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c 'n' e goer - Person who attends church only for Christmas and Easter and usually only to please her parents.

e.g., Jane is not that religious. She's just a C 'n' E goer.

submitted by marnie - (www)

c clef - An alternative (mid-range) clef for those not interested in bass or treble.

e.g., When playin' d blues on my harp, I like the C clef.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

c n' c - The President of the United States, the Commander in Chief.

e.g., The C N' C is in Air Force One over the Atlantic at the moment.

submitted by Stephen Mize

c to the g - Something that is the ultimate. The highest quality attainable. State of the art.

e.g., Have you seen my new plasma screen TV? It's C to the G.

submitted by Paul

c$erve - Short for Compuserve.

e.g., I can't blow off c$erve until I figure out how to export 15 years of proprietary format mail.

submitted by Joel Garry - (www)

c'f'n' - Short for "Ciao f'niao," it is a form of farewell and it means "Until later."

e.g., "Ciao f'niao." "Ciao f'niao." "C'f'n."

submitted by Zeromay Zentroclo

c'ma' - Slang for come on. Used by lazy people who find shortcuts for everything, including words.

e.g., C'ma' villain, just give me the princess. I'll give you her fiance in exchange. Opens a few doors for me.

submitted by Roman Lee - (www)

c'n - Contraction for can.

e.g., C'n you get me that can?

submitted by Squackle! - (www)

c-47 - Filmmaking slang for a spring action clothespin. Clothespins are often used to attach colored filters to lights. This term is said to come from an expense report where clothespins are called C-47s to hide the fact there there is no way they could have cost as much as was reported.

e.g., Phil, make yourself useful and hand me the C-47s.

submitted by Scott Marchus

c-master - A type of opponent, mainly seen in FIFA soccer video games, who repeatedly taps the "C" button to kick the ball downfield, which sometimes results in goals.

e.g., JJ dribbles, passes. He's a pleasure to watch. Other people are just C-Masters when they play.

submitted by TLigs

c-town - Slang term for the city of Cleveland. Probably first coined by Jim Rome in his daily syndicated radio show.

e.g., C-Town rocks are usually very reasonably priced.

submitted by Ruben Garcia

c3i - Command, Control, Communications, and Intelligence.

e.g., Good C3I is the backbone of any largescale operation, like the one presently underway in Afganistan.

submitted by Stephen Mize

c4 explosive chassis option - A notional feature on a new car that consists of a chassis lined with C4 plastic explosive. What cars in R-rated action movies typically come equipped with, since they seem to explode in fantastic and colorful fashion at the slightest impact.

e.g., Did you see that scene where Travolta drove that Jaguar into a bus and it burst into flames? They must've ordered the C4 explosive chassis option.

submitted by bitwize

ctellar - A reference to the stars in the galaxies, located in the basement area of the universe.

e.g., The complexities of our language include the choice of when to speak "C" as a soft "S" or as a hard letter as in "concrete." "Ctellar" is an example of the difficulties immigrants face when learning our language, and, with our luck, probably where our solar system is located, not in the penthouse or even first floor, but in the lowest level of the universe, next to the furnace.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

cab farm - The place where old taxis are sent.

e.g., Every taxi I take looks as if it should be sent to the cab farm.

submitted by HD Fowler

cab-badge - A taxi medallion. Pronounced the same as cabbage.

e.g., To legally drive a taxi in New York City, you need a cab-badge.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

cabanger - Something that is broken or worn out.

e.g., You're planning to drive me to the prom in that cabanger!?

submitted by ksw_babe

cabbage - To do nothing; to be a slacker.

e.g., I was so tired yesterday, I just cabbaged on the couch all day and watched TV.

submitted by Julia

cabbage - A dis to someone, calling her a useless vegetable.

e.g., Tyler: Hi, Laura. Laura: Don't talk to me, you cabbage.

submitted by Laura

cabell - A person (male or female, but very manly) who pretends to be smart and acts as if she's an expert in the Japanese culture. Usually a talentless elitest.

e.g., Did you see Chris in class today? She was being a cabell. What a wannabe.

submitted by Amara - (www)

cabinated - Used to describe the inability to leave your cabin due to heavy snowfall.

e.g., After a foot of snow, John has been cabinated all week.

submitted by John Nava

cabinet - In Rhode Island the soda fountain drink made with milk, flavoring, and ice cream. Called a frappe in MA, a milkshake in other areas, etc. A Rhode Island milk shake does not contain ice cream.

e.g., Two coffee cabinets, please.

submitted by Jack Bettencourt

cable - Bulky gold chain.

e.g., Check out the cable around his neck.

submitted by Jerome Greco - (www)

cable-ten - Low budget, cheap, shameful, despicable, shoddy, inexpensive.

e.g., Look at yourself. Could you get any more cable-ten?

submitted by the mark

cabled - wired squared. Being so tense or wired that your muscles are wired together into cables.

e.g., Schlackel is as tense as a brick -- he is cabled.

submitted by redbendad - (www)

cablonea - An oblong area of land that does not have any boundaries at the two shortest ends. The boundaries on the longest sides can be any width and are usually around 250km long.

e.g., It is around one cablonea from London to Birmingham.

submitted by Gutts

caboodles - A word that starts or ends a sentence saying that you have forgotton to do something or have done it wrong.

e.g., Caboodles, I haven't done my French homework. I've done all my work wrong, caboodles!

submitted by Emily

caboon - An intern, particularly in a research project involving hawks. Supposedly from some Malay language where it denotes slave.

e.g., You are the most stupid caboon that I have known.

submitted by Helmut C. Mueller

cacamaeme, kakamaeme - Trifling, nearly valueless. Check spelling. This slang term is so widely used it's almost not slang, but it's NOT in my Webster's dictionary. In any case, it ought to be in any slang dictionary. (ED. Submitter spelled as "kakamaeme." If the etymology is uncertain, as it appears to be, he may have stumbled upon the correct idea: caca.)

e.g., This entry made it into the PseudoDictionary because of its sort of cacamaeme spelling.

submitted by Theodore Voelkel - (www)

cacanog - An idiot.

e.g., K: Why is your brother's door upside down? J: He's a cacanog.

submitted by Kaiden

cacatastrophe - What you have when so many piddling little things go wrong all at once that it makes you want to say, "Oh, -- crap."

e.g., Bill, what we have here is no catastrophe -- but it's surely a cacatastrophe.

submitted by HD Fowler

cacatory - "Accompanied by a diarrhea."

e.g., "After last night's cacatory episode, I'll be avoiding that roadside cafe like the plague."

submitted by HD Fowler

cachephrase - Catchphrase stored in your cache.

e.g., With any luck it'll turn out to be a cachephrase and I won't have to access the Internet to find it again. My modems not working today.

submitted by Miss Speller

cachique - A female who's popular, hot, and stylish. An "anybody-anyone-looks-up-to" kind of girl.

e.g., Matt: Wooooow! You are a cachique personified. How do you DO it? Nicky: Oh, you know.

submitted by Nicky Ubben

cack - Individuals who are of great arrogance, or who are wholly belonging to the "mainstream" society and laws of social conformity and use that to their advantage. Cacks are also identified as "asshole" or similar offensive names.

e.g., Due to the thirty gallons of coffee you drink every day, and the minimum wage you pay, that automatically makes you, sir, a cack.

submitted by Jay (Avatar) - (www)

cack chugula - A respectfully deprecating nickname usually bestowed upon those who excel in slothing, boozing, and storytelling.

e.g., Get off the couch and answer the door, Cack Chugula. The pizza guy is here.

submitted by scorched - (www)

cackiavellian - From her article in the Guardian on 28 April: "attempting to be Machiavellian but making a hash of it."

  • {ED. Since I use the phonynym Machiavellean on the Internet, I propose that "machiavellean" have a meaning along the lines of "to do anything but make a hash of it." That, of course, might not apply to social situations -- and might well not have applied to an earlier me.}

    e.g., One thing that may give me relief this political season will be having most of the political machinations turn out to be cackiavellian.

    submitted by [Marina Hyde]

    cackleberry - An egg down under.

    e.g., Let's go see how many cackleberries the chickens have laid today.

    submitted by pauline

    cacklemongress - A young woman who cackles incessantly, whether or not it is appropriate to do so.

    e.g., I can't hear myself think. For heaven's sake won't somebody unplug that confounded cacklemongress.

    submitted by Colin Taffel

    cacobadous - Full of badness.

    e.g., Chris is full of cacobadous.

    submitted by snowboardinghockeyplayer3 - (www)

    cacographer - "A bad speller or writer." We need this word.

    e.g., They give awards to cacographers.  

    Check out the Bulwer-Lytton website (www.bulwer-lytton.com). "It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents -- except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness." 
    ~Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)

    submitted by HD Fowler

    cacollypsis - (n.) (kak-o-LIP-sus) 1. A series of three dots (...) placed at the end of a sentence to show that the reader has failed at a specific task. It is a written version of the audience's "Awwww" heard on a game show when a player loses. 2. A sentence ending with a cacollypsis. (Etymology: Greek caco-, kako- [bad] + English ellipsis [three dots]. The spelling is altered to look more like Greek.)  

    (ED. To learn how the ellipsis is used in the United States, check the link. In particular, learn how to use an ellipsis following a period. . . . Now that we have Mirakle B.'s invented word, I recommend it for any misuse of an ellipsis. Is it a misuse to use three consecutive periods to represent an ellipsis without intervening non-breaking spaces -- except as described here? That's a matter of opinion, but my opinion is yes. A pre-fabricated Unicode ellipsis character […] is sometimes used for an ellipsis-look-alike that takes up only one byte of storage. The problem? That character may not work across platforms.)

    e.g., In many Japanese games such as Final Fantasy, when a player is killed in combat, he or she will be presented with a cacollypsis such as «You have lost...».  

    (ED. Angle quotation marks were used to avoid a style conflict between American usage and other English usage. The style chosen for this site is that of American typographers: Periods appear inside quotation marks to look pretty, not because it's the logical place to put them.)

    submitted by Mirakle B. - (www)

    caconym - The Dictionary of Difficult Words: "n. bad or wrongly derived name. caconymic, a."

    e.g., There's just no way out of it, the word's a caconym. Chris has no idea what she's saying.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    cacophemism - The use of a more expressive, more distasteful word in place of another. It would be the opposite of euphemism. "Eu" in greek means well or good; "kakos" means bad or evil.

    e.g., The use of the word corpse instead of "the deceased" is a good example.

    submitted by turk muller

    cacophonoid - An artificially derived creation specially suited for the exploration of cacophonous environments.

    e.g., Scientists have released a cacophonoid into the unknown environs of the strange new planet in an effort to explore, map, and make the planet suitable for human habitation.

    submitted by Matthew Goude - (www)

    cacotagified - To be made to act in an unusual bad way.

    e.g., After the boy was drugged, he was killing people as a result of him being cacotagified.

    submitted by snowboardinghockeyplayer3 - (www)

    cactal - Pertaining to a cactus.

    e.g., What is the cactal situation in the desert this year?

    submitted by Sammers

    cactupus - A crossbreed between a cactus and an octopus.

    e.g., Look at that cactapus behind your head.

    submitted by eric

    cad - From Cadbury chocolate company in Australia and New Zealand. A person who is as smooth and yummy looking as the chocolate.

    e.g., Did you see the cute guy who just walked past. Definitely cad.

    submitted by emma

    cad-monkey - Over-qualified under-paid architect working for over-paid computer-illiterate designer. CAD monkey as opposed to code monkey.

    e.g., Don't cancel the client meeting. Tommy can be a cad-monkey this weekend.

    submitted by vito

    cadalogue - A playboy's "little black book" of addresses, phone numbers, and descriptions of "willing" ladies.

    e.g., "Hmmm," said Henri, picking up his little black book, "Let's see what type of lovely I'll grace with my presence tonight -- blonde, brunette, or redhead?" "Why, they're all grey or dead now, you aging old lover boy, sir," responded Winton, his faithful valet. "That cadalogue's over forty years old."

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    caddiwompas - The state of being grossly out of alignment, skewed, or uneven.

    e.g., There was so much weight piled on one side of the van, it sat caddiwompas.

    submitted by Randy Reigner

    caddiwompi - The plural form of caddiwompas, meaning, multiple things are screwed up.

    e.g., Those cars are caddiwompi.

    submitted by Mark

    caddywampus - It means kittycorner, or askew.

    e.g., The tornado blew the house all caddywampus. The liquor store is caddywampus from the "Lovely Mullet" Hair Say-lon.

    submitted by M Keith

    cadge -

    © Michael Quinion -- Cadge To scrounge or beg something from somebody.

    e.g., "See if you can cadge a lift to the pub."

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    cadoure - Vintage French decor.

    e.g., The home had 1970s cadoure.

    submitted by Gene Seibel - (www)

    caf - A cafeteria, preferably one in a high school or college campus.

    e.g., eah, let's go to the caf and get some pizza.

    submitted by Holly

    cafe hag - A female who frequents coffee-houses and drinks unfeasible quantities of decaf.

    e.g., That cafe hag on table 4 had just ordered a FIFTH cup of decaf.

    submitted by Colin Taffel

    caffiend - One with an exceptionally strong addiction and love for caffeine.

    e.g., He can't sleep because he's a caffiend.

    submitted by Craig - (www)

    caffok - Banged up, really old car.

    e.g., The student got around in a red Caffok that she bought for £750.

    submitted by Phatman

    caffuffed - To be extremely exhausted and tired, as a result of which you fall asleep.

    e.g., I was caffuffed after cooking for the whole Smith family so I went straight to bed.

    submitted by Kiri the Aussie Chick

    cafirnicus - A railway up the side of a mountain, consisting of two counterbalanced cars at either end of a cable passing round a driving wheel at the summit.

    e.g., We walked about the 5,000 steps to Sacre Coure instead of using the cafirnicus.

    submitted by Random Parisian

    cage - Motorcyclists' slang for a car.

    e.g., That cage almost hit me broadside.

    submitted by ryan meith

    cagey - "Feeling pent up, need to get outside"

    e.g., "I've been in this office too long. I'm getting cagey"

    submitted by su_cram - (www)

    caggy - (clothing) Adjective meaning old and unwanted yet still useful i.e. decorating wear

    e.g., I'll put on those caggy jeans to clean out the garage

    submitted by Ben Bissett - (www)

    cah - Car.

    e.g., I'm thinking I might get a new cah soon.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    cahonies - Cojones -- balls, guts, fortitude.

    e.g., I see many of those in the anti-cop demonstrations as being people who lack the cahonies to be a police officer.

    submitted by Miss Speller

    cahoonies - Cojones: testicles.

    e.g., "Cahoonies"? I like it. I'll put that spelling in my personal dictionary. | You lack the cahoonies to challenge Loretta on the ... matter.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    cahoot - (Rhymes with "the-BOOT"; n.) 1. One conspirator; 2. A very small conspiracy; (also "cahoots") 3. A small town in New Mexico (or Texas or Oregon or Maine or Spain or Beirut or Canberra or Madhya Pradesh or Tierra del Fuego or somewhere) where people go to conspire (or are said to be when conspiring).

    e.g., "You cannot defeat us! We are part of a global conspiracy!" "Just how many of you are there?" "You mean besides me, Joey, and Decker?" "Yeah, besides you three." "Tens of thousands! Well, okay: thousands … tens of hundreds … well … hundreds … okay, then, tens, eventually. All right, all right! There's only the three of us---but not for long!" "Whoa! Quite a cahoot you've got goin' there." | "Okay, that's a scary look you're wearing: equal parts hauteur and fiendish glee." "Yesss. I have been to Cahoots!" "What is that? Like a bar or a pub or something?" "No. No. Come on, you know: 'in cahoots'?" "What? No, I've never heard of it. Where is it?" "Never mind."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    caint - Ain't abel to. Cain, Abel--Get it. Got it.

    e.g., My girl fren caint write hur name, cuz she dont know how to rite.

    submitted by P I E

    cajunas - Balls. A misspelling of the Spanish cojones.

    e.g., Of course I'm not scared of you, Chris. You lack the cajunas to try anything without your posse here to hold me down while you kick me.

    submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

    cajunga - The use of largeness in extremist notions, the vernacular of "bigger is better and brighter is louder -- and louder is cool."

    e.g., Max cast a discriminating gaze over the equipment before stating out loud, "Man, you have one cajunga entertainment system."

    submitted by Wuff Jones

    cak - Hitting your shin on something hard and usually blunt, so it makes the shin bone, which is close to the skin on the front of your shin, hurt like bejesus. From mountain biking, where the most usual blunt instrument for cakking is a pedal.

    e.g., "Owwwwwww! Just cakked my right shin on my SPuD (qv) on that last descent."

    submitted by bent udder - (www)

    cake - "money, lots of it."

    e.g., That Bill Gates is rolling in cake!

    submitted by Slorge Gridlock

    cake - Used to describe a woman who has a fat ass--in a good way.

    e.g., J Lo has cake.

    submitted by meeell

    cake and pie - So easy as to be laughable, "a piece of cake" and "easy as pie" combined, from Bill Gibson, somewhere in the Neuromancer trilogy.

    e.g., Doing graphics on a Macintosh? Cake and pie!

    submitted by Phil Vassar-not the Nashville guy!

    cake-in - To lay it on thick. When a guy spends a lot of time investing in a girl.

    e.g., You are really cake-in with that girl on the phone.

    submitted by K

    cake-tastrophe - 1. A sudden calamity involving cake. 2. Really bad cake. 3. Something bad that happens to you with a cake.

    e.g., I was carrying your birthday cake down the street on my way back from the bakery when I suddenly tripped -- the cake splattered on a passing car's windshield and caused it to crash. It was a caketastrophe.

    submitted by John Driscoll

    caked - To get tore up, tore down, or otherwise excessively schnockered.

    e.g., Forgot I took that Benadryl for my sinuses last night -- that wine on top of it got me pretty caked.

    submitted by david mock

    cakehead - Someone who is not very bright.

    e.g., That cakehead just ran that redlight.

    submitted by downthezero

    cakesmith - (n.) 1. A maker of cakes, especially expertly made and decorated ones, such as wedding cakes and the like; 2. Any maker of cakes or pastries; 3. by extension, Any maker and/or decorator of any sort of sweet food involving flour or cornmeal as well as sugar (e.g., cookies, cinnamon bread, etc.).

    e.g., "We were thinking this cake? ..." "Let me see: Whoa! That's a real piece of work. You'll need a really good cakesmith for that one. Look at the icing!"

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    cakestasy - Shoving your face into a cake. Usually done by extremely happy children.

    e.g., Two-year-old Jimmy engaged in an act of cakestasy that was so cute both of his grandmothers started to cry.

    submitted by reese danger epstein

    cakewalk - Easily done, same as "a piece of cake."

    e.g., Our calculus test was cakewalk. (There is a "dance" called a cakewalk. If you're on the right "square" when the music stops, you win a cake. It's also defined as "something accomplished with supreme ease.")

    submitted by Dank

    cakt - (adjective) A sharp remark that makes you feel hopeless and lowers your confidence, usually given by a toxic person.

    e.g., Mohan: I want to become a photographer because I am passionate about it. Shyam: Stop blabbering; you know nothing about photography; you don't even deserve it. You're useless. Mohan: I can do without your cakt.

    submitted by Priyal Kumar - (www)

    calamatastrophy - Worse than a calamity but not quite a catastrophe.

    e.g., There was a calamatastrophy involving 23 cars on the freeway last night

    submitted by Wayne Crabtree

    calcaholic - Person so accustomed to using her calculator that she can no longer perform simple math in her head.

    e.g., There goes Jamie, the calcaholic. We all laughed when she reached for her calculator to add 4+2.

    submitted by Bob Boarker

    calculator brain - A person who plays with numbers in her head and on paper, dreaming and daydreaming of them so much so that random calculations tossed at said persons are tossed back solved in seconds. Predisposed mathematically beyond even a mathematician -- i.e., shakuntala devi.

    e.g., In my youth, before the paint fumes started affecting me, I was a calculator brain.

    submitted by steve zihlavsky

    calculeer - The dead lifeless look on one's face after sitting through Mr. Graham's calculus class.

    e.g., Jane sure has a mean calculeer on her face today.

    submitted by SLOjewnamedPRU

    calculmabobber - A type of calculator that perfroms functions beyond addition, subtraction, multiplication and division -- e.g., scientific, graphing, and finance calculators.

    e.g., Bob: What's the natural log of 2? Fred: Hang on, let me get my calculmabobber.

    submitted by Louis

    calculus of cerebratohemorrhaginii - The process of answering children's (or anyone's for that matter) questions with the most ridiculous things you can think of repeatedly until the youngster no longer wants to ask you questions or tells you the answer the one she wanted you to guess.

    e.g., "Hey, Pappy, you know what me and Bubba did today?" "Sure do, spanked a hippopotamus, didn't you?" "No." "Ate some bullets, huh?" "No." "Mashed some crickets up for dinner." "No." "Walked to China with some snow shoes on." "No." "Ilberton pothumpkinality." "Pappy, I'm tired of your calculus of cerebratohemorrhaginii -- we just colored."

    submitted by Steve Zihlavsky

    calcumalator - Calculator. Use the word when you want to feign stupidity.

    e.g., I can't do these physics problems, even when I use my calcumalator.

    submitted by EggieChan

    calcusehfigurlate - To calculate figures using techniques not taught in school and generally incomprehensible to ordinary folks.

    e.g., I used to love confounding Mr. Moskowitz, my fifth grade teacher, using calcusehfigurlation to solve algebraic problems.

    submitted by steve zihlavsky

    caldwellian - To brazenly use trickery, charm, craftiness, or sleight of hand to get your way; to scam or grift; exhibiting or possessing a general mischievous nature.

    e.g., So you planned the whole thing, and everyone got caught but you? How caldwellian.

    submitted by Mr. Chris Beefy

    calf rope - A Southern alternative to saying "uncle" when you surrender in a wrestling match. Until I read Evan Morris's mid-February newsletter on word and phrase origins, I had forgotten about using the expression as a kid.

    e.g., A couple of years earlier I'd have had Bill pinned and saying calf rope before you could say Jack Robinson. Alas, the younger boy had by then caught up with me in size and was as strong as a bull. |  

    What The Word Detective said about "calf rope" in 2003: Dear Word Detective: I know that a good many children, when being held down by the schoolyard bully, would have to say "uncle" so that they might go about their business un-bullied, but in my part of the world, East Texas to be specific, it seems that I would always have to say "calf rope." There does not seem to be many of my peers who remember anything like this and I'm afraid that it may have been a bad dream or something in my own psyche and nowhere else. Have you ever heard of this, or perhaps know of someone who has? -- Larry, via the internet.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    calico cat - Great. Usually about a time, place, or event. This is used by just a few of my friends and me in Kalamazoo, MI.

    e.g., This "At the Drive-In" show is thoroughly calico cat.

    submitted by mark - (www)

    california stop - Slowing to a roll, before hitting the gas and charging through a stop sign. A "Tijuana stop" involves going even faster.

    e.g., The cops couldn't give tickets to drivers for California stops, because they slowed down even less for the intersections, themselves.

    submitted by Steve McDonald

    californialitis - An overreaction to normal life while ignoring the actual issues, if any.

    e.g., 1. The program blipped and now my manager has californialitis. 2. Acting only on third party hearsay, the guy got californialitis and called the authorities.

    submitted by Jon K

    californication - The process of ruining the quality of life of a residential area by an influx of former residents of the state of California.

    e.g., Utah is being ruined by Californicators.

    submitted by David Boocher

    califunya - The California which exists solely for the tourists. That is to say: Disneyland, no smog, no traffic, the beach, no earthquakes, and nor mudslides.

    e.g., We decided to go to Califunya for our vacation this year.

    submitted by Paul

    caligula - A level of something, just above mad.

    e.g., Check out Bizarro with the powered-up chainsaw. He's caligula.

    submitted by Sam - (www)

    caligulitis - A personality disorder characterized by a sadistic thirst for power.

    e.g., My boss has caligulitis. He humiliates everybody and keeps threatening to fire people, and when somebody breaks under the strain he bursts out laughing.

    submitted by Wallace White

    caliphonia - An alternative name for California, given all the phonies who live there. Not new by any means, as indicated by the URL, but I thought of it because I made a ytpoe, not because I had ever seen it before.

    e.g., "Without reading the article, the decision, the Caliphonia Constitution, or Caliphonia law, it's a given that the Caliphonia Supreme Court was not wrong in its unanimous decision. By definition, it can't be wrong in its interpretation of California law. Right?"

    submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

    calipso - A frontal wedgie.

    e.g., The calipso in the math teachers' acid-wash jeans did not go down well with her students in the front row.

    submitted by slehora

    caliquat - Kali-kwot. An extremely special person.

    e.g., My girlfriend is a caliquat, and I love her so much.

    submitted by John

    callapitter - An infantilization of the word "caterpillar."

    e.g., One day that callapitter will turn into a beautiful flutterby.

    submitted by majick

    callender - Either "calendar" as a misspelling, or something that brings a conversation quickly to an end. Also a surname, as used in the Marie Callender restaurant chain.

    e.g., Chris started talking about phone sex and that was a callender.

    submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

    callifragilisticexpialidocious - Descriptive adjective for a rather ordinary exciting occurrence.

    e.g., That was definitely NOT something quite atrocious -- it was more than just callifragilisticexpialidocious; it was really out of the ordinary, even super.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    callipyge - An actual medical term meaning having an attractive backside. A polite way of telling someone she has same. Adj. callipygian, callipygous. Cf. steatopygous.

    e.g., Some believe J Lo may have the most profound case of callipyge ever recorded.

    submitted by Stephen Mize

    callithump - (n.) 1. a noisy boisterous parade 2. a noisy mock serenade (made by banging pans and kettles) to a newly married couple

    e.g., The Donald is surely the most callithumpian presidential candidate we've ever had.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    callow - To touch someone inappropirately

    e.g., He just callowed my privates.

    submitted by Joe

    calm - There are two uses: 1. Code for when you want to tell someone something but you can't because there's someone else around. Then they will know you want to tell them something later. 2. Code for stop the conversation because someone is coming.

    e.g., 1. You are talking to Sarah and Tom and you remember mid-conversation a juicy rumor you heard about Tom. You want to tell Sarah but can't because he's standing there. So you say, "Calm." Sarah then knows there's something you want to tell her later about Tom. 2. You are telling Sarah the juicy rumor when she sees Tom approaching. In order to stop the conversation in its tracks, she says, "Calm."

    submitted by Tiffany

    calmplacency - Similar to complacency. "Your plane has been bumping through bad weather for several long minutes. You can't see a thing but clouds. Suddenly, the plane bursts into sunlight. That reassuring moment is called. . . ."

    e.g., It's hard to be calmplacent when you've been sitting in the middle seat of a puddle jumper for four hours. Especially if two or three of those hours were spent sitting on the runway in Huntsville, Alabama -- in the middle of the summer with the temperature and relative humidity both measuring at 97+. Oh, yeah, and no air conditioning. On top of that, I have a severe case of claustrophobia combined with mild xenophobia . . . not to mention my borborygmiphobia and jumentophobia.

    submitted by [Richard Jaffe] - (www)

    calmtrol - a combo of calm down and control.

    e.g., He is so excitable I had to tell him to calmtrol himself.

    submitted by michele

    caloosa - I. Short for "Could Lose a few pounds" Usually used to describe a female that is not ugly but slightly overweight. II. Can also be used followed by a number indicating the amount of weight needs to use.

    e.g., I. Is he cute? he Caloosa. II. Is she cute? She Caloosa 20.

    submitted by Skip Hardley - (www)

    calorica - Level of measured intensity to something deemed interesting or "cool."

    e.g., That shirt is high (in) calorica.

    submitted by Adam Dachis - (www)

    calorific - Any food that is high in fat, sugar, and carbs can be called calorific.

    e.g., The doctor warned his patient to stay away from calorific foods to maintain a healthy weight.

    submitted by marianne VanAmburgh

    caloriotropogenic - (Rhymes with "pal-oreo-SOAP-uh-JEN-ik; adj.) 1. Of or pertaining to any practice, item, or strategy designed or applied to make one "hot" (i.e., sexually desirable, admirable, or noticeable).

    [From Latin calori, dative "toward the heat" + Greek trope "turn" + genic "producing"; literally "making (someone) turn toward the heat."]

    e.g., You should wear those bangle earrings: they're seriously caloriotropogenic, especially with that blouse. || "Nobody pays any attention to us when Paul's along: How come he's so caloriotropogenic?" "Well, twelve hours a week in weight training, six hours a week running, and ---" "Okay, I get it."

    Caloriotrophogenes (that is, "things that are caloriotropogenic"): women: trim physique, tight clothes, high heels, well-done make up, a flattering hair style, a wiggle in the walk and a giggle in the talk, etc.; men: muscles, two or three days unshaven, no shirt, sunglasses, v-shaped torso, etc. Smiles are good on both sexes, though younger men like to affect expressionlessness or even hostility. I have no idea why they believe women would be attracted to an angry animal, though.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    calp - Used to point out a pair of nice legs without the owner of the legs knowing. Abbreviation of a bad Spanish translation for "Damn, nice legs."

    e.g., Don't look now, but there's some calp behind you.

    submitted by whippyX

    calpany - (CAL-puh-nee, n.) 1. A complete failure to communicate, 2. The act of talking to somebody in a language, dialect, or jargon they don't know; (v. "CAL-pun") 3. to speak the wrong language or use the wrong words, leading to misunderstanding or even unintended offense; (adj. "cal-PAN-ik") 4. of or pertaining to such a breakdown of or failure to communicate; (adv. "cal-PAN-ih-lee" or "cal-PAN-ik-lee") 5. without getting through to anyone; (interj. "CAL-pah-nee") 6. "I didn't understand any of that" [i.e., what you/he/she/they said]. (from the Nepali AKALPANIYA "inconceivable!"), see also "risible mulct."

    e.g., "So there I was, trying to explain texting to a 75-year-old clergyman, but I couldn't get him to understand." "Calpany, you mean." "With fries: it was like speaking Cherokee to an audience of Swahili speakers." | "What we have here," says Cool-Hand Luke, "is Calpany."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    calypto maniac - A person who feels compelled to steal recordings of calypso music.

    e.g., The calypto maniac was caught, trying to smuggle Harry Belafonte CDs from a music store.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

    cam freeze - Cam for camera. Basically, to strike a pose. Somewhat akin to the recent Internet fad of flashmobs, but more related to the vogueing movement of the early 1990s.

    e.g., You should have seen me on the dancefloor last night. I was doing cam freezes and the crowd loved it!

    submitted by Paul

    came - A mix of cool and lame, used when you like something but are not sure others feel the same.

    e.g., N'Synch is kinda came.

    submitted by Matt

    came missing - Didn't show up as expected, was a no show, failed to show/appear.

    e.g., We waited several days till the end of December next year but the Honored Guest came missing. And that after 2000 years no less.

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    camel job - Insane person on a public transport system. Possibly from the fact that they have been known to rant about camels at times.

    e.g., I don't know why, but some bloody camel job or other always sits next to me. Do I give off some odor that attracts them?

    submitted by Hans Klein

    camel pepper - (interj.) a cry of astonishment at something -- object, activity, or event - that simply does not occur. [from the Latin cum mula peperit, "when a mule gives birth," a Roman saying meaning something will never happen. Mules are virtually always sterile, since they are donkey/horse hybrids with 63 chromosomes -- one less than a horse, one more than a donkey. Anyway, the cum mula turned into "camel," while the peperit became simply "pepper." Hence "Camel Pepper!" means, more or less, "horse hockey!" plus "when hell freezes over!"

    e.g., "No really: this guy on TV explained how we could become millionaires by using his program to invest in real estate. We could finally pay off our student loans and fly around the world!" "Oh, Camel pepper! That's all a bunch of hooey."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    camel toe - The same as a wedgie, except it only happens to females, and is a "front wedgy."

    e.g., That girl has camel toe.

    submitted by pippy

    camel toe hold - A stunt performed by an aquamaid formation on waterskis, where the rope is clutched between the legs near, if not directly against, the crotch.

    e.g., The act looked pretty good, but the Camel Toe Hold was a little sloppy. A picture can be found here: http://cox.mediaspangroup.com/groups/420/FSLO-1017715497-423420.jpg.

    submitted by Mcfarlan - (www)

    camelesque - Bumpy in texture or contour

    e.g., The gravel road was very camelesque; the passengers were thrown into the air.

    submitted by Puetz

    camelup - To get ready.

    e.g., Camelup before you go on a long walk.

    submitted by Richard Kerrney

    camera-kazi - Person who deliberately risks injury or death by taking photographs in a war zone, especially during periods of extreme danger.

    e.g., Susan was a real camera-kazi. Even as the bullets were coming closer, she stood up and continued taking pictures.

    submitted by John Waid

    camerabot - A robot-camera hybrid that uses digital recording technology, often used in surveillance.

    e.g., The new 610 model camerabot could record more than 60 hours of data.

    submitted by Sharon Ferrell

    camgirl - Girl who has a webcam, and, presumably, an audience

    e.g., http://www.metafilter.com/comments.mefi/8968: "What's more pathetic than attention-seeking camgirls?"

    submitted by Slithy Tove - (www)

    camilin - The holes in the window screen.

    e.g., There are a lot of camilin in one screen.

    submitted by Brianna 7th English

    cammo dudes - 1.Originally named for the private security firm which guards the purported Area 51 in New Mexico. So named because the employees of said firm dressed in camoflauge uniforms. 2. Can also refer to anyone who dresses in camoflauge as part of a uniform, fashion statement, or practical reason.

    e.g., 1. The cammo dudes were up on Freedom Ridge last night, so we couldn't get near the boundaryt to Area 51. 2. Mack: Deer Hunting season opens soon. Flack: How do you know? Mack: I've been seeing the cammo dudes hanging out around the convenience store.

    submitted by Paul

    camote - To cause a commotion.

    e.g., Chris is out camoting with his neighbors ... again. It's been going on for years -- ever since his pit bull almost bit off his neighbor's foot.

    submitted by LeAnn Roderick - (www)

    camouflageian - Someone who adapts to her surroundings very easily.

    e.g., Ram is very cordial. He's a camouflageian, too.

    submitted by prathap n k - (www)

    camp - 1. To remain in close proximity to or hover over. 2. To constantly refresh a message board post so that you immediately see any replies made to it or to search for a specific user's posts continuously on a message board. 3. (Multi-player Gaming) To stay close to a spawn point for a monster or player in order to assure yourself the kill.

    e.g., Bob is camping the copy machine today. He must have a large report. | I've camped this post for 20 minutes and still no replies to my thread. | Betty is so cool. I continually camp her posts just to see what she says. | I like the game, but there are too many lamers who camp all the spawns.

    submitted by Semi

    campagan - A pagan who campaigns for other pagans.

    e.g., No doubt the campagans prefer Democrats over Republicans.

    submitted by Miss Speller

    campaign cowboys - Or campaign cowgirls, as the case may be. Members of the political classes referred to as pollsters and pundits. These types show up more and more often as elections approach. Also campain {cowboy | cowgirl), given that any of them is more often than not a pain in the ass.

    e.g., Chris Wallace, Sunday afternoon, November 2, 1014: ~"Next we'll hear from campaign cowboys Karl Rove and Joe Trippi." "Yeah, they'll be doing their damndest to spin the truth to the advantage of their favored … parasites. | I'm more than tired of the asinine way the campain cowgirls carry water for their preferred political candidates and parties.

    submitted by [Chris Wallace]

    campain - The pain that all political campaigns turn into after a few weeks. From a misspelling.

    e.g., Six weeks from the first caucuses in Iowa and already more than a year into the Presidential Campain. How politically bludgeoned will we feel a year from now?


    The non-stop political campain that's been going on since 2000 grates on me more all the time. I'm not ready yet to agree with my Uncle Ed, but I'm getting closer and closer with each passing day. He said, "Things are getting so bad I'm sorta looking forward to dying." My Aunt Frances insisted he didn't mean it. Regardless, they're both dead now. Presumably perpetually politically peaceful.

    submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

    camper - Internet gaming lingo. Camper = player who sits in an area and kills other players repeatedly. A "camper" stays in one place and "sets up camp." By not moving far from a certain spot, a camper can pick off other players without being skilled. Used in multiplayer games where a player can gain a cheap upper hand by remaining in the same place.

    e.g., A: Bubba has stayed in the same spot the whole game. B: Yea, Bubba's a camper. C: I think he's pretty smart. A: You would. You're a camper yourself.

    submitted by alec

    camperoo - A camperoo is a highly efficient, extremely enthusiastic camper, one who lives for weekends spent communing with nature and fellow camperoos. If you are a true camperoo, you are at all times itchy to be out of town, tent in tow, even on a moment's notice. A camperoo represents all that is pure and good and fun about camping. No one has to tell you you're a camperoo . . . you just KNOW.

    e.g., Tyler's absence of complaints about the heat, ability to camp comfortably for three days with a minumum of gear, and campsite left exactly as he found it showed him to be a true camperoo.

    submitted by joy v.

    campful - More than a couple but less than a handful.

    e.g., You may have a campful of M & Ms before dinner.

    submitted by Rob Cloutier - (www)

    campiguous - A portmanteau of "ambiguous" and "camp." (ED. "Camp" in the example apparently refers to effeminate or foppish behavior.)

    e.g., Pegasus from Yu-Gi-Oh is extremely campiguous.

    submitted by azraphon

    camplaigners - Candidates who campaign by complaining. "My husband, Ed Bradley Jr., has coined a new word to describe the current field of (Democratic) candidates in the presidential election: Camplaigning," writes Dari Bradley of Niceville, Fla.

    e.g., Chief among the current contingent of Democrat camplaigners are Howard Dean, Dick Gephardt, and John Kerry. The others are also-rans in the ranks of camplaigners.

    submitted by [Ed Bradley, Jr.] - (www)

    camprobber - The name everyone used for the Grey Jay, before we were enlightened by ornithologists. An obscure and clever bird that will slip in and pluck food from under your nose if you aren't watchful while eating in the woods.

    e.g., The camprobbers didn't need an invitation to help us eat our lunch.

    submitted by Steve McDonald

    camtender - A person who entertains online in meetings or parties through cam.

    e.g., I the camtender who decides who is to speak and when.

    submitted by Torgaut Gulliksen

    camus - (kuh-MOO; v.) 1. (trans.) to blame, suspect, shame, or ostracize someone for not reacting to a given situation or scenario as one may believe proper. 2. (intrans.) to find oneself in such a situation, either as the ostracized or the ostracizer. (n.) 3. a situation in which someone is blamed, suspected, shamed, or ostracized because their reaction to some event or object differs from the social norm or the preferences of the ostracizer(s). [From the situation at the beginning of Albert Camus's 1942 novel, L'Étranger "the Stranger" (or "the Outsider") in which the protagonist finds himself socially outcast because he can't recall whether his mother had died that day or the day before.] (past tense & participle "camused" (kuh-MOOD))

    e.g., "I didn't know the proper protocol, so I called him 'Biden the Veep,' and suddenly everyone Camused me, like I was week-old halibut."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    camwhore - Someone who has to be the center of attention when a camera is nearby. | A derogative version of "camgirl"; basically, a camgirl who charges for lo-fi webcam pictures of her bearing her breasts. (Bearing them? Carrying them around in a hatbox? On her head? Oh, I get it. She's baring her breasts.) Camwhores also typically have a list of items they want the viewer to buy, and a teenaged-girl themed blog.

    e.g., Look at that picture. Chris is right in the middle of it, the big camwhore. | That camwhore is a real hottie -- maybe if I buy her that Jag, she'll give me her phone number.

    submitted by sam | zach - (www)

    can of corn - Really corny.

    e.g., Those red polka dot shoes? They deserve a can of corn.

    submitted by JP

    can't dance - A response for when someone is agreeable to a suggested activity, since they can't actually go dancing at that moment. (Dedicated to my father, who has used this since I was little and still does to this day.)

    e.g., "Wanna go out for some ice cream?" "Can't dance, sure..."

    submitted by Namons - (www)

    can't fall off - Getting or being part of a good deal. You can't lose.

    e.g., Rolex for $3.99? Why not. I can't fall off.

    submitted by chris - (www)

    can'tribute - A lame act of explaining why it's not possible for you to add your participation and effort to an activity you wish to avoid.

    e.g., Gee, guys, I'd really like to stay here and work late to help our team get this project done in time, but I can'tribute because my teeth are swollen and I have to go to the emergency room.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    can-ible - (adj.) 1. Doable, but with a greater focus on the ability of the doer; 2. Able to be canned, usually said of foodstuffs, but metaphorically applicable to people to be sacked or fired or whatever word you use; 3. Mystery meat, alluding to its potentially grisly provenance. (n.) 1. Foods that can be canned, bottled, or similarly preserved; 2. Someone who can be let go or laid off without harming the company or group doing the sacking or laying off (I wonder why nobody thinks of the poor people being harmed by the sacking).

    e.g., "Is this project can-ible?" "Ordinarily, I'd say yes, but these kids don't have the experience." | Peaches, applesauce, jams and jellies, corn, pickles, fish: all of these foods are can-ible. | "Gleugh! What is this?! Gray meat? Is it even legal to feed us this? Is it even can-ible?" | "You can carry 300 pounds of can-ibles with you, but that's it." | "So far, we've identified 449 can-ible people." "Well, add yourself and get sacking."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    canadaid - A medical and hospital plan in Canada similar to the American Medicaid. The motto of Canadaid might be, "If Canada cain't fix you -- you're daid."

    e.g., All candidates for working with Canadaid must be just as qualified and dependable as any other: dedicated, knowledgeable, warm and friendly.

    submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

    canadian rainbow - A rainbow broken in one or more places. The expression is thought to symbolise Canada's inconsistent policies and legislation in respect to homosexuals.

    e.g., As we drove through the countryside, a Canadian Rainbow appeared from around a sharp bend, looking like several slices of radioactive bacon.

    submitted by Mat Forrester

    canadians - Restaurant slang for non-tippers.

    e.g., Sorry, Justin, a bunch of canadians just sat down in your section.

    submitted by lthrbls - (www)

    canaptious - Scottish word. Similar to "conniving," of a person who is cheeky or talks back.

    e.g., She's a canaptious wee bitch, isn't she?

    submitted by Margaret McDowall - (www)

    canarble wagon - The Canarble Wagon rolls each Friday at 5 p.m. Central time. It also can be utilized on an as-needed basis. Jim Johnson, keeper of the Wagon, explains the origin of the word "canarble": "When I was covering City Hall, there was a reporter there who liked to have a few drinks before -- and occasionally during -- the press conferences. When it came time to head out for after-work cocktails, he'd already be slurring his words, and he'd loudly suggest that we all head out for a few 'canarbles.' We didn't know what word he was actually trying to say, but we knew what he meant." Submitted for Roe, Gary, and Jim at WLS 890 AM, Chicago. http://www.wlsam.com/showdj.asp?DJID=1575

    e.g., Time to roll out the Canarble Wagon.

    submitted by Will Truesdale - (www)

    canardly - To have difficulty in viewing an object, usually due to size.

    e.g., That diamond is so small you canardly see it.

    submitted by Mike Oxbent - (www)

    canary - Not a bird, but someone who is a snitch or informer.

    e.g., When they offered him a plea-bargain, he sang like a canary.

    submitted by Steve McDonald

    canary blood - The new fad of bleaching hair blond, and then making spikes out of it using hair gel.

    e.g., Wes put on some canary blood.

    submitted by Ryan

    canasta glasses - Eyeglasses with the long chain attached, like librarians and old ladies wear.

    e.g., Al Davis looks so stupid wearing those canasta glasses.

    submitted by Scott Lattimore

    canayavesum? - "Can I have some?" slurred into a single word (a "slurd") by drunks (or students) to indicate that they want you to share whatever you have.

    e.g., Whatcha got? Canayavesum?

    submitted by christy

    cancer - Rusted-out section of a car.

    submitted by Greg

    cancer hut - A stand-alone store specializing in cigarettes.

    e.g., My house is right around the corner behind the cancer hut. Can't miss it.

    submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon - (www)

    cancervativism - The brain sickness that causes such hatred of all other points of view that its victims ignore lies, crimes and bullying by politicians they vote for.

    e.g., Since the 2000 election, cancervatism has spread across America at an alarming rate. (also "cancervative: victim, carrier and spreader of cancervatism.")

    submitted by John Roberts

    canco - A Canadian communist.

    e.g., Is that a canco over there?

    submitted by drdevious - (www)

    cancrette - Cigarette. An amalgamation of cancer and cigarette used in the novel The Unusual Life of Tristan Smith, by Peter Carey.

    e.g., I'm dying for, and because of a cancrette.

    submitted by NicDy

    candana - Different, fun way to say Canada, the country.

    e.g., Me and my buddies are all heading up to Candana this weekend to go ice fishing and to take a tour of the Molson plant. How long ya suppose they'll let us swill free brew?

    submitted by bweir

    candellar - (CAN-del-ar; n.) 1. A calendar keeping count of how old various people will be upon their birthdays, so as to plan for a particular number of candles (or black balloons or whatever) on their cake (or cupcake(s) or pie or pizza or whatever). (v.) 2. Counting out the dates, ages, and candle-counts of one's friends and marking the dates, ages, and candles on a calendar. [From a mispronunciation of calendar.]

    e.g., "How did Billie know I was 44 today? What is she, some kind of psychic?" "Oh, the date's down in personnel somewhere, and Axel keeps track for her. He has us all written down on that candellar she keeps on his desk." "All of us?" "So I've heard...wait, what are you thinking?" "Let's find out how old Billie and Axel are!" "No! Don't do that! Others have tried to look in the Candellar of Axel, and they've never been heard from again!"

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    candian routine - Unspecified imaginary gambit, mentioned in order to worry and baffle.

    e.g., "Look, they're using the old Canadian Routine." | "Steady now, you don't really want us to use the Canadian Routine, do you...?"

    submitted by Adam Leslie

    candiculate - (1) To speak freely, off the cuff. (2) To propound on a ridiculous position, as during a barroom discussion.

    e.g., Despite laying out a perfectly sound argument for letting gorillas loose on the streets of New York City, John's friends accused him of wildly candiculating after too many beers.

    submitted by Greg

    candiddate - A politician, seeking election, who attempts to cover his gaffes, insults, and temper tantrums by claiming to be honest and open about his faults.

    e.g., After the ex-governor punched his opponent in the face during a political debate, he smiled and said, "That's me--it's just the way I am! Am I still your candiddate?"

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    candidedate - A political newcomer who sincerely believes in his platform of election reform and honesty in government--from Voltaire's French comedy, of the same name, about innocence meeting the real world.

    e.g., The candidedate's speech was greeted by much applause and knowing winks between lobbyists sitting in the back of the audience.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    candle-a-bra - The method or device, used by exotic dancers, to mount birthday candles on their breasts.

    e.g., i.e. My fraternity brothers dragged me to the gentleman's club for my birthday, and, sure enough, the dancer used her candle-a-bra to totally embarrass me.

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

    candlebar - (n.) 1. Bicycle handlebars used as a two-candle candelabra; 2. by extension, the (successful) reuse or recycling of any discards and the odd cast offs (especially when done in a classy way).

    [Coined, in this sense (there are several senses, apparently), by Michelle Luker with her "candlebar" on Pinterest. This led me into the second sense as I pondered the expansion of its use linguistically.]

    e.g., "What's that on the table? Is that...? What is that? A centerpiece? That's so cool."
    "It's a candlebar. It's made out of classic fifteen-speed Olympic bike handlebars."
    "How many? Is that, like five or six?"
    "Yeah: six, but it's a kind of chandelier. So that's like, a chandelbar?"
    "Okay, that might be a bit weird."

    ------------

    "He's using the back halves of a bunch of '57 Chevys as garden seating?"
    "Yeah: it's a 50s themed garden party. Take a look at the big screen: it's like a drive in theater."
    "With waitresses on roller-skates?"
    "Yeah. This is real candlebar thinking."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    candlestick(s) - 1. (mild rebuke, interj.) "be more generous" or "he must need whatever it is he stole from you ... give him a break." 2. (verb) To make a gift of something someone stole, so that (legally) the recipient has not stolen it; 3. to refuse to bring charges for theft, or to drop charges already filed so as to free the thief of the consequences of his or her actions. 4. (noun) the object or item you give the thief so as to free him or her from the consequences of his or her theft (especially if the item is a part or piece of the thing originally stolen. (From Les Miserable: the reference is to Bishop Myriel "Bienvenu" giving Jean Valjean his silver candlesticks after Valjean has stolen the rest of the Bishop's silver plate, thereby turning the theft into a gift (the Bishop tells Valjean that by so doing, he [the Bishop] has purchased his [Valjean's] soul from evil and given it to God.)

    e.g., "My brother and little sister ate almost all my Oreos!" "Candlesticks, man: give 'em the rest, too ... and then explain to them about taking other people's stuff."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    candorous - Open, frank. From candor.

    e.g., Being candorous may not make me popular, but that's the way I am . . . and the way I want to be.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    canduity - The anger caused by the presence of cows, and cow-related devices.

    e.g., When Billy went to the farm and saw the milking station, he was filled with canduity.

    submitted by Greg G.

    candushi - A rewarding lunch of sushi, paid for by your boss for showing an impeccable can-do attitude and overwhelming positivity, in the face of bad times.

    e.g., After losing the big deal, Anthony took us all out for a litte candushi.

    submitted by Tccoggs

    candy clip - A paper clip-shaped candy, usually fruity.

    e.g., I want to learn how to make candy clips.

    submitted by star651 - (www)

    cane - To cane is to consume vigourously -- often used in reference to drugs.

    e.g., It's not at all unusual for Brit celebrities to be known for caning. | "Last night a close friend of Amy's told me: 'Everyone knows Amy's one of the biggest caners on the scene at the moment, but if she's getting into Class-A's, it's bad news.'"

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    canidiot - An idiot from Canada.

    e.g., Chris, canidiot that he is, fell off the roof again. What whas he doing up there in the first place?

    submitted by erniebordello

    canineline - The device used by dog owners that, when walking their pet, permits the animal to pull out a seemingly endless amount of leash.

    e.g., Did you see the length of that canineline? You could hang laundry on it.

    submitted by Paul S. Hoffman

    canipeliosis - The condition of being contaminated with dog hair.

    e.g., The canipeliosis spread from my sweater to my lunch in record time, rendering the food inedible.

    submitted by jenna

    canipulations - Extreme reaction to something. Jumping around, yelling, etc.

    e.g., My football team won and we were all having canipulations!.

    submitted by Kate

    canis - A person who is not nice, rude.

    e.g., Chris always behaves like a canis.

    submitted by Lukas Friga

    cank - Noun. Pejorative for a Canadian national.

    e.g., The canks are all headed to Flordia for some decent health-care.

    submitted by relay

    canker blossom - That which blasts a blossom as a canker does; a ruiner of something beautiful.

    e.g., I'm not so sure I agree that Brad's a canker blossom.

    submitted by Brad - (www)

    canker soar - Zitsflysch.

    e.g., He tried to canker soar but the pilot was a flighty airhead so he took the airbus instead.

    submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

    cankle - The fatty deposit between one's calf and one's foot. | John Green's The Fault in Our Stars, page 9. Does the word mean the same as awkward or strange? (ED. Being unfamiliar with the 2012 book, let's say it does: cankle = awkward, strange.)

    e.g., My cat just scratched me on my right cankle. | "This was not even to mention the cankle situation."

    submitted by Emma | Ulrich Buetikofer - (www)

    cannabiphobia - Irrational fear, aversion to, or discrimination against the herb cannabis sativa or the people who use it.

    e.g., Our situation started innocently, but we were pushed on by cannabiphobic activists.

    submitted by Crackerjack - (www)

    canned - From "cannabalize." To remove something off of one piece of machinery or equipment to make another work. Machinery being canned from does not have to be broken.

    e.g., One of my headlights went out, so I canned one off my brother's car.

    submitted by Damion

    cannibabilistic - Human-eating baby.

    e.g., Your daughter is cannibabilistic--she's eating your son's foot.

    submitted by Azztin

    cannonophile - Someone who loves cannons -- not a spectatular "creation," but it has meaning for me.

    e.g., I used this word in a conversation with a cannonophile friend a couple of days ago. Jim was an artillery officer in the US Army for about twenty twenty years, with the typical accompanying hearing loss.

    submitted by HD Fowler

    canntabilissumanaryloft - A place of residence.

    e.g., My home can be called my house, my crib, and my canntabilissumanaryloft.

    submitted by Josh Priddy

    canny - Can't, impossible to. Glaswegian term.

    e.g., You canny go round asking people for money.

    submitted by Adrian Hobbs

    canoe beer - Another term for cheap American megabrew lager, from the joke about "the similarities between American beer and sex in a canoe."

    e.g., I just got paid. No more canoe beer for me for a while. I'm drinkin' the imported stuff.

    submitted by captaineyeball

    canoogle - looking to worm your way in on the sly.

    e.g., He's always trying to canoogle a raise with the boss.

    submitted by Frank

    canopacious - A spacious, canopy-like covering. From canopy + capacious.

    e.g., The canopacious night sky was clear and twinkling.

    submitted by Michael Heraghty - (www)

    cans - Audiophile slang for headphones.

    e.g., These cans sound great.

    submitted by Bart

    cantannister - Can + container + cannister. Usually used when you don't know what something comes in.

    e.g., Go get me the cantannister of peanut butter.

    submitted by Peter Bonzani Jr.

    canter banter - Sexual word play. Used when instant messaging with someone online.

    e.g., I love to canter banter when I visit adult websites.

    submitted by Joanna Davis

    cantilever - What a man says when his love for his woman is so intense that he can't bring himself to be apart from her.

    e.g., The guys wanted to know why I wouldn't join them for a "Guys Night Out." I answered, "Sorry, Guys. I love Suzanne so much, that I cantilever."

    submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

    canto pop - Pop music made in Hong Kong, using Cantonese, a Southern Chinese dialect spoken there.

    e.g., Oh, what song is this? Another Canto-pop ballad, no doubt.

    submitted by Robert Wong

    cantthankaurus - A sub-species of the genus Homo Sapiens. Members of the class are distinguished by a constant sour and bitter demeanor and an inability to express gratitude.

    e.g., Hundreds of thousands of restaurant wait staff, store and office clerks, civil servants, airline stewies, DMV employees, attendants of all varieties, English-speaking service telephone responders of various nationalities, and just plain folks who are kind enough to wait and hold a door open, or just allow a car to enter busy traffic at a stoplight, are negatively impacted, on a daily basis, by the growing ranks of the Cantthankaurus.  
     
    While numbers of other species are rapidly declining to the point of possible extinction, the proliferation of this sub-species adds to the high stress levels of modern day life, and, consequently, to the chronically bad health, and temper, of Americans. It's a serious national problem.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    canuckie - That sweet loving thing only a Canadian girl can share. Always warm no matter how cold the winter. Men have been known to drive 2000 miles to get some. Canadian nookie.

    e.g., Check her out. Thats some fine canuckie there.

    submitted by sven dangler

    canuckle - Lying about having a girlfriend, who no one has seen, because she lives in Canada. Typically refers to the behavior of adolescent American boys, though can be interchanged with girls.

    e.g., He was canuckling me when he said he had a girlfriend, but she couldn't come to the dance because she lives in Canada.

    submitted by Joseph Swartz

    canvalanche - The gravitational effect of an "end cap" display of canned goods falling to the floor.

    e.g., My four-year-old started a canvalanche that brought everyone's gaze directly to me.

    submitted by Daniel Roth

    canver - A deliberate obstruction with no practical function other than to provoke.

    e.g., Severely irritated, Sally turned to the canver hooligan and shouted, “Quit canvering me.”

    submitted by Arie Uittenbogaard - (www)

    cap-ex - Short for capital expenditure.

    e.g., "The cap-ex that is being spent is being spent on new infrastructure," said Scott Kriens, Juniper Networks CEO.

    submitted by Philip Mikal - (www)

    cap-four - (n.) Keyboard code for "money" $ (capital four on most Qwertys); Derivations: Cap-four-three $# "how much money?", Cap-four-six $^ "more money", Cap-four-two $@ "where is the money?", Cap-four-five $% "how much is my share?" (to pay or to receive), Cap-four-seven $& "what's the catch?", and Cap-four-eight $* "there is a catch to this." [Sort of a financial emoticon slang.]

    e.g., "Cap-four-two." "In locker 12B." | "She's just gonna give us ten-thousand bucks? ... Cap-forty-seven." "Cap-four-eight. There gotta be a catch."

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

    capacibility - The aptitude to reach the optimum potential for growth.

    e.g., You have capacibility.

    submitted by joshua

    capacitize - Manufacturing term applied to nearing full capacity

    e.g., We need to make sure the line is fully capacitized to reach our true potential.

    submitted by Brian

    capillaryband - A derogatory description of the low-tech capabilities of (typically) your parent's internet connection.

    e.g., Yeah, I couldn't stream their latest video while I was out there, they've got such a capillaryband connection that it's like being at the end of a wet piece of string.

    submitted by Alien Burrito

    capital- - Used to emphasize a word

    e.g., Carolyn forgave Barret for cheating on her because she thinks she's in capital-L-love.

    submitted by Teddy Bowers

    capitalism - The subversion and corporatization or monopolisation of the laissez-faire free market economy by the corporate elite.

    e.g., The laissez-faire free market economy of the United States has been subverted and thus corporatised by the corporate elite. Therefore, it is no longer a free market economy in the hands of the individual, but rather a centralised and regulated capitalist one controlled by corporations.

  • {ED. And what is a corporation if not a fiction used in place of an individual? (Corporations, of course, are ultimately owned by individuals collectively.)}

    submitted by Darius Radmanesh - (www)

    capitalistsia - The capitalist elite of a society, basically the movers and shakers (and some exploiters) of business and industry.

    e.g., The United States of America has the most powerful capitalistsia of any nation in the world.

    submitted by Ryan Schweitzer

    capitalize - For two people to make out.

    e.g., "Did you and Chris capitalize on the first date?"

    submitted by Melissa

    capitalutionism - Refers to the three inevitable evolutional stages of capitalism. This process is categorised into three consecutive levels or steps. (1) Economic capitalism: All focus and activity is exclusively involved with matters of finance and industry. (2) Crony or corrupt Capitalism: This refers to a process whereby capitalism spills over into politics and via various special interest or lobby groups it is able to influence government legislation and policies etc.� (3) State capitalism or Socialism: This refers to the time when capitalism ultimately replaces the conventional national government or political state and essentially becomes the state or system of government.

    e.g., Capitalutionism is the progressional evolving of capitalism in the United states for the past two or three centuries. Capitalism initially was a purely economic system, focusing exclusively on matters of finance and Industry. However, over time it has evolved and has been transformed in to a major element in American politics.

    submitted by Darius Radmanesh - (www)

    capitol punishment - Being sentenced and compelled to fulfill your community service at the Capitol.

    e.g., The judge sentenced me to 1000 hours of capitol punishment.

    submitted by Miss Speller

    capitolism - An economic system of exchange benefiting individuals and corporations with influence in Washington, D.C., or in state geographic centers of political power.

    e.g., It's amazing. It took the liberal "power to the people" Senator just one term in office to become a major proponent of capitolism.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

    capoon - I used to call my penis a capoon for as long as I can remember being able to speak -- 'til about the age of 31.

    e.g., Do you know where I can buy some of those capoon-boosting drugs . . . cheap? I need some help, but my cash flow is close to going negative.

    submitted by joss delaney

    capophilia - Obsessive love of mafia movies such as _The Godfather_, or of the HBO hit show "The Sopranos."

    e.g., Till I got into therapy, I thought I just liked _The Godfather_, but my shrink diagnosed me with capophilia.

    submitted by Dana Friedman - (www)

    capose - To almost make it, focusing on not making it.

    e.g., We were so surprised that John's top-notch physical fitness caposed the physical requirements that could have let him into the Navy Seals.

    submitted by MD Caruso

    capper shorts - The stubbiest of stubby footy shorts you can wear (Warwick Capper style). From famous Aussie footballer Warwick Capper in the 1980s.

    e.g., Chris just split his Capper shorts open when he squatted on the field.

    submitted by Aussie Bloke

    capper's shorts - Said of a stingy person.

    e.g., Chris is as tight as capper's shorts.

    submitted by Mish

    caprahlism - Word used to describe a fat, acne-infested oaf who waddles in and out of hallways.

    e.g., Who the hell is that? That's a firm believier in caprahlism.

    submitted by FlyinDuke

    caprasic - Comes from the Latin word "'Capra," referring to the goat family. Caprasic means "goatlike." It might refer to any of a goat's renowned qualities or representations, but particularly frivolity or childish curiosity. Similar to capricious but is a more positive adjective.

    e.g., My mother's more caprasic than many people of her vintage -- she always wants to know new things.

    submitted by wordgoat - (www)

    capriphile - A lover of goats.

    e.g., Chris, that ole capriphile, was sneaking around behind Elmer's barn last night.

    submitted by Ty Evans

    capsaholic - A person who insists on typing e-mails and text messages completely in capital letters.

    e.g., At first Roz only used capitals to emphasize her emotions, but she soon became a capsaholic and never used lowercase again.

    submitted by Robyn

    captain - What you call someone with immense talent and a recurring ability to screw things up.

    e.g., Well done, Captain Guru.

    submitted by Jupiter

    captain - Implies authority on a given matter due to experience.

    e.g., Steve is Captain Designated Driver because he doesn't drink.

    submitted by ditnis

    captain obvious - One who always points out the things we already know.

    e.g., Thank you, Captain Obvious.

    submitted by Sin - (www)

    capzer - From Caps Lock, which is often employed by Capzers to write their horribly incorrect posts. A person who either writes everything in upper case letters, or everything in lower case letters. This is usually (but not always) a phenomenon isolated to posts/e-mails on the Internet. See entry for "sentstarters," which are a similar species of disordered grammaticians.

    e.g., Intentionally or accidentally, Capzers are still either incredibly rude by yelling with all caps, or simply sloppy in their keyboarding.

    submitted by Trahvagen

    car garden - Car on someone's property that has not been moved for quite some time, usually because it has no tires or would require a tow.

    e.g., Obviously, the car garden had been planted a few seasons ago as the grass was nearly higher than the windows.

    submitted by Rae-Marie Wilson

    car onary - A fit of road rage.

    e.g., Wilson is a family court judge and a good one. Opposing parties and their lawyers praise and respect his ability to see both sides and issue impartial and completely equitable decisions even in the most Solomonic cases. However, when he gets behind the wheel of an automobile, and another driver makes the slightest indiscretion like failing to signal when changing lanes, Wilson has an absolute car onary.

    submitted by Charlie Lesko

    car turd - Clumps of snow or ice that build up in the fenders and wheel wells of cars after becoming detached from their originating vehicle. See also carboogers, fenderburgs, and fendercicles.

    e.g., The snow had melted off of the parking lot, but you could tell where people had parked by the car turds on the ground.

    submitted by Bicycle Bill

    car-bond offset - Carpooling, but it sounds greener. An enviromentally-friendly (and money-saving) way to get to and from work by having several co-workers travel with you.

    e.g., I felt real enviro-guilt driving by myself to work each day until I realized that Steve, Kristi, and Carrie all share the ride and are my car-bond offset.

    submitted by onjaysun

    carabids - "A large and diverse family of mainly nocturnal predatory ground beetles that includes bombardier beetles, sand beetles and tiger beetles." Carabidologist: one who studies the critters.

    e.g., "All carabids are beetles, but by no means are all beetles carabids."

    submitted by Mark Yacoub - (www)

    caractor - From a misspelling of "character": an actor who depends on chase movies for his bankroll.

    e.g., In the late 70s and early 80s, Burt Reynolds may have been America's best known caractor.

    submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

    caraoke - The practice of singing along to the radio while driving.

    e.g., Mabel put on a caraoke show on I-10 with "Goodbye, Earl."

    submitted by Xkot - (www)

    carapei - More than one foul looking insect that has a hard-armoured exterior.

    e.g., In the voice of David Attenborough: And here we see the foul carapei devouring a defenseless spider.

    submitted by jawsman

    carbage - Odours emitted by cars, i.e. engine or exhaust, that smell like garbage.

    e.g., This street smells like carbage.

    submitted by Jidiocmem Prceexti

    carbalicious - Loaded with delicious carbohydrates. Carbilicious, carbolicious.

    e.g., My friend Jill has really porked out since she discovered what she calls the carbalicious diet. Pasta, pancakes, french fries. She never met a carb she didn't like.

    submitted by natalie

    carbeque - A car that is on fire, usually off the side of the road.

    e.g., There was a carbeque on the freeway, slowed down traffic for miles. On top of that, there were at least seven narflabs afterwards.

    submitted by Mike Castellanos

    carbo - any form of life based on carbon

    e.g., You carbos are all the same:)

    submitted by Stella Rosa Hurihanga

    carbo-nada - A food or meal containing no carbohydrates. Any food dish altered to elimate "carbs" to conform with the popular low carb craze in diets.

    e.g., Image Marissa's surprise to find "Sausage Pizza Carbo-Nada" on the new menu at the Pizza Pub. It was served in a bowl, without any crust and was delicious when eaten with a fork.

    submitted by Susanne Strickland

    carbohijinks - The process of food companies jumping on the weight loss bandwagon by coming out with low-carb versions of currently offered products.

    e.g., Wow, talk about carbohijinks -- even my favorite pizza delivery place has gotten in on the low carb craze.

    submitted by Paul Hoffman

    carbolepcy - Somnolent, semi-conscious state that follows the consumption of more carbohydrates than is strictly necessary.

    e.g., Woah, all that pizza I ate has brought on an attack of carbolepcy. Zzzzzz.

    submitted by Nat

    carbon - A copy.

    e.g., "I Carboned that tape for you."

    submitted by Sin - (www)

    carbooger - The clump of snow or mud encrusted to the backside of a car or truck's wheelwell.

    e.g., Upon investigation of the car's declining turning radius, Jim found the Carbooger has impeded his turning ability.

    submitted by phillyJ

    carborater - A person who goes around checking food for carbohydrate content

    e.g., I wonder how many carbohydrates this dessert has -- I think I'll ask the carborater.

    submitted by Earl Egdall

    carborundis non illegitimatum - This word is a chiastic reversal of the famous saying "Illegitimis non carborundum: Don't let the bastards grind you down," attributed to World War II General "Vinegar Joe" Stilwell. This reversal means, of course: "Don't let the grind make a bastard out of you." Note: this saying and reversal appears on the Dr. Mardy language site, under the Chiasmus tab, then clicks on Masters of Chiasmus, then on my name, Dennis Ridley and then the click after that "The Talented Mr. Ridley." Not trying to be self-promoting but only honestly reporting where this item is already published on-line.

    e.g., "Cedric, you look discouraged -- say because your boss is treating you like dirt and you think your country is falling apart? I have these words of advice: 'Hold your head up high and … carborundis non illegitimatum!"

    submitted by Dennis R. Ridley

    carcation - A vacation taken by automobile, as opposed to any other mode of transportation.

    e.g., When we were kids, we used to pile into the station wagon for our annual cross-country carcation.

    submitted by Paul

    carcinogenerous - Adjective describing a person who freely shares his or her cigarette smoke with friends or strangers nearby; euphemism for purveyors of second-hand smoke.

    e.g., That gentleman chain-smoking a cigarette at the next table isn't being an insensitive boor--he's just being carcinogenerous.

    submitted by Cindy Clayton

    carcissist - (CAR-sis-ist; n.) 1. One in love with the image of himself or herself riding in or driving a big, beautiful muscle car; 2. someone who imagines gallivanting about or cruising in a new car (and all of the celebratory pleasures and popularity accruing as a result); 3. a person who sees no value in self or life without wheels. [Analogy from narcissist: one who practices self-adoration, or who is in love with the image of himself, to the exclusion of other interests, including people, except as ornaments to himself.]

    e.g., It was common in 1950s and 60s America for boys to become carcissists, at least for a time. || Jake was a dyed-in-the-wool carcissist: he had looked into the pool of Narcissus and seen his own reflection sitting in a 1970 Plymouth Barracuda with a dual-carburetor, 425 horse-power, 426-cubic-inch Hemi V8 engine, a hood scoop, and a trunk-mounted spoiler.

    submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

    carcolepsy - The condition of falling asleep whenever you are in a car.

    e.g., I can't let Jason drive. I'd be afraid he'd fall asleep at the wheel what with his carcolepsy and all.

    submitted by Douglas Leader - (www)

    cardance - To move to music as if dancing while sitting in a car. This is preferably done while your teenage child dies of embarrassment in the passenger seat next to you.

    e.g., Justin freaked out when I started to cardance at the stop sign in front of his high school.

    submitted by charlesbozonier - (www)

    carding - UK. Soliciting for prostitution by placing a card advertising a prostitute's business in a phone box. Prostitution is not illegal, but carding is. Guardian article.

    e.g., Chris's source of income appears to be carding. Either that or he's a pimp or a drug dealer. I'd bet that he's a card boy.

    submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

    cardiomalus - Bad-hearted, wicked, evil. Examples: The Wicked Witch of the West, The Joker, a middle school bully.

    e.g., The boy had a cardiomalus behavior when he threw mud at the girl.

    submitted by Jennifer Gruetzmacher

    cardiophobia - Fear or hearts.

    e.g., Cardiophobia prevents you from being a heart surgeon.

    submitted by Josh

    cardiovor - Heart eater, eater of hearts, one who devours hearts.

    e.g., Kyle is the biggest cardiovor at school, devoring the hearts of all the gals he's been with . . . i.e., none.

    submitted by Kyle Gannon

    care factor - A rating of how much you care about something, usually zero.

    e.g., Pete: Do you want to go for a jog? Steve: Care factor zero.

    submitted by Steve

    carealess - Used when one doesn't care or isn't listening.

    e.g., "My car crashed into a tree, I stepped on my pet spider, and lost $6,900 in a bet with a pirate." "I carealess."

    submitted by Angel

    carebear - A person who thinks everyone in a game (typically online gaming) should be nice to her and make things easy for her. From the cartoon characters meant to make children believe that everyone should be happy and nice all the time.

    e.g., The carebears whined about the players who raided their settlement.

    submitted by Kevin N. Weinhold

    careeput - Cheap, stingy.

    e.g., Ariel: Buy me a drink? Fester: No. Ariel: You're so careeput.

    submitted by aldwin oliveros

    carfree - A carfree city is simply a city that has no cars (or trucks, at least ideally).

    e.g., Venice is the world's premier carfree city.

    submitted by J.H. Crawford - (www)