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comshaw - A military term for requistioning without a requistion.

e.g., Hey, sailor, ain't that the Admiral's ring? Yeah, you comshawed it.

submitted by G R Roberts

comversion - Conversion to a communist.

e.g., After his comversion, Howard Dean started calling all Republicans "capitalist pigs."

submitted by Redwyre / Stoffle - (www)

con grass man - A federal or state house legislator who works hard to convince his "roots" constituency that he is working hard.

e.g., A wise Con grass man will pour out continual, smooth layers of concrete information via media interviews, speeches, newsletters, and special annoncements to cover his grass.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

con sensual - The state of a woman, who does not like sex, yet is willing to have sexual relations to please her partner.

e.g., Studies of the sexual habits of American women, show that there are millions of women in the U.S. who are frigid, but pretend to enjoy sex in order to keep their personal arrangements positive.  
On the other hand, if a woman is "turned on by convicts," then, Bingo! We have a triple meaning phrase!

submitted by Charlie Lesko

con'um drum - A percussion instrument, used while speaking, to obfuscate meaning so as not to be held accountable for content.

e.g., The politician was elected for several terms through his skillful use of con'um drums.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

conan - (n.) 1. The friend of a babysitter who comes along to help with the kids, or to just sit and do homework or whatever ["Co," as in "associate" + "Nan," short for "nanny"]; 2. Two women or girls both of whom are named "Nancy" ["co" + "Nan," short for "Nancy"].

e.g., "Who's gonna babysit, Mommy?" "Erica's coming over." "Oh, Erica's fun. She's not bringing another conan, is she?" "Well, yes, I think it's her cousin Emily." "I remember Emily. She painted everyone's fingernails black and made us wear black lipstick. She's weird." "Not anymore. After she fall off that building last summer, she's decided she really doesn't want to die, and she's stopped being a Goth." "A Goff?" "No, Goth. Goths like black and sad things." "Bleh: conan the Goth." "She's not a Goth anymore." "Okay, conan the unGothed."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

conan o'brian - For Conan O'Brian's best-known move on late night TV. Conan "jumps," then points at Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7, then does a little jump again, then spins.

e.g., Joel Goddard (LNwCOB announcer): It's Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Tonight ... Musical guest is. . . . And your host, Conan O'Brien . . . doing the Conan O'Brian.

submitted by you-don't-wanna-know

conaster - 1. With star. The exact antonym to disaster; the fortunate outcome of an almost imminent disaster; the sensation of a catastrophe narrowly averted and later remembered from the vantage point of safety. From Latin cum, with + Greek astron, star. 2. Conastrous. Of the nature of a conaster, causing great relief.

e.g., 1. There were several conasters in my life that I cannot recall without thanking God for his undeserved mercy. | You were born under a lucky star. This conaster is an amazing mixture of chance and miracle. 2. I had a conastrous experience after being caught in a storm while windsurfing.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

conbobaly - Muffled, okay, average, not great, flustered, problematic. (con.bob.lee)

e.g., Her Japanese was great, but her English was conbobaly.

submitted by Josie

concensus - The convict count. "Consensus" is misspelled "concensus" so often, we need a word spelled "concensus." No claim of originality, though. Idea of one more coming back in than went out came from a Ridley Pearson novel, The First Victim, if memory serves. Comedian Stewie Stone joked of marrying the same woman twice, which he really did: "It's like breaking out of jail and then breaking back in."

e.g., Bert: Hey, Ernie, what's goin' on? I did the concensus and we got one too many guys came in from the yard. Ernie: Nah, you musta miscounted. Bert: No, I checked and checked again. We got one too many. Somebody musta busted in.

submitted by HD Fowler

concensus - Consensus. The first time I've seen the misspelling in a long, long time. Google Books Ngram Viewer shows that the frequency of misspelling has dropped dramatically since 1980, which was when the misspelling was at its peak. {Duplicate.}

e.g., "Trump's inability to integrate with European leaders aside, there was at least some G-7 concensus on trade, after government officials were said to have found an agreement after haggling over wording on protectionism and reciprocal benefits, Bloomberg reported. Technical negotiations had stretched until 3 a.m. in Taormina to try to reconcile Trump's 'America First' approach with the other leaders' commitment to open markets."

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

conch, the - TV Remote Control. The Conch from William Golding’s "Lord of the Flies" represented power and order over all else. Whoever held the Conch had the authority to speak and controlled the group for as long as they possessed the shell. In this context, whoever holds The Conch (i.e. the TV remote) has the power to flip through channels and decide what everyone in the room will be watching on TV.

e.g., Pat had control of the conch and I was forced to watch reruns of COPS all night.

submitted by Stephanie

conchquistador - A champion gatherer or harvester of conch. In honor of my deceased friend, Don Mintz, who coined the word. Pronounced the same as "conquistador."

e.g., Once Don, sailing in the Bahamas, acquired a taste for conch he became a conchquistador.

submitted by Frank J. Mandriota

conciliatorious - To act as if you have just saved the world by meerly talking to a few people

e.g., "He's quite conciliatorious, isn't he?" "Yeah. Comes with the job."

submitted by

concluscious - To be luscious because of intelligence.

e.g., You wrote an award winning paper on supersymmetry? A Nobel Prize, too? You're so concluscious.

submitted by danica & pinder

concoction - When a heterosexual prisoner shuns homosexual advances.

e.g., Listen, Mugsy! We're just cellmates - nothing more. And please . . . don't take my concoction personally.

submitted by Joe Kreiter - (www)

concraption - A device designed to save time, but instead consumes it.

e.g., I'll fax the report to you tomorrow, if I can figure out this concraption.

submitted by Brent Kesler

concrapulations - A sarcastic way of saying congratulations.

e.g., Well, concrapulations to you on your new promotion.

submitted by Ryan

concreightor - Someone who ate concrete for some unfortunate circumstance.

e.g., Billy is a concreightor, surfing is his passion.

submitted by Eloy

concrete poisoning - What you die from when you throw yourself off a high building and land in the street.

e.g., "Looks like a case of concrete poisoning," Detective Finney said, looking up at the ledge, then down at the corpse.

submitted by Deacon

concretiate - To solidify.

e.g., In order to concretiate the facts, the detective did further investigating.

submitted by Michael Naujunas

concretize - The process of turning all of the greenspace on the planet into parking lots, sidewalks, and roads.

e.g., The developers are slowly concretizing the grass in front of the library because people will take shortcuts across the lawn.

submitted by Rhett Bryson - (www)

condementia - A mental illness. Condementia is a two stage disease. The first part being an uncontrollable collecting of condiments and the second the constant and irrational use of such.

e.g., Her condimentia was made apparent when I opened her cupboard to find she had seven different kinds of tomato sauce. I watched in dismay as he proceeded to coat an otherwise perfect pizza slice in the most awful array of sauces. It was the most severe case of condementia I had ever seen.

submitted by Wefneck

condiddle - A real word. We usually don't accept synonyms for stealing, but this is the kind of word we occasionally make an exception for. You're not going to find condiddle in most real dictionaries, which is reason enough for us to add it. You can find last-gasp words such as this in dialect dictionaries and other specialty dictionaries.  
The Routledge Dictionary of Historical Slang: "condiddle | To purloin, steal: coll; ca 1740–1860; extant in dial., where it arose. Scott in St Ronan’s Well, ‘Twig the old connoisseur . . . condiddling the drawing.’ Ex DIDDLE, a, and to, cheat." || Merriam-Webster online says: dial Brit | transitive verb | : to make away with secretly : steal, waste.

e.g., "You tell me what happened to it, officer. I've had my '63 Merc on blocks in my garage. Shrink-wrapped, more or less, these last 45 years. Now it's gone. I was countin’ on selling it to supplement my retirement income -- after taking it on one last cross-country trek. I noticed it was missin' when I got up Sunday mornin'." "Well, sir, I'd say your car was condiddled about three o'clock Sunday morning, the usual car condiddlin' time in these here parts. We'll be on the lookout for it on eBay. We've seen a lot of that happenin' in Scottsdale the last several months." "Hmmm, then why don't you shut down the car theft ring?" "Intend to . . . as soon as we have enough evidence for a conviction."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

condimentarian - Condiment connoisseur.

e.g., Being a condimentarian, he could not enjoy his steak without a variety of steak sauces to choose from.

submitted by M Hedges

condimentia - Deterioration of intellectual faculties, such as memory, concentration, and judgment, specifically relating to condiments. Not to be confused with condomentia -- where your boyfriend forgets to put on his safe.

e.g., John keeps forgetting where he's put the ketchup. I think he has condimentia.

submitted by Laba

condimentia - Being unable to distinguish the salt from the pepper.

e.g., Severe condimentia was robbing him of the spice of life.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

condolence - Faking an active lifestyle (outdolence) while actually being indolent.

e.g., He was living a life of condolence, pretending he climbed mountains, ran long distances, and generally avoiding strenuous things.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

condominimum - A condom for the short: small condoms. Coined with this meaning ~1982. The word is obvious for referring to a minimum-sized condominium. A word for a wee version of Condoleeza Rice: condiminimum.

e.g., Midget to druggist: Do you sell condominimums here?

submitted by HD Fowler

condoring - Hitting the volleyball very high .

e.g., Why do you keep condoring the ball into the trees?

submitted by Connor

conduicy - (Rhymes with JOHN-glue-ih-see; n.) 1. The quality or state of being a conduit, especially 2. The nature of a person serving as a guide or an intermediary. 3. A mother's ability to bring people into the world. [From Latin con 'with' + ducere 'lead.']

e.g., The television, and now the computer, are paradigmatic examples of conduicy, being as they are mediating devices used by those with information to inform those who don't have such information. | On Mother's day, we celebrate our mothers' conduicy on our behalf.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

cone - (v.) 1. To surround, outline, or close off with (usually orange) traffic cones so as to block public entry because the area surrounded, outlined, or closed off because it is under construction, under investigation, under attack, undermined by sinkholes, under the control of psychotics, under consideration for preservation or condemnation, or whatever.

e.g., "I can't find a way out of the mall parking lot; it's all been coned." "Well, fortunately, the mall has restaurants. We'll survive."

submitted by sScott M. Ellsworth - (www)

cone computer - A bunch of crunched-up pieces of an ice cream cone sticking out of an ice cream cone. So called a cone computer because the ice cream cone looks like the computer tower, and the cone bits look like little computer chips.

e.g., I tricked my brother into thinking that I bought him a new computer. When he looked at it, he freaked out. I had just given him a snack; a cone computer.

submitted by Star651

cone zone - What Conan O'Brien (Late Night with Conan O'Brien) calls the portion of the stage he uses for his opening monologue.

e.g., Careful, you're about to drift into the cone zone.

submitted by adipex

coneheads - Typically, the passengers or guests on a cruise ship. So named because of their penchant to consume mass quantities' of alcohol, and then act crazy. From the movie The Coneheads, with Dan Ackroyd and Jane Curtin.

e.g., Bartender on cruise ship: You wouldn't believe what those coneheads are up to tonight. Entertainment Director: I think I'll grab my videocam and film them for the day-by-day video diary.

submitted by Paul

coner - Mildly derogatory term for submarine crewmen who work in the forward compartments, and who are not nuclear-trained technicians.

e.g., See if one of the coners can find a wrench for you.

submitted by Varrick Nunez

cones - Drivers of vehicles that are widely spaced and moving at or below the roadway's posted speed limit.

e.g., I had to pass a bunch of cones back there before I could catch up with you.

submitted by g. white

confab - Corporate speak for "to meet." Can also be used more casually.

e.g., Hey, let's confab out in the parking lot and smoke a couple of cigs.

submitted by Paul

confabulate - To tell a story that is false, while the author starts to believe that it is true, in order to appear more convincing to everyone else.

e.g., My friend always has to confabulate when he meets new people, especially after a few drinks. Confabulating is quite common when men try to pick up women.

submitted by Toulina

confarbled - 1. Messed up. 2. Tangled.

e.g., 1. Our computer system is down because some hacker confarbled the server over the weekend. 2. Ack! These stupid audio cables are confarbled again.

submitted by Mike Halchin - (www)

confetto - (n.) 1. one piece of confetti: a sparkle, a streamer, a bit of paper; 2. a really small celebration. (From the Italian.)

e.g., "What's this strip of paper? Hey! is someone shredding our records?!" "Nah, it's just a confetto from the party we had last week." | Sure, you're important: look, we can have a celebration; I'll throw a confetto and everything.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

confidentiality trap - Any website, chain letter, e-mail, or other form that seems innocent but tricks you into giving away personal, embarrassing, or otherwise stupid information to an individual, usually the one you got linked to the site by.

e.g., AARGH! Kelsey lured me into a confidentiality trap. Now she knows that I have a crush on Danielle.

submitted by Mobius Paradox

confidentulous - To make a conversation feel extremely safe from eavesdroppers.

e.g., Don't worry, this is confidentulous.

submitted by lost

confignant - Confused and ignorant.

e.g., If you apperar to be confignant, expect the other kids to make fun of you. Especially if you're always slow about discovering things.

submitted by Beej - (www)

conflagration - An allowance made to prisoners to display national banners.

e.g., The warden strictly limited the conflagration to one flag per con.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

conflama - Mixture of conflict and drama. Usually involving juicy gossip.

e.g., So much conflama tonight. Lester opened the closet door and found his girlfriend in there ... with someone else.

submitted by Kate - (www)

conflection - conflicted reflection

e.g., After his girlfriend dumped him, Josh spent the night in conflection trying to decide where he had gone wrong.

submitted by Spidey

confliction - A conflict of information.

e.g., When the paper said the concert was at eight but the website said it was at seven, there was a confliction.

submitted by David Rubin

conflictogism - A statement that contains in itself a contradiction or violation of what is being said. {ED. Not to be confused with a conflictorgasm.}

e.g., When you said, "I'm just a fallible mortal and will never make the mistake of forgetting that," wasn't that a conflictogism of sorts? | "I never use bad words and I challenge any of you bastards to catch me at it." "Caught you in a conflictogism, didn't I, Erle." | "My son is not illegitimate. His father and I were married three months after he was born." "I'm giving you a conflictogism flag for that one, Sharon."

  • {ED. If a woman is married at the time she gives birth, but not to the biological father of the child, is the child a bastard? Inquiring minds want to know.}

    submitted by Steve McDonald

    conflummoxed - Being confused by your own actions.

    e.g., I was too conflummoxed afterwards to be able to explain why I did it. Still don't know. More or less just a bad case of the stupids.

    submitted by James Tague - (www)

    conflustered - An emotional state, feelings of both confusion and agitation.

    e.g., Presented with the overwhelming variety offered by the menu, Mark became conflustered and rushed out of the restaurant.

    submitted by Big Daddy

    confoodled - The condition of utter confusion caused when one's noodle is full of immaterial stuff.

    e.g., I was confoodled when I read the directions for submitting an entry to this website because my noodle was already thinking about things I should have been doing instead.

    submitted by D. S. Tuxhorn

    confoozled - Confused and bamboozled.

    e.g., This problem is hard. I'm confoozled.

    submitted by Kristy

    confoozled - Extremely confused.

    e.g., I get so confoozled sometimes. Do the shoes go on your hands or your feet?

    submitted by EggieChan

    confrase - To confuse or mix common sayings or phrases.

    e.g., Diane: "You're as cool as a cocoanut." Anthony: "I wish you wouldn't confrase things. It's "cool as a cucumber." "Make like a tree and get out of here." - Young Biff, from Back to the Future II.

    submitted by Mossy

    confrazzled - Confused and frazzled.

    e.g., I can't finish my trigonometry homework. I'm so confrazzled.

    submitted by Nicole - (www)

    confrustipation - Mental or physical paralysis caused by a combined state of confusion and frustration, resulting complete lack of productive output.

    e.g., Getting his story published finally allowed Boutros to break through his confrustipation, thus ending his long struggle with writer's block.

    submitted by Buzz Voelker - (www)

    confrustrated - Being both confused and frustrated at the same time.

    e.g., After this morning's class I was confrustrated about what to do.

    submitted by James Lainton

    confuct - Of a situation where everything that could go wrong is going wrong: everything is messed-up.

    e.g., Romeo took his life, leaving Juiet confuct.

    submitted by JB

    confuddled - Very confused.

    e.g., This whole mess has left me confuddled.

    submitted by Metal Girl - (www)

    confudeled - Confused.

    e.g., I went into math class confudeled and came out the same way. Maybe more so.

    submitted by Miranda Card

    confudlepate - To confuse.

    e.g., When the teacher tried to explain the algebra equation, I became confuddlepated and didn't understand what she meant.

    submitted by Carrie - (www)

    confugal, confugality - Problematic, problems.

    e.g., A child custody dispute added confugality to the divorce proceedings.

    submitted by mike ward - (www)

    confugure - To unintentionally configure something so it doesn't work.

    e.g., Ralph really confugured his computer. It won't even boot.

    submitted by Scott Monster - (www)

    confuncled - When clothing is rucked up and twisted around.

    e.g., "My jumper was all confuncled." "Jumper? Isn't that some equestrian term?"

    submitted by Jane Rodgers

    confunderstood - A mix between being missunderstood and confused, first used by buddies Nick and Matt.

    e.g., Yes I know I am confunderstood.

    submitted by jillian

    confurious - A cross between confused and curious, like when someone is trying to tell you something but can't remember how they want to say it and you want to know what it is.

    e.g., "Come on, Micky! Spit it out, you've got me confurious!" said Kristin when Micky couldn't get to the point of his story.

    submitted by Kristin D. (Tallon) - (www)

    confusalated - For a state of mass confusion.

    e.g., After his explanation I was more confusalated than ever.

    submitted by Jacqueline

    confusative - When learning grammar, there are three main cases to consider, accusative, dative, and confusative.

    e.g., I have no idea if this sentence is in the dative or accusative, so I'll just use confusative, because grammar is all a bit beyond me really.

    submitted by Jacq

    confusatory - Use this when you're so confused, you don't even know what adjective you're looking for.

    e.g., Math boggled them; they found it very confusatory.

    submitted by Elizabeth

    confuscate - Combines confuse and obfuscate to mean deliberately confusing and obscured -- usually for nefarious reasons.

    e.g., That Web site confuscated the results so that the client couldn't tell if the campaign was successful or not.

    submitted by Dominic Tassone - (www)

    confuse - To join, weld, fuse together. Also a means of igniting confidence men or convicts.

    e.g., He lit the confuse and the ensuing blast melded the cons. Their remains were put in a container.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    confusement - A synapse lapse, when neurons in your brain don't connect properly, leaving you unable to form complete and rational statements.

    e.g., Sorry, there seems to be some confusement.

    submitted by Pig Pen

    confusement - The reaction to receiving conflicting information or instructions.

    e.g., I was told to hurry up without concern to a timetable. This caused confusement on my part.

    submitted by Rick Rapp

    confusenik - 1. Loony liberal left. 2. Cause groupies. 3. Anti-anti-terrorism protesters. 4. Has-been Marxist-Leninists. 5. Powerless protesters. 6. Protesting mental midgets. 7. Disaffected dupes. 8. Political pawns or patsies.

    e.g., Not ever having been touched personally by real difficulties in life, the confuseniks were able to run rampant with their anti-Bush protests.

    submitted by Jack Vanderloo

    confusiasm - Also confusiastic, confusiastically. When a person is always confused and stupid, he/she is confusiastic. There are three kinds of confusiasm: Stupid confusiasm, Comic confusiasm, and Deliberate Confusiasm.

    e.g., Sheena is confusiastic because she's always saying stupid things and asking "What?" Von is confusiastic because he'll go up to you and say "Mmmzzznrhamanerang" just cause it's funny. Emmanuel is confusiastic because he acts stupid to be cool.

    submitted by BigAssFries

    confusiastic - One unknowingly confused, and enthusiastic about what is thought (mistakenly) to be understood.

    e.g., Jeff is confusiastic about ... oh, lots of things.

    submitted by Jeff Collins

    confusible - Misspelling of "confusable."

    e.g., Confusible is confusable with confusible.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    confusicated - Confused.

    e.g., After three hours of studying partial differental equations, Bryan was still as confusicated as ever.

    submitted by Froggee285

    confusled - A word taken from Winnie The Pooh that means, essentially, being confused--but sounds a whole lot cooler than plain ol' confused.

    e.g., Heffalumps and woozles, are very confusled, because they come in every shape and size.

    submitted by Tara

    confuslicated - Mix of confused and complicated.

    e.g., This problem is so hard I'm hopelessly confuslicated.

    submitted by noel ballantine

    confussed - Concussed, confused, and counfounded combination. See also: bad spelling.

    e.g., Maybe I'm an idiot. I'm confussed. Please e-mail me to get this straightened out. Or, maybe the problem is that you don't express yourself clearly?

    submitted by Tzarius - (www)

    confust - When at work and one is confused, frustrated, and needs to swear.

    e.g., Upon receiving the finished prototype for testing, I was confusted because it looked nothing like my detailed specs.

    submitted by Stacy

    confusted - To feel embarrassed, weirded out, and confused -- all at the same time.

    e.g., Sally felt confusted after she misunderstood Mark.

    submitted by Dustin Burnett - (www)

    confusticate | confusticated - Orig: Tolkien. Apparently a contraction of "confuse" and "frustrate," often used as a very mild curse to place upon someone who has vexed you. | To be extremely confused.

    {ED. Having run across these again and combined them into a single entry in the lexicon, I've noticed something I glossed over initially. Not to rain on Clownburner's parade or dispute her etymology, but I've never heard either "confuse you" or "frustrate you" used as imprecations. However, I have heard "confound you" used that way. So, I'm going for the source word for the curse sense of confusticate as being confound rather than confuse. If, that is, if confusticate has been established previously in the sense of a curse. Q.E.D.}

    e.g., Confusticate him, he put my sneakers in the icebox again. | Wait, so you met a holabawho in holabawhatsville? I am so confusticated.

    submitted by Clownburner | Erib

    confusticated - To be extremely confused.

    e.g., Wait, so you met a holabawho in holabawhatsville? I am so confusticated.

    submitted by Erin

    confustication - Confusion, frustration.

    e.g., OMG, we have a Spanish test next period. I didn't study at all, and I dont understand a thing. Aaaggghh! The confustication.

    submitted by jesi

    confustrigated - Confused, disgusted, and agitated or irritated.

    e.g., This new computer program has the whole office completely confustrigated.

    submitted by Lorna

    confuzzled - Confused and puzzled at the same time. | Confused.

    e.g., That game confuzzled me no end. | The confuzzled student tried to solve the confuzzling math problem.

    submitted by Sera | Jeff

    confuzzling - A mix of confused and puzzling.

    e.g., This mathematical problem is very confuzzling.

    submitted by annabelle

    congagulations - Gushing laudations, insincere to the point of choking.

    e.g., His congagulations to the newlyweds were quite cheery, nevermind that he almost lost his lunch.

    submitted by Froo-froo

    congalescence - The period, during which the body recovers from a serious illness, injury or surgery, resulting from learning to dance the Conga.

    e.g., I hope my congalescence doesn't take too long.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

    congealatin - The usually clear congealed gelatinous material formed from the juices of, and often found clinging to leftover meats in a refrigerator, such as ham or turkey leftovers.

    e.g., A few seconds in a microwave oven will usually free a serving of leftover meat from the disgusting globs of congealatin that formed on it overnight in the refrigerator.

    submitted by Dave Violette

    congelitude - A sticky or slimy congealment

    e.g., She was sick over the train window and the sun baked it into an unsavoury congelitude.

    submitted by Colin Taffel

    congrats - What Paul and Garret and everyone else should receive for getting 10,000 fictitious words.

    e.g., Congrats to everybody on your accomplishment of 10,000 words.

    submitted by Brandon Ducharme

    congre gape - The act of gathering together in a crowd to be fascinated by the ongoing events at an accident, or at a similarly unusual event.

    e.g., While driving by the burning, overturned tractor trailer, I had to really slow down to avoid hitting those who had come to congre gape.

    submitted by charlie lesko

    congrolences - To congratulate a person with his new "whatever" and a sad feeling for the person at the same time.

    e.g., I hear you were called to be the new scoutmaster. My congrolences.

    submitted by Joey Anderson

    congrouchulations - Used when giving folks insincere good wishes when something special or pleasant happens to them.

    e.g., Sure he commended me on winning the sales award, but -- you could tell by his tone that he was actually offering congrouchulations -- NOT congratulations.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

    conjufusion - The fusion and confusion of tenses when conjugating verbs. Has nothing to do with conjugal visits.

    e.g., I have difficulty following Hubie Brown because of conjufusion.

    submitted by Oirad Zitro

    conjunck - The guy in the movie theater who has a laser pointer and keeps pointing it at the movie screen.

    e.g., That idiot at the movie theater was a conjunck.

    submitted by Squackle! - (www)

    conker - "A 'conker' is a horse chestnut. A 'spanner' is a wrench." (Check the link for the British English Quiz in the "Links for Word Lovers.")

    e.g., Do not confuse a conker with an hors d'oeuvre. | If you cut your finger in England, bandage it with  
    a conker?
    a spanner?
    a plaster?

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    conmerging - Merging and converging used together in one word: Merging and converging conmerged.

    e.g., The traffic was conmerging on the freeway.

    submitted by penny

    connect four - Solving a friend's problem by putting all the pieces in order and solving all the loose ends.

    e.g., Albert's house was on fire, his cat had to have surgery and he needed $5000. So needless to say I pulled a Connect Four and he is all right now.

    submitted by natmac

    connectamazoink - A certain ambiguous something used to connect something to something else.

    e.g., "Get the connectamazoink," he said after dropping the vase.

    submitted by matthew salernonononono

    connectholic - A person who needs to be connected with others all the time.

    e.g., I'm a connectholic because I need to be connected on internet, all the time.

    submitted by Milagros - (www)

    connectholic - A person who needs to be connected with others all the time.

    e.g., I'm a connectholic because I need to be connected on internet, all the time.

    submitted by Milagros - (www)

    connection-fit - A tantrum that comes from being unable to connect with someone or something.

    e.g., Rejected by the wall socket, the plug had a connection-fit.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

    connectorize - Applying the appropriate connectors to network cabling. Includes both copper and fiber types.

    e.g., Please connectorize the remaining cables in the wiring closet.

    submitted by Richard Roller

    conniptia - Behavior that shows that you are suddenly very angry, upset, etc. Someone who is having a conniption fit is in a state of conniptia.

    e.g., He was thrown into a state of conniptia when his favorite TV program was preempted by a political speech.

    submitted by Carl Borrowman - (www)

    conpuzzle - A baffling quality of having such confusion as completely frustrates or bothers one's mind

    e.g., He was conpuzzled by the direction the tree grew.

    submitted by Cameron Lundy - (www)

    conquished - Conquered and vanquished.

    e.g., We have conquished our oppressors.

    submitted by Rheinholdt Tzarius

    conquist adore - A type of suave, male con artist who preys on gullible, lonely women, romances them, takes all their money, and tosses them a kiss as he exits out of their lives.

    e.g., Martha's heartbeat hadn't stopped racing for the past three months since she met Carlos in an internet dating service for seniors. He was a wealthy, retired businessman who moved to America from Venezuela a year ago.

    It had all happened so fast; their e-mails, then phone calls, and -- his insistence on meeting her, when she immediately "knew" that this virile, tall, handsome, graying at the temples Latino was the one she had been waiting for all these years. How fortunate she was that he had instantly fallen in love with her, too!

    Carlos was from a noble family. He said that he had the heart, soul, and blood of a "Conquist adore." To Martha, he was her Don Juan, her knight in shining armor.

    They would marry soon, but first, Carlos had to return to Venezuela to claim a family inheritance. There was a minor, temporary problem where Carlos needed $25,000 in cash for the lawyers and he couldn't touch the incoming investments until the papers were signed. But that was easily settled when Martha lent him $19,000, all she had in her credit union savings account, and she took the balance from her Visa credit card.

    Through the airport gate, Carlos turned back and looked at her with his glowing, deep, dark brown eyes. "I will return soon to you, my darling!" he said, "I love you -- Vaya con Dios." He took a kiss from his lips with his fingertips and threw it out, oh so gently, to her.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    cons - Cons are also called chucks and they're really Chuck Taylor Converse All Stars. Used mainly by people who wear them, or people who want them.

    e.g., Nice Cons. I didn't know they came in zebra stripes.

    submitted by Rockychic66

    consarct - To misinform without "technically" telling a lie.

    e.g., I knew she was being consarctive when she wouldn't go out with me because she had to wash her hair.Everyone needs to wash their hair, but she didn't have to do it right then. | "I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms Lewinski," President Clinton said consarctly. | The masterpiece of consarction: "Counsel is fully aware that Ms. Lewinsky has filed -- has an affidavit, which they are in possession of, saying that there IS absolutely no sex of any kind in any manner, shape or form with President Clinton."

    submitted by Joe Gloor

    consaywa - Corner store. Mostly used for a deli on a corner.

    e.g., I have to go to the connsaywa to buy candy.

    submitted by Bob

    consense - Having sufficent common sense to avoid being taken in by con artists and their scams. Having sufficent common sense to avoid being taken in by the Nigerian Oil Scam and its many variations.

    e.g., Fortunately I've used enough consense to keep the scam artists from reaching my real e-mail address. (I use and never give out my real e-mail address. Or my real name.)

    submitted by Miss Speller

    consense - To put an opinion to a group of people with an aim to gain consensus.

    e.g., Conduct round table discussions to consense all escalation items.

    submitted by Williams / Cathcart - (www)

    consenstipation - For the times when a customer decides by consensus whether each phase of a project is acceptable.

    e.g., Even though the idea was fresh and creative it suffered from consentipation.

    submitted by al fink

    consensuous - Hybrid of consensual and sensuous.

    e.g., Her passionate kiss indicated a move toward a consenuous situation.

    submitted by bad_st - (www)

    consent tration - The act of a person who focuses his mind and will on convincing another person to agree with him or to do his bidding.

    e.g., Okay, Sweetie, close your eyes and listen to me. Let's get our minds involved with consent tration. Even though I'm ugly and you say you hate me, our minds keep telling us that you love me. It's true, isn't it Sweetie? You really love me, don't you, Sweetie? Your mind keeps telling you that you do love me,doesn't it, Sweetie? Sweetie?

    submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

    conservability - Being of the nature to be conserved, able to be conserved.

    e.g., This experiment had the purpose of discovering ideas about the conservability of energy and matter.

    submitted by Hadiran

    conservia - A utopian-styled society in which conservation efforts have gone to extremes. There is no pollution and no alcohol, killing animals for food is strictly outlawed, and nothing at all goes to waste. Even human bodies are recycled instead of being buried.

    e.g., Conservia is utopia gone all wrong. They throw out the steak and eat their dead instead, and then call us sick.

    submitted by Lord Argent - (www)

    consistentpatience - When you are constipated you need consistent patience on the toilet. Consistipatience, constipatience.

    e.g., I tried and tried to defecate and had to use consistent patience to finally have a bowel movement. {ED. TMI, Frank, but the editors are in a generous mood today.

    submitted by Frank - (www)

    consistify - To make things more consistent.

    e.g., Please consistify that cookie batter.

    submitted by Sean McComas

    consolent - The form of humor commonly referred to as sarcasm, but without the negative connotation.

    e.g., "You know I'm always early, so when you told me to not be late you were being consolent weren't you?"

    submitted by Jeff Jones

    consolidiction - Combining two or more terms into a single compound word.

    e.g., Experts agree: the daily use of consolidiction reduces your tendencies toward verbosity, prolixity, and filibusteriousness.

    submitted by Christopher Paul Schoonover

    conspicious - Conspicuous (obvious) and suspicious. Not inconspicuous (hidden) or not innocent-looking.

    e.g., That woman in the dark hat looks conspicious to me.

    submitted by Blake

    conspirience - A feeling or condition resulting from the suspicion that others are conspiring against you.

    e.g., The other day I thought my friends were planning to steal something from me. It was an awful conspirience.

    submitted by Will Fenton

    consquiggled - Very confused, as though your thoughts are not traveling straight.

    e.g., He looked consquiggled by the word his friend made up.

    submitted by Jake Gold

    constancy - A lathargic feeling, caused by a boring or repetitive activity, usually over a long period of time. This feeling is generally brought on by full-time work or full-time study. It can also be caused by repeating the same activity a number of times in one day. This feeling is less associated with true irritability, and more associated with begrudging acceptance of one's lot in life. ("Constance where appropriate)

    e.g., The constance of working in the same civil servant position for 36 years caused George to grow into a depressed loner, who came off us a lovable loser. OR "How can you possibly stand working in the same civil servant position for so long? Isn't the constancy killing you?" Mary asked George. "It's a living," George replied. "Not much of one," Mary muttered as she walked away.

    submitted by Adam

    constantaneous - Appearing or occuring and then continuing without a pause or break.

    e.g., The throbbing pain in my head has been constantaneous since last night.

    submitted by Grant Hutchinson - (www)

    constanzanomics - Making money by acting against every instinct.

    e.g., The market's so volatile and confusing, I've resorted to constanzanomics: I sell when every instinct tells me to buy and buy when every instinct tells me to sell.

    submitted by sam

    constellation - The practice of naming stars after prisoners who try escape via teleportation.

    e.g., He screamed, "Beam me up, Scotty; I'll risk incomplete consubstantiation rather than stay in this jug any longer." It didn't work out and constellation assure his immortality. You might say it was his star performance.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    constern - The state of being full of consternation.

    e.g., He was consterned about the activities of the board.

    submitted by Sherry Oake

    consterned - Consternated. Filled with consternation, in the limited sense of being bewildered, but with little or no feeling of confusion or dread. Back formation.

    e.g., When I told her I liked the article and thought it was clever as well as funny, she responded so negatively I was consterned.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    constipation officer - An anal-retentive conservation officer -- park ranger.

    e.g., That ranger was severely ticked off when he saw us having a beer by the camp fire. He's obviously a constipation officer.

    submitted by C.

    constitutents - Where many of obama's constituents may end up living if he's re-elected without getting the economy moving. From a ytop in the Quipping Queen's clever dogumentarian example.  
    Has anyone considered how many folks may go on the government dole when a million or more Dreamers get added to the rolls of those who can be legally employed? Not that they'll be on the dole themselves (?), but some of them could well displace citizens or other legal residents who are currently gainfully employed. I wonder if Immigration Services will slow down the processing of Dreamers' requests for work permits to make sure the unemployment numbers don't spike up before the presidential election? A deliberate slow down may not be necessary, given that an estimated 1,400 full-time employess, as well as contractors, are estimated to be necessary to process more than 3,000 request for work permits a day for the first year obama's new vote-getting program is in operation. {ED. The Shadow knows.}

    e.g., Yeh, I'm afraid the bank's going to foreclose on us and there's not a damned thing I know to do about it. I thought voting for obama was going to put me in high clover, but it looks as if it's going to put me in a constitutent.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    constriguous - For something that sounds very complicated but has simple explanation.

    e.g., Calculus is constriguous.

    submitted by peter

    construcruciation - A road construction project that snarls up traffic indefinitely, whilst producing no apparent improvements to the road. By transference, the resulting traffic jam.

    e.g., The Highway Department moves the construcruciation on I-95 in response to rush-hour traffic: they construcruciate the side with the greatest traffic flow.

    submitted by Amanda Faulkenberry - (www)

    constructification - A significant amount of construction work.

    e.g., Wow, there's a lot of constructification going on for the new freeway.

    submitted by Brett Looney - (www)

    construction screws - Supervisors, managers, and project planners responsible for ineptly run "improvement" projects that keep highways and streets torn up much longer than necessary.

    e.g., The construction screws are responsible for this travesty.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    consubstantiation - Materializing a prisoner after she escapes by teleportation.

    e.g., Beam me up, Scotty; I'll risk incomplete consubstantiation rather than stay in this jug any longer.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    consumercide - Consumerism as a cause of death. Death of the individual (~suicide) or others (~homicide) or even the entire planet in general, through an excess of the combination of affluenza and ignorance. Consumercide is elaborated upon in detail at Coined by the webmaster as a "mental furball" circa 1994.

    e.g., The heinous erection of unsightly shopping malls (mauls) over most of the planet's surface preyed upon the consumercidal urges of the wayward populace. It was the age of the reign of Consumercide, and the lethal toll taken by such ignorance nearly destroyed the whole biosphere.

    submitted by michael - (www)

    contage - Functions as "caught" or "catching," depending on use. Can be applied to any item that can be considered contagious, whether physical or non-contagious. Ex: yawning, illnesses or diseases, smiles, songs stuck in someone's head, etc.

    e.g., Jenny had yawned, and as a result of being tired as well, Johnny contaged the gesture shortly after. | I just know if I go to visit Sarah with her cold I'm gonna contage that in a hearbeat.

    submitted by codex obsidian - (www)

    contage - (Pronounced to rhyme with "one-PAGE"; v.) 1. To pass on a communicable disease; 2. to spread an infection. [Back formation from "contagion."] {Duplicate.}

    e.g., I have MRSA in my infected foot; and I've been told to be very careful so as not to spread the bacteria. Unfortunately, I don't know how this contagion contages.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    contailed - (attrib. adj.) (kuhn-TAILD) Simple, straightforward, obvious, basic, easy to read. (Etymology: Opposite of detailed, by analogy with construction/destruction.)

    e.g., The English teacher left us with contailed instructions on how to complete our essay and how to quote a phrase from the novel.

    submitted by Mirakle B.

    container - Prison -- a place to house confidence men and other convicts.

    e.g., I hereby sentence you to ten years in the container.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    containter - Panties, knickers. Double entendre, having to do with taint.

    e.g., I'll just go to Wally's World to buy some new containters for my girlfriend. They're overpriced at Victoria's Secret and too cheap-looking from Frederick's of Hollywood.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    contarton - Container and carton.

    e.g., A loaf of bread, a contarton of milk, a stick of butter, and thou beside me in the wilderness...

    submitted by jimmy

    contentment - Canvas housing at Guantanamo.

    e.g., When the stockade ran out of cells, they resorted to contentment.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    contestor - One who enters contests, sweepstakes, competitions, lotteries, and raffles in order to win prizes.

    e.g., The contestors have filled in a lot of ballots for this promotion.

    submitted by Carolyn Wilman - (www)

    contheomnesy - The spiritual level of somebody who in hard situations or good times thinks and acts according to virtue, without any changes in her behavior.

    e.g., Popan is a special man because he acquired contheomnesy and in this way everything it s easier for him.

    submitted by Tatomir Ion Marius,poet

    contickulation - The pecular actions of a stressed cat such as chasing phantoms, meowing at nothing in particular, making noises with paper bags, and so forth.

    e.g., John's cat was going through major contickulations after eating catnip.

    submitted by Scott Marchus

    contiguum - A group of items that are touching or sharing boundaries.

    e.g., The lower 48 states constitute a contiguum.

    submitted by Knom

    continentality - Referring to one's continent of ethnic origin

    e.g., What is your continentality, Asian or African or maybe European?

    submitted by Adrian Faucette

    contirbute - To wilfully misinterpret somebody else's words in such a way as to inflict the maximum offence, ignoring the obviously intended original meaning. A technique often used to pick fights in relationships, the contirbuted meaning will be based on an illogical and tenuous chain of reasoning.

    e.g., Don't contirbute my words, you paranoid bastard.

    submitted by max beesley - (www)

    contr!mageddon - "Contr!mageddon" is not meant to alarm anyone or make light of the situation, but to highlight the cumulative troll effects and impacts that a series of pointless weather posts can have on a wide region.

    e.g., Holy Ramona, there's a hot-air filled Contr!mageddon moving across boards.

    submitted by tesssss

    contra diction ary, contradiction ary - 1. Contra diction ary -- a book to help the too highly literate learn how to slur their vocabulary and become more popular. 2. Contradiction ary -- a vocabulary book of phrases used by two- to three-year-olds.

    e.g., 1. Irwin wanted to be "one of the guys," so he bought a contra diction ary and practiced saying things like, "Wuzz up, Bro"? and "Wuffo, Dude!" -- Let's all have a moment of silence in memory of Irwin. 2. Carla's three-year-old brother's statements such as "I don't want to," "I don't have to," and "NO!" were enough to fill any contradiction ary.

    submitted by Machiavellean & . . . Lesko

    contra-disiac - Refers to special treatments which have the opposite effects of an aphrodisiac, rendering one temporarily invulnerable to the allures of the opposite sex--which can of course be a useful ploy upon occasion!

    e.g., "Roy! I need some help right now to deal with temptations...I need, you know, some contra-disiacs, man! In a hurry!" Roy: "Sorry, Clem. The only contra-disiac I have for you is a cold shower! Take it or leave it!"

    submitted by Dennis R. Ridley

    contrabanned - To be restricted access from something for the general good of everyone involved. (Attributed to A. Ressi.)

    e.g., You're contrabanned from your computer because you suck.

    submitted by Filip

    contrabilateral - Containing and juxtaposing two equal parts, with each part being the opposite of the other.

    e.g., I had a contrabilateral suit that I made myself. It was black on the left side, and white on the right.

    submitted by Ben Peters

    contractor whore - People who use contractors (or consultants) to get free things.

    e.g., She's a contractor whore -- she gets all the free tickets and mouse pads they have. Damn it. I wish she'd leave something for me.

    submitted by Lucinda

    contradox - Opposing opinion, minority opinion.

    e.g., I was not a popular speaker after I stated my contradox to the left-leaning audience.

    submitted by snowboardinghockeyplayer3 - (www)

    contrafibularities - Congratulations.

    e.g., I offer my most enthusiastic contrafibularities.

    submitted by Numfar

    contrafibularity - More than just a contradiction.

    e.g., That sandwich is a contrafibularity of the menu description.

    submitted by Chris Duddle

    contrail - Trace by which an escaped prisoner is tracked down.

    e.g., She'd been eating garlic, so the bloodhounds easily picked up her contrail.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    contrapreneur - "Someone who foolishly invests in a declining market. Coined by James Wesley Rawles."

    e.g., Am I deliberately investing in a declining market? Yes, I'm a contrapreneur -- except for the being foolish part. I'm selling short. (No, I'm not really doing that.) |  
    "Are Your Neighbors Contrapreneurs?": "The folks that bought 'spec houses at the top of the market are what I call contrapreneurs. They are holding an investment with steadily declining value. Most of them, sadly, used borrowed money to do so. Thus, not only are they riding a down escalator, but they must continue to service their debt on a house with a negative cash flow. Strapped for cash, many overextended themselves, and they are defaulting in alarmingly large numbers. Just as I predicted, some of them are starting to abandon their houses without so much as a fare-the-well to their bankers. This is a downright ugly situation. If the US economy noses down into recession (as I anticipate), with corporate layoffs intensifying the mortgage default numbers, then this could very well go down in history as a housing market collapse."

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    contrariwise - A peculiar word meaning to stand in the place of "on the contrary," with "wise" instead. Originally from Tweedledum and Tweedledee from Alice In Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass.

    e.g., "Contrariwise, if you think we're alive, you ought to speak." Tweedledee, Through the Looking Glass "Contrariwise, if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic." Tweedledee, Through the Looking Glass

    submitted by Jeremy - (www)

    contreglate - A circumstance that could throw off or invalidate an established rule or law due to its perceived inconsideration. v. to invalidate a law by pointing out its potential or active legitimate inconsideration.

    e.g., When the cafeteria lines are too long and the students have to go back to class before they could even get started to eat, their hunger seems like it should contreglate the "no eating in class" rule.

    submitted by MD Caruso

    contribulation - A gratuitous, willful. and usually malicious adding-on to one's suffering by another.

    e.g., Her soon-to-be ex just keeps piling on contribulations, delaying my eventual union with her. By "union," I mean to say that she refuses to have sex with me until her divorce is final.

    submitted by Giovanni

    contributress - A female-type person who cuts her long hair off for charity.

    e.g., The contibutress donates her hair, every time it grows out sufficiently, to Locks for Love or to St. Baldricks. Let's hair it for her!

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    contripofangospentaculating - What it's called when the person thinks very hard about going through her stuff and organizing it and throwing out the rubbish, but does not actually do it because it is too hard.

    e.g., I was going to organise my CD collection but I just wound up contripofangospentaculating about it. The result: no reduction in spherica.

    submitted by John Ilchef

    contronym - A word that can have opposite or contradictory meanings. {ED. Also contranym: "any word that can be its own antonym."}

    e.g., The word model is a contronym because it means both an exemplary as well as a copy.

    submitted by Joel Parker - (www)

    controverse - To engage in a dialogue or conversation involving disagreement or controversy.

    e.g., Donnie Brasco wanted to controverse with my friend about the quality of Brandy Ho's Hunan food.

    submitted by Hiroshi Wald, Opinion Group

    contuitive - "Counter-intuitive" is used to describe an unexpected research outcome. "Contuitive" slides more easily off one's tongue.

    e.g., That was definitely contuitive. I thought it was caused by eating bananas.

    submitted by Patrick Tynan

    contumacy - Con·tu·ma·cy: stubborn perverseness or rebelliousness; willful and obstinate resistance or disobedience to authority.

    e.g., If I had been in the military, I might well have spent more time behind bars than outside them because of my contumacy. I do not suffer fools gladly, especially fools who get off on trying to order me about.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    contumplate - Contemplate.

    e.g., I am contumplating getting a tattoo on the back of my neck. You know, like my hospice nurse has.

    submitted by Miss Speller for Jon Margera

    contz - To undo all of someone's contributions on a wiki, as a form of punishment for putting something on the wiki that goes against the guidelines. Usually applies to wikis that you can post to, even if you don't have an account. Used as a substitute for banning when one has no account. So called "contzing" because it's basically like Control-Z (contz), but, that is a misstatement because control-Z is not used on wikis. Still, contz is just slang.

    e.g., I am going to start up some sections on Uncyclopedia, and people can post pictures to the sections if they want. Softcore pornography may be allowed, but no hardcore at all. If they put one x-rated scene in there, I will go to edit history, and contz the user or IP.

    submitted by star651 - (www)

    conundrous - Of, or relating to, a conundrum. It's a real word.

    e.g., Chris was feeling particularly conundrous about who to take to the ball.

    submitted by epitomus - (www)

    conundrunk - A drunken riddle to which only a conjectural answer can be made.

    e.g., Arnie finally cracked the meaning of dog life, finally solving the conundrunk.

    submitted by quark - (www)

    conunkettledrum - A very troubling puzzle (enhanced version of conundrum, merely a troubling puzzle).

    e.g., As Ralph pondered his existence in light of 72nd level Chaotic Determinism, he realized that he faced an inextricable conunkettledrum.

    submitted by Mark Lee - (www)

    conurbation - "A large densely populated urban sprawl formed by the growth and coalescence of individual towns or cities." A portmanteau word that I've run across twice today. Wikipedia says "a conurbation is a polycentric urban agglomeration, in which transportation has developed to link areas to create a single urban labour market or travel to work area." Coined by Patrick Geddes in 1915.

    e.g., "We need candidates who know about laboratories, drones, trade cycles, and polychrome conurbations both here and overseas."

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    convagulations - A woman's way of congragulating a man.

    e.g., Martha convagulated Mike when he got a promotion at work.

    submitted by Marlie

    conveniences - Perverted interpersonal prison behavior.

    e.g., Cellblock 5 was noted for the conveniences that went on after lights out.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    convent shun all - The common and many locations where groups of nuns live and work, in retreat from the world.

    e.g., See that building with grape arbors and working fields? Don't bother going there -- it's convent shun all.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

    converpated - The feeling of having a lot to say, but being unable to say it.

    e.g., When Stan tried to explain to Susie why her house exploded, he found himself suddenly converpated.

    submitted by Delilah

    conversability - To be able to converse, to hold a conversation.

    e.g., I love talking to her -- she has great conversability.

    submitted by Fiona McKenney

    conversate - To talk with someone. | Converse. Perhaps a back-formation from conversation, although converse suffices more than adequately. Given its look, I think it's possible it came from conversant. From black American English, 1970-1975? Added to the fifth edition of The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language in 2011. Since I don't have my new copy of AHD yet, I don't know how it's treated.

    e.g., I really enjoyed conversating with you last night.

    submitted by Janet | HD Fowler

    conversatic - Chatty.

    e.g., You don't seem very conversatic, Cathy.

    submitted by Liam Callaghan

    conversation heart, c-heart - Pickup line that is really lame, or overused, like the ones on the candy hearts. It can also describe the user of the musty, rusty pickup lines.

    e.g., Jim is a conversation heart waiting to happen. He is soo inexperienced when it comes to dating.

    submitted by Cassie

    conversatory - A conservatory with intellectual pretentions of being a salon.

    e.g., The gathering found refuge from the rain and intellectual starvation in the conversatory.

    submitted by David Johnston - (www)

    conversion - A prisoner's story.

    e.g., There's the truth and then there's the conversion: "I'm innocent, I tells ya."

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    conversive - A new meaning for an existing word? Only slightly different from the archaic meaning: "ready to converse; social." Variation: able to actively participate in a conversation. Maybe you're not conversive because you don't want to say anything or maybe the other person hogs the floor and won't let you get a word in edgewise.

    e.g., She called to ask for my advice. I gave her the same good, sound advice I've been giving her for months. He's a married man; he's using you for booty call, nothing more; he's a serial cheater, at best; he's not going to change; break off your liaison with him -- and keep it broken off. She said she knew I'd say that, then went on a non-stop tear yelling and screaming at me for the next 10 minutes. I was not conversive during her harangue.

    Subject: check out conversive at
    Date: Sun, 10 Apr 2011 08:47:36 -0700
    From: God
    Reply-To: God
    To: Laura

    Listen up, Laura, God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\") (or someone pretending to be God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\")) has a word for you: conversive.

    conversive - A new meaning for an existing word: able to actively participate in a conversation. Maybe you're not conversive because you don't want to say anything or maybe the other person hogs the floor and won't let you get a word in edgewise.

    Example: She called to ask for my advice. I gave her the same good, sound advice I've been giving her for months. He's a married man; he's using you for booty call, nothing more; he's a serial cheater, at best; he's not going to change; break off your liaison with him -- and keep it broken off. She said she knew I'd say that, then went on a non-stop tear yelling and screaming at me for the next 10 minutes. I was not conversive during her harangue.

    Link to the word at,


    God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\") also has this to say to you:

    Stumbled across this in the PseudoDictionary today. The second paragraph paraphrases what Deanna said to me in one of our conversations. She wasn't sure "conversive" was an actual word, so I made it one. Sort of.

    Don't know about you, but there've been more than a few occasions in my life when I was not conversive during one of her harangues.

    Hope things are going well for you and yours. Things are going swimmingly for us, all things considered. Witch resumed chemotherapy for her multiple myeloma the first week in March. She's responded extremely well cancer-cell-wise to the treatment so far. The first four treatments reduced the cancer cell count in her bone marrow by close to 50%. Fingers crossed. Please say a prayer.

    Best wishes,



    God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\")

    God (note: has not been verified as belonging to God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\"). caveat emptor.)


    God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\") (or someone pretending to be God (i.e., \"Uncle Mike\")) asked us to send you this e-mail. If you have questions, e-mail

    submitted by [Deanna]

    converstation - A place where people meet to talk.

    e.g., Schlackel often exchanges useless information with pseudo-friends at the converstation next to the water cooler.

    submitted by Redbendad - (www)

    conviction - A prisoner's belief in her story.

    e.g., Sticking to the conversion: "I'm innocent, I tells ya" requires real conviction.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    convincerate - To convince someone, in a much more important way.

    e.g., Get over here and convincerate me otherwise.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    convincive - Synonym for convincing.

    e.g., I don't think I was very convincive with my argument.

    submitted by Myr Wilson

    convirons - An environment well-suited for conversation.

    e.g., I'd like to sometime, but I'd rather go to a place with better convirons than a noisy bar.

    submitted by Robbe Richman

    convivant - An unrelated person of either sex who cohabits with another. To give appropriate credit, this term was suggested by a gentleman on an NPR program about the inclusion of new words in the OED. It has the benefits of being derived from well-known Latin roots and being neither masculine nor feminine. Similar to paramour, but -- despite its similarity to bonvivant -- implies a more serious and perhaps long-term relationship. The legal system has been looking for such a term to describe what, with less gentility, is called a shackmate.

    e.g., The mother's convivant is 36, twice-divorced, and unemployed.

    submitted by David Fahey

    convivial - Happy prison life.

    e.g., Things in cellblock 6 were really convivial.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    convo - Abbreviation for conversation.

    e.g., Jodi and I had a convo about you yesterday.

    submitted by P. Bains

    convolutationism - The state of believing in convoluting things.

    e.g., He described the idea with a lot of needless convolutationism.

    submitted by Rowan GypsyFoot

    convoluvulous - A swirling coming together, a thing of blended beauty

    e.g., The convolvulous grain in the wood around the knothole is beautiful. My canoe was almost swamped in the convolvulous current where the two streams joined.

    submitted by Steve Marsh - (www)

    convoyeurism - The nighttime inclination to drive slightly behind and at the same speed as another vehicle equipped with a DVD player, in order to view the flip-down LCD screen through its windows.

    e.g., As soon as I saw Julie Andrews performing in the SUV next to me, I couldn't resist lapsing into a spell of convoyeurism that lasted until I had to exit the freeway.

    submitted by Daud Zoss

    conyetch - Certainly, of course, naturally, sure, that's right, precisely. (From the Russian, konyechny.)

    e.g., At one time some people used the slang term "natch," short for naturally to mean right, sure, yeah, I agree. At some time in the 21st century they started to use "conyetch" in a similar way .

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    coo' - A variation of cool; usually used when talking about something that's happened or will happen

    e.g., I can't wait till the party, it'll be so coo'. OR "That's coo'."

    submitted by Adam

    coochypigs - Woodlice.

    e.g., Kal screamed as she picked up the discarded bucket, "An infestation of coochypigs!"

    submitted by kal

    cooda - Fantastic, brilliant, awesome

    e.g., The pseudocictionary is cooda.

    submitted by Jennifer

    cooked - Ruined. What happens when an Mp3 is improperly ripped. An annoying hiccupping glitch noise in the song.

    e.g., Crap, this Mp3 is cooked.

    submitted by Toby

    cookie - The black paths left on a roadway after spinning the tires until they smoke, racing ahead at 80mph, then pulling the emergency brake and turning the wheel 90 degrees hard left. From above, the pattern is rounded, resembling a cookie.

    e.g., Now that I put a new engine in and racing slicks on my Camaro, we can go out and spin some cookies on Main Street.

    submitted by Nathan Hopper

    cookie roll - One of those little "donette" donuts that doesn't really have a hole (more of a navel on both sides), especially the powdery kind. Coined by a toddler attempting to ask for one. It was sweet and breadlike, so he called it a "cookie (sweet) roll (bread)."

    e.g., We've got cake, ice cream, soda pop, pie, cookies, and cookie rolls.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    cookienymer - One who knows the name of all cookies.

    e.g., The baker is somewhat of a cookienymer.

    submitted by Megan Clark

    cooking the favorite dish - Means to provide sexual satisfaction for someone.

    e.g., He's happy today. She cooked his favorite dish last night.

    submitted by Steve McDonald

    cooking-tele - A more exciting and original word for a run of the mill microwave.

    e.g., "Mum, wot's on the cooking-tele? "Custard, dear."

    submitted by treena

    cool - Meaningless word used by lazy British journalists to prefix any large amount of money.

    e.g., Last week, Mr. Smith won a cool million. And you can own the car for a cool hundred thousand.

    submitted by Adam Leslie

    cool bananas - Wicked, fantastic.

    e.g., I got the job. Cool bananas.

    submitted by Ra

    cool beans - Way too cool stuff.

    e.g., Cool beans garbanzo.

    submitted by souzos

    cool in the gang - Cool..

    e.g., Do you want to come to my house tonight? Yeah, cool in the gang.

    submitted by Victoria

    cool sore - A small cold sore.

    e.g., I got this gross cool sore on my lip. I hope people will think it's only a pimple.

    submitted by Bob Boarker

    cool-incidence - When two cool things happen at the same time.

    e.g., I won the lottery at the very same moment that I learned that I lost 20 lbs. What a Cool-incidence.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

    coolafied - Someone you just decided is cool has been coolafied.

    e.g., John has been coolafied.

    submitted by Ryan Crystal - (www)

    cooler - Guy whose luck is so monumentally awful that he's employed by a Las Vegas casino to bring bad luck to a hot gambler simply by brushing up against him.

    e.g., Bring the cooler down and put him on the geezer at the roulette wheel.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    coolfunky - Not just cool, not just funky.

    e.g., Coolfunky!

    submitted by Lisa Cirèlle Hansson - (www)

    coolie doolies - Alternative way of saying cool, more stylish,

    e.g., "Wanna go out?" "Yeah, coolie doolies." | "I'll be back in a sec." "Coolie doolies."

    submitted by marianne

    coolies - Evolved form of the word "cool" that is used usually as a reply to a statement.

    e.g., Statement: I just found $50 on the sidewalk. Reply: Coolies.

    submitted by Jason Haynes

    coolio - a person- preferably in their teens- who is beyond cool

    e.g., Rebekah is the most coolio kid in the school.

    submitted by Erin

    coolio g-mony - Cool, man.

    e.g., Well, all right, Coolio G-mony.

    submitted by Joelle

    coollike - To coollike is to hug a fridge. (Quote Charlie McDonnel.)

    e.g., Chris is coolliking.

    submitted by Aly Silverberg

    coolrunnings - "Everything is good" or "couldn't be better."

    e.g., "How's it going?" "Coolrunnings."

    submitted by serenity

    coolsumer - Someone who tries to buy coolness. A shopper who buys trendy products, especially those aimed at hipster or counterculture types.

    e.g., Did you see Ken buying all those Japanese noise CDs and Chris Ware comics? He's a coolsumer.

    submitted by James DiGiovanna - (www)

    coolth - Antonym of warmth.

    e.g., Yes, the air conditioner is working. Put your hand over the vent and feel the coolth.

    submitted by darms

    coom - The accidental misspelling of a URL resulting in the find of a more relative website. | A silence breaker, used during awkward silences.

    e.g., A great coom resulted in finding instead of when the new parents were shopping for their baby's first tricycle. | Angela and Michael couldn't think of anything else to say other than, "Coooom" in a soft, deep voice.

    submitted by Michael and Angela - (www)

    coonspiracy - A conspiracy, as carried out by raccoons. Heard about the Halloween prank of outhouse-tipping from my grandparents. They had a concrete walk going to their outhouse -- still there until I was about eight years old, but no longer used. They had a concrete cistern to collect rainwater for indoor use in the days before city water was piped in. The cistern was a cylinder about ten feet tall and ten feet in diameter. Its walls were about six to eight inches thick. In later years a door was blasted in it and shelves were built so it could be used to store home-grown potatoes. It doubled as a tornado shelter in case one was ever needed.

    e.g., "Given the way outhouses in my neighborhood have been getting tipped over lately, I have no doubt that it's the result of a coonspiracy that started last Halloween."

    submitted by Miss Speller

    coop - To get rid of evidence quickly.

    e.g., Quick, your mom's coming. Coop your cigarette.

    submitted by Muffinstein

    coopacornea - Old Australian spyglass used to spot approaching police or helpful abo's down under and up top as well

    e.g., My best mate still has one a those bonzer coopacorneas passed down from great-great-great grandparents -- our dingo likes to go fetch it

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    coopervision - The ability to see through barrels. (A cooper was a medieval barrelmaker.)

    e.g., Cheryl has coopervision. She saw right through that barrel. She also saw through my plans for our date. Rats.

    submitted by Chris Duddle

    coot - It's a cuter version of cute, what more needs to be said! To be used with young children, animals and basically anything else that makes you go oooooooo.

    e.g., Her: Why did you make it rainnnn? Me: Cause your hair goes all coot and curly in the rain.

    submitted by Pete Mattison

    cootchamuhtassi - (kootch-uh-muh-tas-ee) A saggy pimple.

    e.g., My teacher walked into class one day with a cootchamuhtassi on her face. | That is one humongous cootchamuhtassi you have on your butt, Chris. Eeewwww.

    submitted by Antwan

    cooth - Cooth may be from Shakespeare's time or thereabouts, and is equivalent to our modern "cool."

    e.g., William's plays are all so cooth. There is no comparison; they make us swoon and shake with merriment.

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    cop drop - The sly act of dropping your cel phone as soon as you see a cop so you don't get a ticket for talking while driving.

    e.g., Sorry, I had to cop drop you. | "What happened?" "Cop drop."

    submitted by Jen Lippman

    cop-trot - The speed to which everyone slows down while driving when they spot a police car.

    e.g., The cop car going the same way caused us all to do the cop-trot. We all drove 45 mph on the freeway.

    submitted by Mallard

    copacetic - Fine, excellent, going just right.

    e.g., Fred: How are you doing? Red: Copacetic.

    submitted by Ron Ray - (www)

    coparana - Dancing the Macarana "up against the wall and spread 'em."

    e.g., The dance floor went wild doing the coparana.

    submitted by Tim Ward

    copathetic - Opposite of copacetic, really lousy--in an rather pathetic way. All botched up.

    e.g., His inane use of words he didn't understand revealed that Doug's grasp of the language was copathetic.

    submitted by Dave Violette

    cope - As a noun: something good, something done well. As a verb:- to do something well

    e.g., Friday's soccer game was a cope. I coped that math exam.

    submitted by brown buffalo

    cope show - something done extremely well.

    e.g., That driving exam was a cope show.

    submitted by brown buffalo

    copiavita - Living an amazing abundant life, whether materially, physically or spiritually.

    e.g., He is overflowing with energy, joy, money, time to live the life he chooses, peace of mind and love - a classic case of copiavita.

    submitted by Peter Morgan - (www)

    copma - The kind of luck (good or bad) that you have with the cops. Similar to parkma.

    e.g., He's been pulled over six times since he moved here, and he's never gotten a ticket. That's some seriously good copma.

    submitted by Geo - (www)

    copophilia - (pronounced cop o' feel ya): The phenomenon of offering a police officer low level sexual favors in return for NOT writing a traffic ticket.

    e.g., The judge in traffic court found that I wasn't guilty of speeding, but fined me $300 for copophilia.

    submitted by Dana Friedman - (www)

    coprotopia - A social system that is utterly crappy.

    e.g., It dawned on John that he would never be able to get out of his shabby rental since he was stuck living in a dismal coprotopia.

    submitted by Mark Lee - (www)

    copsicle - A variety of security guard or officer riding some form of seemingly useless transportation. Good examples are college campus police in golf carts, mall security guards in little jeeps or police riding bicycles. Even funnier when they are the overweight variety.

    e.g., There was no way that chubby copsicle would catch up with the shoplifter, he couldn't pedal fast enough!

    submitted by Jillian

    copsicle - A poilce officer (or semi police personnel), usually a campus police officer, on a bicycle.

    e.g., The copsicle gave me a ticket. What is he going to do? Take me to jail in his basket?

    submitted by Dane Rauschenberg

    copter - An all-purpose term to replace slang terms with negative connotations. Can be used around people who are sensitive to such terms.

    e.g., Ed. I can't believe Chris cut you off after school, and then flipped YOU the bird. That's just copter. Ted. No, that's just Chris.

    submitted by Terry Johnson - (www)

    copulated - Not to be confused with the verb "copulated," this is an adjective much like "populated"-- used in reference to the number of police in a given area.

    e.g., I wouldn't speed too much along that section of highway because the area is heavily copulated.

    submitted by ditnis

    copuless - Abstinent.

    e.g., "During Lent we are supposed to be copuless." "Say what?"

    submitted by Stanislaus Moss

    copululation - Two police cars parking side by side, facing opposite directions, with the officers chatting to each other out the windows.

    e.g., I flew past these two higway patrolmen at about 85mph--they were too busy copululating to notice me.

    submitted by Phungus

    copversation - Conversation between two cops while parked in their squads side-by-side facing opposite directions.

    e.g., Look, Earl, them two police is having a copversation over there.

    submitted by Judy Langer

    copymark - A copymark allows free copying and distribution of intellectual property. The work may not be sold, altered or modified from its original form without the creator's permission.

    e.g., I copymark some of my music to retain credit, and to publicize my sounds.

    submitted by Tom Day

    copywrite - (n.) 1. A variant (or solecism, if you're a purist,) of the legal term "copyright" (which means "the right to copy (or repeat) a given work," including the idea of distribution or sale); (v.) 2. Like "copyright," "copywrite" appears to have the same meaning: To secure a legal right against unauthorized misappropriation, misattribution, reproduction, distribution, transmission, or performance of your own work. [There's also a passive participle "copywritten."]

    e.g., "A district court just rejected a claim alleging that briefs were copywritten. fromEdward White v. West Publishing Corp, No. 12-1340 (S.D.N.Y.)," Debra Cassens Weiss,"Cut-and-paste brief brings sanction for Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer in tossed suit over Pitbull lyric," ABA Journal website (February 25, 2013), Comment 24 (posted by "Joe," March 1, 2013).

    submitted by scott m. ellsworth

    copywriter - A writer who works in advertising. The conceiver of ideas and writer of copy. Commonly used but not deemed worthy by normal dictionary standards.

    e.g., Noah is a Senior Copywriter at Thibeault Advertising.

    submitted by noah

    coralatory - To affect something else.

    e.g., Food has a coralatory effect on my weight.

    submitted by Lynn Duffield

    corall'd - When you are feeling generally crappy or overly tired.

    e.g., I'm feeling corall'd after last night.

    submitted by kate

    cordeal - (core-DEAL; intr. v.) 1. To speak the truth despite its having devastating, even catastrophic consequences; 2. to remain loyal or loving despite monstrous betrayal; 3. to return to assist someone who has turned from you or betrayed you purely out of loyalty; 4. to be brutally honest, even if it hurts the speaker or the hearer. [From Shakespeare's King Lear, who demands that his three daughters (Goneril, Regan, and Cordelia) vie to declare which loves him best. Cordelia refuses, and Lear disowns and banishes her; she nevertheless returns and attempts to save her father after Goneril and Regan rebel and usurp the royal authority.] (cf. "Learize," "Gonerillify," and "Reganate.")

    e.g., If you read the whole of Perrault's Cinderella, you discover that Cinderella cordeals amazingly, finding wealthy husbands for her cruel stepsisters and taking no vengeance on he evil stepmother.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    cordelia - Savage-tongued, gossipy young woman. Inspired by the character Cordelia Chase, from TVs Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

    e.g., I'm so outraged I just have to realize the Cordelia within and tell all.

    submitted by Meghan

    cordon blanche - A free hand to cook whatever takes one's fancy, an amalgam of cordon bleu and carte blance.

    e.g., "Gary, what do you want for dinner tonight?" "Anything you like, Hilde; I will give you cordon blanche."

    submitted by Colin Taffel with acknowledgements to Ga

    corduroian - A person who is laid back about fashion and, therefore, on most days of the week and for most occasions, wears corduroy.

    e.g., With his laid back attitude and the flannel shirt, I knew he was a corduroian.

    submitted by M. K. O'Leary

    cordy'all - Southern graciousness.

    e.g., Dwayne Johnston of Mobile, Alabama, is a Southern gentleman. Well-groomed and impeccably dressed, always with a string tie and white waistcoat, he greets men with a wide smile, and a firm handshake. ↵ ␊ He clasps a woman's hand warmly and gazes kindly into her eyes, and inquires into her health. Genial and affable, he responds mainly positive, with "Yes, Ma'am" and "Yes, Suh." He never discusses politics. ↵ ␊ Escorting a lady in his car, he opens the car door for her as she enters and exits, and offers his arm for support as they go into the venue. ↵ ␊ Dwayne is much more than "cordial;" he is "cordy'all." He is also a figment of contemporary imagination.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

    core-quip - (n.) 1. a apothegm, saying, saw, maxim, proverb, sound-bite vel cet., upon which someone bases their perception of or responses to circumstances. Very often, core-quips are the 21st century substitute for a life philosophy: they are like core-value fast food: they sound classy and require no hard knocks to learn or to adopt... and everybody simply nods at them, no questions asked---of course, very often, they are just banal truisms that deserve no discussion. Core-quips are usually poinky (q.v.) or witty and are rarely, if ever, analyzed or subject to any internal scrutiny by their utterers, although (Heaven knows) they ought to be.

    e.g., Popular core-quips that probably need reexamining: * No news is good news. [No: no news is no news; Remember, the Carpathia heard nothing about the Titanic sinking only a few miles away (of course, the radioman had turned the radio off, but still).] * If you think your bundle's too heavy, try lifting your neighbors.] [This makes no sense at all. So your neighbors bundle is heavier than yours; so what? That doesn't lighten yours; it's still too heavy.] * Nothing is black or white. [True: most things are covered in smaller and smaller black and white dots. But, you know, reducing everything to "black," "white," and shades of "grey" is seriously oversimplifying things.] * Believe in yourself and you can do anything. [um. No, you can't.] * Play the hand you're dealt. [This one's funny, since any poker player can tell you the first thing you do with a five-card-draw hand is trade in cards you can't use. Sure: play the hand you're dealt, but remember, playing the hand means trying to make the hand better.] * Focus on what's right in your world instead of what's wrong. [Then you just end up with a whole lot of unaddressed wrong.] * Advice after mischief is like medicine after death. [Hm. That's true of the individual perhaps (but what about epinephrin to a stopped heart?). And we seem to come up with most medicine after a lot of people die. Think of penicillin or the polio vaccine.] * Worrying never changed anything. [Bull. Before the D-day Invasion, British intelligence dropped a body with a briefcase full of fake invasion plans on a beach. German intelligence had to take the false information into account, of course, and their worrying about the false information tremendously assisting in diverting the German defenses away from the Normandy beaches. Worrying accomplished quite a lot there.] * Almost only counts in horseshoes. [Armored limousines and extra security exist because of almosts. Almost ALWAYS counts, unless you're just playing horseshoes, of course. No one cares about horseshoes but horses.] * Seeing is believing [This one's just stupid: seeing is (for our purposes here) knowing; believing is believing. You don't need to believe in something if you can see it.] * You only get one chance to make a first impression. [Perhaps, but only fools rely entirely on their first impressions.] * Expect the worst and you can never be disappointed. [Yeah, but you'll never be very happy, either.] * Poor planning on your part doesn't create an emergency on mine. [Nuclear accidents, many diseases, and most wars are the result of poor planning.] * Never regret anything that makes you smile. [Are you insane?] * You can't judge a book by its cover. [That was before they made dustjackets and paperbacks. With pictures. Unless someone is screwing around with the cover art, you often CAN judge a book by its cover.] * If you can't bite, don't show your teeth. [Sometimes baring your teeth may drive off a hunter intent on easier prey. Don't just meekly knuckle under, no matter what this quip dictates.] * Don't make a mountain out of a molehill. [Be VERY careful of this one. Calling something a "molehill" doesn't make it a "molehill." As the poet says, "Do not by 'small' things be betrayed: some molehills are of mountains made."]

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    corel, to - To inundate with bugs when a user switches to a new .0 release of Corel software. Corelphobia = fear of Corel products.

    e.g., So you've been corelled.

    More than 10 years ago, I purchased a version of the QuattroPro spreadsheet program. I updated to new versions through 6.0. Some time after that, Corel purchased the company. Later versions always had many more bugs in them than the versions before Corel took over.

    So, I've continued to use 6.0 – it does everything I need it to do (pretty simple stuff, really) and I've never run into any bugs. I have always thought that was amazing for a .0 release. I have what amounts to zerophobia, a fear of .0 software releases. I try to avoid them. I'm willing to wait a while for a .1 release that corrects the bugs in the initial release, the one that introduced new functionality.

    Because of the problems I experienced, I also have Corelphobia. I'm far, far too old to waste any of the precious time I have left on Earth with any Corel products. If it says Corel on the box, I just move along and look for something else.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    corhea - Twin-headed South American ostrich-like flightless bird.

    e.g., The corhea was so rheviled by the rhegular rheas that it/they{?} rhemoved to norhtheasterhn Asia; that was the rheal rheason they named the countrhy after the birhd (rheally? - rhot!). The rhight rheason was that the rhea rheacted rhegally; it was rheally rhoyalty.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    corish - Very cool, extremely challenging.

    e.g., Theory of Complex Variables is my most corish 7th grade course.

    submitted by matron

    corkeltite - Cement industry innovation--corkletite is made out of glass and toothpaste.

    e.g., Corkletite may be more expensive initially, but it lasts longer than regular concrete.

    submitted by Lauren

    corleoned - To make an offer that someone cannot refuse. Either through bodily harm or overt pressures of violence.

    e.g., The store clerk was corleoned into opening the safe.

    submitted by chris

    corn chip - Pitiful attempt at a ponytail by guys trying to grow out their hair. Always the size of a corn chip and usually curled under or all over the place.

    e.g., Jiff was proud of his luxurious locks. Unfortunately, whenever he tried to pull them back into a sassy style, the result was a corn chip.

    submitted by Elizabeth Pickering

    corn flake - ddd

    e.g., ddd

    submitted by ddd

    corn maze - (n.) 1. something believed to be the simplicity of simple folk ("rustics," "yokels," "hillbillies," and so forth) which turns out to be quite complex; also, antithetically, 2. a problem which can be easily resolved if one is willing to break the rules; 3. "Cornmazement": the shock accompanying the discovery that something is a "corn maze" as defined above.

    e.g., Cop: "Aha! Ya'll rigged up a still for whiskey, didn't ya?" Zeke: "Nope, we done set this up as a distillery to study possible nonfossil fuels." Cousin Zeb: "Yeah, we're a-hopin' we can git a vigreux column or two, cuz that'd really help with compound fractionation." Cop: "... um, yeah. Okay, well, I'll leave you to it." Miss Pearl: "Ya'll done denaturin' them ethanols?"

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    corn phone - A type of cell phone. A person speaks into the shuck portion and listens through the cob. The cob is placed in the shuck when not in use.

    e.g., Bob called George on his new corn phone.

    submitted by Scooter

    corn pome [sic] - This is either a pome (poem) about or praising corn -- or, a pome that is like downhome, or corny. (-:

    e.g., I'm liking corn and growing corn and eating corn and great fields of corn, so corn pome is suiting me just fine.

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    corn starch - Both the feeling of and remedy for jock itch.

    e.g., Jim. Why do you keep fidgeting? Ed. Corn starch. Jim. Well, go get some corn starch.

    submitted by Zak

    cornball - A very annoying and unpleasant person.

    e.g., I don't think we want to bring Chris to the party. He's kind of a cornball.

    submitted by rick

    cornbinder - Any vehicle made by International Harvester Co.

    e.g., Based on the what International made before they made trucks. After seeing an old International pickup going down the road, "There goes a cornbinder."

    submitted by Don Waltenspiel

    cornbread - Reference to the song "No sex in the champagne room" by Chris Rock. In it he says "Cornbread. Ain't nothin' wrong with that." So I made up this word to mean that someone is perfect and you can't find anything wrong with her, just like cornbread.

    e.g., Girrrrl, did you see that fine blonde guy? He was cornbread.

    submitted by Serra - (www)

    corndogging - Being excessively stupid or making an unwise decision. It may also refer to the being geeky, as in, unwise to the ways of the world.

    e.g., He was really corndogging when he tried to make his own fireworks.

    submitted by Jacob S.

    cornduroy - Rows of a field of corn resembling corduroy fabric.

    e.g., You'll see a lot of cornduroy when driving through Wisconsin.

    submitted by liz

    corner - One who corn. That is, one who always speaks melodramatically or with undue sentiment.

    e.g., We all knew Chris was a corner-- always harping about her horrible life was and how she never got the things she wanted.

    submitted by Sean - (www)

    cornholio, to pull a - An alternative state of mind brought on by over-consumption of energy-boosting products, usually the night before a deadline. Also known as a "red bullfight." Marked by excessive twitchiness, loss of reasoning, incessant incomprehensible jabbering, lapses in consciousness, and disheveled or odd appearance.

    e.g., "What the hell is wrong with Josh? He's running around like a maniac." "Don't worry too much. He has to hand in his essay today, and he's just pulling a cornholio at the moment." "He's just having a red bullfight."

    submitted by OJ - (www)

    cornify - To reduce the value of statements due to ingenuity.

    e.g., Instead of a real response to the e-mail, I merely attempted to cornify the e-mail I received.

    submitted by d. stuart smith

    cornnoble - Hit by a fish. Apparently from a misspelling when Mrs. Byrne's Dictionary Dictionary of Unusual, Obscure, and Preposterous Words was put online. Mrs. Bryne gives the meaning as "hit by a fist."

    e.g., Go back in there and the onliest thing that will happen is that you will get cornnobled again.

    submitted by Miss Speller

    cornography - An illicit, underground industry catering to the prurient interests of those who are titillated by the procreational activities of Zea, a tall, cereal grass bearing kernels on large ears.

    e.g., The entire farming community was shocked to learn that the Jolly Green Giant was caught producing and distributing cornography.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    cornography - Blatantly cheesy, overtly and transparently glib line. Usually an excuse or a line.

    e.g., Man I can't believe Lucy bought that. That was pure cornography.

    submitted by Stuart McDonald

    cornunar - (cor'-noo-nar'; adj.) of or pertaining to a person who professes (mistakenly) to know more about a subject than someone else. (n.) the refutation or rebuttal serving to demonstrate that the person refuted does _not_ know the subject or understand the principle in question at all. [Short for Quenya _i cormu na cornunar_ "both rings are round": JRR Tolkien responded to a know-it-all's declaration that Tolkien's Ring "is the ring of the Nibelungs." Tolkien declared that "both are round; there the resemblance ends" (or words to that effect).]

    e.g., I knew a student once who thought Kurasawa's _Seven Samurai_ was a poor copy of _the magnificent seven." of course, it's the other way around: _Seven Samurai was made in '54, while the _magnificent Seven_ was made in 1960. ... Cornunar.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    cornwallis - an actual place and surname, but used in speech primarily because the untrained ear finds it funny or stupid sounding. Ergo, anything lame or stupid.

    e.g., That tie is really cornwallis, Steve. I'm urged to take scissors to it.

    submitted by steve zihlavsky

    cornyfunny - Both corny and funny at the same time.

    e.g., The movie we watched was more than just funny, it was cornyfunny.

    submitted by Kristen - (www)

    coron - (v., pronounced CORE-un, to rhyme with 'foreign') 1. to inspect and analyze (i.e., autopsy, necropsy) dead bodies (implicitly human, but animal as well); 2. to serve as a coroner; 3. to watch forensic evidence tv shows (e.g., CSI, Bones, and the like). The Gerun form is "coroning."

    e.g., Do you want to go see Dark Knight, or are you just gonna sit around and Coron all evening?

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    coronate - A variation on "crown." What happens at a coronation.

    e.g., We were talking about getting our first TV set to watch the Queen being coronated in 1953.

    submitted by ALISON

    corp ulent - Describing an particularly stolid business entity, heavy in cash, weighty in assets, and often bulging with marketable securities.Suc h companies are often prime candidates for takeovers.

    e.g., The Hersey Corporation not only has products that are deliciously sweet and highly caloric, but as a company is itself rich and corp ulent. Yum!

    submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

    corp-help book - One of those little tomes offering a "self-help"–style approach to the challenges faced by corporate executives.

    e.g., The latest corp-help book that my boss made me read advises us not to waste so much time reading corp-help books.

    submitted by Jonathan Caws-Elwitt - (www)

    corporarchy - A country where the illusion of democracy is maintained while private sector corporations actually make all of the decisions for the elected government, based on how it benefits the corporations. A hybrid of elected government and private sector corporations.

    e.g., Canada, much like the United States, is increasingly heading towards a pseudo-democracy where the corporarchy continues to subvert real democracy.

    submitted by D. Grant Black, Fernie, B.C. Canada

    corporate bagger - A person who takes advantage of a corporation's financial instability to take control of it or destroy it. Cf: carpetbagger.

    e.g., The corporate bagger offered fifty million for the company, and the board members were in such dire need of cash that they sold.

    submitted by Deacon

    corporate communism - A philosophy that does not tolerate competition.

    e.g., There are four McDonald's within a three block radius. This town has been ruined by corporate communism.

    submitted by William f Davidson

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