honed into languages, the same stem produced the stem of grammar. This is a word we will return to someday, to explain how it became glamour! (Right now we have to scratch a note of thanks to Pierre Laberge for suggesting this very, very Good Word.) P.S. - Register for the Daily Good Word E-Mail! - You can get our daily Good Word sent directly to you via e-mail in either HTML or Text format. Go to our Registration Page to sign up today! Come visit our website at for more Good Words and other language resources! Next Word: heuristic Previous Word: henchman [ H ] You will definitely want to visit Dr. Goodword's ne plus ultra word site.

e.g., Oh, sure, to you it's a misspelling. To me, it's just an instance of my practising heterography. | Have you noticed that a lot of heterographers' submittals get accepted by the PseudoDictonary? Whattaya wanna bet a lot of kids are trying to run one past their teachers?

submitted by [HD for Robert Beard aka Dr. Goodword] - (www)

heteronormative - A recent construct that seems to ... suggest that heterosexuality is normal? Whatever, it seems to me as if it's usually used in a way that suggests people who see that as being the case are in the wrong.       Oxford dictionaries: "Denoting or relating to a world view that promotes heterosexuality as the normal or preferred sexual orientation."

e.g., Am I heteronormative? Damned if I know. The people I've heard use the word are decades younger than I am, are educated in less scientific -- pseudo-scientific? -- disciplines than I am, and are much, much farther to the left in the political spectrum than I am. It's simply not the sort of word someone my age and with a Myers-Briggs INTJ personality type is going to find much use for. | "Much of the language used when discussing wedding planning is heteronormative, which can alienate homosexual couples."

submitted by HD Fowler

heterophobia - Irrational hatred or fear of heterosexuals. | To make distinctions in treatment; show partiality or prejudice against traditional heterosexual standards. Heterophobic.

e.g., Those gay guys have heterophobia

submitted by ted

hevage - Male cleavage.

e.g., It's not unusual for a man, as he gets older, to develop cleavage. I anticipated that my considerable hevage would get even more considerable when I was put on anti-androgens, but so far there's been no significant change.

submitted by HD Fowler

hevelled - Opposite of dishevelled

e.g., You're looking very hevelled since you combed your hair.

submitted by KEN

hevun - Your own version of heaven.

e.g., My hevun is like KFC--you can have a leg or a breast whenever you want.

submitted by Rabbit

hew tube - A color television set as opposed to a conventional black and white one. (From Nanny's 1960s Contemporary Word Usage.) (ED. Perhaps hue tube would work, too. As in hue & saturation.)

e.g., If you really want to add a lot of color to your life, you've got to go to a hew tube.

submitted by A Nanny Mouse

hexaboner - A penis which, when tumescent, is six inches long.

e.g., A guy who purchases condominimums for a snug but comfortable fit will not be the holder of a hexaboner.

submitted by beelzebub

hexadoogol - (also sometimes "hexagoogol"; n.) a hexadecimal googol: that is, a 1 followed by 256 zeros. [256 is written "100" in base 16.]

e.g., a hexadoogol is a bit over two-and-a-half googols.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

hexadoogolplex - (also sometimes "hexagoogolplex"; n.) a 1 followed by a hexadoogol (10^256) of zeros.

e.g., I'm not entirely certain there are a hexadoogolplex of atoms in the universe; but then, the human mind can't really grasp the size of a simple little googolplex, let alone the enormous sum comprised in a hexadoogolplex.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

hexahomosapien - A human born with six legs

e.g., I was born with six legs. I am a hexahomosapien.

submitted by snowboardinghockeyplayer3 - (www)

hexardy - The amount of tardies in school it takes before the administration makes you eat lunch in the office.

e.g., I finally hit hexardy with six tardies.

submitted by lauryn

hexelschneid - Great, outstanding, better than I could have believed, etc. Clearly of Germanic origin. Anyone who speaks German can't be all that bad.

e.g., Their hexelschneid performance resulted in the band's needing to come out for a FOURTH encore.

submitted by Nick Avery

hexercise your rites - Perform your magical rituals with vigor and enthusiasm.

e.g., Our last coven was a great success. We summoned goblins to the mix and hexercised our rites till energy flowed.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hexrays - Scare energies from the eyes of wizards or witches, the source of the evil eye.

e.g., Look out for that lizard son of a witch--he'll use his hexrays on you.

submitted by P I E - (www)

hexxadecimo - A shaving razor with sixteen parallel blades to put an end to the topping of one brand over another by adding an additional blade.

e.g., Steve was going to recommend his new Hexxadecimo to Bill as Bill had done for Steve some years ago regarding the "Quattro." What he didn't count on was shaving his lips off with the first pass.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

hey pete - A greeting alternative to "hello," "hi," or the plain "hey." It is used for groups or individuals. Adds pizazz to a conversation ... I think.

e.g., Elmer: Hey, Donald, what's up? Donald: Oh, hey pete, nothing much.

submitted by alex

hey, maria, what goes on here? - General greeting, similar to "Hey, dude, what's up?" -- but much more interesting. Adds a nice warm Italian feeling to the conversation.

e.g., You spot a friend (doesn't have to be named Maria) and call out, "Hey, Maria. What goes on here?"

submitted by Kati

hey-tang - It's a mild version of hell.

e.g., The prim and proper teacher shouted "What the hey-tang is going on in here?"

submitted by Carrie - (www)

heybros - A young male who fancies himself a tough guy, but who is generally from a suburban, upper-middle class background. Can be spotted by his red baseball cap, a truck or SUV with a sticker of Calvin from "Calvin & Hobbes" uninating on something in the window, and their distinctive greeting call: Hey Bro! See Fred Durst.

e.g., The heybros stopped at the gas station to fill up the Ford and buy some Skoal Bandits.

submitted by Jake Harold

heydoc - A drunk, injured or otherwise, in a hospital emergency room, who grabs every person in a lab coat and slurs, "Heydoc, yagottahelpme..."

e.g., "What do we have tonight?" "One broken arm, two heart attacks, and four heydocs."

submitted by The Puffin

heyla - A greeting derived from Mercedes Lackey's fantasy novels. Hello.

e.g., Heyla, dear. How are you today?

submitted by Morte - (www)

heyllo - A greeting.

e.g., Bob. Hey, how's it goin'? Gertrude. Heyllo!

submitted by Colby

heynut - A conversational word in NE Pennsylvania used when one seeks affirmation. Obscurely related to the phrase, "isn't it?"

e.g., I's pretty dam' hot today in downtown Scranton, heynut?

submitted by Charlie Lesko

hezzie - Lord of the cinema, and generally nice guy.

e.g., My word, are you THE Hezzie?!

submitted by Laura

hfil - A less offensive substitute for the word 'hell'. Comes from a clever bleeping out the bottom bars of 'e' and the first 'l', and stands for 'Home For Infinite Losers'. Each letter is said individually.

e.g., What in the HFIL are you talking about? Go to HFIL.

submitted by Rick O'Shay

hgs - Hyper Gesticulation Syndrome. An affliction in which one uses her hands excessively, especially while speaking.

e.g., My Shop teacher has HGS. I can't concentrate because I'm too busy watching her hands.

submitted by Joe Leonard

hi psi - An extraordinarily elevated degree of psychic ability, e.s.p., telepathy, lost bodies, curse your enemies, and more.

e.g., Between hi psi and sci fi I'll take the latter (or even, a ladder). Hi psi strikes one as just so much bull and blather.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hi-hosie - Also just "hosies": claiming dibs on an item. Hosey.

e.g., Hi-hosie that last piece of cake; I didn't eat any yet.

submitted by m. bedrosian - (www)

hibdawhat? - Statement of confusion and disbelief. Often used as an interjection. Pronounced quickly and as one word.

e.g., John: Jane, I'm leaving you for a younger woman. You just don't give me that sweet loving like you used to. Jane: Hibdawhat?

submitted by c. williams

hibernap - A nap taken when someone is not physically tired, but rather when one is "tired" of the weather, winter, etc.

e.g., I'm really tired of winter, so I'm going to take another hibernap.

submitted by Karen Trester

hibernice - (HIGH-burn-iss or high-BURN-iss; n.) Another name for the winter solstice, also known as the hibernal solstice (from Latin hibernus "of winter" and solstice sol "sun" + sisto "stand still"). [From HIBERN-al + solst-ICE.]

e.g., The hibernice falls on Thursday, December 21st this year [2017].

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

hibikimia - A condition found most often amongst Internet users characterized by frequent ytpos and improper grammar punctuated by occasional hiccups.

e.g., My hibikimia is actng upp tday.

submitted by Anna Lang - (www)

hibilishous - Relates to people who don't know what they're doing, so they just do something stupid.

e.g., That thing Jack did was so hibilishous.

submitted by james

hibyer - hibyer, n. (hi+bye+suffix er) -- a marginal acquaintance with whom "hi" and "bye" are the sole terms of verbal exchange; the vocabulary of a minimal relationship.

e.g., Do you know this woman? - Not really, we are hibyers. | They were married for ten years, but now they are only hibyers. | I was surprised when the hibyer stopped for a more substantial conversation.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

hicburp - To hiccup and burp at the same time. noun: a hicburp

e.g., The chili was so spicy it caused me to hicburp.

submitted by Medb - (www)

hiccleburp - A single shrieking hiccup followed by a slight exhalation of air, occuring for no particular reason.

e.g., The girl suddenly emitted a loud hiccleburp, making her friend jump with surprise.

submitted by xk*

hice - Plural of "house."

e.g., In the suburbs, it seems they're always building more hice.

submitted by Nathan

hichorogona - Chinese shoes.

e.g., The hichorogona were designed well.

submitted by Trey 7th English

hickey - A bruise caused by a suction kiss. US, 1942 | In pool, a rule infraction. From The Routledge Dictionary of Modern American Slang and Unconventional English.

e.g., If I ever came home with a hickey, my wife would castrate me -- if she could catch me. | Did you mark your hickey? I was watching you and I didn't see you mark it. Frankly, Chris, we're all getting tired of your cheating.

submitted by HD Fowler

hicnic - A "white trash" or "red neck" barbeque.

e.g., Billy Ray and his sister-wife Luanne will be sure to bring their famous opossum stew to the annual family hicnic.

submitted by Chris S.

hiddy - Excellent, great, awesome etc. Short for hideous, but means the opposite.

e.g., Got the most hiddy waves today. Awesome.

submitted by phil wild

hideosity - Something very large and very ugly. Hideous plus monstrosity.

e.g., The new owners of the property next door have torn down the lovely old house that used to be there and built a hideosity in its place -- you know, one of those imposing McMansions that practically take up the whole lot -- ruining the character of our neighborhood.

submitted by natalie

hideosyncrasies - Ugly, vulgar, grotesque, or vile eccentricities, quirks, or peculiarities.

e.g., Jelbez likes to suck the pus from the boils his chronic skin disease causes, and Milthar invokes the demon realm by mutilating frozen fry hens and eating them raw while chanting by candlelight. The hideosycrasies of some folks absolutely astound me.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

hideum - An extreme feeling of unpleasantness.

e.g., I had an awful time at the party with Jenny -- pure hideum.

submitted by Lors

hidhn - (pron. "heathen") The vast majority of the humans of planet Earth, still largely barbaric and unevolved, from the infinite point of view.

e.g., I'd far rather be infinite than hidhn. It's like the diffence between night and day, light and darkness, glorious and inglorious.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hidiom - A hackneyed, hacked or spliced idiom. May also (recursively) be referred to as a "village idiom."

e.g., 1. You can't drag a dead horse to water. From "flogging a dead horse" spliced with "You can drag ["lead" in the US] a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." 2. A wild herring. From "a wild goose chase" spliced with "a red herring."

submitted by Andy Kirkwood - (www)

hids, the - Making a noun of the adjective "hideous" -- since we have "the pits" for "pitiful."

e.g., Traffic coming from the ball park all the way home last night was the hids.

submitted by John Breen

hidy-up - Similar to "tidy-up" inasmuch as the "hidy-up" is used when clearing up an area. Where it differs is while the "tidy-up" is an ordered activity, the "hidy-up" results in the random clearance of objects, frequently into a cupboard or drawer, with the outcome that you never actually see them again. This is a technique generally deployed by girlfriends.

e.g., "Darling, have you seen my iPod?" "Yeah, dear, it's in the drawer" "Which drawer?" "Dunno." "Have you been hidying-up again?"

submitted by Pete

hiesman - To ward off potential suitors with something akin to the strong-arm stance of the Heisman Trophy.

e.g., I was fawning over this very cute girl, but then she gave me the hiesman. Once she dissed me, I figured it wasn't meant to be.

submitted by carsonr - (www)

hifenburgen - To read a magazine cover upside down and sideways.

e.g., I looked at my magazine in a hifenburgen manner.

submitted by abby

high - Crazy or weird, something that you were not expecting.

e.g., He actually thought I liked him. He's high. OR That's so high. I can't believe he went to his ex-girlfriend's house and didn't tell you. OR He's acting so high, you can tell he's lying.

submitted by VONNIE - (www)

high and tight - A hairstyle worn by many males in the US Military. Basically characterized by a buzz cut on top and shaved sidewalls on the side of the head. The polar opposite of a mullet.

e.g., When Felix stepped off the plane, I barely recognized him with his high and tight.

submitted by Paul

high bowling - Urinating on the ceramic part of the toilet instead of in the water in order to prevent audible detection from surrounding people.

e.g., "Is there anyone in the bathroom?" "I don't know, I can't hear anyone. If anyone's in there, she must be high bowling."

submitted by Dizzev

high bread - The secret ingredient is helium. And laughing gas. Truffles. Double the yeast. Eat it in space. Very expensive and exclusive. Light and fruffy. You can't afford it. Far out.

e.g., High bread is used in the best of churches; you can't go much higher.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

high helens - Flabby upper arms -- associated more with women than with men -- likely to "flap" when someone waves. From Brenda on The Neal Boortz Show. Also called bat wings.

e.g., "I noticed it in my arms. My High Helens were hanging. They are coming back around though. As for the rest of me, I'll just start saving my money." | "High Helens," you ask? Flabby arms. My sister-in-law coined the term because when they were kids, they had a neighbor named Helen with really flabby, swingy arms. And when they saw her, they’d yell "Hi, Helen" and she’d wave back, flabby arms swinging." | "Due to the large amount of excess weight I was carrying a few months ago, I have stretch marks and extra skin on my belly and underneath my arms -- High Helens they are called." | "I always thought my legs were my problem area (quite large not only by fat but muscular as well in the thighs and calves) but as a result of photos I noticed I have shocking arms. Call them bat wings, bingo wings, high helens, tuckshop arms -- whatever you like -- but I hate them."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

high knee - A euphemism for the buttocks. Obviously based on acute visual observation. Whereas, at the front, the round knee cap (the "knee") sits on the tibia. At the back, the similarly rounded form of the buttocks is seated on top of the entire leg. Hence, "high knee." (This is submitted for clarification purposes only).

e.g., Yes, that young lady has very shapely legs. However, her high knee is terrific.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

high noon - A moment of decision, when two opposing forces meet to duel it out and settle a dispute fast. From the movie High Noon where the enemies met at high noon for a duel.

e.g., Tuesday's meeting will prove to be a much anticipated high noon for the petroleum industry when environmental advocates make their case.

submitted by Natalie

high priestess of snot - Ruler (or perceived ruler) of the braggarts, prima donnas, and snobs.

e.g., As Steve patiently tried to help Chris understand the differences, pros, and cons in the faux finishes he was displaying to her, she dryly looked down her nose at him and barked highmindedly, "Who DO you think I am?" to which Steve sarcastically retorted, "Why, The High Priestess of Snot your excellence."

submitted by steve zihlavsky

high yuctose corn syrup - The artificial and unhealthy sweetener found in most processed foods

e.g., By the sickly coating I have in my throat after drinking that soda, I can tell it was made with high yuctose corn syrup and not sugar.

submitted by jeanine wisniewski - (www)

high-beams - The state of one's nipples when they are erect.

e.g., Chris: My high-beams are on 'cause it's freezing outside. Scott: Too much information, buddy.

submitted by Scott Maxfield

high-falooting - Descriptive, slightly derogatory term, used to describe someone perceived as living in a gawdy, slightly vulgar manner.

e.g., Just look at them high-falooting bigshots in them fancy cars. Highfalutin'.

submitted by Kit Johnson

high-n-tight - A very short haircut such as those given to military personnel. Very, very short on the sides and in the back, and slightly longer on top. Did Cameron Diaz once refer to her ass as being high and tight?

e.g., "How do you want that cut, Marine?" "High 'n tight, of course."

submitted by HD Fowler

highburnate - The act of being inflamed, and emotionally upset, over an incident, to the point of avoiding all social contact.

e.g., Morris was furious over President Obama's health bill-- he sqwalked (c.f.) in his living room for over an hour, and even highburnated at home for a week.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

highest common defraconator - A word used in maths to describe an unknown answer to a fraction problem. It is used as it sounds intelligent and bedazzles most.

e.g., John said "The answer to 1/34 to the sqaured root of -76 is the highest common defraconator 0f 60," baffling his teacher.

submitted by Adam Taylor

highfiveist - A person who cannot stop herself from high-fiving at the least provocation.

e.g., Jake in Accounting is a highfiveist -- he calls out the "high five" when the phone rings. It's really starting to get on my nerves.

submitted by Jonathan Glaser

highlight reel - A way to describe something happens that is classic or really funny.

e.g., When we snuck into the club as VIPs goes on the highlight reel.

submitted by Kimberly

highlightinater - Someone who uses excessive amounts of highliter pen to make sure she doesn't forget what to read.

e.g., And here's another book ruined by a highlightinaters.

submitted by

highlition - A way of referring to a highlitghted area or portion of text.

e.g., Refer to the highlition on page 213.

submitted by Chuck

highphen - The opposite (¯) (Alt 0175) of an underline (_). :·)

e.g., A hyphen is a midline dash (-) and an underline is a belowline dash (_) but I'll be hanged if I know what to do with a highphen (ÂŻ), which, technically, is called a "macron."

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

highschool - High school.   

e.g., The word smacktard was coined, as far as I know, by highschool teacher Mike Sliszowski, of GameSpy fame.

submitted by Miss Speller

hightfaced - Used when the odds odes are against you.

e.g., You are hightfaced.

submitted by Jeremy 7th English

higily-pigily - Messed up, twisted, not right. Much like higgledy-piggledy in a standard dictionary.

e.g., Aw, Mom, I don't like these pants. They're all higily-pigily.

submitted by Britt

higniffy - Have I Got News For You. Used to express intent to relay important new information or gossip.

e.g., Higniffy, Charlie. I heard that if Ferris dies, he's giving his eyes to Stevie Wonder.

submitted by JonathanB

hii-akkin - A cute little noise worms make when engaged in mortal combat. Normally when using the fire-punch maneuver.

e.g., I gon' kick yo bitch ass. Hii-akkin.

submitted by treena

hiimme - another way of saying Hi its me

e.g., (knock knock) "Who is it?" "Hiimme!"

submitted by Bruggy

hijklmno - (Pronounced various ways: Hijack Limo, Hi Jack Lemon O, Hijkilimino, even Kilimanjaro; n.) Water. [The alphabet letters between H and O, inclusive.]

e.g., "Hi. I've been wandering in the Outback for 16 months and I'm badly dehydrated, might I have some hijik?" "I don't---what's hijik?" "Hijik? Well, it's that clear stuff; you know: Jack Lemon? the hijacked limousine? Kilimanjaro?" "I don't know what you're talking about, but let me get you some water." "Yes! Yes! that's the word:'Water.' I'd almost forgotten the word." "Here. You forgot the word 'water'?" "Well, I have been 16 months---" "In the Outback." "Yes."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

hike schmettles - Person resembling Hugh Grant, John Nettles, and Micheal Shumaker.

e.g., Oi... Hike Schmettles. Get the beers in, mate.

submitted by Darren Walsh

hikky burr - It is the name of the theme song to "The Bill Cosby Show" of 1969. It was written by Quincy Jones and Bill Cosby. The lyrics are very difficult to discern, but there are some references to food. There is very little on the internet regarding a definition for this word. I think hikky-burr is a food, but one website defined it as a reference to masturbation, which I doubt.

e.g., What the hell is hikky burr other than the theme song to an old version of "The Bill Cosby Show"?

submitted by Stan Savage

hilar - Hilarious.

e.g., Oh, that was very hilar. Did you come up with that yoursef -- or are you stealing from Albert again? Hmm?

submitted by mel

hilarii - Plurally hilarious, far too funny.

e.g., That cartoon was hilarii.

submitted by stephen davis

hilariocious - Hah-lair-ee-o-shus. Funny to the point of making one laugh very heartily, roll around on the floor in laughter, laugh until one cries or wets herself. (ED. Big Nate, there's no such word as themself, so you might want to make it up and add it to the PseudoDictionary.)

e.g., Did you see when Jim got smacked in the face with that watermelon? That was hilariocious.

submitted by nate - (www)

hilarseious - Very funny--usually arse-related.

e.g., The mooner he pulled was just hilarseious.

submitted by Sarah

hilaserious - A state of emotion in which you dont know whether to laugh or cry.

e.g., The bucket just wouldn't come off Jim's foot. It was hilaserious to watch him pound at it with a hammer.

submitted by A Bergman

hilation - The marks created by a highlighter.

e.g., She had lots of hilation all over her textbook.

submitted by Aurora

hill - "Cool" or "interesting."

e.g., That's gonna be hill.

submitted by Matt

hill rat - A professional lobbyist at Capital Hill.

e.g., The average congressman will go his entire political career without ever buying his own lunch; the hill rats take care of that.

submitted by Stephen Mize

hillarious - Hilarious. New spelling for the upcoming run for POTUS by Hillary Rodham Clinton.

e.g., Won't it be hillarious when Bill Clinton becomes the First Lady?

submitted by HD Fowler

hillbilly armor - "Scavenged materials used by soldiers for improvised bullet-proofing and vehicle hardening, esp. in Iraq." From Grant Barrett's Double-Tongued Word Wrester.

e.g., "We call it 'hillbilly armor' because all we did was cut out thick steel and put it on our doors," Jackson said. "We have a really good welder who worked really hard on that to give us the extra protection." (Kuwait Daily Press)

submitted by [Grant Barrett] - (www)

hillfilly - Vivacious female from the hills.

e.g., He was just a lonely hillbilly looking for a suitable hillfilly; he did not make it.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

hillsilly - A mental handicap or craziness due to the isolation or inbreeding of people in the hills.

e.g., Better stay off his property! He’s a hillbilly that’s hillsilly.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

hilo - A semi-formal greeting combining the words "hi" and "hello."

e.g., Hilo, my name is Jeremy.

submitted by Jeremy Chin - (www)

hilton head - Not to be confused with Hilton Head, South Carolina, and environs, this refers to an act of fellatio performed by the debutart Paris Hilton.

e.g., Phew, God no, the last thing in the world I'd be interested in would be Hilton head. I'm sure I'd get some STD just being in the same room with her and breathing the same air.

submitted by beelzebub

him plants - Artificial elements, surgically inserted into female bodies, to enhance underdeveloped areas such as small breasts and flat buttocks. They are designed to appeal to, and attract, alpha males of the opposite sex.

e.g., Marcello was a true connoisseur of female pulchritude. With a mere discerning glance, he could easily determine whether he was looking at him plants or staring in admiration at the "real" thing.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

himbo - A male bimbo.

e.g., Himbo though he is, Ricky Martin is the greatest.

submitted by tiffany - (www)

himit - Gender specific appellation for a male recluse, ae opposed to the female, hermit.

e.g., To be honest, the sex of a himmit, or a hermit, isn't normally socially significant.

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

himmle - (v.) 1. To be a power-hungry, boot-licking, sycophant, especially if you begin as an unremarkable, mousey little guy without a drop of talent for administration, oversight, or organization; 2. To be second-in-command of a monstrous, inhuman, cruel, vile, self-serving enterprise; 3. To expand your own personal influence without regard to the condition of the organization you work for; 4. To bully, especially if you are a mean little nobody attacking innocents at the behest of, or to impress, a bigger bully; 5. To curry the favor of a badguy because you want to be a badguy too. [Back-formation from Himmler, the nazi chicken farmer who rose to power by parroting Hitler for ten years, bad-mouthing those whose power he wanted, taking power over operations he had no idea how to do, and, finally screwing everything up, unintentionally contributing greatly to Allied victory in the Second World War.]

e.g., In_A Man for All Seasons_, Sir Richard Rich is portrayed as himmling his way into high office. | It wasn't just Himmler himmling: Goring, Hess, Goebbels were expert himmlers themselves. | "What is it with this guy? He gets elected vice president and starts micromanaging everything---he's gonna ruin the project at this rate." "Yeah, he sure does himmle a lot, doesn't he?" "Yes, and he blames everyone but himself if something goes wrong." | "Your gonna get it, Hughes." "But not today, right ya little himmler? Without your big, strong buddies around, you're nothing but sleeze: disgusting but harmless.... Like a leech." "Wait, leeches aren't harmless! They---" "Oh, shut up."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

himrod - A male nimrod. Most nimrods are, indeed, male. Slangwise -- and there is no otherwise -- a himrod is "a simpleton, a nerd," and a dork in one of dork's nastier meanings. While trying to create a canonical list of synonyms for various shades of meaning for dork yesterday, nimrod occurred to me. Nimrod has a legitimate meaning that goes all the way back to Noah in the Bible. Nimrod was the son of Noah and was known for his prowess as a great hunter. That leads to the standard meaning of a nimrod (either lowercase or uppercase) as being "a person expert in or devoted to hunting." But we know that's not what I had in mind, since I had started with dork.

e.g., Which stupid himrod gave my cat a bath and then put it in the dryer? God'll get you for that.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

hind site - The nether place from which current U.S. economic policy is formed.

e.g., Americans will be looking up their assets until the White House changes its focus from hind site to foresight.

submitted by charlie lesko

hindernot - Do not prevent or oppose or stand in the way of.

e.g., Hindernot the wise authorities and experts and manipulators of humans when they seek to always do the right thing and make things better. (ED. Note the ironic use of the oxymoron "wise authorities.")

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hinderplexed - To be held back with confusion.

e.g., Suzie couldn't decide what to do. She was hinderplexed because she had several different cars to look at, and she didn't know which one to buy.

submitted by Nick Sullivan

hindsite - What you get when you click on "Back." | Seeing a deer.

e.g., Hindsight sent him to the hindsite. | She realized it was close behind her and that hindsite helped her avoid getting bucked.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

hindu cow, as cool as or living like a hindu cow - 1. Originally seen in Fight Club. Used to describe someone who is relaxed despite being in danger, possibly also having an indifference to personal well-being. Similarly, someone who is cool under pressure. 2. Someone who is successful without trying. Being well-off despite incompetence.

e.g., 1. The colonel is as cool as a Hindu cow--he slept right through a firefight. 2. After failing out of college and winning the lottery I was living like a Hindu cow.

submitted by Tristan

hing - When fibers on a velvet-like surface, such as upholstery lay in a different direction from most other fibers. This would apply as well to carpet, suede, etc.

e.g., I could tell where he sat by the hing marks on the sofa. OR I had just carefully vacuumed the carpet to make it hing free when the kids ran through the room.

submitted by Michael

hinge - (n.) Together with its regular meaning(s), a tweak given to spelling or font in order to signal a particular language or dialect. Such hinges can range from calligraphy (such as angular additions to signal Asian logographs, alterations to signal Cyrillic (like a backwards "R" for the Russian "ya"), or curlicues and strokes for Victorian- or Edwardian-era writing) to diaereses and cedillas to imply cultural or areal distinctness. [Coined by my son Digory to explain the practice.]

e.g., Apostrophes appear in fantasy languages as a rather cliche hinge to signal alien-ness.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

hinghong - A white person, esp. one who speaks Hinglish. A friendly and humorous term.

e.g., Some of my best friends are hinghong. I use them to learn me Hinglish and we are having happy times together, day in and day out.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hingin' - Ugly; disgusting

e.g., This warm, flat beer tastes absolutely hingin'

submitted by Woesinger

hinglan - (Hing-glin) Where the Hinglishmen, or Cockneys, stay, and who speak Hinglish.

e.g., When you come to London you must also be sure to see Hinglan and the colorful culture thereof.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

hink - To lift the nose using facial muscles to alter the position of spectacles relative to the eye.

e.g., To bring the monitor into focus Peter hinked his glasses.

submitted by Andy Steel

hinkelbonk - Bruise, scrape, or small owie.

e.g., How'd you get that hinkelbonk on your chin?

submitted by heather - (www)

hinkie - "Out of sorts, irregular or weird feeling."

e.g., "I don't know, boss... something's hinkie... Robert Biggs, The Fugitive"

submitted by Chris

hinkle pinkle - To procrastinate.

e.g., It was quoted by Anna Russell in her Verdi's Hamleto. She says "Shakespeare's play Hamlet is a fantastically complicated story, but there would have been no story at all, if Hamlet had avenged his father's death at once, instead of hinkle pinkling around."

submitted by Colin T & Emmett

hinky - The right way to spell "hinkie." :) Something that is out of whack, just a bit off, wrong, confused, suspect.

e.g., "His directions were a bit hinky, no?" "That milk taste hinky to you?"

submitted by jen hill - (www)

hintch - The cross between a hint and a hunch. Thus you have a hintch about something.

e.g., I have a hintch that the bird over there could be dead.

submitted by Giles Cotterill

hinwah - Used to describe an Oriental decked out in FUBU, kappa, etc. Carries a mobile phone around everywhere and thinks she is very tough and mugs other people to make her social image greater. After the Australian Thai gang sing wah. A symbol for an "S" is usually made while saying the word.

e.g., Bob: Check out Chris. He thinks he's tough. Johnny: Hinwah.

submitted by KCD

hiophobia - Fear of "Hi" being written too many times on a blackboard at school.

e.g., Sharon wrote "Hi" on her math teacher's board so many times that the entire class developed hiophobia.

submitted by Christine

hip cat - n. A cool person. (from jazz-era slang)

e.g., "With those duds, and those digs, he's obviously a very hip cat."

submitted by Sawyer

hip hop hippopanonymous - Hippos without names, a rarity.

e.g., That's a hip hop hippopanonymous hippo.

submitted by phil

hip hop, hippo - Move faster, hurry up.

e.g., Come on, let's go. Hip hop, hippo.

submitted by Cateyes

hip hot scene - Where hip hop is hot . . . I suppose. Ran across the expression with no context to account for its meaning. It did not appear to mean hip and hot.

e.g., Nah, whatever else Hillsdale has, it definitely does not have a hip hot scene. Not downtown and not anywhere else.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

hip to that jive - I'm very interested in that plan. That plan is both acceptable and exciting. (First used as a dare, then made its way into general usage.)

e.g., Q: What do you think about going to see a movie tonight? A: I'm hip to that jive.

submitted by Alice

hip-hop anonymous - Used by Rob Schneider in the movie, Big Daddy. A 12-step program for recovering Hip-Hop addicts. Some of the steps include admitting that breakdancing is not a sport, girls don't like pop-Locking, and that wearing an all-Adidas jump suit to a funeral is inappropriate. l

e.g., BaBy Rock: I've seen Breakin' 2, Electric Bugaloo 560 times. Tom: You need help. I should commit you to Hip-Hop Anonymous.

submitted by James

hip-pop - That delightful fusion of Hip Hop and garden-variety pop music. See: Lil' Bow Wow.

e.g., don't be kidding yourself--that group's total hip-pop.

submitted by Tony Hilliard

hipatitis - Terminal coolness. (Washington Post Style Invitational.)

e.g., There's no talking to Chris unless you're an artist from New York. He's got hipatitis.

submitted by Dana Friedman - (www)

hipnothighs - Thighs that fascinate, mesmerize, whether like those of a hippo or like no thighs at all.

e.g., Those thighs that bring sighs may be designated as hipnothighs as desired.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

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